Procuring Ingredients (Male Troll)

[Vintagedarling]

 

Mia is a Witch— I imagine her to be as cute as a button but eh— no concrete detail other then she’s much smaller then Gorn

Gorn is a Troll— that looks like a Vogon (HGttG)— where the nose is misshapen and at the top of their forehead— but less potato body— in my pov but to each their own— 

More modern day out look for purchasing your mystic goods— no trumping through the woods— just go down to your local oddities supplies shop-? 

Haven’t written in awhile— Hope you enjoy— 

 

 

 

Mia hefted her basketful of ingredients onto the counter. 

 

“Find everything Miss?” The Clerk asked.

 

Mia nodded, looking over her items as the Clerk took them out and scanned them, “Yes, yes I did... Oh! Wait, no... I couldn’t find ‘Nostril hair of Troll’.” She frowned as she withdrew her eyes from the Clerk’s hands as he scanned the barcode on the bottle of dried ‘Weeping Willow Root,’ to see that HE was in fact a Troll. 

 

“Well I’m sorry about that Miss,” the Troll said as he bagged the last item from the counter. “But we keep that item behind the counter,” he finished with a snicker. 

 

Mia’s brow raised in confusion at the Troll.

 

“Get it?” The Troll asked. “Cause I’m what you want!!” He laughed out raucously. “And I’m behind the counter!”

 

Her face felt like a scorching cauldron and had to be the color of the fiery red embers that burned below. 

 

Noticing the witch’s sudden blush, “I-I just mean that I-,” the Troll paused to grunt, “-have have that in stock,” he finished, pointing at his nose. 

 

“Oooh!! Hahaha!!” Mia chuckled sheepishly. Going around the counter when the Troll motioned her over to follow as he ambled over to a chair just behind the front counter. 

 

“How many do you need?” Plucking the tweezers from the arm of the chair, Gorn handed them to the little witch as he plopped himself down on the comfy seat. Sitting brought him much closer so all he had to do was lean his head down a bit further and the witch would be able to reach. 

 

Mia looked at the tweezers in her hand and then to the misshapen Troll nose before her. 

“Uhhh...” She stammered, “I’ve never... Gotten something... from the source before... like this...”

 

Gorn blinked as he leaned back to look at her. “I mean I can get them for you... I just...” With a heavy sigh, “I forgot my glasses at home today... so I can’t really use a mirror to see up close to get a good enough hold on the hairs individually so the root comes too...” 

 

Mia chewed her lip, mulling the offer over, but reluctantly shook her head. “I-I can pluck them,” she nodded, squaring her stance. 

 

Gorn smiled with a nod. Leaning forward, he prepared to walk her through collecting. “Okay, jus—“

 

As soon as the Troll leaned back down, Mia had the tweezers in his right nostril, plucking out hairs on her first pinch. 

 

“N-Not from my r-r-rriiiihHH! HihhiiihH—“

 

Mia paled as the Troll’s right nostril flared and writhed just before her. His mouth sucking in powerful breaths. She squeezed the tweezers as tight as she could so she wouldn’t loose her collection.

 

“S’—- t—tiiHhhH!!— T-HihH!!—-Ticklish!!” Gorn finally got out as the sneezy sensation began to fade. With a sniffle, “How many did you get?”

 

Mia looked down to the clump of hair between the prongs. There looked to be about nine hairs, but only one had a blue root attached. “Four,” she coughed, “but only one is good.” 

 

Gorn sniffed as it felt like more then four nose hairs had been pulled. “Well... Alright... At least we’ve got one.”

 

Mia relaxed back as she set the viable nose hair in a little baggie, discarding the rest to the floor. Grateful that the Troll wouldn’t be able to see her fib. Not wanting to be questioned further, “I only need four, so one down, three to go. Well... I usually mess up... so it’ll probably be best to have a spare... I’ll need five nostril hairs... well only four now.” Mia smiled innocently. 

 

Gorn nodded as he leaned back down so the little witch could reach his nose again, jerking back when he saw her going for his right nostril again. “Oye! I said that one is sensitive!!”

 

“Oh!! Right! Sorry!!” Mia said with a blush. “Just got excited.”

 

“Hmmm...” Gorn hummed in acknowledgement though he didn’t believe her. “Now, as I was going to tell you before... I know there’s quite a bit of nose hairs that are easy to get to... the ones at the rims. However, those don’t usually come away with the root... you have to go in deeper to get the better odds.” Leaning back down, Gorn crossed his eyes so he could watch the ‘bit of a blur’ witch. 

 

With a nod, Mia peered into the Troll’s nose, his left nostril to be exact. Spotting two hairs that appeared close together she inserted the tweezers. 

 

“Now, its best to just pull one at a ti-gAhH!!” Gorn gasped at an intense tingling pain in his nose. 

 

“Two!” Mia chirped excitedly as she deposited the hairs into the bag with the other. “Just two more to g—“

 

“HHEhh-IIIISSHHHHHHHH!!!” Gorn revealed in the blissful feeling of the sneeze as it brought some relief to his tortured nose. He’d been gripping the chair’s arms and hadn’t had the chance to cover his release, but he did try to minimize the damage by sneezing with his teeth closed. 

 

Mia closed her eyes just in time to feel the cool wet slap of the Troll’s release across her face. 

 

Gorn was quite proud of himself with how much he’d been able to contain his sneeze. Rubbing his nose with his finger, “Excuse me.”

 

“Bless,” Mia squeaked out, opening her eyes to see the Troll itching his nose, which sent a rush of warmth down to heat her belly. 

 

Blinking back the tears that had welled in his eyes, “I’ve never had anyone as enthusiastic as you when its come to plucking my nose hairs,” Gorn chuckled. 

