Hidden Desires - (4 Parts)

[Love_2_Sneeze_666]

Apologizing in advance for the longness and serious lack of sneezes in this part I may continue this, we'll see. Hope you all enjoy!

The soft glow of the sunset reflected amber warmth on her face as her sapphire eyes took in the brilliance of her surroundings. Each individual leaf on the trees shone gold, giving the forest around her a majestic, almost magical atmosphere. She closed her eyes and lost herself in the wind that swirled her ebony hair around, dancing with the breeze. A smile played on the girl’s soft lips and her lavender garments gracefully merged with the wind, tumbling this way and that.

"Heshhuh!"

Her thoughts were interrupted by a sudden sneeze, snapping her out of her memories and back to reality. Sara glanced down at the hospital bed to her left, her gaze meeting that of the man currently occupying it. She smiled warmly and briefly admired his handsome face, replaying the sneeze in her mind. He only returned her smile with an indifferent look that seemed to pass right through her as he rubbed a finger underneath his nose.

“Bless you. Can I get you anything? A tissue, perhaps?” She asked him. His name was Tanner. Twenty-six years old, stunning eyes so dark they appeared black, a gorgeous, long, auburn mane, and a handsome, masculine nose with the slightest bend in the bridge. He had survived a car accident only two days earlier, and was lucky to have suffered only two broken limbs and a few minor scrapes and bruises. Tanner was in the passenger’s seat at the time, which resulted in the breaking of both his right leg and arm. Unfortunately, the driver was not so lucky. The man passed away only a few hours after they had brought him hastily to the emergency room.

Sara didn’t know the particulars about the accident. She never did, being that she was a nurse and not a doctor. She knew only what her patients told her, or what she heard from the other doctors. This didn’t bother her in the least, however, as she was in this field to heal others as best she could, not to investigate how they had gotten injured.

Tanner sniffled once and shook his head, lowering his eyes to the plain white bedspread. Sara had noticed that he was a man who kept to himself mostly. In fact, she hadn’t heard him speak more than a few words since he’d come into her care. And when he did speak, it was only to confirm or deny his symptoms, or to respond that he had no appetite when asked.

Sara went about with her tasks. She routinely checked Tanner’s blood pressure, heart rate, that kind of thing. She asked if there was anything more he needed, but Tanner continued to study the loose cotton blanket covering his legs instead of offering any answer. Sara took his silence as a ‘no’, and took a step towards the door when Tanner cleared his throat and said softly “Wait,” Sara almost didn’t hear him.

“Yes?” Tanner hesitated. Not because he wasn’t sure what to say next, but because he was afraid to ask the question that constantly kept him awake during the night. Or maybe he was more afraid of the answer.

“Do you know the condition of the driver?” He asked, his dark eyes flicking up to meet Sara’s. She flinched. So no one had told him that the driver of the vehicle was dead. Sara came up beside him and gingerly sat on the chair seated there. She was uncertain as to how to begin, so she just came right out and said it.

“The driver of the car you were in,” She hesitated, taking a small breath, “is dead.” Tanner’s face seemed to crumple up at this news. He inhaled sharply, turning his face away and held his breath. Sara didn’t know what to do, so she gently placed a hand on his uninjured leg and whispered, “I’m sorry.” Tanner didn’t respond. He only nodded, keeping his head turned the other way. Sara realized he was trying not to let her see him cry and something in her just melted. She’d always had a soft spot for vulnerable men. Seeing Tanner in his weakened, injured condition and now on the edge of tears, added to his earlier sneeze, was affecting Sara greatly. She sat beside him, absentmindedly rubbing her hand along Tanner’s leg in a comforting manner.

After a few moments, Tanner seemed to regain his composure and turned to face Sara. His eyes were reddened, but Sara made no comment. She noticed Tanner’s nose beginning to run and reached for a tissue on the desk, placing it in his hand. He blew his nose softly and tossed the used tissue away.

“How did you know him?” She asked cautiously, afraid of her question being too personal but unable to keep it from passing her lips. Tanner took in a shaky breath before responding.

“He was my father,” He said. His tone was flat and dull, but his voice was thick and deep, filled with despair. Sara’s breath caught when she heard this. Tanner’s eyes flicked around the room, not seeing a thing in it, until they rested on Sara. They lingered on her face, although Sara honestly couldn’t tell if he was really looking at her, or if he was lost in his own thoughts as she had previously been. Their black depths seemed to settle just below Sara’s crystalline eyes.

