Unexpected Champions (Secret Santa for gryffin!)

[Via]

It took a bit longer than I would've liked, but here's my submission for Secret Santa 2017! Huge, huge thanks to Junia for giving me an excuse to finally come out of near-lurkerdom and flex my writing muscles again, and to @gryffin for giving me the chance to write lots of male sneezing, something I don't do nearly as often as I should. Hopefully this is a sign of a lot more fetish-related productivity to come, but for now, I hope you all enjoy the story and have a happy new year! 

 

Unexpected Champions

"Who's number one?"

"We're number one!"

"Who's number one?"

"WE'RE NUMBER ONE!"

 

Whoops and cheers erupted from the fifteen young men assembled in front of the backyard pool, their voices echoing through the humid late-summer air. Andy Davis was, of course, the loudest among them. His yell of victory split the raucous chorus and resounded on its own, a rich tenor peal the rest of the boys couldn't hope to match. Andy didn't have the fastest times, or the best technique, but he was the captain, trip organizer, and undisputed heart and soul of the Mornington University swim team. Tall, muscled, and bright-eyed, with his brown hair cut in a curly mop that spilled over his forehead, Andy oozed that sort of mysterious, amicable confidence that drew attention and admiration from just about everyone. Fans would cheer him from the bleachers, girls would smirk and titter as they saw him pass in the hall, but he didn't so much bask in the attention as let it wash over him, sliding off his well-defined shoulders and casting a buttery trail in his wake. That was the thing about Andy Davis: for all his joking and posturing, he cared deeply about both the sport and his team, and adamantly (sometimes bullheadedly) refused to let anything else become more important.

 

"State champs, baby!" he shouted, to another round of cheers. "This year, next year, all years!" In a single fluid motion, he yanked off his shirt, tossed it to the side, and executed a perfect running cannonball, sending a plume of water into the air to patter down on the tiled poolside. The cheers grew even louder as Andy resurfaced, grinning hugely, before his eyebrows twitched, his brow furrowed, and his broad nostrils gave a sudden, involuntary flare. Some of the boys laughed, waiting for the inevitable, and a few moments later, it came. Andy's eyes began to lid, his head tilting back as he bobbed above the surface of the water...

 

"Hhhhh...hhhHUHHH...HUUHHHEESSSCHOOOO!!!"

 

That was the other thing about Andy Davis: not only had he managed to become the local hero of Mornington U's aquatics division, but he'd done it in spite of a severe chlorine sensitivity... a sensitivity that had sent him into drawn-out fits of earsplitting sneezes before, after, and sometimes even during nearly every practice for his first few years on the team. With time, willpower, and medication, he'd managed to reduce it from a dealbreaker to a minor annoyance, but by then the 'Andy sneeze' had already become a long-running joke among his teammates. Comparisons to the pre-heat starting gun were frequent, and, if the reactions of crowd at their meets were anything to go by, less inaccurate than one might think. Medication and nose plugs usually stopped the brunt of the sneezes before they could start, but tonight was a party, and Andy hadn't seen the need for either.

 

"Whew, goddamn! What're you all waiting for?" he called, laughing and beckoning from the water. He was quickly joined by sandy-haired Brian, then Joe, then Hunter, each one attempting to out do the previous jumper's entry splash. Soon, at least half the team was in the pool, and with nearly every impact against the surface, Andy would loose another roaring "HUUUHHSSCHHHOOOOOO!!" His head would snap forward with every sneeze, the force of it practically catapulting him into the water each time before he recovered, utterly at ease. There were some laughs, some eye rolls, and some claps on the back, but the 'bless yous' were implied, not said: they'd realized long ago it just wasn't practical to pay respects to every single sneeze, and Andy himself had once called a now-infamous team-wide meeting to tell them to 'just skip it, goddamn! Save your breath to swim with'.

 

As the ripples and splashes settled, Andy's sneezing did too, leveling off at one or two explosions every few minutes or so. Once the other boys had had their fill of ribbing their captain as usual, the buzz of happy conversation quickly filled the whole backyard, inside the pool and out. Colin, the host, had even gotten a portable speaker set up on a deck chair, and soon the sounds of fist-pumping Top-40 hits mingled with the laughs and yells of fifteen glory-drunk college students. Coolers were brought out, red solo cups were filled, and as the sun began redden and dip below the horizon, the party began in earnest.