 

“I-I just need them for a potion,” Mia shrugged, hoping to appear indifferent. 

 

“Right,” Gorn nodded as his smile faltered a bit. “What sort of potion are you making?”

 

“A love potion for myself,” Mia answered before thinking. 

 

Gorn’s brows raised in disbelief. “A love potion for yourself? But wh—“

 

To keep the Troll from asking any in-depth questions Mia plucked another nose hair, but in her haste she’d pulled the strand from his right nostril. 

 

“W—Wh— HehHH!!—y—- HaEEHHISHHEEEIOOOOO!!! AEhhHSSSHEEEEEIHUHHHH!! HHhUhH!!! HuHSHEEEIHHHHHH!!” 

 

“Why’s your right more sensitive?” Mia asked over the Trolls loud sneezes. 

 

“I-I think I have... I-I have—- hHeE—IIISHHHEEEEHHIOOOO!!” Gorn sniffled as his nose started to run. “Ughh,” he moaned, “an ingrown hair.” 

 

“Ooooh...” Mia drew out as she looked to the tweezers to see another intact specimen. “Just one more,” She said as she placed it aside with the others. “Now let’s see about that troublesome hair...” 

 

Gorn’s eyes widened and he shifted out of the little Witch’s reach. Shocked already with how she didn’t bat an eye with having been sneezed on numerous times. His kind weren’t known for being dainty with anything, and the mess of the last uncovered fit had left a sheen on the Witch’s face. “Umm—- Y-You don’t have to do that...” 

 

“Nonsense,” Mia said as she waved the Troll to lean back down, “two birds, one stone and all that rot...” Peering inside the Troll’s nostril when he was back into position. 

 

“Why do you need a love potion for yourself?” 

 

Mia sighed having thought she’d skirted having to answer him. Using the tweezers, she poked and prodded the inner nasal walls, causing small undulations. “Because... I haven’t had a suitor come and ask for my hand... so clearly I’m hideous... and thus in need of a potion to attract someone,” she finished as she scratched at a red lump inside the Troll’s nose with the end of the tweezers. 

 

Gorn could feel the little Witch searching for the aggravation in his nose, which did nothing much but make it itch. That is until she hit the sensitive spot. “Th-That’s it,” he breathed as his nostril flared and twitched. 

 

With a determined gleam in her eye, Mia clamped the tweezers down on the barely protruding hair from the irritated mound and yanked. 

 

Gorn blinked as his eyes flooded with tears. Chest heaving as he inhaled deep breaths to fuel the sneezing fit that came barreling right out of him. 

 

Mia stepped back to get out of the Troll’s line of nasal discharge. “Rats,” she murmured as she eyed the tweezers to see that there was no hair between the prongs. 

 

“Thank you,” Gorn sighed in relief as he moved to scratch his nose. Wincing in pain before his nose pulled up and another sneeze sprayed out of him. 

 

“Don’t thank me yet,” Mia said with a weak smile as she stepped forward, going on the tips of her boots to peer back inside Gorn’s nose. 

 

Gorn’s cheeks reddened with embarrassment, with not having a moment to clean himself up before the Witch was looking in his nose again. 

 

Moving some of the slimy tendrils out of her way, Mia looked for the rogue hair. 

 

“A-And you’re not hideous...” Gorn breathed softly. Waving at himself, “This is hideous. You try asking out a cute little witch when you look like this.”

 

Mia snorted, “I dunno... You’re quite cute, actually.” 

 

Gorn snorted himself which caused his breath to hitch. 

 

Mia pulled the tweezers out as she waited for Gorn to either sneeze or for the need to pass. Once the need abated, she went back to her search. 

 

“So if I asked you out?” Gorn murmured, crossing his eyes to watch the little witch. Reluctant to get his hopes up too high.

 

“Are you asking me out?” Mia leaned back to eye the Troll. Watching as he chewed on his lip, endearingly. 

 

“If your answer is ‘yes’ then yes I’m asking... but if it’s ‘no’ then yes I’m still asking.”

 

Mia smiled, the pooled warmth in her tummy doing a flip flop with growing excitement. “Aren’t you a charmer,” She hummed as she leaned forward again spotting the nuisance once again. “Then my answer is yes...” pausing the tweezers on the hair. “I guess I don’t need anymore of your nostril hairs since I don’t need to make a potion anymore...” 

 

“B-But you’re already in there... Might as well pluck it out for me?” Gorn said with a desperate smile. “Please?”

 

“Well since you said ‘please’,” Mia giggled and yanked as hard as she could. “Got the bugger!” She beamed victoriously as she eyed the hair, root and all clutched in the tweezers. 

 

“RAEeh—SSHHHIISHHHHHHOOOO!! Uh-hHuhH!! HE-hTSSHHHHHHHHHH!!!” Sneeze after sneeze blasted out of Gorn. 

 

Mia had scurried to the side of the sitting Troll, watching in awe of the mess he was producing over just a little irritant. 

 

Once the fit was over Gorn fell back into the seat with a tired grin, rubbing his nose. “Oh, that is muuuuch better.”

 

Digging in her skirt pocket Mia pulled out a handkerchief and offered it to the Troll. 

 

Gorn gladly took the petite cloth from the Witch and emptied his nose into it. Looking back at her with adoration as she didn’t seem to mind him and the mess he produced. 

 

“Guess you really were what I wanted after all,” Mia hummed with a wink. 

 

[GroundIntoDust]

This is so cute! I love the premise

[Mr. Black Cherry Berry Tea]

Thanks for writing this! I really enjoyed it. You can never have too many huge loud sneezes lol.

[sneezyfeather338]

So cute 🥰. I’m can’t wait to see what other stories you have in your arsenal.😍🥰😘

[Snez gud]

That was so cute! And those sneezes were just perfect!