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Sneeze Fetish Forum

Small Haikyuu! Ficlets


funinthesun

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YO LONG TIME NO SEE!

I actually have no idea how many of you guys are into Haikyuu!! but I wrote these things for you and they're not quite fics, but not quite drabbles but they're like one-shots idk i have tiny little writing ideas sometimes. So here you go! Let me know if you want more. Btw this makes more sense if you've seen the anime because idk i try to match sneeze style to personality.

Kuroo Tetsurou/Kenma Kozume(cold)

Kenma hated winter. More specifically, he hated the cold, and he hated circumstances that forced him to be out in it. And he hated being sick. And he especially hated anything (or anyone) that made him go out in the wintry cold weather while he was sick. Which meant that right now, he hated Kuroo Tetsurou and his goddamn insomnia. Despite his anger, Kenma couldn’t help but be a little bit worried about his friend. Kuroo, for whatever reason, couldn’t seem to get much more than 4 hours of sleep on a regular basis. Which, unhealthy as it might be, worked for him. However, sometimes his sleep clock just quit on him and he went days without getting any sleep whatsoever.

Which was why Kenma was walking across campus with his head full of the cold from hell and his bag full of clothes for the weekend.

Kuroo had better at least have tissues.

Kenma sniffled miserably, still plodding steadily toward his destination across the campus, Kuroo's dorm. Really, he should have told his friend "im sorry, but i feel like shit and im not coming." But no. No he had put on his jacket headed out, gratefully taking a mask from the punks who handed out pamphlets and helpful knickknacks on the corner and started making his way towards his distressed friend. The frigid air wasnt doing anything to help his condition, though. In fact, Kenma mused as his nose began to prickle and itch, it seemed to be magnifying his discomfort.

HhYEHtshh

Kenma instinctively reached up to cover his face, and wipe his nose, before remembering that he was wearing the mask. He Could feel the thin film of moisture coating the inside of the mask, and settling on his face. Disgusting. As an added bonus to feeling downright infected, his nose was now running freely, and he had to sniff like crazy just to keep the snot from leaking right down his face. Which meant that he was sniffling more cold air into his (increasingly itchy and illness stricken) nostrils, which in turn increased the frequency of the symptoms he was desperately trying not to exhibit. Most noteably and disgustingly, Kenma couldn't seem to stop sneezing.

Cold gust of air moved his scarf away from his neck.

yhkshhhu

His nose ran.

Haah....hahhh......yeTCHSHSHu ...hyietshhhiew….

Kenma had to try very hard not to just turn around, go home, and curl up, so that he could sneeze and suffer anywhere but in the public, in the cold, in the winter. He had to remind himself repeatedly and forcefully that he was traveling to help a friend in need, and that the friend in question wouldn't have even asked him unless he really really needed help.

hyetshchshu

Kuroo had better be really fuckin sleep deprived, or Kenma was gonna make sure he caught this cold.

By the time Kenma made it to Kuroo's door he was fighting off a sneeze every other minute, and his nose felt like it might be full of glue or something, instead of any actual bodily fluid.

Disgusting.

Kuroo looked pretty awful when he opened the door. Bags under his eyes, unfocused gaze, swaying on the spot, shaking a bit, the whole works. Literally every symptom in the Wikipedia page for “Sleep Deprivation” was staring Kenma straight in the face and motioning him inside.

“You look like shit,” Kenma muttered, letting himself into his best friend’s dorm. His voice crackled and just generally sounded sick. Gross. No. Ew. Stop.

Kenma dropped his bag in Kuroo’s room and made straight for the bathroom. Time to clean up. Make himself look (and maybe even sound) a little less like he was dying of the plague. His friend moved about the room listlessly, going through the general motions of making your room ready for a guest to be sleeping in it, but not really doing anything that Kenma could see. He just seemed to be rearranging things. How long had he been awake? He looked like a zombie shambling around like that.

As it turned out, his snot really had turned to glue or something, because all attempts to dislodge it by blowing only resulted in the urge to sneeze, and a throbbing sensation in his temples. Kenma was good and properly stuffed up. And it seemed like there was nothing he could do about it. Maybe….