---

"I know, right? So I was juhh... just, ah, shit, hangon..." Andy held up a hand and sniffed loudly, eyes momentarily glazing over as his bare abs tensed, a prelude to yet another sneeze. As the sun had set and the temperature dropped, the pool had been abandoned in favor of patio chairs, food, alcohol, and story-swapping, but the scent of chlorine still lingered enough to drive a persistent tickle inside the captain's nose. "Hhhh...hhh-hhuuUHH..." He gasped, head tilting back as his entire body seemed to prepare for the release—someone more cynical might have accused him of playing his sneezes up, but the same could really be said for any aspect of Andy Davis. Everything about him, from his personality to his nose to his sneezes themselves, was utterly, unquestionably larger than life. He liked to joke that his own sneezes used to scare him, but with the way he embraced every sniff, hitch, and blast, anyone who knew him found it impossible to believe.

 

"HUHHH... h-hhHHH..." Andy's face twisted in an odd sort half-grimace, nostrils flaring wide, as if the sneeze was biding its time, debating whether to put him through another round of animated hitching or just barrel out of him and get it overwith. He raised a hand, rubbing at his nose, and the anticipation soon turned to irritation as he felt the itch fade but not disappear, lurking maddeningly at the very edge of his nose. "Augh, damnit!" He shook his head, laughing even as he continued to rub and massage his nose, trying to either coax the chlorine-induced tickle out or make it go away entirely. "It blueballed me! I thought for sure I was gonna... gonna... it'scomingbahh... hhhh... HUHHHH..."

 

"HAHHH-CHSSHHUHHH!!!" The sneeze echoed out across the backyard, sudden, desperate, and intensely forceful... and as it did, fourteen pairs of eyes widened in surprise. This sneeze easily rivaled Andy's in both power and volume, but it had come from a completely different source: Leo, the lithe, softspoken olive-skinned freshman who'd been sitting alone for most of the night. The nineteen-year-old was taking quick, unsteady breaths, his chest rising and falling as he gave in again to the sudden, vicious twinge of tickly irritation that had risen inside his nose: "HAAHHH-CSSHHHUUUHH!! AAAAHHH-CHHHSSHUUH!! Guh..." A dazed-sounding sniffle followed the unexpected triple, along with several a few incredulous laughs. Andy looked up, an expression of good-natured disbelief on his face as he felt his own urge to sneeze disappear out of sheer surprise.

 

"Uh, bless you, man!" he said, breaking his own rule for a moment out of reflexive politeness and concern. "You all right? Keep those up and you might give me a run for my money!" That got some smirks from the other boys, and even a slight smile from Leo, who opened his mouth to reply... only for his breath to catch and his nostrils to flare as another lingering "HAH- CCHSSSSSSSHUH!!" caught both him and Andy by surprise.

 

"Holy fuck!" Joe said, to murmurs of assent from the others. "You haven't been hiding a chlorine allergy from us, right? Last thing we need is Andy number two." That earned him a casual punch on the shoulder from Andy number one, which he took with a laugh. Leo, for his part, shook his head, rubbing a hand soothingly along his narrow, straight-bridged nose. For the moment, it seemed to work, at least enough to allow him a reply.

 

"It's not the water, I was fine when we were in the pool, but now it's like... my nose is prickling, and I keep having to...hhhhhh..." His nostrils flared, but a moment later, he managed to fight the urge to sneeze back, a faint, embarrassed flush coming over his face, just barely visible in the light from the backyard's external lights. "I don't really know what it is, but I think it's getting behh...hhhhhhHHAAHH-CSHHHUUUHH!!!" The sneeze didn't quite snap him over at the waist like Andy's, but the force behind it was easily apparent in the way it made his chest tense and his bare toes curl. He sniffled again, looking sheepish, and shrugged. "Or, uh, maybe not."

