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Unlike You Lowley Humans, I Don't Get Sick!


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A fun little anime-inspired story I'm working on about an elf that accidentally ends up on earth and her immune system was not ready for it. There's admittedly a lot of influence from "Elf-san wa Yaserarenai", but I changed enough to essentially make it an original, hence why it's not in fanfiction. 

Anyway, I hope y'all enjoy! 


Chapter 1: She Came From A Tree? 

It was a normal night for Dahlia. Started off her morning at 7am sharp and got ready for class, choosing to wear one of her favorite outfits - a pale blue turtleneck seater and a slight, simple black dress jacket with a pair of black slacks. The college student always preferred to dress simple and conservative, though it often times made it difficult to make friends since it gave many others think of her as a prude.

Dahlia gave it no mind however, as she would much rather focus on her studies anyway. And that she did, spending most of her days either in class or studying in the library. And today was no different.

Well, until she left the library that is.

She always made sure to leave promptly at 10pm, so that she had enough time to get home and get ready for bed. Though as she stepped outside, she found that the wind was blowing at incredible speeds. She instinctively heald up her math textbook in front of her face to avoid hurting her eyes with the intense blast, and contemplated waiting for the odd weather to pass as it shot her short, wavy hair into all sorts of crazy directions.

‘It’s not raining now but it might later, so this might be the best time to head back to the door before it's too late!’ Dahlia decided as she chose to start taking slow, careful steps forward, certain that one wrong step and her lithe frame would be picked up and carried away. She could barely even see where she was going, but luckily she was all too familiar with this route for her to lose her way.


Dahlia froze in place. The distinctly feminine voice seemed to boom overhead, and came from no particular direction. Maybe it was the wind messing with her sound perception, but Dahlia lowered the book just enough to peak around at her surroundings and actually was a bit glad she did, seeing as there was a large tree right in front of her that she had almost ran into.

She almost wanted to continue on and act like she didn’t hear anything, but then her eyes seemed to play tricks on her as well. For it seemed like toward the middle of the tree, in between the shards of outer bark, there was a bit of light shining through. Dahlia rubbed at her eyes and looked again only to see the light growing brighter. 


Another voice boomed around Dahlia, this time a more maculine voice, sounding like it came from someone older while the former had sounded young and childish. It sounded like it was right in her ear, yet distant. It also felt oddly... Not English? She didn’t know how to describe it, it felt like three different languages were echoing in her head at once, but the English one stood out boldly. 

Wide, dark eyes struggled to stay open but could hardly look away as one by one, the shards of the bark popped off and the light grew brighter.

Then, the wind stopped. There was a moment of apprehensive silence before suddenly Dahlia had no choice but to close her eyes as the light from the tree seemed to consume everything around her.

The college student found herself falling - or rather, being pushed? - and as she hit the ground, another body collapsed on top of her with a groan. 

“Ooowwww...” the feminine voice whined. “What kind of idiot stands right in front of a gate?”

Dahlia shot her eyes open, finding her face covered in long, golden blonde hair. The introvert didn’t know what to say as the source of both the feminine voice and the golden hair began to sit up, though without moving off Dahlia.

Silver eyes that had two slit pupils in each eye that intersected in the center like a cross looked down at the young hispanic woman with a disgusted glare. Her hair was thick, curly, and appeared like it would go past her knees if she stood up. All she wore was a lacey black night gown that was sleeveless and barely touched her legs. It looked like she had originally planned on going to bed but instead decided to burst through a tree instead. 

“Well?” the blonde growled. “What do you have to say for yourself, you dumbfounded idiot?”

“Are you cold?”

The blonde blinked. She clearly hadn’t expected that, and neither had Dahlia even though it came out of her own mouth. It was just the beginning of fall and the temperature had fallen to about 53°F (11.5°C) and her outfit seemed far to light for the weather.

The strange girl sighed and stood up, offering a hand for Dahlia, which see accepted as she got up. It was then that she noticed that the blonde’s hair really did got a few inches past her knees, but also that she was dramatically shorter. Dahlia stood at 6’ (183 cm), so she was used to people being shorter than her, but she had somehow expected the strange woman would stand much taller with how proudly she seemed to carry herself.

The much shorter girl didn’t seem intimidated, however, as she pouted at the tan woman before her. “Yes, your planet is colder than I expected. Mine is almost always warm, so I’m much more accustomed to higher temperatures. Bring me to shelter at once and get me warmer garments to wear. 