Kenma brushed the edge of a tissue against the underside of his nose. The result was almost immediate, taking him by surprise.

chshhh…..tshhh…...yehtchshhh…..hyih-chshhht…..yEH-tchhhu…….hyeh...ah….heh-heh-heh-HYE-tCHSCHSHHHIEW

What the hell even was this situation?? He was sick and only getting worse, and there was a sleep deprived insomniac cat-person outside that door who would probably die or something like that if he didn’t sleep soon. So Kenma put himself back together, wiped his face and hands, washed away all the germs, covered his infection spewing orifices with his mask and opened the door to Kuroo’s room.

Of course, as soon as he tried to exit the bathroom, his nose decided to have a little fun with him. and of course Kuroo would be standing rightthere.

hyah-KTCHSCHSHHuh

The super unnerving thing was how Kuroo didn’t move afterward. He just kind of stood there, looking at Kenma with a mixture of confusion, worry, accusation, and exasperation. Which, he had to hand it to the guy, Kenma had never actually seen combined on a human face before. It made Kuroo look like a confused and offended puppy. Kinda cute, but kinda made him feel super guilty for no reason. Kenma sniffed forcefully.

"You're so sick," Kuroo murmured.

Yeah no shit.

"Are you ok, Cat?"

Kenma didn't answer his question. Pet names were a low blow.

"Get id bed, jerk."

Kuroo and Kenma again

yuhshchoo-

Kuroo sneezed for the fourth time that morning.

Kenma kicked his foot without looking up from his game.

“Go home already.”

He sniffled, trying to be quiet, but he knew that the woman sitting next to them on the train was already giving him dirty looks. Feh. Everyone was overreacting. He wasn’t sick he was obviously just allergic to something. Yes. Something on this train was giving him a reaction. Obviously.

Kenma kicked him again.

“You’re that eager to be rid of me,” Kuroo chuckled. “Well you won’t-”

huh-SHCHIEW

Kenma didn’t even let him finish his sentence before dragging him off the train.

Hajime Iwaizumi and Oikawa Tooru

“Ihhhhh- ih...Iwah-ah-”

ah!CHSHCH

Ewwww, that hadn’t sounded cute at all. Oikawa moved his phone further away from his face to take care of the non-cute contents of his nasal passages. Iwa-chan didn’t need to hear that. When he was finished blowing, he brought the phone back to his ear.

“Sorry Iwa-chaaad!” Oikawa opened his mouth to explain himself, but Iwaizumi cut him off.

“I’ll tell coach you’re not coming,” He said. “Take care-”

“WAIT! You cad’t tell hib I have ahaaah- alluh….allerghhhiih-”

hih’TSHCHhh

“I can’t tell him you have what, now?” He was teasing Oikawa now. “I can’t tell coach you have allergies??”

“No! You cad’t! Because it’s so not cute Iwa-chad.”

Oikawa could practically hear his friend rolling his eyes.

“Please, Iwa-chad.” Oh no. Not again. Oikawa’s nose started twitching. “Just beehhhh- just bake sobe- sobethigg…..”

“I’ll tell him you’re skipping to go on a date, happy?”

hhaKSHCHSHh

Oikawa sighed.

“Thagk you Iwa-chaad.”

He had already hung up.

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Holy shit I marathoned this anime last night and I loved all of it!! These are so good and completely in character I love it <3

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*FLAILING* I don't watch the anime but somehow I love the characters and you write them very well! This is so satisfying to read ^^

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Aw, these were really cute - especially the Kuroo/Kenma ones!

I went through a huge Haikyuu! phase last summer. I only watched the anime though. biggrin.png

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SO adorable and cute and I can't even begin to describe how much i want to squee to death at these tiny ficlets. I think Kenma would be who I'd want to see sneeze the most out of all Haikyuu characters, just because he's so quiet and introverted. And his sneezes match his personality perfectly! Aww, and Oikawa reaction to having allergies, I can just imagine Kageyama offering him tissues all the time :P :P

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