 

Another round of laughs followed that admission, Andy's the loudest among them. Conversation quickly picked back up, though it was now punctuated by both the occasional roaring "HUHHHEESSSCHHHOOO!!" or drawn-out, desperate "HAHH-CHHSHHHUH!!" At any other party, sneezes like that might have been cause for concern, or even annoyance—but MU Aquatics, they were practically background noise. Leo got some curious looks, but even those quickly tapered off as more drinks were consumed and the atmosphere got progressively rowdier but no less celebratory.

 

"Leo, my man! You want any?" Leo glanced up to see Andy standing by his deck chair, a trio of unopened beer cans clutched precariously in one hand. His face was slightly flushed, evidence that those drinks certainly wouldn't be his first of the night, but he was at least sober enough to pause at the other boy's hesitation. "Oh, shit! Have you never, uh—" Leo shook his head, and Andy gave a sage nod. "Right, right. I feel it, my dude! I feel it. Offer's still open! But I won't push it, all right? No pushing here. This is... this is a no-push zone." The laugh that followed made Leo a little less confident in Andy's sobriety, but he managed a smile nonetheless.

"Thanks. I, uh..." The freshman paused, half in deliberation, half to rub at his nose, which was becoming increasingly itchy with each passing second. "I'll take one!" he said, surprising even himself with the conviction in the words. He pointed to one of the cans at random, nodding as if to reassure himself. "Might as well, right?"

Andy's eyebrows rose. "You sure? Like, sure sure. No pressure, man. No pressure."

 

Leo nodded again, feeling suddenly self-conscious. "I can handle it," he said defensively. "Seriously, ihh... hhhhh-hhhH-HAAAAH-CHHSHHUUUHHH!!" He barely managed to angle the sneeze away from Andy, who hopped a half-foot back anyway in a surprising feat of reflexes for someone who'd had as many drinks as he did. "Snfff... I can handle it."

 

"All right!" Andy flashed him an infectious grin and plonked a can down on the arm of the chair. "Don't slam it all at once, all right? Take it slow." With a reassuring nod, he walked off to join another group of his teammates, leaving Leo to hesitantly pick up the can. It'll be fine, he thought, before steeling himself, cracking open the tab, and taking a swallow in one swift motion, trying not to give himself any more time for doubts.

 

The beer hit his mouth with a fizz and a sharp but not unpleasant tang of alcohol—but Leo barely noticed. The instant the can had opened, all his attention had immediately gone to his nose, which was prickling and twinging, as if all the bubbles and the bite of the beer had gone straight up it. He could feel the itch, the overwhelming need rising like a tide inside him. What was going on? He barely managed to set the can safely on the ground before, with a single sharp intake of breath, the first sneeze was upon him, a violent "HHAAHSCCHHUUUHHH!!!" that felt like a bombshell exploding from his nose. And, he realized suddenly, flushing with embarrassment, it was the first of many.

 

"HAAASSSCHUUUHH!! HAAHHH-CSHUUUHHH!!! AHHHHSSCHUUUHHH!!!" Leo sneezed a huge, helpless triple, only the fact that he was sitting down keeping him from staggering forward. Some of his teammates were looking at him, curious and maybe even a little worried—but he couldn't speak, couldn't even acknowledge them, could only sit and gasp and wait for the next volley of oncoming sneezes to overtake him.

 

"hhh...HhhhIdon'tknowwhaahh...HAASHNKF!! What'sgoingahhhHHHSSHHNK!! HAHHH-SSSHHCHUUHH!! What's going on but my nose...hhhHHHAAHH-CSHUUHH! I can't... I... hhhh..." As his halfhearted attempts to stifle failed, Leo trailed off apologetically, his eyelids fluttering as the next enormous sneeze rocked his swimsuit-clad body. Through slightly teary eyes, he saw Andy slowly approaching from across the backyard, eyebrows raised... and then another twinge ran across his nostrils and he felt himself snap forward again, erupting with another huge, helpless, unstoppable sneeze.

 

What seemed like hours later (but was probably closer to seconds), Leo felt the burning, quivering buzz begin to fade, and leaned back in his chair with a heavy sigh. He could practically feelhis teammate's stares on him and wiped his eyes blearily, doing his absolute best not to let the embarrassment show on his face. Andy had had sneezing fits like that before—as a matter of fact, Leo had even seen a couple himself—but that was Andy. People expected it from him, if nothing else. The dark-haired boy cracked a faint, apologetic smile, trying to ignore the fact that one last, subtle tickle was worming its way up through the back of his nose.

