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Showing exact age


the man who loved beer

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Recently, I've been thinking a lot about how the forum staff can improve the way that its younger members are treated. Obviously, debates have already been had about whether displaying one's age ought to be compulsory (which it should, in my opinion) and reforms have been made.

What I would suggest, though, is that right now a small but potentially extremely beneficial change would be to remove the "13-17" age range and require all members within this range to display their actual ages. I say this because, having joined the forum at 13, I can tell you that the difference between these two ages is enormous, and 13-to-17-year-olds should absolutely not be grouped together for the safety of the youngest members.

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I agree that 13-17 is not optimal because there can be a huge difference between the ages (and what would be an appropriate way to interact with these members) but I don't supprt the idea of making it compulsory for anyone to show their exact age. Especially not the younger members who might possibly become an easy target for certain kinds of people. I don't think there really is a good solution for this because each option has it's down sides.

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We had a thread similar to this a little over a year ago (link), and what ended up happening was the implementation of the age range system (which I believe made everything worse, because it didn't address the problem that was being talked about at all, still allowed the 'not telling' option, and lumped in together - like you said - 13 year olds with 17 year olds).

The problem is, at its core, allowing children to participate in an adult-oriented sexual fetish site, and I'm not trying to open that can of worms because I know it won't lead anywhere, but because of that, I don't think there's a particularly tidy solution to this. I agree with you entirely that 13 year olds and 17 year olds are entirely different kettles of fish and I'm very uncomfortable with them being lumped together as well, but at this point, I'm not sure what to do.

The pros are that it would make it crystal clear, at a glance, exactly how old a teenager is, allowing posters to tailor their interactions with them better. I personally am definitely more comfortable discussing more adult (not sexual, just more mature) issues with a 17 year old present than a 13 year old. It would also make it more clear even between teenagers. I think the potential for abuse between older teens and young one is also a legitimate concern when you lump all of them together, in a "hey we're both teens so it's totally cool if we trade wavs and discuss sexual stuff together" way. That's not something that can exactly be policed, but I think it's a concern, at least.

On the flip side, like Sitruuna says, it makes it extremely easy for sexual predators to know who is likely naive enough to target. This is the only con I can think of, but it's a pretty huge one.

Overall I err on the side of thinking that it should be compulsory for people to list their age ranges at least (seriously, the 'not telling' option gives teens no indication of whether or not they're being taken advantage of by a scummy adult, of which there are plenty in this community, it's really detrimental).

We could further split the teens' age ranges into something like 13-15 and 16-17, maybe? As a middle ground compromise? That would be something, at least.

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34 minutes ago, Junia said:

We could further split the teens' age ranges into something like 13-15 and 16-17, maybe? As a middle ground compromise? That would be something, at least.

This is a great idea. I see both sides of the argument but I really think this suggestion is the best way to go for everyone. 

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6 hours ago, LL said:

Recently, I've been thinking a lot about how the forum staff can improve the way that its younger members are treated

 

As an aside, I can confirm that this topic is regularly revisited by the staff and indeed we have an ongoing Staff Board thread from the last few weeks which has already led to the implementation of two new measures (one very minor and one of more consequence) that we hope will make newer young members more aware of safety issues on the internet in general and on the forum in particular.

Further ideas have been raised and continue to be discussed and there may be additional measures introduced in due course.

 

 

 

 

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