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High on Lullabies

Forum Moderation and Regulation Poll

Forum Moderation and Regulation Poll  

197 members have voted

  1. 1. Are you happy with the overall quality of service provided by the Staff?

    • Yes
      152
    • No
      21
    • I Don't Know
      24
  2. 2. How happy are you with the quality of moderation on the forum? (10 = Perfect, 1 = You never get anything right!)

    • 10
      28
    • 9
      58
    • 8
      50
    • 7
      26
    • 6
      8
    • 5
      10
    • 4
      9
    • 3
      5
    • 2
      2
    • 1
      1
  3. 3. How do you feel about the level of regulation on the forum?

    • Very over-regulated
      21
    • Over-regulated
      53
    • About right
      118
    • Under-regulated
      4
    • Very under-regulated
      1


Recommended Posts

•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•

I must respectfully disagree with Megacycle. Having recently joined, myself, I was simply glad to be part of a community that I could relate to, and knew that in my due time I would get to do stuff. It was exciting and kinda fun when i noticed i had a message system; like unlocking a secret area on a videogame.

The thing I like about it now that I've been here a while and seen some things, and from my experiences on youtube, is that I feel really safe with the current restrictions in place; new people cannot just come in and message me and look at my profile all willynilly, they have to prove trustworthy first.

On ordinary forums, this would certainly not be a concern of mine to this extent, but on a site such as this which deals primarily in sexuality and aspects of such, it feels reassuring to have extra security in place. Especially since sharks do lurk unexpectedly around.

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Kiwifruit

I have to agree completely with Amyparda - she said everything I was thinking but in a much better way than I would have :P I love it as it is. I love the community and that the validation process helps keep the community really high quality, much more so than most other forums where anyone can join with no restrictions. I feel very safe and comfortable here. When I joined I was thrilled to bits to be a member of the community in any way I was allowed and was really happy when I was validated. It really doesn't take that long if you contribute well and have just a liiiittle bit of patience! There is still plenty people can do while waiting :)

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megacycle

I understand where you are both coming from, but not all new members may view this as a challenge. They might view it in a negative way. Not all are positive or optimistic.

They will automatically think they have done something wrong when filling out the information to join. They may even create a second account because they thought they messed up when registering with the site the first time. The restriction on the chat room and adult/youth boards makes sense, but the inability to use the search engine, view profiles, and private message is what would confuse people the most. Three basic functions that anybody can do on any other site at any level. if not validating members then surely pending level members deserve the ability to do that much?

Time for a little truth. "Opinions are like a**holes. Everybody's got one and everyone thinks everyone else's stinks"

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tma

As someone who has been here since day 1, has been on Staff for 4 years (in the past) and has been through having no restrictions to having current levels, I hear what you are saying megacycle, BUT....

1) The filling in information- I've had to do that for other places, and then be validated. I didn't think that it was onerous, but... that is a matter of opinion.

2) I really, really, really Hate to say this, but... sometimes it would be helpful if people read things. Again, I've had to do the same thing as far as other sites. It can be a pain- but it does save time and frustration sometimes.

3) I'm really glad that you see the need to restrict chat and youth/adult sections. smile.pngsmile.png

4) Search engines... well... to be honest- I personally don't really understand that restriction. blushing.gif I don't think that it means that staff is bad or unreasonable- because I really haven't asked them reasoning with that- and there probably is one. I just don't really know.

5) Viewing profiles- this one I know. There are things that people put on their profiles that they *Don't* want just anyone to see. Now, granted there *are* people who are completely fine with anyone who comes on here seeing everything, but there are people who have put up a personal picture of themself or email/IM info that they wouldn't put up if they didn't feel that someone was making sure that people who have access to the profile were OK. People *Have* gotten stalked, trolled, harrassed etc.- and I personally think that it helps to have that process. We *have* had times in the past where there have been floods of trolls (aka people who just want to make fun of us and degrade us).

6) Private messaging is the same thing- it's sort of like the reason that there isn't access to chat. There was a time when there were people (not to sound sexist- but basically guys) who would join and automatically PM *Every* female on the forum with requests for .wavs or chatting. Or spamming them. It was really annoying. That's why that restriction is in place.

I understand the frustration, I honestly do if you are new and see someone that you want to get to know and there really isn't a good way to figure out how to communicate. I'm not sure what a good solution would be, and I'm not on curently on Staff (although- I would suggest something if I thought that it was reasonable and balanced connections and safety). Having been both just a regular member and a person who was on Staff I do see both sides. There are things that the Staff members see and hear (posts on the board and messages that members send), that non Staff never do. There are discussions about how to do what is best for the members overall. Obviously they cannot ever make everyone happy all the time, and you (and others) may think that their reasonings are flawed or that they make bad decisions all or some of the time- but they don't make decisions (especially ones about basic rules) just as one person or without thinking about the members.

