Practice Makes Perfect...

[Pixieflower]

Hey! After much hesitation, I’ve decided to woman up and post a fic on here! I’ve actually never written any sort of fic other than required assignments in English before, let alone a sneezefic, so sorry if it sucks.  I know it sounds a bit awkward in some parts, but I’ll try to improve on my writing the best I can! This first part is more of a prologue, so the real action won’t start until part 2.

Character Description:
Felix: 5’10, lean but athletic figure, chestnut colored hair and hazel eyes, freckles along his nose and cheeks. He puts on a “tough” exterior to the rest of the world, but to Thomas, his confidant and best friend, he completely lets that guard down, and shows his softer, sweeter side. He is allergic to almost everything, from dust to flowers to cats, and he absolutely despises it, as he feels it makes him look pitiful and weak.

Thomas: 5’8, a year younger than Felix, scrawny, boyish figure, deep blackish/brown hair and blue eyes, pale skin, and glasses. He is extremely shy and a closeted gay, and he is in love with Felix, although he has already lost hope that their relationship could be any more than friendship. 

Britney - 5’2, blond hair that goes down to her shoulders and green eyes, lots of makeup, tanned skin, and a slim and athletic figure. You probably won’t be seeing her much after this part, but I decided to give her a description anyways in case any of you wanted a visual.

Thomas’s POV:
Thomas had only been asleep on the couch for twenty minutes before  the slam of the front door jolted him awake. He didn’t need to look up to know who it was. “C’mon Felix, haven’t you ever heard of knocking?” He said groggily, fumbling for his glasses.
“Tommy, I’m not in the mood,” Felix said, storming to the refrigerator. Thomas got up and walked over to him, curious and worried about his best friend. Felix rarely ever sounded this upset.
“What’s wrong, mate? Weren’t you just at the park with Britney?” Thomas asked. At the mention of his girlfriend’s name, Felix’s head spun around and glared at the younger boy.
“Don’t you ever mention that filthy skank’s name again, you hear me?” Felix growled. His eyes may as well have been shooting lasers at Thomas, he looked so mad.
“S-sorry...” Thomas stuttered, flustered by the intensity of his gaze. “Are you alright? Did something happen with Br...uh... with her?”
Felix’s eyes shifted from angry to sad at Thomas’s question. “She... she dumped me, Tommy.”
Thomas was at a loss for words. Britney and Felix had been dating for three years, and now they were just - over? 
Felix motioned the younger boy to the couch so he could explain. “It all started when we stepped outside this morning...”

4 hours earlier....

Felix’s POV:

Felix stepped out onto the front porch of his girlfriend’s house, hand in hand with his lover. Birds were chirping, the weather was perfect, and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. The young couple was about to go on a lunch date out in the park, and the they couldn’t have chosen a more perfect day. Today couldn’t possibly get any better, Felix thought, smiling as he felt the sun’s rays shining on his face. And he was right. 
As he was walking to the park with Britney, he noticed that more flowers were blooming outside than usual. At the same time, he remembered that he had forgotten to take his allergy medicine that day. And it was that exact moment that Britney decided to pick a strange-looking purple flower off the side of the road and stick it in his face. 
“Hey Felix, doesn’t this smell great?” Britney said excitedly, holding the flower right beneath his nose. 
Felix immediately felt a strong tickle in his nose, and tried to push it away. “Babe I ca...hhh... can’t... I’m aler... hehh...ha’tchuu! Allergic...” Felix said, running at his nose sheepishly. 
Britney appeared to not even hear him. “Babe, I got more! Look!” She said excitedly, pulling up an entire bouquet of the same purple flower and nearly shoving it up his nose. 
Felix waved away and stepped back in panic, but the damage had already been done. His sensitive nose was twitching harder and harder, and he knew that once he started sneezing, he wouldn’t be able to stop. So, he tried to hold them back. 
Britney pulled the flowers away, confused and unable to see the obvious problem that she had caused. “Uh... are you okay babe? You’re making a kinda weird face right now...”
Felix tried to nod and say that he was fine, but just the motion of nodding his head forward was enough to trigger one of the biggest sneezing fits he had had in months. “Hihhh... hi’tcheww! HatSHEW! Hehh... hiCHEWWW!!” he sneezed for a good five minutes longer, each sneeze getting louder and louder, before the fit was finally over, leaving him gasping for air and dizzy with fatigue. 
He looked up in shame to see Britney staring at him in utter disgust. “Eugh... learn to cover your mouth! You’re lucky someone like me is even willing to date someone like you...”
Felix’s face burned in shame. “I’m sor..hi’tchew! sorry babe... I’ll try to cover them from now on...”
Britney rolled her eyes and off to the park they went. But due to all the allergens he had now been exposed to, he was sneezing around five times per minute, and he could barely even talk on the rest of the way there.
Finally, they reached their destination, and Britney chose a nice little spot, next to a bush full of red roses. Britney, seeming to have forgotten all about the fiasco earlier, sat down excitedly and motioned for Felix to sit down next to her.
“Oh Felix, isn’t this romantic?” Britney said dreamily, “We’re in a secluded area... in the park... wouldn’t it be the perfect time to just...?” Her tone took on a more suggestive tone and she said this, and she leaned closer and closer to him, her hand slowly reaching for his face. 
Felix, immediately understanding the hint and a little too eager to get his hands on his girlfriends gorgeous locks, leaned in as well, and they quickly transitioned from a simple kiss to a full on make out session. But, of course, something had to ruin it halfway through the process. 
Britney, fully embracing the kiss, pushed him to the side, and his nose brushed against one of the roses in the bush next to him. He didn’t notice at first, but soon he felt a strong tickle in his nose that wouldn’t seem to go away. Although he tried to fight the urge, he knew he was going to sneeze soon, whether he wanted to or not. 
“Hih... hey babe?” He said, trying to lean away from her. But she ignored him, continuing to push him even further into the rose bush. 
Felix frantically looked around, desperate for an escape. His breath started to hitch more and more, and he knew that soon he would have to let all loose. 
“St... hehhh.. stohhhhp...” he tried to tell his girlfriend in one final warning before it was finally more than he could take.
He broke away from the kiss and started his second massive sneezing fit of the day. “Hihhht’chew! HehCHEW! Hihh.. hihhhh.. HAT’SHEWW!” Again, he was sneezing nonstop, hopelessly trying to apologize in between sneezes, and unable to even look up at Britney. But when he was finally able to stop, she was standing up, with her hands on her hips. Her face looked angrier than he had ever seen before in his life. 
“You. Sneezed. All. Over. My. New. Burberry. Coat.” She said, her voice calm, but scarier than she had ever sounded with her voice raised. She put the sleeve of her jacket up to his face and he could see that spray covered the entire thing. 
“I am... hehhh... so... hhi’tCHEW! so sorry...” he murmured, unable to even look at her. 
“See, this is the problem with you,” Britney said. “You sneeze way too often, and when you do, you spray everywhere! In fact, you know what?” She continued, a vain in her head throbbing more and more, “I’ve dealt with you for far too long!” We’re done!”
“Hehh... Hishew! I’m so sorry, I’ll im... hehh... improve ... hi’tchu! I promise! Please don’t leave me...” Was Felix’s only reply. 
Britney pondered the thought for a minute. “Fine. I’ll give you one last chance,” she told him.
Felix’s eyes lit up. “Really? Thank you babe... heSHEW! thank you...” he said, feeling like a dog at her feet.
“...on one condition.” She finished. “You have to prove to me how much you want me to stay. I’ll give you one minute, and you aren’t gonna sneeze at all for that minute. If you can make it through the full minute without sneezing, then I will stay with you. Pretty easy, right? And your time starts... now!” She quickly set the timer on her phone. 
“Wha... what?” Felix said, still trying to process her challenge. He couldn’t sneeze for one minute?
He didn’t understand why she would even give him such a demand. Besides, his nose felt like it was on fire at that moment. 
I’ll do it for her, he thought. Even though he currently felt like punching her, he had been in a relationship with Britney for three years. He wasn’t about to throw it all away. Besides, the challenge wasn’t that hard anyways. He just had to hold that sneeze...
“Thirty seconds!” Britney called out. 
I’m already halfway there, I can do this, he thought to himself. But the tickle was getting stronger and stronger. Felix rubbed furiously at his nose, but it seemed that the harder he tried to stop the tickle, the bigger it got. 
“Hihhh...” He couldn’t sneeze now. He just had to wait a few more seconds...
“Ten seconds! Gee, it looks like I’m gonna have to stay with you after a-“
“Hhhi’TSHOO!” A sudden breeze had forced Felix to surrender against all wishes. Right after he sneezed, he snapped his head back to look at Britney, and pleaded, desperately, “No! Please dohhh... hihh... HISHEW! please don’t go babe! Heh... HESHUU! Please...”
Britney scoffed down at her former boyfriend, unmoved. “How did I ever agree to date such a disgusting creature as you...” and walked off, leaving the poor boy feeling weak and heartbroken.

