I want your help! Dilemma: Bloopers

[I love Alan Rickman]

I wanted to post this and get some advice from you guys! I have a great friend who is a YouTuber. I’ve been recently thinking how she has been warming up in front of a camera. She’s more of herself in front of the camera than ever before. I also recently saw a blooper video from one of my favorite YouTubers and remembered how much I (and a lot of people I know) love bloopers! Therefore, I thought, since she’s warming up to the camera it might be the perfect time for her to make a blooper video! 

My friend is my teacher, role model, and friend who is 25. We are very close in our friendship. She is a very big perfectionist and accepts she feels she needs to get better at accepting her mistakes. Therefore, not only do I think a blooper video would be great to show she is getting more comfortable in front of the camera, but to help her become a little more comfortable about her mistakes. Plus, I feel like it would form a better connection between her and her viewers. They’ll see some of the process and mistakes that go into making her videos, and they can laugh with her.  In one of her videos, she kept in a part where her cat was trying to eat a thumbtack and she jumped up while recording and stopped him. She’s also left in some little segments of her other cat trying to hog the camera by jumping on the table behind her while recording. Or when she completely messed up a word and burst out laughing before correcting herself. Silly little moments like that make the video a bit extra entertaining. 

Speaking of entertainment, and seeing that her channel has also been stuck on the same thousand of subscribers for over a year now, I also felt this could be a way to increase engagement and make her audience a little more diverse. People who may otherwise be more bored watching music videos, covers, original music, or music tutorials could be kept entertained by the blooper videos and bloopers in videos. If they’re kept entertained, they could also learn more about those topics if they wouldn’t usually watch videos on them and perhaps make new friends! I do think that there would be a lot of benefits to making a blooper video. Plus, I think a blooper video would be easier to get out when she’s very busy (like now) than a normal video. That’s because everything is already prerecorded and she only has to edit together a compilation instead of set up for recording and record lots of takes.

The only thing at this point is, how do you think I should bring it up? Should I mention it at all? I was thinking of saying, “I think you’d make a great blooper video,” But I think that may come across as, “You probably make a lot of mistakes while recording, so I think you should make a blooper video!” and I really don’t want her to get offended. 😅 Also, I feel like if I mention this idea that I should mention the fetish in some way too, because I don’t want to get her into a situation where she could possibly come across some of the few sneeze fetishists who may prey on her if she releases a sneeze blooper and thus keep hounding on her for more sneeze content. That’s not what her channel is about, and she doesn’t deserve that. Also, it might ruin the fetishist reputation for her. She may look down on us and not realize most of us are great people who just also happen to love sneezes!

I don’t know how I’d mention the fetish either. I don’t know if I should mention I have it (especially because I’m a girl too and I’m straight, and I don’t want her thinking her sneezes are arousing to me) or just say I found it online, as she knows I’m a big science nerd. But I don’t know where I’d go from there either.

Please vote in the questions in the poll so I know what you all think, and if there’s a suggestion you have that isn’t in the poll, please tell me in a reply what your idea is. However, I’d love to hear your thoughts even if the poll entirely covers it!

 

Also, side note: what do you think about blooper videos? Do you usually find them silly? What do you think makes a good or bad blooper video? Do you agree with me, or do you think differently? Please tell me your answers (and how you think I should bring up the topic if at all) in a response and/or in the poll! I apologize this was so long, but I wanted to say everything here!

Edited April 17, 2019 by I love Alan Rickman
Fixed poll

[Reader]

You should keep it very simple. 

“I’ve been trying to think of ways you can attract more audiences. Have you ever thought about making blooper videos?”

See what she says and then go from there. If she asks what the blooper content should be, then just tell her whatever makes her laugh. 

11 minutes ago, I love Alan Rickman said:

I really don’t want her to get offended. 

It’s not something to get offended about. And I should know because I’m a sensitive person. Highly trained actors mess up and make blooper reels. As a perfectionist, she would have the most bloopers because she would nitpick everything. 

There’s no reason for you to mention this fetish unless you’re going to mention every fetish she would showcase. 

If she directly asks you whether she should include her sneezes or not, just say no. 

Or answer her like a vanilla would which is you since you don’t like her sneezes. 

But just keep it simple. There’s a lot of thought going into this that doesn’t seem warranted. 

[I love Alan Rickman]

10 minutes ago, Reader said:

You should keep it very simple. 