The reason that it isn't for Pending is that to get to know a person, it helps to see a pattern of behaviours. And Staff can't do that without seeing posts. There have been people in the past where people would have one or two good posts and then SPAM or Trolling or sharking (aka pestering people for information or requests when they are clearly uncomfortable) would occur.

You don't have to agree with me as far as that the rules are reasonable- but... those *are* the reasons- and those are the facts. If someone wants to open up a forum that has really easy access and less restrictions, honestly they are welcome to do that. I think that people have in the past. Because this community has a lot of people- and people do have differences of opinion and differences in comfort level. This particular forum has its own philosophy as far as the level of protection that they want to offer its members. Other forums have stricter standards (I do know this is true), and others have more relaxed standards. Its what the owners and staff feel comfortable with. smile.png

Hope that makes sense. smile.png

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Vetinari

I was just typing a response when tma's post popped up and she has said everything I wanted to say in plenty of detail.

I will only add that the majority of members here do manage to gain access without serious problems, and in general, if new members do something inappropriate, for example setting up a new account in the very early stages because they felt there was something wrong with their first account, then I believe that the senior staff do take their newness into account. I can understand someone registering again in the very early stages as I seem to recall that after initial registering, almost everything disappeared but I think it is very unlikely that any new member who had gained the ability to post in the majority of places would believe there was something wrong with their account and set up another, just because the PM, search and personal profiles weren't available to them yet. Some of them are certainly unsure, but the information is freely available on the forum, and if people haven't realised that, but ask us, we usually point them in the right direction.

We understand that new members do make mistakes. That is not the same, however, as a member coming on board, breaking the rules, and then trying to register a new account as an attempt to circumvent the warning they have received.

You are correct when you say everyone does have an opinion, and the staff do keep a careful eye, both on this thread, the attached poll, and various other places on the forum where feedback can be given. On the whole, I believe that the vast majority of members are reasonably satisfied with the current situation. We are never going to please everyone but we are doing our best to listen. I will try to find out if there is a reason why the Search function is not available to all.

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megacycle

Thank you for the clear description on everything.

I understand now why everything is the way it is. That doesn't mean I agree with every thing. But I don't run the site and I have no time of my own to try and create one myself.

As I said before about opinions. I just felt like sharing mine. I'm surprised anyone actually commented afterwards. Thank you tma and Vetinari.

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AriZona370

Its true that i have never seen a fight or any sort of hate on this sight which means somethings wrong with the internet stunned.gif just kidding this place is safe and people can feel open here or at least i can XD

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Hedgehog

Initially - I really like it that you have this poll and discussion thread for everyone. This shows you are interested in the opinion of the users of these forums. My impression is this is a very nice website with an active and dedicated moderation staff. I followed the discussion and agree with most of the answers. smile.png

There are only a few points that don't make me an entirely happy hedgehog.

The first is that I don't really understand the validation system. Yes, I've read all the FAQ's about it. But I see users who have more than 500 posts and seem really nice and decent, but they are still not validated. (e.g. “hails”: http://www.sneezefet...showtopic=51339) Others have only 50 posts and are already validated. Of course I can't know everything about these persons, but - although I don't find the system "over-regulated", I at least find it a bit obscure.

Second - the editing problem. Of course I can understand that you don't like someone to destroy a complete discussion or to leave the site and editing all their posts. But…

a ) You can't be sure a full member wouldn't do that. (I've seen someone in another forum doing this and it was a member who had been there for five years and this person edited more than 1000 posts. We all have our strange moments from time to time... wink.png) And…

b ) Can't there be any compromise? (if the software here allows this) - I know a lot of forums where people can edit their own posts for a certain period of time - e.g. for 15 minutes or until the first reply. This would (in most cases) be enough to correct the typos and it wouldn't destroy any discussion. And there can be really bad typos. An example: Not a long time ago I wrote a blog entry that should be called "A question to my friends" - and the typo was "fiends" instead of "friends" blinksmiley.gif I was lucky this didn't happen here but on a website where I could correct this...

And third - It's a bit frustrating I can't use the wonderful tag- and search-system and I don't really understand why this is not allowed. (Couldn't find any answer here or in the FAQ's about that either.) blushsmiley.gif

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Vetinari

Initially - I really like it that you have this poll and discussion thread for everyone. This shows you are interested in the opinion of the users of these forums. My impression is this is a very nice website with an active and dedicated moderation staff. I followed the discussion and agree with most of the answers. smile.png

Thanks.

There are only a few points that don't make me an entirely happy hedgehog.