“Tanner,” He glanced into her eyes, “I’m so sorry.” He resigned himself to looking again at the bedspread. “If there’s anything I can do, anything at all,” He shook his head; the auburn locks swaying softly before drooping down again, seemingly weighed down by Tanner’s grief.

Sensing he needed time alone, Sara stood and walked out of the room, casting one final glance at her patient before exiting. A single tear had found its way onto Tanner’s soft cheek and was making its way down his face. Sara’s heart bled for him. She unconsciously brought a hand to her heart before closing the heavy wooden door with a soft click.

Sara took her forty-five minute break shortly after leaving Tanner and made her way to the lady’s room, wanting to be alone with her thoughts for a while. Seeing Tanner’s reaction to the news of his father’s passing brought back painful memories of her own parents’ deaths. It was nearly six years now since the fire, but the memory still remained fresh in her mind. Sara closed her eyes and remembered the cottage she once called home. Surrounding it was the most beautiful forest you could imagine. There were no factories or highways obstructing the view. There was only the pure, natural grace of the outdoors. Her great-great grandfather built their home years earlier out of the wood of the surrounding trees. Sara had lived there all her life. Being an only child, it was just her and her parents. It was perfect.

The day of the fire was no different from any other. Sara was watching the sunset, enjoying the soft caresses of the wind on her face. This was what she was recalling back in Tanner’s room. She remembered how good it felt to have the cool wind pass over her so freely. That’s when she heard the screams. Her mother’s voice rang out clear as a bell over the forest and found Sara. She didn’t even remember running back to the cottage. All she could remember was the sight of her beloved home drowning in orange and red of the flames. She remembered the purples and pinks of the sunset consumed by the thick black smoke. She remembered the tortured screams of her parents from within. After that, all Sara could recall was waking up in the back of an ambulance with someone dressed like a fireman holding her hand and talking to a paramedic who was also in the back of the vehicle. She’d filled in the blanks based on what others told her.

According to the firemen, Sara had run into the house in an attempt to save her parents. They’d found her unconscious in one of the front rooms, covered in soot, but still breathing. She was lucky the fire hadn’t gotten to her before the firemen did, or she wouldn’t be here right now. They wouldn’t have even known about the fire if a nearby tourist hadn’t seen the smoke and alerted them.

After the fire was out and it was safe to venture inside the charred cottage again, they’d found the bodies of Sara’s parents. They were in the farthest room of the cottage, evidently trying to find a way out before the fire found them. Sara had only been seventeen. After that, she had come to live with her forty-seven year old Aunt Grace in the city. Her aunt was the only living family member she had left now. Her aunt had been diagnosed with breast cancer a few years after Sara moved in with her. She had been put on chemotherapy and it seemed to work fine for the time. Recently, however, Sara was getting calls from her aunt’s doctor saying that the treatment was beginning to fail.

That’s why she took a job as a nurse. Even as a child, she had always wanted to help others. She felt fulfilled and needed in this line of work. Getting to care for the occasional cute guy was a bonus, especially if those guys were sneezy. Those were, she assumed, her two fetishes: sneezing and vulnerability. Nobody knew about this aspect of her life; she really didn’t have anyone to tell. That was just how she liked it. She kept her life private, sharing her thoughts and feelings only with her diary. Sara would have been willing to talk with her Aunt Grace, but she was barely capable of waking up each morning. She didn’t need anything complicating her life any more than necessary.

Sara glanced in the bathroom mirror only to have her view obstructed by tears. She hadn’t realized she was crying. Sara sighed softly and grabbed some paper towel to dry her eyes with. She pushed back her feelings and went back to work, deciding she wasn’t hungry enough to eat anything.

Sara went home that night exhausted both emotionally and physically. She’d just worked a double-shift and had memories of the fire swirling around her head throughout the rest of the day. She fed her tabby, appropriately named Starlight because of her gray coat, peppered with white splotches resembling stars in the night sky, who showed her appreciation by nuzzling Sara’s ankles and purring softly. She then checked her e-mail, entered her latest entry in her diary, noting her visit with Tanner, and decided to get some sleep. Her Aunt Grace was staying overnight at the hospital, so Sara had the place to herself tonight. Aunt Grace didn’t go to the hospital Sara was employed at, but one several blocks away. She claimed the one doctor who knew what he was doing worked there, and refused to be treated anywhere else by anyone else.