“I’ve been trying to think of ways you can attract more audiences. Have you ever thought about making blooper videos?”

See what she says and then go from there. If she asks what the blooper content should be, then just tell her whatever makes her laugh. 

It’s not something to get offended about. And I should know because I’m a sensitive person. Highly trained actors mess up and make blooper reels. As a perfectionist, she would have the most bloopers because she would nitpick everything. 

There’s no reason for you to mention this fetish unless you’re going to mention every fetish she would showcase. 

If she directly asks you whether she should include her sneezes or not, just say no. 

Or answer her like a vanilla would which is you since you don’t like her sneezes. 

But just keep it simple. There’s a lot of thought going into this that doesn’t seem warranted. 

Thank you very much for this response!! I greatly appreciate it and your suggestions. I’d appreciate if you vote on the poll too if you haven’t already so the tally is as accurate as possible

Edited April 17, 2019 by I love Alan Rickman

[facet]

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Edited November 1, 2019 by facet
Removed by user.

[I love Alan Rickman]

9 minutes ago, facet said:

As discussed in your previous thread, I believe you ought to tell her that there is fetish community out there so she should not put sneezes in her videos.

At this point, I think you owe her that warning.

I generally think you shouldn't bring up your own fetish, and I also at this point think this whole thing is compromised and tainted beyond repair so I do not think you should suggest to her making a blooper video in the first place.

I don’t understand or see how this is compromised or tainted beyond repair. If you want to discuss this, please pm me. The stuff with the previous thread was a mistake that I’ve learned from, and we figured stuff out but I’ve thought since then if I mention it, I don’t want her to get the impression that we’re all bad either. So that’s why I’ve since second guessed mentioning the bloopers or fetish in the first place. 

Edit: Also, y’all have helped me a lot, so I wanted to bring all the options I’ve thought of since then into the question

Edited April 17, 2019 by I love Alan Rickman

[facet]

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Edited November 1, 2019 by facet
Removed by user.

[I love Alan Rickman]

9 minutes ago, facet said:

My desire to PM you is less than null.

You asked for opinions from the forum in public, and this is my opinion here on the forum in public. This is not an attack against you. 

I just think that this is a terrible idea wrought with compromised intent and a lack of transparency and consent.

It doesn't matter if she thinks we're all bogeymen in the night, either. All that matters is that she is made aware of a potential threat. You have a duty to her as her friend to let her know that.

I appreciate your thoughts. But what do you mean it’s a terrible idea with a lack of transparency and consent? It would indeed be consent because I’d be suggesting it to her, and she’d be doing it if she pleases. I’m not telling her to put sneeze stuff out there, and I don’t want her to either, because I’m concerned for her and she’s my friend. Which is why I’m wanting to mention the fetish in some way or another, just not sure how

Edit: And how is it compromised intent? Please explain. Again, I will make sure sneezes are not part of it if I mention the bloopers, because I want to protect her

Edited April 17, 2019 by I love Alan Rickman

[Reader]

I like the idea of you mentioning the general fetish community and telling her to be careful.

But if you only mention the sneeze fetish, she’s going to be suspicious that you have that fetish. Which you do, and I don’t think you should tell her about your own fetish. That’s the one thing I’m concerned about. 

[I love Alan Rickman]

Just now, Reader said:

I like the idea of you mentioning the general fetish community and telling her to be careful.

But if you only mention the sneeze fetish, she’s going to be suspicious that you have that fetish. Which you do, and I don’t think you should tell her about your own fetish. That’s the one thing I’m concerned about. 

I understand that concern. I think I do have a bit of an excuse though, since I am indeed a science nerd at look at articles a lot. That’s actually how I found the fetish in the first place. And then I realized I have it. But I am keeping in mind all the points from both sides

[Wilde]

For starters, kudos for formulating your situation and questions so clearly. You seem to have really taken yesterday’s discussion into account and that’s impressive!

I’m just going to go ahead and say it, I think mentioning the blooper video and the fetish to her is a bad idea all together. It’ll expose her to the fetish and possibly the bad side of the fetish community, and it might give her a bad idea of the fetish. Mentioning it might also put you in a tough spot; I know a lot of science geeks and people who have amazing trivia knowledge and none of them have ever mentioned a sneeze fetish to me (and sneezing comes up in conversation semi-regularly, so there would be opportunity). I think it would also be worth wondering if your friend would really be better off knowing about the fetish. If you just want to tell her about yourself and the fetish because you want to, you absolutely should, but in that case you shouldn’t frame it as anything, in my personal opinion. 