The first is that I don't really understand the validation system. Yes, I've read all the FAQ's about it. But I see users who have more than 500 posts and seem really nice and decent, but they are still not validated. (e.g. “hails”: http://www.sneezefet...showtopic=51339) Others have only 50 posts and are already validated. Of course I can't know everything about these persons, but - although I don't find the system "over-regulated", I at least find it a bit obscure.

I can't comment at all on individual members. Obviously each person has a right to privacy regarding their account.

In general though, the majority of people make it through validation in a reasonably short period of time. It does take the staff some time to examine an account for validation purposes, and for that reason, the checks do not occur for everyone immediately after they have 50 posts. There are currently three staff who carry out the validations, and we don't do it every day as it is quite time consuming. Unless someone posts very quickly, the validation check usually occurs between 50 and 100 posts.

When the forum was first set up, there was no validation process as such. It has been gradually added in, as the site has become busier, and more visible to trolls. Therefore, there will be some members who have validated status, but have not reached 50 posts yet. In addition, any member who has one or more warnings will not be validated until their warnings are removed. Warnings are never given lightly, the staff discuss each case prior to taking any action, and we do our best to keep the system consistent, though we do bear in mind previous behaviour, and whether the rule-breaker is a new person, who might reasonably be assumed to have made a mistake. In addition, when we hand out a warning, the member in question is provided with a full explanation, and after certain set periods of time, the account is reassessed.

Incidentally, if anyone is reading this, and has a warning they feel should have been removed, please do get in touch. We aren't perfect, and sometimes things do get missed.

Second - the editing problem. Of course I can understand that you don't like someone to destroy a complete discussion or to leave the site and editing all their posts. But…

a ) You can't be sure a full member wouldn't do that. (I've seen someone in another forum doing this and it was a member who had been there for five years and this person edited more than 1000 posts. We all have our strange moments from time to time... wink.png) And…

b ) Can't there be any compromise? (if the software here allows this) - I know a lot of forums where people can edit their own posts for a certain period of time - e.g. for 15 minutes or until the first reply. This would (in most cases) be enough to correct the typos and it wouldn't destroy any discussion. And there can be really bad typos. An example: Not a long time ago I wrote a blog entry that should be called "A question to my friends" - and the typo was "fiends" instead of "friends" blinksmiley.gif I was lucky this didn't happen here but on a website where I could correct this...

I believe that once validated, there are limited abilities for editing, as described. In addition, if you are a writer, then there is the writer's group, which allows you to edit your stories. If there is something you would like edited, then please feel free to get in touch.
And third - It's a bit frustrating I can't use the wonderful tag- and search-system and I don't really understand why this is not allowed. (Couldn't find any answer here or in the FAQ's about that either.) blushsmiley.gif

Again, I believe this should be available to validated members. HoL is more au fait with all the intricacies of the system though, so if that's incorrect, then please feel free to ask again and I will find out.

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Hedgehog

Dear Vetiari,

thank you for your prompt and very detailed answer to my questions. smile.png

...the majority of people make it through validation in a reasonably short period of time

...There are currently three staff who carry out the validations

...Unless someone posts very quickly, the validation check usually occurs between 50 and 100 posts.

...In addition, any member who has one or more warnings will not be validated until their warnings are removed.

These arguments are all very reasonable and easy to understand. Thank you! smile.png (Perhaps some of these points could be added to the validations-faq? It just answers a lot of questions probably every new user in these forums has.)

Also thank you for the indication of the Writer's group.

Now that I no longer live with the fear I might wait for years and write thousands of posts without ever being validated, I think I can manage to wait patiently. hypocrite.gif

Best wishes,

a reassured and a lot happier Hedgehog

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Isiss444

i am a new member, so I am obviously anxious to be validated and become a full member, but i completely agree with the way things are being run here. I have been very active in quite a few forums over the years, and moderated a few as well, so i know how much effort is necessary to create an environment that feels safe and secure, as well as casual. I am excited to get to know people through this community and pleased to see it is run so well!!

awesome job everyone!toot.gif

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Shining Light

> Thread was started in 2010

Man, I got old.

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Wildwood

I do appreciate the firm yet appropriately subtle way the mods & admins work to keep us all in line :)

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chessgod

the fact that we have mods here to "keep the peace" is a great idea, though I feel in a lot of ways, some of them go way overboard in policing specific posts...I personally and I think others may agree, that things are sometimes taken way out of context when they decide to hide posts, or send private messages regarding some posts. mind you this is still a great place for all of us to meet, share our common fetish, I just think the "grip" at times is a bit too tight from "big brother" lastly, the qualifications for full membership requirements certainly needs to be addressed. I feel that someone who simply comments on posts or posts new topics on a fairly regular basis should have their full membership access be granted just as quickly as someone who writes stories, posts wavs of themselves, etc. keep up the great work mods...and don't take things too personally :)