Back to the present

Thomas’s POV:
“And that’s how it ended.” Felix said, cringing at the memory. 
“She just left you just because you were sneezing? What kind of sick person would do that to her boyfriend of three years?”Thomas asked, befuddled. He couldn’t understand how anyone could ever do such a thing. And over something as small as sneezing! 
But, as selfish as it sounded, hearing Felix’s story had made Thomas feel... something. No one knew this about him, but hearing someone sneeze seemed to have a strange effect on him - it made him feel all warm and tingly inside, and he somehow longed for more. There was nothing he could do to explain this, and knowing this about himself made him feel like even more of an outsider to the rest of the world. 
“It was humiliating, Tommy. I don’t think I’ve ever been more embarrassed in my life,” Felix muttered, snapping Thomas out of his thoughts. 
Don’t be,” Thomas tried to comfort his friend, “There’s a difference between actually doing something embarrassing and just having a mean girlfriend who only cares about herself.” Thomas had never liked Britney. He had always felt that she was a bit too superficial and that Felix could do much better. But now he just wanted to murder the blondie. How could she make Felix feel insecure about his allergies when his sneezes were the cutest thing that Thomas had ever seen? 
“She’s right though,” Felix responded sadly. “I sneeze so much, and it’s disgusting. And I’ve spent so long sneezing uncovered that I don’t even think I’ll be able to get into the habit of covering them anymore. I guess I’m just destined to die alone...”
“Aw, c’mon mate...” Thomas said, trying to cheer him up again after the previous failed attempts, “Don’t worry, I’m sure Britney is the only one who found your sneezes to be that disgusting. In fact, there are probably some people out there who find your sneezes to be kinda... I dunno, cute or something...?” Thomas ventured. He immediately regretted what he said, but before he could take it back, Felix groaned.
“Who would find them cute? It’s sneezing, for crying out loud!”
A moment of awkward silence rested between them before Felix finally sat up and looked at his friend, hazel eyes gleaming. “I have an idea!” He said, excitedly. “We can practice! I’ll get a bunch of things that I’m allergic too, and you can teach me how to cover my sneezes properly! Then I can get Britney back, no problem!” 
Thomas froze in his seat. Felix wanted to induce with him? He must have heard wrong. A thousand thoughts went through his head before Felix snapped his fingers in front of him. “Hey, Tommy! Are you listening? You’ll help me, right?”
“You want me to induce on you?” Thomas asked. Was he dreaming? If he was, he didn’t want to wake up.
“If making me sneeze repeatedly so I can learn to sneeze into my elbow is what ‘induce’ means, then yes, Tommy. Gosh, you don’t need to act like it’s such a bloody honor or anything. Now are you in or not?” Felix said, exasperated.
“Y-yeah, I’m in...” Thomas said shakily.
“Good,” Felix replied. “I’ll be here at ten tomorrow so we can start the practice. Hopefully I won’t be sneezing grossly by the end of the day. Later, mate,” he said, walking out of Thomas’s house and driving away. 
Thomas didn’t quite know what to do. He had dreamt about this kind of scenario for ages, but was he really ready to make his best friend and the love of his life sneeze like crazy? He was unsure, but after several minutes of pacing back and forth in his room, he came to a conclusion - this was an opportunity for him. If he couldn’t have Felix, then at least he would have the memory of this. And, somehow, that was enough for him.