On blooper videos in general, while I don’t watch them often, in my opinion a sneeze doesn’t count as a blooper; it’s an involuntary bodily reaction, while I’d think a blooper would be something like goofing up a sentence or a cat getting in the frame or something. That’s funny. I imagine to most non-fetishists, seeing someone sneeze isn’t necessarily funny or enjoyable (though I wouldn’t know, seeing as I have the fetish). As I mentioned in the first thread, I’m sure there’s heaps of other ways in which she could increase her engagement (I’m sure there’s lots of YouTube videos on this). 

[I love Alan Rickman]

2 hours ago, Sooph said:

For starters, kudos for formulating your situation and questions so clearly. You seem to have really taken yesterday’s discussion into account and that’s impressive!

I’m just going to go ahead and say it, I think mentioning the blooper video and the fetish to her is a bad idea all together. It’ll expose her to the fetish and possibly the bad side of the fetish community, and it might give her a bad idea of the fetish. Mentioning it might also put you in a tough spot; I know a lot of science geeks and people who have amazing trivia knowledge and none of them have ever mentioned a sneeze fetish to me (and sneezing comes up in conversation semi-regularly, so there would be opportunity). I think it would also be worth wondering if your friend would really be better off knowing about the fetish. If you just want to tell her about yourself and the fetish because you want to, you absolutely should, but in that case you shouldn’t frame it as anything, in my personal opinion. 

On blooper videos in general, while I don’t watch them often, in my opinion a sneeze doesn’t count as a blooper; it’s an involuntary bodily reaction, while I’d think a blooper would be something like goofing up a sentence or a cat getting in the frame or something. That’s funny. I imagine to most non-fetishists, seeing someone sneeze isn’t necessarily funny or enjoyable (though I wouldn’t know, seeing as I have the fetish). As I mentioned in the first thread, I’m sure there’s heaps of other ways in which she could increase her engagement (I’m sure there’s lots of YouTube videos on this). 

Thanks, yeah I always aim to be a better person. 

That’s the concern I’d have if I didn’t tell her. That if that happened and the bad side attacked her without any prior knowledge, she’d have the bad idea of the fetish. Hmm interesting. And what do you mean don’t frame it as anything? That confuses me. I do kinda want to tell her for that reason to: just because we’re friends. I think maybe it’d bring us a bit closer. Though I don’t want any misunderstandings that if I mention my fetish to her, that must mean she arouses me. She doesn’t. I just find it nice and that’s all. Only male sneezes arouse me. Idk, maybe I will wait until I’m at least eighteen though to mention it so I don’t seem like a weirdo.  And we will be closer then anyway, so.

I thought of warning her if mentioning bloopers because I have come across a handful of blooper videos with sneezes since I enjoy watching blooper videos. They’re nice and funny. So I’ve just kinda thought maybe some do consider it a blooper. I personally agree though that a blooper to me would be something like the goofing up a sentence or cat in the frame. 

Yeah, I don’t know. I guess it was just an idea I had since I’ve been watching bloopers recently lol

[Garnet]

43 minutes ago, I love Alan Rickman said:

Though I don’t want any misunderstandings that if I mention my fetish to her, that must mean she arouses me. She doesn’t. I just find it nice and that’s all. Only male sneezes arouse me.

Buddy. You sure do write a lot of female observations and stories. I don't care about your orientation fetish or otherwise, but if you're going to play the "female sneezes mean nothing to me!" angle, probably... no.

Here's my opinion: no blooper video, no mention of fetish. I cannot imagine a random video of mess-ups, unless it is extraordinarily charming, is going to net some random Youtuber a bunch of extra followers. Just leave well enough alone.

[I love Alan Rickman]

2 hours ago, Garblin said:

Buddy. You sure do write a lot of female observations and stories. I don't care about your orientation fetish or otherwise, but if you're going to play the "female sneezes mean nothing to me!" angle, probably... no.

Here's my opinion: no blooper video, no mention of fetish. I cannot imagine a random video of mess-ups, unless it is extraordinarily charming, is going to net some random Youtuber a bunch of extra followers. Just leave well enough alone.

