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curse my massive sneezes


Superman

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i don't think i have ever posted with a self decription but i'm going through a bit of wierd time and if i can't tell people in here then who the hell can i tell!! lol

I never normally suffer with colds or allergies etc but this morning i woke up not being able to breathe and thought oh dear here we go but off i went to work. I work in an open plan office where there is not much of a hiding place........which has its benefits if you know what i mean.....but these benefits have today turned into my nemesis.

i rarely sneeze in front of others although i would not say never. Sneezing conversations are out of the question unless it is all one way traffic as bizarre as it sounds i cannot possible say the word "sneeze" out loud to anyone else. i don't know why as its a word i like to hear girls use. If a guy uses it......i feel sick haha. To be honest its one of the reasons i post so infrequently as i can hardly write it!!

Anyway my problem..... like i say im suffering with a cold but i hate drawing attention to myself with it and generally just get on with it except i have the kind of sneeze that people seem to want to talk to me about!!! Being full of a cold has meant plenty of sneezing. its probably as they rarely hear me sneeze so it stands out a bit more. Once it starts i have a biiiig breathy hitched build up and then to make it worthwhile a big roar of a sneeze haha. I can't believe i just wrote that, i'm cringing like crazy. Whenever anyone else sneezes nobody blinks...........especially me lol but with me people seem to want to talk about how loud, how many, are you ok, etc etc. i can't answer them!!! or if i do i have to find a way round it without using the word sneeze. i try to cover the build up with two hands over the face lol just coz i would drop dead if anyone saw me, i just need people to stop talking to me about it!!......and will all men please stop blessing me!!! you are making me want to puke!!!! hahaha

i don't really know what the point of writing this was or exactly what i thought it would achieve but somehow i just felt it had to be done haha.

Oh well here's to another day of the same tomorrow!!! aaaaaarrrrrrghhhhhhhh haha

thanks for listening you have been a beautiful audience,

Cheers,

Superman

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awww my poor Superman. Hey, I bet grinner and I could make you feel better :)

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Ha Ha well as far as i am concerned you can both go for your lives and try your best!! :(

This will teach me to go well over a year without a cold. Like i said i don't like to sneeze in front of others.....unless thay ask me nicely haha so today i did my first ever 4 in a row. well i suppose at one point it was my first 3 in a row!! lol not only that it was totally in the open and surrounded by people. Oh how i could have done with the gates of hell opening and swallowing up me and anyone else who dared to see and comment lmao!!!

The only people i would not mind seeing or hearing is anyone from here as at least it may be appreciated haha.

ok i'm off to build up another fit lol.....in private!!!! haha

sneeze ya later. (i am even getting a bit more at ease writing the word now......twice in one post) don't ask me to say it though!!! lol

superman

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well, as I recall, the two of us always made you feel better before :( Even if you weren't feeling particularly poorly ^_^ Didn't we, grin? :(

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That we did, babe! So.. Shall we meet up in Live Chat? What do you say, oh super one? Do we have a date??.. :(

Oh, and 4 in a row... I'm impressed!

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ok i'm off to build up another fit lol.....in private!!!! haha

Enjoy. :D

Hope you're feeling better.

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Awww, you sound so miserable about it! Poor thing! I know what you mean, though, about not getting sick a lot, then when you do, it's usually a whopper!

Just think of it this way, maybe there's a closet fetishist in your office, and they are getitng a secret thrill out of your sneezes? :innocent: Thanks for sharing with us, and hope you're feeling better! :D

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Well seeing as for once i have started a thread i may as well keep it updated especially as people have been good enough to read it and feel my pain lol. The pain continues in great style.

i am still full of a great big bloomin car crash of a cold but being a brave soldier off i went into work today. Before i went into the office i popped into the loo, checking it was empty, locked myself into a cubicle and blew my nose so hard that i could have sailed a toilet across the Atlantic if i had sails up. The point of this ................and i can't believe that i'm actually writing this............. is that as well as the "s" word.......i don't seem to be able to blow in front of others not to mention talk about it. Yes i know i need help!!! lol So this way i thought clear myself out...... no need to blow and hopefully no sneezing.

i walked down the office towards my desk and the very first thing one of my team mates said was "how is the sneezing"?............. i'm mean for crying out loud!!!! for want of keeping my language clean in here. What sort of a question is that???......thinking about it..... almost quite a normal one and i should be glad that a work colleague seemed to be showing concern..but i wasn't......and it still needed an answer though and at that time of the morning its not easy for me to function at the best of times but i just sort of mumbled....alright thanks and scuttled off haha.

Once i had sat down the girl who sits next to me says jokingly...."thought you would have been off today...looks like i'm gonna have to put up with listening to you sneezing all day again" You know i have had 29 pretty good years and if the lord or whoever the hell runs this show had decided to smite my backside off the planet at that point i think i would have called it a draw and taken it just to get out of this conversation. Now she is a nice girl and she sneezes quite a lot through a day and she knows it which is a good thing for me normally except she then says that seeing as i am sneezing all the time we should have a competition and tally them up.......you could not make this up!!! she took a post it note and split it in 2 like a tally scoreboard with out names either side and titled it sneezeboard with a cool drawing of a nose and the word achoo underneath. ( i am dying a thousand deaths just writing this). Its difficult to explain the emotions i was enduring as it was her who was talking about it and drawing a picture about it and writing the word......all good.......but she was also talking about me.....not good. Also there was nobody else around at this time so i could squirm myself though it but this scoreboard got pinned up next to us on the wall so i knew it would become a topic of conversation with others....nightmare. The inevitable happened but luckily she was so pleased with her idea that she explained it to everyone who asked what we were doing.

