SomeoneCurious Posted May 5, 2020 Share Posted May 5, 2020 (edited) Hey, I haven't never been in a relationship before, but I have big concerns about how am I going to have sex with the partner I'll be attracted to. I mean, I can recieve a sexual arousal almost exclusively by observing or imagining sneezing. I'm really afraid by not being able to function properly during sex. Does anybody have any similar experiences about having sex with non-fetishist people? Any tips, tricks? Please, I don't know if I'm overreacting about all of that, but I'm really really nervous about that. Edited May 7, 2020 by SneezyHolmes Link to comment
SomeoneCurious Posted May 5, 2020 Author Share Posted May 5, 2020 By the way, I'm 18. Link to comment
SomeoneCurious Posted May 5, 2020 Author Share Posted May 5, 2020 Sorry, I meant "I have never been in a relationship before..." 😂 Link to comment
Leas Posted May 5, 2020 Share Posted May 5, 2020 (edited) I had this problem, I spoke to my partner about it and we bring sneezing into it sometimes. The best advice I can give you is to talk about it, if you feel comfortable and when the time comes. Try not to worry about it too much. edit: reworded so suitable for under 18’s (thought was in adult board) Edited May 5, 2020 by Leas Link to comment
March Hare Posted May 5, 2020 Share Posted May 5, 2020 Right. So, I don't want to sound like some dismissive Granny Obvious, but I think I'm going to, a bit. Nevertheless, this is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth: Your sexual identity framework is only in its first stages of revolution right now. Right now, you can't get turned on by anything that doesn't involve sneezing. (I was exactly like that before I had ever been sexual with another human, and I'm pretty dang sure we're far from the only ones.) One of these time-measurement units, however, when we have finally adjusted to this frkn new virus in the world... you'll meet someone and you'll fall for each other and DO THE THING together and it'll be awkward and interesting and scary and UH-MAZING and maybe you'll be too overjoyed by having them so close to worry about how you function and maybe you will function beyond your wildest dreams because you discover that [act] or [body part] turns you on just as much as sneezing does. Heck, maybe your first one (or your second or any-th) will turn out to have honeymoon rhinitis, in which case you'll be in heaven and you will have to tell us all about it ! Now, one thing is INCREDIBLY important to remember: it does. not. matter. in. the. very. slightest. how old you are when you have sex with another human for the first time. I was nineteen. My friend X was twenty-six. My friend Y was sixteen. My relative Q was thirty. My relative Z was twenty-seven. My friend J... well, you get the point. You won't be the worse at it the longer you wait, or the better at it the sooner it happens. Talk to your people, read up, embark upon the journey of discovery. There are many wonderful sources of knowledge and perspective out there: scarleteen dot com is a great place to start. You're fine. Link to comment
Sitruuna Posted May 5, 2020 Share Posted May 5, 2020 Do you want it or do you just want to want it? Like it's fine if this is something you are concerned about because sex is something you actually want to have but most of us kinda do live in a society where the idea that sex is an important part of every (romantic) relationship is being pushed at us constantly. I don't have any tips or tricks to give because I don't care about having sex with anyone, it's just not for me. I guess I just wanted to make sure you know it's genuinely fine for sex to not be a part of every relationship and that when you are in a situation where it might become a thing, you don't need to have any answers ready. It's hard to know for certain what you will enjoy before you try it. Also not every sexual relationship is the same, it can be what ever feels the best for you and your partner(s) (within legal boundaries etc of course). Link to comment
RB Posted May 6, 2020 Share Posted May 6, 2020 10 hours ago, March Hare said: Right. So, I don't want to sound like some dismissive Granny Obvious, but I think I'm going to, a bit. Nevertheless, this is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth: Your sexual identity framework is only in its first stages of revolution right now. Right now, you can't get turned on by anything that doesn't involve sneezing. (I was exactly like that before I had ever been sexual with another human, and I'm pretty dang sure we're far from the only ones.) One of these time-measurement units, however, when we have finally adjusted to this frkn new virus in the world... you'll meet someone and you'll fall for each other and DO THE THING together and it'll be awkward and interesting and scary and UH-MAZING and maybe you'll be too overjoyed by having them so close to worry about how you function and maybe you will function beyond your wildest dreams because you discover that [act] or [body part] turns you on just as much as sneezing does. Heck, maybe your first one (or your second or any-th) will turn out to have honeymoon rhinitis, in which case you'll be in heaven and you will have to tell us all about it ! Now, one thing is INCREDIBLY important to remember: it does. not. matter. in. the. very. slightest. how old you are when you have sex with another human for the first time. I was nineteen. My friend X was twenty-six. My friend Y was sixteen. My relative Q was thirty. My relative Z was twenty-seven. My friend J... well, you get the point. You won't be the worse at it the longer you wait, or the better at it the sooner it happens. Talk to your people, read up, embark upon the journey of discovery. There are many wonderful sources of knowledge and perspective out there: scarleteen dot com is a great place to start. You're fine. Quite possibly the smartest thing ever written here. Link to comment