 

Thanks for reading! Sorry, I know there isn’t much M/M in this part, but there’s more to come! 

Edited February 20, 2018 by Kaze wo Hiku

[Chiller, a sneezy skeleton]

Wow... that was freaking amazing!!! Keep up the good work

[Masked Chaos]

This is fantastic!!!! I can't wait for the next part! 

[M214186]

Intriguing premise 

[ERWcst]

I cannot wait to see the next part!!!!!

[Pixieflower]

Hey! I’m *finally* back with part 2 of this fic! Guys, thank you so much to those of you who commented, they gave me motivation to continue with this fic because at one point when I was trying to write a second part for this, I was so lazy that I almost ditched the whole story altogether~
After posting part 1, I learned several things. First, for some reason, when I tried to transfer the story from google docs to the forum, the italics didn’t go through, so  some parts of the fic ended up sounding really weird because they were meant to be italicized, but ended up not being italicized. Secondly, I had forgotten at the time of posting part 1 that I am not validated yet, so I won’t be able to edit my title to let you guys know when I have updated the fic. Sorry about those two inconveniences!  Anyways, I hope you enjoy part 2! 

 

Part 2
Thomas’s POV:
Thomas didn’t sleep that night. The thought that he would be inducing his best friend and crush, of all people, was too much for him to take. It was the kind of thing that he had always dreamed about, but for it to actually happen? What if something went wrong? 
But before he knew it, it was morning, and it was time. Five minutes before the agreed meeting time, Felix slammed the door open(if that even makes sense) without knocking, as usual, making Thomas jump. 
Felix plopped down on the couch next to Thomas with a saddened look on his face. “She hasn’t been answering my calls, OR my texts. I’ve apologized to her about nine million times now and she hasn’t replied once!”
Thomas glanced over at his friend. “Felix, I told you, you need to forget that twat. She’s crazy to break up with you over a sneeze! Besides, who needs girls in their life anyways?” He meant it in more ways than one.
“Ugh, I guess you’re right,” Felix said gloomily. Suddenly, he seemed to snap out of his daze, and looked over at Thomas with a new light in his eyes. “And plus, by the time we’re through, my sneezes are gonna be clean and covered! Then she’ll have no choice but to take me back...” he mused.
Thomas sighed in disappointment. Why couldn’t he see?  But before he could mope over his one-sided love any more, he heard Felix fumbling around in his pocket. Thomas looked over, curious to see what it was. Finally, Felix pulled out a small tube of perfume, grinning widely. 
“I stole it from Britney’s Burberry Jacket,” Felix explained as he mocked his former girlfriend. “And since I’m allergic to almost everything, this would be a perfect starting point for our practices, don’t you think?” he continued, beaming as if it was the greatest idea in the world. 
Thomas took the tube from him, examining it. It was a girly, glittery perfume decorated with pink hearts. Thomas looked at the title of the perfume on the side of the bottle. “Sexy musk,” he read aloud, glancing up at Felix and giving him a questioning look. Felix only shrugged.
Without thinking, Thomas spritzed some of the perfume onto his hands to test the smell. It smelled like roses and vanilla. It was so very... Britney. 
However, he was taken aback by how strong the smell was - it was enough to make his eyes water. Suddenly, Thomas realized what he had done, but it was too late. He looked up to see Felix stuck in an expression that was halfway between a glare and a pre-sneeze face, and trying in vain to fan away the “smell” with his hands. 
“T...hehh... Tommy you bastard...hehh....” Felix tried(but failed) to say in an intimidating voice. He scrunched up his nose to stop the sneeze, but the sneeze ultimately won the battle.
“Hehh... heh’TCHOO! Hhh’tchoo!” Felix sneezed, his nose turning a light shade of pink. Thomas gulped and looked away awkwardly, mentally slapping himself for being so careless.
“God dammit Tommy,” Felix rubbed his nose. “Give that to me,” he snatched, the perfume away from Thomas’s trembling hand. However, he chuckled when he saw the embarrassed expression on the younger boy’s face, and ruffled his hair in affection. 
Thomas, regaining his composure, shook his head to clear his mind and faced Felix. “Well, the good news is, the perfume only made you sneeze twice. It’s a good starting point for you.” He tried to take the perfume from Felix’s hand to examine it again, but Felix held it out of his reach with a smirk. “I am not letting you touch this after what you just did.” 
Thomas rolled his eyes. “Oh, Felix. Stop acting like a little kid! Do you want Britney back or not?”
Felix pouted at Thomas, his expression reminiscent of a child who was being forced to eat his lima beans, and reluctantly handed over the perfume bottle. 
Thomas took away the bottle, smirking, and examined it once again. Well, pretended to examine it. In reality, he was too busy watching Felix continue to paw at his nose out of the corner of his eye, the way he scrunched up his nose so adorably, the way he moved oh so perfectly...
“So, here’s our plan for our training today,” Felix said, snapping Thomas out of this thoughts, “You’re gonna go into another room and spray a bit of perfume on you, and come out. And I’ll try to cover any sneezes that the perfume may cause. This way, if Britney happens to be wearing a shitload of perfume when I come to apologize to her in person, I won’t need to worry about sneezing grossly, and she’ll fall right for me again. Understand, Tommy?” 
Thomas nodded in understanding, but was too nervous to say anything more. 
They sat like that for a moment before Felix waved his hand in front of his friend’s face. “What are you waiting for? Go put on the perfume already!” He said, laughing at Thomas’s awkwardness. 