Starlight came into Sara’s room and made herself comfy at the foot of her bed, waiting for Sara to get in as well. Sara smiled and climbed in, eager to get some rest. She was looking forward to checking up on Tanner again tomorrow and fell asleep replaying the sound of his sneeze in her head over and over.

Work the next day was absolute chaos for Sara. She was swamped throughout the morning and was unable to see Tanner until after lunch. She entered the room, opening the door quietly in case he was asleep. She found him sitting up with the television turned on, but he wasn’t facing it. Instead, he was staring intently at the door, as if he was expecting someone. She smiled at him and took a seat in the chair next to his bed. Tanner’s eyes were slightly crimson, and his nose also looked a little pinkish. He sniffled and rubbed a knuckle against his nose in an irritated way. Sara took in the way his entire body seemed to be pulled downward and how his face was so completely devoid of anything other than weariness and sadness. He wasn’t looking directly at her, but something in the way he shifted on the hard mattress beneath him to point his body towards Sara made her feel as if Tanner wanted her there.

“How are you today, Tanner?” She asked him softly. He shrugged with his good arm and cleared his throat but said nothing. “Is there anything you need?” He shook his head to indicate there wasn’t. Sara was somewhat disappointed by his lack of communication. She tried to think of something to say to him, but when she caught sight of his chest heaving silently beneath the light blue nightshirt all patients were expected to wear, she froze. She was hypnotized by the way Tanner’s nostrils flared and how he brought up one hand to cup over his mouth and nose. She marveled at how helpless he looked, his expression one of desire to sneeze and be rid of the tickles that tormented and tortured his nose. His breath hitched twice before the sneezes overtook him.

“Huh….Hushh! Ushhh! Huhshh! Huh…Heshh! Eshh! Heshoo! Eshooo! Hepshoo! Ushh! Heishh! Eshh!” They were quick, rapid sneezes, allowing Tanner barely a breath between them. Each one forcing him forwards slightly, his long hair falling in his face. They were full, desperate-sounding, wet sneezes, each one sounding harsher than the last. He held his hand far enough from his face that Sara could see his nose twitch right before the sneeze forced itself out and jerked Tanner forward again. If Sara’s mouth hadn’t gone dry when she say the fit beginning to build, she was sure she’d be drooling by now. Tanner began to recover, sniffling a few times.

“Here,” Sara handed him a few tissues. He nodded his thanks and blew his nose softly, his cheeks colored slightly.

“Sorry ‘bout that,” Tanner said quietly, obviously embarrassed. Sara forced herself to stop staring and reply.

“Don’t be,” Sara barely managed to get the words out of her mouth. She cleared her throat and looked back at Tanner. His gaze was fixed firmly downwards, his cheeks still a rosy hue. Sara smiled to herself and offered Tanner another tissue, but he only shook his head.

“No thanks,” He said even softer than before. He coughed a few times into his closed fist and asked Sara for a drink of water. She gladly gave him one, grateful he wasn’t too embarrassed to speak to her. It was then that she noticed that the coloring of his cheeks hadn’t disappeared yet, as it normally should have by now. She realized that his cheeks had looked a little pink when she entered the room as well. Maybe it wasn’t due to his embarrassment. It could be because of a fever. Sara quickly laid the back of her hand against Tanner’s cheek to see for herself. Tanner flinched when she moved so quickly and brought her hand so close to his face. Sara stifled a giggle and apologized.

“I want to see if you’ve got a fever, that’s all,” She told him reassuringly. He did feel warm to her, and her eyes glazed over with concern. “Tanner, you’re warm,” She said in a puzzled voice, “How do you feel?” He cleared his throat again and took a sip of his water before he listed off his symptoms.

“Leg hurts, arm hurts, hurts to swallow, sneezing, head hurts a bit too,” Sara made a mental note to get him some medication for his newer symptoms.

“I see, and what have you eaten today?” Tanner motioned towards his little cup of water. “And?” He hesitated, thinking it over.

“Toast at lunch.” He reported. Well it’s no wonder he’s getting sick if that’s his daily nutrition, Sara thought.

“How did you sleep last night?”

“Not well,” Tanner reluctantly admitted. Sara couldn’t believe her good luck. Not only did she get to care for this handsome guy, but now he was coming down with a cold! From the looks of it, it was going to be a sneezy one at that. She tried to keep from grinning in front of her patient. Not that it really mattered, considering his eyes were still locked to the white blanket. Sara didn’t want him to suffer, either. He’d been through enough as it was.