C-Money Posted May 6, 2020 Share Posted May 6, 2020 15 hours ago, March Hare said: Right. So, I don't want to sound like some dismissive Granny Obvious, but I think I'm going to, a bit. Nevertheless, this is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth: Your sexual identity framework is only in its first stages of revolution right now. Right now, you can't get turned on by anything that doesn't involve sneezing. (I was exactly like that before I had ever been sexual with another human, and I'm pretty dang sure we're far from the only ones.) One of these time-measurement units, however, when we have finally adjusted to this frkn new virus in the world... you'll meet someone and you'll fall for each other and DO THE THING together and it'll be awkward and interesting and scary and UH-MAZING and maybe you'll be too overjoyed by having them so close to worry about how you function and maybe you will function beyond your wildest dreams because you discover that [act] or [body part] turns you on just as much as sneezing does. Heck, maybe your first one (or your second or any-th) will turn out to have honeymoon rhinitis, in which case you'll be in heaven and you will have to tell us all about it ! Now, one thing is INCREDIBLY important to remember: it does. not. matter. in. the. very. slightest. how old you are when you have sex with another human for the first time. I was nineteen. My friend X was twenty-six. My friend Y was sixteen. My relative Q was thirty. My relative Z was twenty-seven. My friend J... well, you get the point. You won't be the worse at it the longer you wait, or the better at it the sooner it happens. Talk to your people, read up, embark upon the journey of discovery. There are many wonderful sources of knowledge and perspective out there: scarleteen dot com is a great place to start. You're fine. This was an awesome response to this question! Link to comment
Woodsie Posted May 6, 2020 Share Posted May 6, 2020 Find some one open minded and wanting to explore with you. Best thing that ever happened was sharing this with my partner. Link to comment
Travel Posted May 7, 2020 Share Posted May 7, 2020 On 5/5/2020 at 7:36 AM, March Hare said: Right. So, I don't want to sound like some dismissive Granny Obvious, but I think I'm going to, a bit. Nevertheless, this is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth: Your sexual identity framework is only in its first stages of revolution right now. Right now, you can't get turned on by anything that doesn't involve sneezing. (I was exactly like that before I had ever been sexual with another human, and I'm pretty dang sure we're far from the only ones.) One of these time-measurement units, however, when we have finally adjusted to this frkn new virus in the world... you'll meet someone and you'll fall for each other and DO THE THING together and it'll be awkward and interesting and scary and UH-MAZING and maybe you'll be too overjoyed by having them so close to worry about how you function and maybe you will function beyond your wildest dreams because you discover that [act] or [body part] turns you on just as much as sneezing does. Heck, maybe your first one (or your second or any-th) will turn out to have honeymoon rhinitis, in which case you'll be in heaven and you will have to tell us all about it ! Now, one thing is INCREDIBLY important to remember: it does. not. matter. in. the. very. slightest. how old you are when you have sex with another human for the first time. I was nineteen. My friend X was twenty-six. My friend Y was sixteen. My relative Q was thirty. My relative Z was twenty-seven. My friend J... well, you get the point. You won't be the worse at it the longer you wait, or the better at it the sooner it happens. Talk to your people, read up, embark upon the journey of discovery. There are many wonderful sources of knowledge and perspective out there: scarleteen dot com is a great place to start. You're fine. Thank you for this post, March. I'm going through something sort of similar to OP and was feeling a bit bummed about it, but this really helped. Link to comment
snzmn2016 Posted May 7, 2020 Share Posted May 7, 2020 Well said March!!! As you get to know your partner better, you will find other things you like Link to comment
Roza Posted May 7, 2020 Share Posted May 7, 2020 You will function properly. Imagining will help at first even if you don't want to share your thing and induce. Later on, pleasure MAY come naturally, even with """""normal stuff""""" (can I stress the quote-quote more??), but that depends on the bond you will create with your partner and on the actual, physical attraction. If it's not this one, it's going to be the next and so on. Hope this helps. Enjoy your journey of discovering yourself and don't let stress take anything away from you. It is truly amazing Link to comment
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