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Sickly Sleuth (Sherlock, BBC series, M)


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Just a little drabble based on the BBC series 'Sherlock', a modern version of Sherlock Holmes. There's no spoilers for anything in here, so you can read it even if you haven't seen the series.

Warning, slight mention of messy congestion, so if that really bugs you, I wouldn't read.



A loud crunching noise came from under John’s foot the moment he entered the second story flat at 221B Baker Street. He lifted his shoe, expecting to see a shattered test-tube or a bit of bone, but there was nothing there. He stepped again, and another crunch resulted, slightly quieter. He shook his foot and a bit of throat lozenge flew off; its sticky wrapper still adhered to John’s sole.

He plucked the gooey paper off and flung it in the rubbish bin on his way to the kitchen. The living room was a disaster, with books and a few sodden handkerchiefs strewn about. Deftly avoiding two empty tea cups on the floor, he turned the corner into the kitchen to find Sherlock in his dressing gown, bent over a microscope.

“I’m gone a weekend and you manage to make this place a disaster?” he asked.

“It was only a weekend?” Sherlock replied, not looking up from the microscope.

“Are you ill?” John asked. “What in the hell are you looking at under there?”



John raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, snot,” Sherlock replied. “Secretion of the mucosa; a case of rhinorrhea.”

“And you’re doing this, why?”

“You’re making my head ache with these inane questions,” Sherlock snapped. “I’m trying to deduce what is ailing me so I can figure out who gave me this bloody cold and I’m going to go strangle them, that’s what I’m doing.”

He finally raised his head from the eyepieces and John was aghast to see how awful Sherlock looked. His normally porcelain-white skin was flushed and his strong nose was a painful shade of red. The pale blue eyes staring at him were rheumy and shadowed by dark circles.

“You look terrible,” John said, approaching the detective as he pulled his handkerchief from his pocket. “Here.”

He gave his friend the scrap of soft flannel and Sherlock raised it to his nose, blowing it wetly.

“Why aren’t you in bed?” John asked.

“No time,” Sherlock replied. “I…”

He paused, raising the handkerchief back to his face.


A damp sneeze exploded into the cloth and Sherlock drew it away from his nose with a miserable sniff.


Before he could react, he sneezed again, spraying wetly as he directed the sneeze into his shoulder.

“Well, I’m a doctor and I’ve seen quite enough to tell you that whoever gave you this cold gave you a pretty bad one, so it’s to bed with you.”

“I swear it was Lestrade,” Sherlock fumed, bending back over the microscope.

“Uh, uh,” John said, grabbing Sherlock by the arm. “No way. C’mon, you. Let it go, Sherlock.”

“If I get one of the tissues he used, I can compare the virus strains to see if they are the same. I’ll need to use the microscope at St Bart’s though,” Sherlock said, reaching for a glass slide and putting it into a case.

“Sherlock, no one cares who the hell you got it from and I’m certain no one else wants your bloody cold, so stay in and forget about it.”

“I’m sure it was him anyway,” Sherlock muttered. “I called the station and they said he’s called out sick.”

“Go on and get into bed and I’ll put the kettle on. Do you want some soup?”

“No,” Sherlock said, gathering several petri dishes to put in the refrigerator.

“Suit yourself. Go on, then.”

Sherlock retreated towards his bedroom, shutting the door behind him. John heard the creak of bedsprings and a long sigh of resignation.

The consulting detective was not going to be an easy patient, he was sure of it.

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Wehhh so cute! I haven't watched the BBC Sherlock yet, but it's usually exploding all over my tumblr dash so I might as well have, at this point. Super adorable, I love the interactions!

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Awwww! You got the characters just right. :lol: This should have happened after "The hounds of Baskerville" I think. :P (With the door "Do not enter if you don't want a cold" or something to similar effect.)

Very enjoyable. :)

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This is the best welcome home present I could get after a weekend away XD I guess now is the time to admit to being mildly obsessed with this show :laugh: And you've captured it wonderfully! I'm crossing my fingers that you're thinking about writing more, you've got me hooked now :wub:

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Love it~! So much~! I love Sherlock! ...Well... And Holmsian adaptation, really. And Benedict Cumberbatch... Yum. <3

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I'm not a fan of fanfic, with the exception of Holmesian fic. Oh, I've got it bad for Sir Arthur and his boys.

This homage leaves me well-pleased. Well done!

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