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Cocobalt

Hope y'all will allow me to toss in my two cents smile.png. Personally,I've read all of the forum rules and guidelines among other things several times and seeing some of the restriction in action,it's pretty fair as far as fetish sites are concerned. Sure it might be a bit harrowing to get used to a different format,especially for those whose lives don't permit much time to explore the site in depth. However, I see the registration process as meeting the site and staff halfway for their open-mindedness. Being given basic(or better) membership into a community of 3000+ most of whom share a common factor with you and have a wealth worth of creative and interesting material to share. All that is needed is the minimum commitment of a bit of patience and some participation. Seems like a pretty cheap deal to me yes.gif

Seeing as how this site has had quite the history,it would make sense to have some want privacy protected from trolls or a further relationship with some of the community before diving right into sneeze chat. Not to speak for them in anyway,but I see that most of their collective philosophies carry over to how the forum and its users operate. In a nutshell,I appreciate the effort the staff make to keep us all from a less perferable fate. As some find the restrictions really tight, it only gets better as time marches on. A little effort goes a long way.

Sidenote: This isn't as eloquent sounding as I'd like since the question can get a whole lot of different answers in different places. I'll clarify what I need to if anyone asks.

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SneezyP

I was a little taken aback that I wasn't even allowed to post a non personally identifiable email address as a new user, but I can understand how the staff here might feel like they need to make sure they won't be responsible for allowing something shady to happen. Somebody else told me they'd been warned for a minor incident, though I don't have any opinion on that, not knowing all sides of the story. Having been a forum moderator myself several times before I can sympathize with the balance that you're required to maintain, especially in a sensitive forum like this one. Even if they were to be a little stringent, I could definitely forgive them.

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Medowsweet

Just gonna say:. I have been here a long time and don't post much.

Years ago I was on under a different name (Adrilyn) but then I didn't get on for a long time and forgot my password!!!!   ^_^o

Then I started a new account as Meadowsweet and was validated fairly quickly (maybe because I write a lot of (what I consider to be quality) stories?)

But here is the catch!  I may get on, post a flurry of stories, a few comments, PM a friend, then dissapear for a while... then get back on.  I am a super busy single mom and I don't have tons of time.  Sometimes a story muse hits me, sometimes I really feel "into" the fetish, other times I have more pressing things to deal with.

Often I make friends here who randomly disappear for no apparent reason.

I wouldn't say I am flaky or not I interested in the community, and when I AM on I write stories and look for friends... I don't really "lurk" I just go into phases of this being a "big hobby" of mine and this being "on the back burner".

Not that you were talking to me. Just saying why someone may be on here a long time but their posts imply they don't post much.

Then again, I personally had no trouble being validated.

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Medowsweet

At least not up to "poster" level which lets me pm people and also change my profile and stuff...

Prehaps you need to be a "member" to do chat?  I don't know, I haven't tried it.

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Joal 555
1 hour ago, Medowsweet said:

Prehaps you need to be a "member" to do chat?  I don't know, I haven't tried it

 

Just to confirm that any validated member (regardless of their level above validation) is able to access the chatroom.

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snzmn2016

Your efforts are very passionate and much appreciated. However, we shouldn't have to wait indefinitely before we can be vetted if it means we can't communicate with others and refusing to let people share contact info in posts is overregulating.

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•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•
On 10/23/2020 at 5:51 AM, snzmn2016 said:

Your efforts are very passionate and much appreciated. However, we shouldn't have to wait indefinitely before we can be vetted if it means we can't communicate with others and refusing to let people share contact info in posts is overregulating.

this isn't set up this way intentionally. the forum is currently SEVEREly understaffed, there's literally one person on staff right now who has the ability to validate new members- and she has a very full life. 

the system when it was set up had a lot more people able to validate and ran a lot more smoothly than it does today. i was validated real quickly for example but there were actual people able to do that back then. 

unfortunately there's nothing anybody can DO about it because the one person able to appoint new validators so to speak, has more or less stopped coming here or paying much attention to the forum very often. 

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Cecilia
On 10/23/2020 at 5:51 AM, snzmn2016 said:

Your efforts are very passionate and much appreciated. However, we shouldn't have to wait indefinitely before we can be vetted if it means we can't communicate with others and refusing to let people share contact info in posts is overregulating.

Thanks for the feedback. We understand how frustrating this must be, but as @•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.• said, the validation process has stalled due to us having a limited number of administrators. In the meantime, you can use the Contact Us feature to request that we make your email/other contact info visible in your profile. Once we are able to, we'd like to assure you that validations will take top priority. 

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Jettous

I think the verification system is a little to strict (don’t get rid of it but maybe lower the post requirements a little). Otherwise I think the moderation is perfect.

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