I don’t think they mean nothing to me, they do nothing to me. I’m not aroused by them. I just think they’re cute, just like how a girl says to another girl that she looks pretty or “That was cute.” But it’s not in a sexual manner. And stories with females are easier to write for me since I’m a female. Observation-wise, I write what I observe. Hence observations. I have very few male teachers currently (literally one), and my male friends are either underage or just turned 18. But when I actually had more male teachers, heck yeah I wrote about them. Lol. The female obs are just more detailed since I have gotten better at imagery since then and again don’t have as many males to observe in my life which I can describe on here. Or even want to describe on here. Ones I wouldn’t want to describe would be like family, like with my dad. I would never put an ob about him on here because I’d just cringe the whole time. I’m being completely honest when I say female sneezes don’t arouse me. I just think they’re cute, in a non-sexual way, and I write more about them in stories and obs since I have many more female friends with whom I could share here. And also being a female myself, I can better understand and write a female main character than a male one.

Thanks for your opinions, though. I do appreciate hearing from both sides. It keeps my mind more open

[Anonymouse]

2 hours ago, Garblin said:

Here's my opinion: no blooper video, no mention of fetish. I cannot imagine a random video of mess-ups, unless it is extraordinarily charming, is going to net some random Youtuber a bunch of extra followers. Just leave well enough alone.

I really can't anything else to this but I agree with Garblin 100%.

[Watercolor Daydreams]

Wait a second, why is this a full-blown poll now? You asked about this already and the majority of the forum counseled you against this. Why are you dragging it out to this extent? Do it or don't do it, but given people's past responses (and most of the responses to this poll) you're not going to get universal approval on the forum's part on this matter.

[I love Alan Rickman]

47 minutes ago, Watercolor Daydreams said:

Wait a second, why is this a full-blown poll now? You asked about this already and the majority of the forum counseled you against this. Why are you dragging it out to this extent? Do it or don't do it, but given people's past responses (and most of the responses to this poll) you're not going to get universal approval on the forum's part on this matter.

Because it’s more organized, and I want to get responses without misunderstandings because of the craziness from yesterday

[shishio]

The poll was simply another format in order to get people to agree with you. In other words, you're looking for someone to give you the "yes" that you're looking for in regards to the blooper video etc... so it'll give you the excuse to do what you want.

[I love Alan Rickman]

12 minutes ago, shishio said:

The poll was simply another format in order to get people to agree with you. In other words, you're looking for someone to give you the "yes" that you're looking for in regards to the blooper video etc... so it'll give you the excuse to do what you want.

No? It was to see what everyone thought. Some people like to be anonymous in their thoughts too or are shy on a forum like this, so the poll is a way for them to able to vote too. Please don’t put words in my mouth

Edit: I don’t have a specific idea whether I want to mention the bloopers or not either, hence why I asked this in the first place. If I was sure what I wanted and was ignorant as to not listen to other sides, I would’ve never posted this. It would’ve just been a waste of time. But I honestly want thoughts on it because I care about my friend and want her to succeed, but I was hesitant to mention this blooper idea because I don’t want her being unknowingly preyed on by jerks because she didn’t know about the possibility. I’m happy we’re getting a variety of replies, because it shows me that everyone has different opinions on this, but I can still see where similarities and differences lie.

Edited April 18, 2019 by I love Alan Rickman

[Anonymouse]

It looks like a significant majority of the people who have voted think this is a bad idea. I'm wondering what you've decided to do now that you've gotten more feedback.

[Wilde]

10 hours ago, I love Alan Rickman said:

And what do you mean don’t frame it as anything? That confuses me. I do kinda want to tell her for that reason to: just because we’re friends. I think maybe it’d bring us a bit closer. Though I don’t want any misunderstandings that if I mention my fetish to her, that must mean she arouses me. She doesn’t. I just find it nice and that’s all. Only male sneezes arouse me.

What I meant: If you want to tell her about you having the fetish, just because you want to tell a friend etc, you totally should. Just don’t wrap it in a story about blooper videos, or frame it as advice about growing her channel or anything like that. (I’m not saying it sounds like this is what you want to do, I’m just saying this wouldn’t be the right thing to do) 

As for not wanting her to get the wrong idea, that’s part of the reason why I don’t tell my irl friends about the fetish; I wouldn’t want to make them uncomfortable (and then there’s the bucketloads of internalised shame etc, but that’s a conversation for another day). It’s happened to me often enough that I told a female friend I’m attracted to women, and they’d immediately project that onto themselves and think I must be into them. 