“Er, right, sorry...” Thomas said awkwardly, and scurried into his bedroom. At soon as his walked in, he let down his mask of confidence and threw his hands up in a nervous wreck. Why oh why did he ever agree to something like this? Seeing Felix sneeze was one thing. Having a conversation about him sneezing was another. But giving him sneeze training?? That was a whole new level that Thomas had never imagined he’d have to worry about. 
He finally tried to spritz some perfume onto his wrists, but to his surprise, no perfume came out. The bottle was full of the pink liquid, so Thomas figured that there must be a problem with the nozzle of the perfume bottle. Finally, Thomas settled on just pouring what he could onto himself. He carefully unscrewed the cap of the perfume, the smell already hitting him the second it came off. He got into position to pour as little of the liquid as he could onto his wrists. 
“Tommy! What’s taking you so long? Have you fallen asleep?” Felix shouted from the other room. Thomas, startled from the sudden voice, jerked his hand, spilling the contents of the perfume bottle all over himself. Thomas gasped in horror. His arms, shirt and pants were completely soaked, and all his hand held now was an empty perfume bottle. The smell hit him like a brick wall, and it was enough to make even him sneeze if he wasn’t too scared to do so. 
“Tommy?” Felix opened the door and his eyes widened when when he saw Thomas, soaking wet and holding an empty perfume bottle. “What in the bloody hell happened here? Let’s get you dried off, you klutz,” he chuckled, walking over to Thomas to help him up.
“Felix, wait - “ Thomas tried to say, but it was too late. As soon as Felix got close enough to him, he froze and stared up at Thomas in panic. Helplessness filled his normally bright brown eyes, and they soon fluttered shut as Felix tilted his head up as his breath hitched in the beginning of a sneeze. 
“Hehh... heh’tCHOO! Hihhht’choo! Heh’CHEW! Hihh.. hihhhh.. HAT’SHEWW!” This went on for a few minutes. As he sneezed more and more, Felix’s face started streaming with allergic tears, and his nose dropped with snot. He crumpled down to his knees, his sneezing fit making him weak to the point where he had barely any control over his own movements anymore.
Thomas was in a daze. He could barely comprehend what was happening as he watched his best friend snap his head forward again and again in a sneeze. It was... amazing and horrifying at the same time - if that even made sense. 
A few moments into his sneezing fit, Felix finally found the strength to look up at Thomas. “Wha.. heh’TCHOO! What’re you doi...hehh... doi’tCHOO! Get away... the perfume... hihTCHEW!” 
Thomas snapped out of his daze, realizing that he was the cause of his friend’s allergy attack, and ran out of the room to grab some water and allergy meds, panicking at his current situation. He quickly changed out of his clothes into the closest thing that was near him. When he returned, Felix had stopped sneezing, for the most part, and was leaning against the bed, exhausted. He looked like a mess. 
Thomas ran over to him, stroking his face in worry. “You alright mate?” He said softly. 
Felix nodded, eyes closed and face flushed from exhaustion. Thomas felt a wave of guilt wash over him. Of course he wasn’t alright. 
“Lets get you washed up,” Thomas said, helping Felix to the restroom. 
“Heh’tchiew!” was Felix’s only reply.  Thomas chuckled at his friend, putting a wet towel on his face and drying it of tears and snot. 
As soon as Felix saw himself in the mirror, he gasped. “No... no no no no” he breathed, as if his face looked so horrible at the moment that it was impossible. “I can’t go outside looking like this, I was going to go make up with Britney after we fixed my sneezes! She’ll never take me back if I look like this...” he groaned.
Thomas patted him on the back, trying to console him. “You know, Felix, don’t you think you’re working a bit too hard for her? Maybe we should stop with this, uh, training we’ve been doing. There’s plenty of other girls who would go crazy for you!”
“No,” Felix persisted, “I have to fix the way I sneeze, and quickly! All that we got done today was turn me into a bloody mess! We’re starting again, now.”
Thomas shook his head. “Absolutely not,” he said sternly, “just look at you! You get exposed to some perfume and you get so winded that you could be knocked over with a feather! You are going to go home and rest right now.”
“But - “
“No buts,” Thomas said, smirking with amusement. Felix crossed his arms and pouted for the second time that day. It was a rare expression for someone like Felix, and it was so cute Thomas had to fight to keep his stern look and stand his ground. 
After a few moments of silence between the two, Thomas was unable to resist Felix’s puppy face anymore. “Fine,” he grumbled, “we can meet tomorrow. But no more making you sneeze today. And no more perfume.”
Felix’s face lit up at Thomas’s answer. “Yesss! This time I’ll actually fix my sneezes, I promise! Tomorrow at nine am! Later Tommy!”
And with that, Felix walked out the door(pranced was more like it), seeming to have completely forgotten about his swollen face and itchy nose, leaving a befuddled Thomas in the bathroom, holding a packet of allergy meds and a wet towel. 
“I never even got to give him the allergy meds,” he muttered as he walked to his bedroom and sat on the bed. Seeing Felix in such a vulnerable state that day had nearly given him a heart attack, and he didn’t know what to expect for the next day. In one way, it was amazing - Felix had adorable sneezes, and the situation was one that Felix had thought could only happen in dreams. But, something about it felt... wrong, almost. Like, somehow, Thomas was using Felix. But that couldn’t be true. He was just following his best friend’s orders. And, in this case, his best friend’s orders were to do something that happened to turn Thomas on without that best friend knowing. Thomas was just being a good friend, and there was absolutely nothing to worry about. Right?