This all meant that i had to try extra hard not to register a single score haha or if i did make sure there was not too many people about the place. That would not be too difficult normally but not possible at the minute and as soon as i felt the first tickle of the day i was so far ahead of myself; my parents had not even met yet. i was trying to anticipate how i could get out of talking about it or getting on the scoreboard or what she would say etc....i let go a huge dramatic triple effort....definately ill coz i dont normally go past one!! and someone said "chalk it up...do you get 3 points for that?" i just said .......she is the ref and laughed it off and just had to deal with a couple of bless yous..........off guys!!!! QUIT IT!!!! Not to go on about it this continued all day.........(i lost 11 - 8 btw) haha i made sure the scoreboard paper was taken down after most people had left for the day lol.

The next thing i thought of was should i get a grip of myself and actually try to write what had happened in this forum. Could i convey the story in an articulate fashion, does anyone really give a toss? lol i don't know but i have written it anyway and have also in the last two days typed the words sneeze, sneezing, sneezed, build up, achoo, bless you and nose blow certainly more times than ever in the past and could well be more than i ever will again!!! sneeze sneeze sneeze sneeze sneeze sneeze....nope hated it every time and its a cop out writing it in here to you guys lol. The biggest plus or minus depending on how you look at it is that somehow i have managed to avoid actually saying any of these words outloud in front of others despite having been put in a situation where they should have been used possibly around 6 trillion times!!

anyway i am sure that has bored everyone to tears now so hopefully going into work has meant i have been able to pass my germs on and i can recover and these few days will never be spoken of again.

Cheers,

Superman

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awwww sweetie :hug: what a rough day. I would have DIED!!!! :dead:

I am very proud of you for handling it like a big boy though :D Have a cookie :P

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That was all SO sweet!!! And by the way, I love it when guys bless each other, god it is so hot, so you may not like it but some of us do!

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This should be the final installment of the story of my cold leading me into situations that have me wishing for armaggedon to break out at that moment and for me to dragged alive into the devils lair for an eternity of pain as it is preferable to what i was going through at the time lol.

On Sat evening there was a lot of football (soccer for any heathens out there haha) on tv which if it is abroad and we can't actually go to the match so a night down at the pub is a must. This is something that i can't let a flipping cold stop me doing so of i went with a few mates.

i was aware that my nose could get me into trouble at any point but hoped that i had done all my sneezing at home before i left. A few hours went by and a trully awful match had been watched and i had almost forgotten about it. I had even managed to find the toilets empty a few times so i could have a sly nose blow lol.

It was when i went back that disater struck........ the place had emptied a lot after the football finished so we had a couple of tables to ourselves and i was in the corner facing outwards to the whole place. most of my mates had scattered around the place and the 2 remaining decided to go to the bar so i was all alone for a few moments.............then i knew i was gonna sneeze. oh dear...but i was all by myself in the section we were in so i didn't try to stop it..just to hurry it up by sniffing lots and looking at lights lol......the first biiiiigg breath was literally about to be taken when a woman i know but only just to say hello to and most times we don't even do that walked over to where i was sitting as it was on the way to the ladies toilets.

she looked over and smiled and i had two hands over my face taking what was the first of about 6 build up breaths. inside i was imploding and as i looked across through my hands i could see she had stopped and was f*****g staring at me!!!! with a sort of look on her face that said i can see you are gonna sneeze and i am gonna stand here until you have finished so i can talk to you. i reckon this whole build up took about 15 years off my life haha she then said..hi....oh are you sneezing? i have to stop typing at this point to do the biggest squirm that had ever been squirmed in my chair.......i was at the point of no return and she was watching me like i would love to watch others and she was thinking nothing of it!!! haha as i was sat in a corner i also had nowhere to turn to hide my face completely and had to just let rip with 2 massive sneezes and each time she came out with a far too loud bless you!!. i was just thinking please don't say that so loud in case anyone hears you. She then said that loads of people were sneezing in here tonight (saw nothing of that!! lol) and joked that she hoped it was not because of her. this should have been end of convo and in the back of my mind was that friends with drinks would be arriving any minute although this had all happened very quickly but of course it was not the end of the convo as she went on.....she hoped that she didn't start or she would be sneezing all night as she always does 10 sneezes in a row. should i laugh or cry? i just nervously laughed and lost all of my cool lol and then my mates turned up and she stood up quickly and said goodbye........and what the hell made her say to my mates......."i have just been helping your friend with his sneezing" and off she went. NO YOU HAVE NOT!!! what did you say that for?? haha i was asked what was all that about and just shrugged my shoulders and said i dunno and thankfully that was the end of that.

I know next time we make eye contact in speaking distance she may refer to it as it is a conversation starter or possibly she will just forget about it like most people would lol maybe i am being paranoid haha.

still that whole thing probably lasted 2 minutes at most but it seemed like 2 years and nothing else happened the whole night. I have woken up today being able to breathe and in a lot better condition so hopefully that is end of my dramas!! haha.

i'm glad i wrote it all down and maybe i will continue to do so in the future.

Cheers and be well,

Superman

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Awe! This is one of the cutest obs ever! I can not believe that girl just sat there and watched you sneeze ... I guess now you know how people feel when we do that to them, ha ha! anyway, I hope you're feeling better, and thanks for such a terrific obs!

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