This all strays quite far from your question, so I’ll take it back to the original point. In my opinion, you shouldn’t tell her. This whole idea about the blooper videos seems to need way too much thought and justification to still sound like a good idea. 

I hope all the advice on these threads gave you some clarity, and I hope it turns out well, whatever you choose to (not) do. 

[I love Alan Rickman]

8 hours ago, Anonymouse said:

It looks like a significant majority of the people who have voted think this is a bad idea. I'm wondering what you've decided to do now that you've gotten more feedback.

Of course I wouldn’t do it if the majority is saying no. I’ve looked at the poll myself. I came into this with an open mind. Why ask for help if you’re not gonna take it into consideration? ☺️ I just have about five more days until I see her again, so I’m letting this sit here to let it reach more people and see just how much things are separated in case the gap may narrow or widen. (At this point I’m thinking it’ll widen, but I also can’t predict the future)

 

2 hours ago, Sooph said:

What I meant: If you want to tell her about you having the fetish, just because you want to tell a friend etc, you totally should. Just don’t wrap it in a story about blooper videos, or frame it as advice about growing her channel or anything like that. (I’m not saying it sounds like this is what you want to do, I’m just saying this wouldn’t be the right thing to do) 

As for not wanting her to get the wrong idea, that’s part of the reason why I don’t tell my irl friends about the fetish; I wouldn’t want to make them uncomfortable (and then there’s the bucketloads of internalised shame etc, but that’s a conversation for another day). It’s happened to me often enough that I told a female friend I’m attracted to women, and they’d immediately project that onto themselves and think I must be into them. 

This all strays quite far from your question, so I’ll take it back to the original point. In my opinion, you shouldn’t tell her. This whole idea about the blooper videos seems to need way too much thought and justification to still sound like a good idea. 

I hope all the advice on these threads gave you some clarity, and I hope it turns out well, whatever you choose to (not) do. 

I appreciate all the points you mentioned here. I originally just wanted to suggest the blooper video. It wasn’t about the fetish until I thought of it more (and you guys brought it up to me) that it could be a cause for concern if she were to make that. So I felt like I needed to warn her in that case. Then I realized even if I don’t mention it, I probably should warn her anyway. I’m still deciding whether or not I’ll do that though since it’s just a thought, but I am trying to figure out when I would if I do. If I should wait until I’m of age or say it soon.

[•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•]

hi! just a thought from me: usually it's best to only discuss fetishes if the conversation has naturally turned in that direction AND if the person you're talking to has made it clear that they're comfortable with discussing sexual topics with you. good to keep that in mind! (and of course when i say naturally, i mean as in you haven't subtley steered it there, as in it just happened by itself the way conversation does sometimes)

[I love Alan Rickman]

56 minutes ago, •.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.• said:

hi! just a thought from me: usually it's best to only discuss fetishes if the conversation has naturally turned in that direction AND if the person you're talking to has made it clear that they're comfortable with discussing sexual topics with you. good to keep that in mind! (and of course when i say naturally, i mean as in you haven't subtley steered it there, as in it just happened by itself the way conversation does sometimes)

Of course! Thanks for the point. That’s very important. And yeah, I get what you mean by naturally. I wouldn’t subtly steer it, that’s just rude to do.

Edited April 18, 2019 by I love Alan Rickman

[Bondi]

I'm also of the no blooper, no mention of the fetish camp, honestly. I personally wouldn't subscribe to someone because of a blooper video and probably wouldn't watch it unless I knew and liked the person's work, but that's just me. No blooper video means no need to mention the fetish, keeps things simpler that way. Just my opinion, what you do is up to you, of course.

[I love Alan Rickman]

1 hour ago, Bondi said:

I'm also of the no blooper, no mention of the fetish camp, honestly. I personally wouldn't subscribe to someone because of a blooper video and probably wouldn't watch it unless I knew and liked the person's work, but that's just me. No blooper video means no need to mention the fetish, keeps things simpler that way. Just my opinion, what you do is up to you, of course.

Well of course you wouldn’t subscribe just for a blooper video. What I thought before that she could include some more bloopers on videos too and it would keep people interested who don’t generally watch the type of content she makes. Broaden the audience a bit. At this point I’m trying to think of a better suggestion though since the vast majority is seeming against this