Sailing the High Sneeze

[Sawdust]

Before we get into the story. This is my first story ever and I literally was thinking about it lying in bed. I got out of bed and here I am typing. When you have an idea I guess you run with it. This story does not pretend to be historically accurate or a good representation of the English language LOL. Probably the only story I will ever write but meh we will see. Enjoy!

Sailing the High Sneeze

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Horace was on watch looking out into the deep blue water, listening to the seagulls overhead. This has been his routine for weeks as he joined the crew on one of the Feather Merchant Company's sailing ships. The company was advertising through the town crier in his small port town along the southern coast. "Lads wanted to sail to the new colonies" he recalled "Lodging, Food and coin for the strong". The Feather Merchant Navy was looking for sailors, or sailors-to-be more accurately. Three weeks into his journey Horace was a fine sailor with a medium build figure, a growing beard and a fresh tan.

Horace's trance was broken by a familiar sound "Haatch-ew, HAAaatch-EW, HAATCHEW". At every mid-day he heard these sounds. "HAATCH-EW, HAATCH-EW, HATCH-EW". It was the Skipper of the day crew sneezing in threes as he exited the lower levels of the ship. It was so consistent Horace was able to tell the time of day and know when it was time for his turn at watch to end.

A quick learner, Horace excelled at the tasks required of him by the company but always loved his time on watch. His wanderlust is what brought him out of the farmstead his family tended to. He volunteered to head into the town delivering wheat and cattle so he could see the sights. It was his wanderlust that made him sign up after hearing the town crier's speech every morn. It was his inquisitiveness that lead him to suspect what was ailing his Skip.

The day Skipper was an older gentleman and a true veteran of the sea who had the trust of his crew. He had a warm personality and was welcoming to new recruits such as Horace. On one of his first watch shifts Horace asked if the Skip lost his eye. The Skip laughed exclaiming "No my boy! This patch is so I can always have one eye for thee dark and one eye for thee light. I was taught this trick from my captain when I was new sailor." The Skip taught many tricks to sailing to the recruits but Horace was the first one to ask about his eye. At the time he thought nothing of it. However as the journey moved along the watch shifts were broken by same "HAATCH-EW, HAATCH-EW, HATCH-EWWWWW". The Skip was in good health, he had no cough, no shivers, no fever, his voice was powerful and not strained. So why did the Skip sneeze when he exited the ship's lower levels?

The question stumped Horace but he did not bring up such personal matters with the Skip. He was there to learn his job and perform it well for the good of his fellow mates. He was not there to worry about phantom illnesses that spread quicker than flames on a ship. As the weeks went on Horace got promoted and started spending time performing tasks beyond just watch. One task required him to enter and exit the belly of the ship. He asked the Skip if he could fashion him a patch for his eye so he would not bumble around while working on the lower decks. After all, part of the reason that Horace got promoted was the man doing this job prior tripped on some stray rope injuring himself. On Horace's first shift down below the Skip provided him his patch he made from some spare cloth. Horace was pleased even though the patch was a much less aesthetically pleasing white cloth versus the Skip's black cloth.

His new job kept him busy and many of the tasks are located on the lower deck took and these tasks took quite some time. Other tasks required him to go to the top deck. The first time exiting the lower deck he felt a strange feeling. A tickle in his nose. What's this? "Attchhooo. Atchhhhoooo" Horace sneezed twice. A flurry of thoughts raced in his mind. What just happened? He continued with his tasks for sometime on the top deck before returning to the lower levels. He met the day Skip on his way up and as the door closed behind him he heard the familiar "hatchew, hatchew, HHATTTCHEW" but muffled through the thick door. Horace was starting to wonder... was the patch the source for what ails the Skip? Did the patch cause Horace's sneezes? Horace raced back up top. Nothing. He tried again. Nothing.

Horace laid out the situation in his journal. "The Skip always sneezes exiting the lower deck. I sneezed one less time but also when I exited the lower deck. The patch is a common item on us both. Neither of us are ill. I did not sneeze on repeated exits." Writing in his journal took some time as the light is poor down below with only the flicker of lanterns breaking the darkness. Horace decided to bring up his findings with the Skip. As he exited the lower decks "Atttchhooo, Atchhhooo". "It happened again, but not every time. I do not understand!"

Horace raced over to the Skip's position at the wheel. He explained his observations and theory to the Skip.  The Skip, a Veteran of over 50 crossings, laughed "Horace my Lad, its not the eye patch. It's the Sun." The Skip removed his eye patch and looked into the sky with his previously covered eye ""HAATCH-EW, HAATCH-EW, HATCH-EWWWWW". Horace removed his patch as well parroting the Skip's actions "ATCHOO, ATCHOOOOO".

It was Horace's time to laugh. He has been sailing for only a few weeks and he thought he knew something the Skip didn't. "I have so much to learn" Horace said. "It took me 3 years and two ships to figure that out." The Skip Replied. "You had it almost on your first journey."

Horace smiled and went back to work as his tasks weren't yet complete due to his sneezing adventure and the ship was due to reach the new colonies later that day.

Edited February 20, 2022 by Sawdust

[Chanel_no5]

I don't typically read male fics, but the title intrigued me so I did anyway. And I really liked it! You set the tone and atmosphere very efficiently, and although it's quite a short story your characters feel like real people and they're immediately likeable. A very unique idea, well executed, and you write very, very well. I hope this won't be your only fic, but the first of many. Great job!  

[Sawdust]

Honestly I don't read male either. I just had an idea and despite liking female I wrote a male fic. I am probably a short story specialist because I get bored of something relatively quickly and abandon projects at the drop of a hat. As I mentioned in the blurb I literally wrote it after crawling out of bed because I thought it was interesting. I was hoping 2am brain would convey things clearly and it seems at least 1 person agrees. I have always considered myself a decent writer even though I haven't written anything here or outside of here. I don't really read much either. Guess I'm just creative like that. 🤷‍♂️

 

Thanks for the kind words. ☺️Who knows what's down the pipeline but I would not make any bets lol. I hope someone catches that I named the shipping company Feather Merchant Company. I could not resist the urge for some classic sneeze trope cheese even if it's a throwaway reference.

Edited February 20, 2022 by Sawdust

[Snez gud]

Aw, that was really cute!

[Sawdust]

Not sure what forum etiquette to this is in regards to thanking everyone who comments but. Thank you glad you enjoyed it!