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You'll Never Get Away (Dean Martin/Jerry Lewis)


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A/N: Okay, so, hi! It's been a while since I've posted, and as usual, my fandom is obscure and much older than I am. :B Basically I'm super into the comedic duo of Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis, and I really wanted a cute Jerry sickfic because... What can I say? Tall, dorky goofballs are attractive <3

This is in some sort of alternate universe, maybe? Or it could be thought of as a sketch. Either way, I really wanted to write some of them together. I'm only posting the first part of it for now. There's more, but I'll see what you guys think first. I hope you enjoy!


A shirtless Dean Martin emerged from the bathroom of the hotel he was sharing with his partner Jerry, a towel draped around his neck. He sat down on the side of the bed, scrubbing at his hair with the towel in attempt to dry it. A quick glance at the clock told him what time it was; Ten minutes to rehersal, and 40 to showtime. He was just wondering where his partner was in his morning ritual, when his answer came from behind him.

"Heh-- Heh-ihh-- ISHhchIEW!"

Dean nearly yelped in surprise, but composed himself. "God bless you!" He turned around and pulled the top down from the mass of blankets that had just sneezed, and turned back around. "And Good morning."

"Thadks..." A bleary-eyed Jerry Lewis looked up at the back side of the other half of the duo before pulling the blankets promptly back up over his head.

"Why aren't you out of bed yet?" He asked, standing up. "Get up and get yourself ready, we leave in 10." After there was no response from his partner, the crooner leaned over him, pulling the blankets down again. "C'mon Jerr--" He caught sight of Jerry and his tone changed immediately. "You look awful."

"Thadks Deedo, you always kdow just whad to say to flatter be."

Dean halfheartedly rolled his eyes. He knew Jerry wasn't an early riser and that could sometimes lead to snippiness. He also knew that his partner would probably use any excuse to get out of waking up so early. "What's the matter with you?"

"Whadya bean 'what's the batter with be'?"

"What do you mean, 'what do I mean what's the matter with you'?" Dean said, "You look like you got hit by a truck!"

"Yeah, and I feel like it, too."

"Alright, alright." Dean sat back beside his partner. "What's wrong for real?"

"By head hurts." So he was going with playing sick.

"It's killing me, too. Now get up."

"Hey!" Jerry whined. "That'd dot fair! I don'd feel good and you're picking on be! Sobe kinda friend you are!" Just then a tickle snuck it's way into Jerry's nose. "Heh... Hehg'ShhhIEW! EkG'ngSHHh!" He sniffed stuffily and rubbed his eyes, groaning miserably.

Dean raised an eyebrow. "You really don't feel well?"

Jerry shook his head. "By throat hurts and I feel all sduffed ub."

The older man placed the palm of his large hand on his friend's forehead, his eyebrows raising. "Hmm, you do feel warm. I'll call Dick and tell him you can't make it in today. Dunno how we'll do the show with just me--" Dean was suddenly cut off.

"Wait a bidute! Y-You're dot godda leave be here all alode, are you Deed?"

"Well, of course I have to! What-- Are they gonna put on a show by themselves? The show wouldn't be very funny, or very long, without the two main stars." He corrected himself, "Or at least one of them." He turned back to his friend and tossed him a clean handkerchief from their laundry pile. "And blow your nose, you sound like somebody crammed an entire person up there." Jerry took the hanky gratefully and blew into it forcefully, the sound somewhat resembling a trumpet's blast. The blow must've loosened something up because he then sneezed again, making a low whine.

Dean sighed as he picked a shirt up from the pile and put it on. "Look, I'll talk to Dick and see what we can work out. In the meantime, Aspirin is in the bathroom cabinet, handkerchiefs are in the pile, and," he put extra emphasis on this part, "Don't go anywhere. I'll eb back as soon as I can."

Jerry looked up sadly at Dean, eyes pouting, pouty lip with the mouth open, because his nose was still too stuffy to breathe from properly, but nodded anyways. "Okay Deed..." The Crooner ruffled his friend's hair and left the Hotel. About halfway to the studio, though, he started to feel guilty about leaving his sick friend.


TBC? (:

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Awww, I like this too! If you want, you should continue!! Poor Jerry! Although I'm loving Dean's teasing haha! <3

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