Dahlia sighed. She wanted to say no, but the poor girl was most likely drunk and, with her looks and that barely-there nightgown, it would be dangerous to leave her out here. Good thing her roommate basically abandoned their dorm a long time ago to live with her boyfriend instead. “Yeah, no problem. There’s an unused bed at my dorm you can borrow as well as my clothes. Though just for tonight, okay?”

The blonde nodded. “Let us make haste then. Lead the way.”

And so Dahlia did, pulling out her phone to see that it was now 10:17. Great - she likely won’t have enough time to read a bit more of her book before bed. 

“What is your name, human?” asked the small girl. 

“Dahlia Catalina Garza,” she answered. “And you?”

“Princess Greta of the Ustria Kingdom on the planet Ismerella,” the blonde replied smoothly. “What planet are we on, anyway?”

Dahlia blinked. “Uhh... Earth?”

“Oh, wow!” Greta blurted out with surprise. “I didn’t think Earth has a world gate!”

“Neither did I,” Dahlia said, just rolling with probably the most creative drunken rambling she ever heard. 

They continued walking in silence for the next ten minutes, before the blonde finally spoke up again. 

"H-how long until we r-reach your h-ho-home?" the small woman asked, her teeth chattering and her hands desperately rubbing her arms to try and stay warm. 

"We're almost there, but here," the Hispanic woman took off her coat and handed it over to the blonde who basically ripped it out of her arms to quickly wrap herself in it. "It's pretty thin so it's not that warm on its own, but I figure it's better than what you're working with at the moment."

"T-took you l-l-long enough," Greta complained with a pout, the jacket hanging around her frame as it overwhelmed her small frame. 

When they finally arrived at the dormitory, they were greeted by the normal grouping of students with laptops and textbooks out, all of them struggling to share the same Hotspot from one of the few broke adults with unlimited data. 

As the two women went to walk past them, a man started to hitch and quickly snapped his head away from his study group - and right in their direction. 

"hheeee... HEEEEEI'TCHUU!!"

Both of them were splattered by the sudden, unprotected sneeze, but Greta more so since she stood closer to him. 

"SSSNNNNFF, I'b so sorry, by bose has just been drivib be crazy abd I didb't know you two were there."

Dahlia couldn't help but notice how congested he sounded. It seems it was that time of the year again when the campus became germ-central. 

Greta glared at the poor guy before he quickly turned back to his project. 

When they finally made it to her dorm, Greta all but collapsed in a random bed (that luckily for Dahlia, wasn't hers ) and buried herself in the covers before promptly falling into a deep slumber. 

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This is so cool! And such an interesting concept! Greta is hilariously demanding. Looking forward to the next part! 

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  • 1 month later...

Sorry it's been so long, but I'm surprised to see so many comments! Hopefully this new chapter doesn't disappoint haha


Chapter 2: Concern for a Strange Girl

The next morning, Dahlia woke up bright and early with the sound of her alarm, which was simply a soft, low-fi song. Sitting up and looking over, she noticed that the strange girl was still curled up in her blanket burrito. Most of her hair was on the outside of the blanket, so it practically covered most of the bed in strings of gold.

Figuring that she needed more rest after last night, the college student simply got up quietly to take a shower and get ready for the day. While getting dressed, she decided on a lilac turtleneck with simple, black flowers and a long black skirt that went down to her ankles. 

Dahlia silently stepped over to the bedside of Greta, leaning down a bit to take a better look at her. Now that she was looking at her from the side, her face seemed... odd? She appeared like a normal person, but the bone structure felt rather odd somehow. Dahlia majored in forensic science, so keeping an eye out for these kinds of things were second nature for her. 

The taller woman then noticed what seemed to be an odd lump in her hair along the side. Curiosity taking over, she reached out a hand and gently shifted the silky hair, nearly letting out a loud gaspo at the sight.

Hidden beneath a sea of gold, a long, pointed ear stood out. If it were smaller, Dahlia would assume it was simply one of those cosmetic surgeries people go through. But rather, her ear looked like it one you would see at a Renaissance Fair. The hispanic girl couldn’t help but reach out again, touching the pointed tips of the ear.

Dahlia jerked her hand back, not expecting how warm and real the felt, as the ear began to twitch and the small woman groaned slightly, quickly followed by a wet sniffle. She quickly shifted from curiosity to concern, reaching out to place the back of her hand on Greta’s forehead. “Oh no, she’s burning up!”

The tall girl stood up and rushed over to her medicine cabinet in the bathroom, two Nyquill tablets, wetting a washcloth, and running back over to Greta with a cup of water. Carefully, she pulled back the covers so that she could lift the small girl into a sitting position. “Greta, can you hear me?”

A groan was all she got in response.

