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Mass Effect - The Debriefing (F)


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Mass Effect – The Debriefing (F)

Characters are all taken from Mass Effect 2 – enjoy!

Commander Shepard stared through the forward view-port, watching the stars shift as the Normandy tilted on its axis. He blinked, trying to free his mind of the sense of vertigo, and wondered how his pilot – Joker – managed to stare at the same view all day, seemingly with no ill effects.

Somewhere ahead, one of a billion shimmering stars, lay the Citadel; home of the Presidium and their destination. A sleek speck in the blackness, the Normandy streaked forward.

Shepard sighed, letting the air slowly out of his lungs as he allowed himself to relax for the first time in hours. He started to release his helmet catches, disengaging the communication unit, when…

…a sneeze thundered into his ear through the helmet to helmet link. It was so loud that it was distorted by static; a violent shriek that caused Shepard almost physical pain.

‘Oh God, I’m sorry!’ He heard Samara’s voice, her normal controlled tone wavering, betraying her need for further sneezing. Shepard managed to remove his earpiece in time for the second sneeze to be diminished to an explosive burst of static from te speaker.

He reached out and flipped on a monitor, the picture wavering as it defined its focus. A view of the cargo bay appeared, just in time for him to see Samara convulse in another ear-splitting sneeze. She bent sharply at the waist, despite the tight confines of her combat suit. Beside her, Shepard saw Miranda remove her helmet, shaking her head at the asari’s obvious loss of control and composure.

‘Sorry Shepard…its…aaaah …must be some pollen fromaaahhhh…aaaah…down on the surface.’ Her voice - usually so self-assured - wavered vulnerably. Shepard leaned forward, feeling an odd sensation in his chest. The ship suddenly seemed uncomfortably warm.

‘Commander?’ Miranda tucked her helmet under her arm. ‘What orders?’

Shepard stuttered, distracted as Samara reared back, delivering yet another explosive sneeze, more or less contained within her hands.

‘Ah…yes…you must,’ he started, before pulling himself together as if rising from a trance. ‘Both of you report to the briefing room immediately. We need to discuss what happened down there.’

On the monitor, Miranda nodded curtly. Samara only blinked, a faraway look in her deep blue eyes.

Shepard leant back on his chair, setting his jaw firmly in a pose demanded of a commander of his reputation. He rubbed a gloved hand through his stubble, glancing up as the hiss of the opening door cut through the omnipresent hum of the Normandy.

Miranda stalked in. her hips swished suggestively in her tight combat fatigues and she flashed a sly smile in Shepard’s direction, but he barely noticed her presence.

Shepard was watching Samara instead. She was clutching her delicate nose between thumb and forefinger, eyes blinking rapidly. He could not help noticing the rapid rise and fall of her chest that shook with each gasping breath she took.

Samara sneezed! She had known it was coming and managed to contain it somewhat. The sneeze blew around the hand she had frantically clasped to her nose and mouth.

Miranda wheeled on her; angry at Shepard’s failure to respond to her presence, angry at Samara’s repeated sneezes. ‘Will you stop that?!’ she thundered. ‘You almost got us killed down there with your wretched sneezing, you…’

‘That’s enough!’ barked Shepard, rising to his feet. Samara split the air with another shrill sneeze, clearly upset yet unable to rid her nose of whatever alien pollen was tormenting it.

‘Miranda – we are a team. Until you are ready to begin acting like one, I suggest you leave!’ Miranda glared at him, before spinning on her heels and marching from the room. The sound of her boot clicking across the floor mingled with the hitching gasps of Samara as she tried to contain yet another explosive sneeze.

‘Are you alright?’ asked Shepard, a curious, all-encompassing sensation of concern and protectiveness coming over him. What was wrong? He suddenly felt more helpless and jittery than he had ever felt on a hundred missions.

He watched Samara fight against her inevitable sneeze; watched her mouth open ever-so-slightly, her blue skin wrinkle around the bridge of her nose as the tickle forced her face to contort with its intensity.

And then – the release! The asari was forced to snap forwards at the waist, the sneeze roaring out of her, becoming a cascading triple as sneeze followed sneeze, her body succumbing to her noses desire. She looked up, blue eyes watering, hand held ineffectually to her mouth. Shepard heard himself talking, almost involuntarily.

‘Um… maybe we could continue this debriefing in my quarters? You know, it really is much more comfortable.’

Samara stared back at him with her blue within blue eyes, and nodded.

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That was a lot of fun! Miranda getting all huffy is just like her.

I hope you'll consider a sequel, and maybe get some of the other characters involved! :blushing:

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HOLY MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS GOOD!!!!! I am in LOVE with you for doing a story over Mass Effect. It is my all time favorite game to play (am currently replaying the first game). Oooooo This is sooo good! >.< *Squirms and squeals and all that good amazing stuff*

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That was really cool. I liked it a lot! :D

I personally never took Samara as the explosive sneezer, it seems perhaps out of character - Miranda maybe, I have her sneeze pictured perfectly in my head! :laugh: - however a well composed person losing control is always interesting. I'd really like to see more. It would be unforunate if Miranda caught Samara's cold or developed a similar allergy or whatever it happens to be. I'm sure that would get her even more riled up! :heart:

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