New and in search for advice !

[Anyaa]

Hey,

I`ve just joined this forum after reading the posts for, uhh ... two/three years maybe ?

I didn`t even know this `fetish` existed before I stumbled across this forum and was completely shocked ... coz I thought I was the only one

Anyway, you all seem very `okay` with having this fetish, maybe even enjoying it, but let`s just say it`s not that simple for me.

Basically, I`m Muslim and as some of you might already know, we`re not supposed to have any relationships before marriage, and even when we`re married, any sexual enjoyment has gotta be with our husband/wife, and with our husband/wife ONLY.

So maybe you can see the problem with being `attracted` to anyone that sneezes, when we`re supposed to avoid anything that arouses us, unless it`s with our husband/wife.

(I ain`t married yet, so, no allergy-suffering husband to watch sneeze )

I`m sure any Atheist reading this is either rolling their eyes, or muttering about how crazy we are ... but we all have things we`re dedicated to in life.

Does anyone have any ideas on how to get rid of this fetish, or at least minimize it, or any tips on how to control our desires to avoid feeling the way we do when we hear someone sneeze ?

And if there`s any other Muslims reading this, PLEASE reply !

Even if you`re not a member on this forum, join and reply !

Although I`d be very surprised if there was any Muslims that are in this same situation, seeing as we`re supposed to keep thoughts like these OUT of our minds as much as possible

Thanks,

Anya.

P.S., I AM probably one of the youngest members on here, soo ... don`t start telling me that I`m gonna miss out on a lot in life or whatever

Lol, at my age, I shouldn`t even be thinking of this.

[Zebra]

Hello, welcome to the forum

First of all I'm not a Muslim. I don't really know what I believe in. It changes a lot but either way I'm familiar with the religion a little. I've noticed a few members who haven't been over the moon with the fetish so you're not alone. Plus I'm sure an atheist wouldn't be rude or disrespect your worries because they're YOUR beliefs. It doesn't matter what other people think. Anyways, from what understand you can't actually "get rid" of a fetish. I suppose it's like being gay. You can't train yourself to be straight. Plus I'm sure any attempt to rid yourself of this fetish would be very hard and maybe even painful if you tried something radical. However, a lot of members will agree with me here when I say the fetish waxes and wanes. I've gone through periods where I haven't been all that interested in it, then a week later I could be craving. It varies a lot with different factors like periods, well-being etc. When I was younger, my fetish was A LOT STRONGER. I couldn't control it sometimes. Since finding out that this is indeed a fetish I've spent a lot of time watching videos, reading stories etc. As a result my fetish has cooled down and I'm not so rabid with it. I still love, love, love sneezing don't get me wrong, but now it's more manageable. So over-exposure would be a way to lessen it but obviously that's going against your religion so we're in a bit of a devilish circle here. If you try and force the thoughts out of you mind, chances are the taboo will just be even stronger. Sometimes you have to let thoughts like this cross your mind. I know this isn't the information you really want to hear but from my experience that's all I can give sorry. Hope it helped a little

[Anyaa]

Hey, thanks for understanding !

Hmm, I thought some people might get offended with me wanting to get rid of the fetish, coz from reading the posts on here for the past two/three years, sneezing seems to be a really important thing in some members lives

I guess over-exposure could be okay if it results in lessening the fetish ...

I`ve heard about gay people going straight, so if their sexuality can change over time, maybe I could possibly just get tired of sneezing one day ?

Anyway, it`s great to hear you understand me, even though we`re not at all in the same situation

[Natto]

I'm agnostic, but I understand that people have their own belief systems, and I'm not going to laugh at you or roll my eyes!

There are a few things that you can do.

1) See if you can talk to a Mulsim adult about your situation. You don't have to talk about the fetish if you're not comfortable doing so, you can just talk about sexual desire in general. Most of the adults in your life have probably struggled through something similar, as sexual desire is something that everyone experiences. They may have some advice about how to deal with your feelings and still stay true to your faith. Also, though it's probably best to ask a Muslim adult, since they can talk specifically about your religion, you may also be able to discuss this with devout Jews or Christians, as many of them have similar prohibitions and beliefs about sex. In any case, it should be someone you know and trust.

2) If there are no adults in your life who you can share this with, see if you can see a therapist. I don't know how old you are--I'm guessing that you're a minor based on your "youngest person on the forum" comment. Your parents may be able to help you find a therapist to discuss this with, and if not, your school may have counselling services. Because therapists are bound to secrecy unless you are a risk to yourself or someone else, you can give them full information. I was going to therapy for a while, and I told my therapist about my fetish. She asked if I wanted to get rid of it or simply explore its origins--I didn't want to get rid of it, but apparently, it's possible. I don't think the process is pleasant, however.