So... this part definitely didn’t turn out the way I thought it would. I was planning for it to be a cute lil fluffy chapter, and for Felix to fix his “problem” in the end. But, I kept thinking of new ideas mid-chapter, and he still isn’t anywhere near to fixing his sneezing problem yet. I’m so sorry about the wait, but I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Also, I’m not really sure what to do for the next chapter, so I’m open to requests or constructive comments! Thanks for reading!

[Tweedledee]

This is a very interesting plot idea! Looking forward to more!

[M214186]

So exciting please do continue with the training 

[SpookyBoi]

On 2/19/2018 at 7:01 PM, Pixieflower said:

So... this part definitely didn’t turn out the way I thought it would. I was planning for it to be a cute lil fluffy chapter, and for Felix to fix his “problem” in the end. But, I kept thinking of new ideas mid-chapter, and he still isn’t anywhere near to fixing his sneezing problem yet. I’m so sorry about the wait, but I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Also, I’m not really sure what to do for the next chapter, so I’m open to requests or constructive comments! Thanks for reading!

Well if they're trying to "train" him to control his sneezes it might be good for him to try something that Thomas has a little more control over, so maybe a feather, a flower with pollen, or dust something like that.  I'm really enjoying this cute little fic, and I can't wait to see what you do with it.

[kushamisukii]

I can't wait for the next part !! I love it. Maybe he could induce Felix when training. =)

[Alex Hemmings]

I loved it so much thank you

 

[Evian]

Cuteee