“Okay Greta, I’m going to need you to take these pills and drink some water. I promise, they will make you feel much better. Okay?”

Another groan.

“I’m going to put the first pill in your mouth and then give you some water to drink, okay?” Dahlia informed the weak girl before popping in the first pill between cracked lips, followed up by gently and slowly pouring in a bit of water. Some of the water dribbled off to the side, but she heard her gulp and hoped the pill was with it. 

“Here’s the second,” she warned before slipping in another Nyquil, sure to follow it up with more water. Letting Greta drink as much as she could before laying her back down in bed, pulling up the covers, cleaning up the spilled water, and laying the wet washcloth on top of her forehead. 

Dahlia bit her lip, looking down at her phone to see that it was soon time for her to head to class. The thought of skipping class had never occurred to her until today, but it's not like she was going to act on it. No instead she grabbed her notepad, left a note and a glass of water on the nightstand, and headed out to class with a head full of worry. 


Everything hurt. Everything burned. Greta had heard of how common it was for some people to experience a strange illness when traveling via world gate, but never heard anything about it being this bad. 

The strange girl attempted to open her eyes and was glad to see that the large light above her was off, the only thing illuminating the darkness being the slight slivers of sunlight peeking through the curtains. Night had passed and, judging by the strength of the sunlight, had passed quite a while ago. 

Her pupils widened until they mostly consumed her silver irises as her sight adjusted to the darkness. Everything was still swirling and it was difficult to think, but the golden blonde managed to notice what appeared to be a note left on the table beside the bed. 

Greta reached over to grab it, grimacing at how much it ached her body to even do such a simple movement, and looked down at the strange alphabet before her that she faintly remembered seeing in her textbooks.

“That’s right, I’m on Earth now,” the elf mumbled to herself in her native tongue. “I have to try and figure out their local languages.”

Greta furrowed her brow as she thought about how that human man was saying something in a tongue unfamiliar before he... spit(?) all over her, but that the other girl, Dahlia, had no problems communicating in Ustron. Did Earth have a language similar to Greta’s first?

Before she could think more on it, her pale and delicate features began to contort against her control. The princess couple barely keep her eyes open as a strange, ticklish feeling filled her nose and she struggled to breath with her mouth, which hung open and hitched with desperation. 

“Hehh... HA--ahhh... W-whaa... heeeET’CHIEW!!”

‘What just happened? What was that?’ was all Greta could think before that same odd contortion returned along with that strange feeling.

“Hii-heeeh-hi’TXEW! ET-CHIEW! Aaaah...TIEW!”

Quick bursts of small, high pitch sounds filled the air along with thousands of moist particles that flew freely through the cramped dorm room. 

Greta collapsed back on the small bed beneath her, exhausted so much from that strange event that she quickly was consumed by the darkness again. 


Dahlia barely remembered anything her professor said the entire lecture. Always the student that sat in the front row and rarely looked at anything other than her professor and her notes, today Dahlia sat as close to the exit as she could and was looking at her phone nearly every minute to see how much longer before she could head back to the dorm to check up on the strange girl in her roommate's bed. 

As soon as the professor dismissed them, the tan girl grabbed all of her things and made a beeline for the door and somehow managed to be the first person out. Her mind was full of concern over the bad fever Greta had, whether or not she knew the girl that well or what she was didn’t matter in the moment. 

When Dahlia made it back to the dorm, she rushed right over to the sick girl’s side to feel her forehead. It was still far too hot.

Just as the student was starting to get up to get more medicine, a surprisingly strong pale fist gripped her wrist.

“What... is... woong... wif be...?” the strange girl struggled to ask, her sore throat and nose thickly congested working so she couldn’t even pronounce the words right. 

“You’re sick, probably just a cold,” Dahlia told her with a nervous smile, trying to act like everything was fine.

For a brief moment, the haunty attitude from last night seemed to flash across the pale one’s hazey eyes once more, before they seemed to loose focus a bit as her nose twitched. “Ehh... Elves bon’t... gee-EH-t sick...eh-EH-espshcially not... hehh... highhhh elvv--EH’TXIEW!”

Dahlia didn’t have time to react before the short girl sneezed directly into her face, feeling that there was at least one thick piece of snot sitting directly on her cheek. She just sat there frozen for a moment, thinking about all the tests she had coming up, before responding “Well, I don’t know what to tell you cause you’re definitely sick. I’m going to get you some more medicine and wash my face in the hope that does anything for me.”

Greta seemed too exhausted to care as her eyes drifted close and her grip on the student’s wrist loosened. 

The tan girl sighed. What did she do to end up in this mess?

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