Describe A Movie Badly

[smmoct3]

The Ring: The reason why most of us don't use VHS tapes anymore.

Heathers: Some teen angst bullshit happens and you think "how many times is this going to happen" but it's really good don't worry

The Wizard of Oz: A young girl named Dorothy travels down a yellow brick road. She meets some older men and they all instantly become best friends. She has to go home and shit. It's a classic!

 

Edited August 13, 2016 by smmoct3
spelling lol oops

[FadedRose]

Gotta jump in here with reality tv 

The Bachelor: Guy kisses 26 different girls and does the dirty with three of them, and then picks the one he liked it with most to marry.

[Spoo]

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory: Weird candy maker invites kids and their parents over for a trippy contest. 

[Rook]

Power rangers Bad ass teens kick butt and learn the power of friendship 

[Enkidom]

Ivy League college really wishes it hadn't pulled the plug on one of its postdoc projects so soon. Loses prestige as former employees save city from lady dressed as eighties singer just out of a bubble bath and her two big dogs. (Ghostbusters, original)

Actors play second fiddle to car that appears in all of 15 minutes of the film (Mad Max)

He REALLY should have got gas at the last service station. (Mad Max 2)

[Juto]

Pride and Prejudice (1995 miniseries): It's about a guy in a cravat who at one point wears a wet shirt and realises that the woman who was not handsome enough to tempt him, was actually quite nice... When her mum wasn't around. 

Prison Break: Dude with blueprints on his chest goes to jail to break out... To get back in... To break out... To go to another prison... To break out... And then he dies. 

West Side Story: Clash of two gangs... "This town isn't big enough for both of us"... *pirouettes away threateningly* 

Edited August 13, 2016 by Juto

[Chanel_no5]

Cujo: Bat bites dog, then dog bites a lot of people.

Cinderella: Girl goes nuts because she can't go to one party.

Waterworld: The world is covered in water, only bad guys smoke, and a kid has a weird map tattoo. Everybody looks constantly sweaty, which is weird because there's water everywhere to wash in.

The Shining: Janitor plays a game of hide and seek with his family.

Calendar Girls: A bunch of older women desperate to strip in front of the camera.

Shawshank Redemption: Guy with a thing for pinup girls escapes from prison, at least according to his story-telling friend.

And a bunch of TV shows, then...

The Golden Girls: Four older women; the slut, the bore, the dumb and the offensive, eat cheesecake and talk about men.

Big Love: A Mormon guy is married to three women who can't get along. 

Absolutely Fabulous: A future depiction of Lindsay and Paris, set in England.

 

 

 

 

[Bondi]

Zardoz - Flying stone head explains that the gun is good and the penis is evil, then a middle age Sean Connery in a speedo intercepts said head, flies around in it to the land of immortals, who proceed to study him and argue about what they should do with him.

Bladerunner - Deckard the bladerunner hunts down four replicants.

Game of Thrones - A bunch of assholes and maybe a few decent people fight over who should be king.

[Sitruuna]

War of the dead: people shoot at things that are dead

[guynextdoor]

This is fun

-Lord of the Rings: Lilliputians carrying bling-bling

 

Red Riding Hood: Granddaugther visiting grandmother

[Arty]

Texas Chainsaw Massacre: A man who wears people's faces and his band of fucked up family members torture a group of dumb teens that go to the scary, barren, big house. Usually one has a weird connection with the house*

House of 1000 Corpses: see above...though it's with fucked up clowns, etc...*

*Rule number Every last one* Do not pick up the obvious deranged Hitchhiker nor let the creepy clown man lead you and your friends some where*

[Bondi]

So another TV show.....

Oz - the prison show that will make you never ever ever want to go to prison.

[Big Bear]

Jaws:  Local police chief confronts a remorseless killer at sea and requests a larger aquatic vehicle from his friend.

[Rook]

1 minute ago, The Corporate Enforcer said:

Jaws:  Local police chief confronts a remorseless killer at sea and requests a larger aquatic vehicle from his friend.

OMFG ROFL 

[Bondi]

2001 - landscape, rogue AI, acid trip

[MoonDuck]

Newsies: Newspaper price goes up a few cents, newsboys strike. 

Wicked: A nice green lady wants to find a wizard but things go wrong and everyone wants her dead. 

[Sitruuna]

Hostel: it's about human trafficking

[Kaze Wo Hiku]

Pride and Predjudice: waiting 6 hours to see Colin Firth smile.

[gingerdean]

Mrs. Doubtfire- divorced dad dresses as an old woman so he can see his kids more often, and stalks his ex-wife in the process

 

The Shining - A guy goes crazy in a creepy hotel and tries to kill his family with an axe, but freezes to death in a maze instead

 

Dirty Dancing: Patrick Swayze dances and sweats a lot. Nothing else of any importance happens, but here is the rest anyway...He teaches this girl to dance, and he is adamant that nobody puts her in a corner.  They work really hard to do this awkward, weird-looking "lift" move that totally throws off the rhythm of the entire dance routine. But she finally doesn't fall, so yay.

Edited August 15, 2016 by gingerdean
fixed something

[Rook]

On 8/13/2016 at 3:39 PM, The Corporate Enforcer said:

Macbeth:

Guy goes batshitt crazy and tries to kill everyone

[MaiMai]

Guardians of the Galaxy: Everyone is obsessed with an orb, there's a talking raccoon, a tree, a green girl and some dude. I'm watching it right now and I have no clue what's happening. If there is a plot it escapeth me.

Inception: People float and bounce against ceilings. Dreamy af. Also murder is commited.

[black_mage]

night of the living dead:
There's a group of people inside a house. Another group is having trouble getting in.

Dawn of the dead (original)
There's an epidemic of some sort, then people start goofing around inside a mall.

[black_mage]

Here's another one for Dawn of the dead:

A small group of people tries to prevent everyone else from eating. Hilarity and chaos ensue.

Sorry, these are propabbly terrible but this is too much fun

[ladytiscot]

1 hour ago, Anatoli said:

Here's another one for Dawn of the dead:

A small group of people tries to prevent everyone else from eating. Hilarity and chaos ensue.

Sorry, these are propabbly terrible but this is too much fun

No, these are awesome! 

Megamind: Bad guy is good guy and good guy is a flake.

Megamind: You should really check references before hiring a sidekick.

Dead Alive: 700 gallons of fake blood. Enough said.

Hellraiser (original): Bizarre rubix cube makes messed-up monsters. 

Wolf (1994): Jack Nicholson is a werewolf. 

Wolf (1994): Jack Nicholson tries to act like a pushover. Doesn't work out well for anyone.

Wolf (1994) (I love this movie, okay?): Jack Nicholson and Michelle Pfeiffer are hot werewolf lovers.  

Tusk: What happens when less-than-lucid Canadians who don't sleep make a movie. 

Tusk: The Human Centipede meets Frankenstein in walrus form.

(This is SO MUCH FUN)

When A Stranger Calls: Don't answer.

Are You in the House Alone?: You will never look at Dennis Quaid the same way again.

Amusement: Creepy kid collects clowns (bonus points for alliteration?!)

Mutants (2009): Tragic French zombie film.

Mutants (2009): Terminal illness zombie allegory. 

(I CAN'T STOP. SOMEBODY HELP ME.)

The Human Centipede: That movie you wish you'd never seen.

I might have more later.... I'm thoroughly enjoying myself...

 

[riyona_ebooks]

Royally fucked movie adaption of a popular video game series. (Super Mario Bros. movie)

Edited August 28, 2016 by Rinny