3) If you hear someone sneeze, try to think about something else. Put on music. Read a book. Exercise. Engage in something that will stop your thoughts from turning to sexual matters. This is easier said than done, but distraction can work wonders..

I don't think you'll be able to rid yourself of it completely. Our sexual desires are hardwired into us, and bodies, espeicially the bodies of teenagers, often get turned on against their owner's will. I think that if you're dedicated to not acting on your desires, and if you're not going to start any concrete relationships until marriage or engage in sexual acts, it's probably okay to slip up once in a while. I have a friend who is deeply religious, and he spent his adolescense tormenting himself about having sexual desires. Nothing he tried stopped them from existing, the repression only amplified them. It's like how when you go on a diet, all you can think about is eating junk food. Now that my friend is older, he accepts that his sexual feelings exist, but he knows that he won't engage in them until he's married. He's much, much happier for it, and I'm really proud of him.

[Anyaa]

Wow, thanks for the detailed post

I guess a Muslim adult or a therapist would be a good idea ... not anyone I already know though, lol, that`d be too awkward :/

I don`t wanna actually rid myself of sexual desires ... I think love is beautiful thing and I hope to be loved one day, and to become a mother, etc ...

It`d be great to get rid of this fetish however, coz there`s no way to avoid sneezing, so it`s like I got no control over when/where my sexual desires are `turned on`.

Thanks again for understanding ... so far, everyone on here seems to be great

[•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•]

Hi, thank you for trusting us with this problem. I'm a deist, and I don't think your beliefs are silly either. I thought of something interesting to think about. Your religion doesn't allow for you to feel sexual attraction for a person, yes. But have you ever thought about it this way: that you may feel an attraction not for a person at all, but for an action itself? And does that have any implications for you religiously? To be attracted to an action and not the person committing the action? I am not very knowledgeable about your religion, so many many pardons are begged if this question or line of thought is in any way offensive or assuming.

[Anyaa]

Hey, wow, I never thought of it that way ...

It`s true ; there`s people I`d NEVER look at twice if it wasn`t for their sneezing

[Pearlised]

Christian here (because everyone's stating their religion )

I think that because you're young and have your mind transfixed on the fetish then it's a lot 'worse' right now, but that's ok because that's how I was like g123 said, the fetish waxes and wanes, there are a lot of topics on here asking if it's normal. So if you just put it out of your mind right now you might find it easier to deal with, take a break from the forum maybe (welcome by the way! )

I don't think you can get rid of it, and just remember it is a part of you, like your fingers. Maybe if you tried to accept it instead of fight it, it could be a little easier. Everyone's quirks are what's made them unique, but I understand not having a quirk you particularly enjoy too.

Just understand its perfectly normal to have these desires, even if your religion says not to. Speaking to someone is a good idea and they might be able to tell you how to keep your mind otherwise occupied.

Hope you get on ok! xx

[Anyaa]

Thanks !

[Deadsh0t]

I know our belief systems are very different, since I follow the Aesir (Norse Pagan) faith, but I have to say, your dedication to your beliefs is incredibly admirable.

I think there's a difference, as has been stated before, between feeling something, and acting on it. Sure, you feel those things, but your choice not to act upon them shows your strength and loyalty to your faith. You can't help what you feel, and I'm sorry to tell you that it's going to be very difficult for you to get rid of your fetishy feelings entirely since they are indeed hardwired into your brain.

But what you can do is choose not to act on them. As has been said, you could always deliberately distract yourself whenever you start to think about your fetish. I know that'll be very difficult at your age, but just think, that when you get married, you might have a wonderful,indulgent husband who you can explore your fetish with. But in the mean time, try not to worry about it too much.

I guess a Muslim adult or a therapist would be a good idea ... not anyone I already know though, lol, that`d be too awkward :/

Perhaps you could just try talking about it generally, to avoid the awkwardness? You could start the conversation like "A friend of mine is worried about the feelings they're having, and they've come to me for advice, what should I tell them?"/ That way, the person you're talking to doesn't even need to know anything personal about you.

I hope this helps.

[Anyaa]

Thanks PixieRagamuffin

I know I`m young and have only recently discovered the community of sneeze fetishists, but (I hope this doesn`t sound extremely judgemental), as sneezing is kind of anywhere &+ everywhere ; it seems like those with a sneezing fetish can end up every so slightly sexually obsessed ?

Like I`m guessing a lot of people on here spend a considerable amount of time listening to those sneezing videos on YouTube ... which might be the equivalent of pornography for us as I`m guessing it produces similar effects

And I`m sure most people on here have heard of people having pornography addictions ...

Or at least you might agree that those with a sneezing fetish get `turned on` much more often that those without a sneezing fetish ?

That`s what I`m mostly worried about ... so I`m hoping to `fix-up` while I`m still young, coz otherwise it`ll be harder when I`m older.