 

"Holy shit, man!" Andy said, a laugh coloring the words as he shook his head in disbelief. "And I thought I was the sneeze king of MUA! You aren't getting sick, are you?" His tone was light and teasing, but as he got closer, it was clear there was genuine concern in his face.

 

"Uh, n-no," Leo replied, shaking his head slowly. "I don't think so, at least." His brow furrowed as a thought suddenly occurred to him. "Actually, I think it, um, might have been the beer. Or just, like, alcohol in general. My uncle's the same way..." Massaging his long-suffering nose with a finger, he picked up the neglected can of beer and held it about half a foot under his nostrils, taking a slow, cautious sniff. Immediately, he felt the faint tickle inside his nose flare into that same prickling, insistent irritation he'd felt before, and nearly dropped the can as he quickly coaxed his overactive nostrils back under control. "Hhhh... hh-hHHH...hhhohgod, yeah. It's definitely that."

 

Andy blinked, then laughed, the rich, friendly sound making Leo's own smile a little less sheepish, a little more genuine. "Well fuck me!" he said, shaking his head slowly. "No shit? First time for everything, I guess. At least we'll always have a...ahh..." The words slowed, Andy's eyes slowly crossing as a thin, residual itch crawled its way along his broad nostrils. He held a hand up, a familiar gesture for anyone on the team, and took in a deep, shuddering breath... but even as he did, a faint whiff of alcohol wafted past Leo's own nose, which, combined with the barely-restrained sneeze from before, was more than enough to push him over the edge. He gasped softly, head tilting back...

 

"HUHHHEEESSCHOOOOO!!!"

"HAAAHHHSCCHUUUUUUUHH!!!"

 

The two near-simultaneous sneezes rang out through the backyard, their combined force and volume enough to catch the attention of every other member of the team (and, if a few of the later repetitions of the story are to be believed, several of the neighbors). For a moment, Andy and Leo were still, frozen in post-sneeze daze... and then their eyes met, and Leo, at a loss for any other way to react, started to laugh. Andy followed suit, and soon the entire team was in an uproar, basking in the ridiculousness of the entire thing. Andy hoisted Leo up from the chair and threw an arm around his shoulder, and proclaimed, in an only slightly drunken voice, "it's like I said, all right! Champions! Sneezing, swimming, whatever!" Even more laughter followed that, along with some scattered cheers. Leo sniffled, then smiled, any last shreds of embarrassment evaporating as he finally detached himself from Andy, talking and nodding along like he'd been there from the start. Jokes were exchanged, shoulders were punched, more drinks were poured (though Leo made sure to pinch his nose any time a cup or can got too close)...

 

And the party continued, happy and triumphant, long into the warm summer night.

[Garnet]

Wow, how nice! A cute, feel-good summer time fic, it's sorely needed during these crappy winter doldrums in the northern hemisphere. Thank you for sharing! @gryffin is gonna go nuts for this.

[Via]

8 hours ago, Garnet said:

Wow, how nice! A cute, feel-good summer time fic, it's sorely needed during these crappy winter doldrums in the northern hemisphere. Thank you for sharing! @gryffin is gonna go nuts for this.

Aw, thank you very much! And I certainly hope so.

[gryffin]

10 hours ago, Garnet said:

@gryffin is gonna go nuts for this.

Holy moly I am going nuts for this right now.

@Subsiss you're the sneezefic monarch of the century. I'm in love with this fic. I'll answer more articulately when I've had a chance to pick up my jaw from the floor and re-read the thing a few times. In the meantime, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!

[ukrsneeze]

This is so hot. Yep, it was written for gryffin, but I enjoyed it a lot too. Thank you!

[Via]

On 1/2/2017 at 8:09 PM, gryffin said:

Holy moly I am going nuts for this right now.

 

 

1 hour ago, ukrsneeze said:

This is so hot. Yep, it was written for gryffin, but I enjoyed it a lot too. Thank you!

Thank you both! I'm super glad you enjoyed it c: