Passing on the fetish?

[Snowydays]

So my best friend is my cousin, it sounds lame but she's the best friend ever. She's been stuck with me since I was born since my family was a little wealthier than hers and we practically spoiled her!! So she's kinda like a sister and naturally, she grew up with me. Like a majority of the community, I used to always make our characters in our little games sick or sneeze (I actually had a character who had a 'forever cold').

So, she noticed how I constantly had sick characters and one day..I told her about the fetish. I was 11 and she was 13. We were talking about boys and I don't know where the courage came from but I told her. I had already known about the forum. To quote, i said, "umm..I kinda..find it cute when someone is sick..and specifically sneezes.." She looked curious and was like, "oh is it like a turn on or something?? cause that's pretty cool." I just nodded in embarrassment and she was like, "I already knew. It's cool though!"

So now we live in separate countries because I moved to Ireland but we always Skype, stream movies together and text. We love to RP too! And she encourages that I make my characters sneeze and stuff, which makes me a bit shy at first but now it's fine. So recently she wanted to RP Kiliel, and she prefers playing as female characters so she played tauriel and she actually requested me to make kili sneezy.

She then told me that she thinks it's really cute how kili has a smaller nose but probably has harsh sneezes. She told me she finds it very cute. She's never really cared about the fetish but now she loves doing the care taking bit and is finding sneezing interesting. She even sent me a sneezefic from the forum!! With the caption "AHH THE SNEEZING AND KILI IS SO CUTE" (Btw, it was I Know You by TaurielRiver, which is one of my favourite fics of all time!! <33)

So, basically, do you think she had the fetish all along or the fetish somehow transferred to her? Is this even possible?? I may be just looking into it too much, but it's a very interesting topic! Has anything like this ever happened to you guys??

[bloom]

I think that a lot of times people take an interest in sneezing when somebody close to them (usually an SO, I think) has it and discusses it with them or indulges in it a lot, so that's not too unusual. That said, I doubt very strongly she's actually developed the fetish itself - to be crude, there's a huge difference between finding something cute enough to read about it and actually getting off on it.

Sexuality (and many other aspects of life) are very malleable at a young age. That doesn't mean the experiences one has at a young age aren't important or anything, but it does mean sometimes they can be fleeting. I bet in five years if you asked her, her interest in sneezing will have waned considerably. The fetish is pretty hard-wired and I think it's pretty much a "have it or don't" type of thing.

[Snowydays]

I think that a lot of times people take an interest in sneezing when somebody close to them (usually an SO, I think) has it and discusses it with them or indulges in it a lot, so that's not too unusual. That said, I doubt very strongly she's actually developed the fetish itself - to be crude, there's a huge difference between finding something cute enough to read about it and actually getting off on it.

Sexuality (and many other aspects of life) are very malleable at a young age. That doesn't mean the experiences one has at a young age aren't important or anything, but it does mean sometimes they can be fleeting. I bet in five years if you asked her, her interest in sneezing will have waned considerably. The fetish is pretty hard-wired and I think it's pretty much a "have it or don't" type of thing.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!! I see what you mean, she is between the ages of 15-19 (keeping it anonymous for the sake of privacy) and I guess she is quite young. I suppose she will get over it in time, but for now it's great that I have someone to talk to about it

[Heathcliff]

I agree with Junia. It's a shame, because sometimes it's a nice thought that we could 'give' the fetish to someone we're close to- but I don't personally believe it is possible to pick up a true fetish from someone else. You've either had it forever, or you don't really have it at all.

Edit: Of course, that doesn't make it any less sweet that she wants to join in and comment on something she knows you like. It is probably more of a testament to how she likes you, rather than any fetish she has. And isn't that a nice thing?

Edited August 29, 2015 by Heathcliff

[Garnet]

I generally agree with Junia. There have been numerous instances in the community about SO's or friends "catching" the fetish but I'm not sure to the extent I believe that. That said, it certainly is nice when people are indulgent of our whims and/or empathize to that sort of degree!

I've had friends and RP partners who I've told about it, some were super enthusiastic about taking things in that direction, at their own suggestion, and others were just receptive but uninterested. That said, I have also met and befriended people outside the community who ended up having the fetish. We weren't particularly close so I doubt they would have lied to me about it (and one of them ended up joining the community later anyway) so I suppose it's technically possible? Just unlikely.

It sounds like you guys have a great bond, though, so I'd definitely just enjoy it for what it is!

[sneeze_me]

(I actually had a character who had a 'forever cold').

lolooooool

Just trying to imagine that in real life...

Edited August 29, 2015 by Joal 555
fixed quote

[Sawyer]

There have been numerous instances in the community about SO's or friends "catching" the fetish but I'm not sure to the extent I believe that.

I think they're just being conditioned. Like, they know that sneezing is sexual to their partner, so they associate it with sex.

Sneezing turns their partner on, which turns them on (or leads to activities that turn them on)... so eventually, they start to see sneezing as something that will lead to them being turned on.

Definitely not the same as having the fetish, and I'm sure that if they ever broke up and started dating somebody who didn't have it, the conditioning would be undone. With people like us, though, it's likely that nothing short of traumatic aversion therapy could take the fetish away for good!

[Snowydays]

I agree with Junia. It's a shame, because sometimes it's a nice thought that we could 'give' the fetish to someone we're close to- but I don't personally believe it is possible to pick up a true fetish from someone else. You've either had it forever, or you don't really have it at all.

Edit: Of course, that doesn't make it any less sweet that she wants to join in and comment on something she knows you like. It is probably more of a testament to how she likes you, rather than any fetish she has. And isn't that a nice thing?

I generally agree with Junia. There have been numerous instances in the community about SO's or friends "catching" the fetish but I'm not sure to the extent I believe that. That said, it certainly is nice when people are indulgent of our whims and/or empathize to that sort of degree!

I've had friends and RP partners who I've told about it, some were super enthusiastic about taking things in that direction, at their own suggestion, and others were just receptive but uninterested. That said, I have also met and befriended people outside the community who ended up having the fetish. We weren't particularly close so I doubt they would have lied to me about it (and one of them ended up joining the community later anyway) so I suppose it's technically possible? Just unlikely.

It sounds like you guys have a great bond, though, so I'd definitely just enjoy it for what it is!

There have been numerous instances in the community about SO's or friends "catching" the fetish but I'm not sure to the extent I believe that.

I think they're just being conditioned. Like, they know that sneezing is sexual to their partner, so they associate it with sex.

Sneezing turns their partner on, which turns them on (or leads to activities that turn them on)... so eventually, they start to see sneezing as something that will lead to them being turned on.

Definitely not the same as having the fetish, and I'm sure that if they ever broke up and started dating somebody who didn't have it, the conditioning would be undone. With people like us, though, it's likely that nothing short of traumatic aversion therapy could take the fetish away for good!

Thanks for sharing your thoughts you guys!! (>^-^)> I agree with all your points now that it's clear to me I'm actually just starting to learn more about all about myself and no one really explains these things to me It's great to learn things about the fetish, so thanks you guys!!

[Snowydays]

(I actually had a character who had a 'forever cold').

lolooooool

Just trying to imagine that in real life...

It would be wonderful wouldn't it <33 xD

[sneeze_me]

[TaurielRiver]

Aww aw! Your best friend sounds absolutely lovely, so so awesome that you could share the fetish with her and she’s so accepting and open about talking about it/RPing with it! Honestly that sounds like the sweetest thing ever.

I have friends who enjoy hurt/comfort, and I can imagine that sneezing may not be a big leap for some to find cute, since illness and caretaking are already H/C themes. There have definitely been occasions in the past where I’ve found something a lot more adorable once someone has written about it in a way I liked!

And thank youu for such a high compliment, aaaaa, so much warm and fuzzy from reading that, I am honoured! :3 :heart:

[Snowydays]

Aww aw! Your best friend sounds absolutely lovely, so so awesome that you could share the fetish with her and she’s so accepting and open about talking about it/RPing with it! Honestly that sounds like the sweetest thing ever.

I have friends who enjoy hurt/comfort, and I can imagine that sneezing may not be a big leap for some to find cute, since illness and caretaking are already H/C themes. There have definitely been occasions in the past where I’ve found something a lot more adorable once someone has written about it in a way I liked!

And thank youu for such a high compliment, aaaaa, so much warm and fuzzy from reading that, I am honoured! :3 :heart:

She is the sweetest thing ever!! <3 I decided to read past RP messages and found that she is in fact a h/c lover. She loves being on the care taking side it seems; she loves to send inspirational hipster posts xD

And you are welcome!! Your writing is extremely wonderful and she loves it a lot too, she says stuff like "this is where I find all my info on silvan elves" haha <33 I'm a sucker for romance and sappy friendships ! ^-^

[Mr. Black Cherry Berry Tea]

There have been numerous instances in the community about SO's or friends "catching" the fetish but I'm not sure to the extent I believe that.

I think they're just being conditioned. Like, they know that sneezing is sexual to their partner, so they associate it with sex.

Sneezing turns their partner on, which turns them on (or leads to activities that turn them on)... so eventually, they start to see sneezing as something that will lead to them being turned on.

Definitely not the same as having the fetish, and I'm sure that if they ever broke up and started dating somebody who didn't have it, the conditioning would be undone. With people like us, though, it's likely that nothing short of traumatic aversion therapy could take the fetish away for good!

Right, there was an old story like that on serotica (or not exactly the same but similar). It makes sense that partners begin to associate sneezing with arousal, but I bet if you asked them to break down what they like about a sneeze or what kinds of sneezes they like or etc., etc., the way people do on this forum all the time, they probably wouldn't have nearly as much to say as a "true" fetishist. I guess for them it's more of a two-step process (sneezing reminds me of these experiences I've had which reminds me of being turned on) whereas for people with the fetish is more of a one-step process (sneezing turns me on). But I could definitely be wrong about that--people experience the fetish in a lot of different ways. But yes! Regardless it is wonderful to have someone accepting and someone who can understand how sneezing makes you feel and share conversation with you about it, even if her experience is not exactly the same.