“Tanner,” Once again, hearing his own name gave him the courage to raise his eyes and meet Sara’s gaze, “do you think it’s possible you’re coming down with a cold?” He sighed and nodded, his gaze dropping again. “Tanner…” Sara hesitated. Why had she said his name aloud? She quickly scanned the room, looking for inspiration as to what to say. It was then that she noticed that there was nothing in Tanner’s room to cheer him up. No flowers, no cards, nothing.

“What?” He was looking at her with intense, questioning eyes.

“Tanner, do you know if someone has contacted your family yet?” They should have, Sara thought, it’s been three days now since he’s been here. Tanner looked away and swallowed, wincing as he did.

“Yeah, my grandfather. He’s out of the country on a business trip.”

“Is there anyone else we could call? Someone closer?” Sara asked him. Tanner swallowed, wincing again, and shook his head.

“Oh,” Sara replied softly, unsure of what to say to this. Tanner closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the stiff pillow behind him.

“Here, let me make this a little more comfortable for you,” Sara offered, grateful for a chance to change the subject. She gently pushed Tanner’s head up and away from the pillow so she could fluff it for him. Then she moved away and sat back down on the chair, allowing him to lay down again. “Better?” She asked.

“Mhmm,” Tanner sighed softly and opened his eyes again, fixing them on Sara’s. “Thanks.” He said quietly. Sara nodded and smiled at him. For the first time, Tanner smiled back. It was the first time she’d seen him smile since he got here, and she couldn’t blame him. She couldn’t help but notice how much more handsome he was when he smiled. When Tanner’s smile faded, it was replaced by a peaceful, tranquil expression. Also one Sara hadn’t seen during her time with him. Tanner’s eyes began to close and his breathing became steady and even. Within a few minutes he had fallen asleep right there beside her. Poor guy, she thought, he must be exhausted. She sat by his side for a couple of minutes, watching over him as he slept blissfully. His face looked so relaxed. Tanner looked even more handsome now that he wasn’t lost in his troubled thoughts. Without thinking about it, Sara stood up and leaned over him to kiss his forehead, but stopped herself when she realized what she was doing. Instead, Sara ran her fingers through his silky hair and stroked his cheek softly. She was pleasantly surprised when Tanner subconsciously leaned into her soothing touch and a smile began to dance on his lips. Sara knew she wasn’t supposed to fall for one of her patients but, well, maybe this time letting herself fall wouldn’t be such a bad thing. She tore herself away from Tanner’s side and quietly slipped out of the room. She had a smile on her face for the rest of the day. Sara couldn’t wait to see him again tomorrow and wondered if he wouldn’t be glad to see her again too…

~ To Be Continued ~

[Dawnie]

Wonderful story. Nicely written. Thanks so much for sharing it.

[Sneesee]

That was awesome! I can't wait for more! So, when you have time, post more please! Thank you so much!

[SnowSprite]

Aw! You're a good writer. I'd love it if you'd keep going!

Vulnerability and sneezing. Mmm, yep.

[Love_2_Sneeze_666]

Thanks for the kind words, ladies! Here's part two for anyone still interested.

Hidden Desires Part II

Sara came to work the next morning already grinning with the anticipation of seeing her new favorite patient. She came to a stop in front of the closed door of his room and drew in a breath, putting on her most professional-looking expression before entering. She opened the door, expecting to find Tanner sitting upright as usual, but to her surprise that’s not what she saw at all. Sitting where she was accustomed to seeing that quiet, handsome young man was, well, nothing. The bed was completely empty. Had Tanner gone home already? Sara’s heart skipped a beat when that thought passed through her mind. She raced out of the vacant room and down the hall where she scrambled to find his file. She was far too impatient to look very hard, though. Sara asked the next doctor that passed by if they knew anything about what had happened to him.

“Oh, excuse me, Dr. Townsend. Do you happen to know where the patient staying in room 702 is?” she asked in a single, rushed breath.

“I think he was recently moved to room 449, just down that hall.” Dr. Townsend gestured to his left.

“Thank you!” Sara quickly made her way down the hall before the doctor had a chance to respond. She stopped just outside the room, double-checking the number beside the door. Then she eagerly, impatiently, pushed on the handle and opened the door. Sara let out a huge sigh of relief when she saw Tanner lying down in the bed, sleeping. Or at least, she thought he was sleeping. As Sara stepped closer she saw that his dark eyes were open, staring up at the ceiling. He seemed unaware that Sara was even in the room with him. She cleared her throat to announce her presence and his eyes flicked over towards her. When Tanner recognized her, he turned his entire head to face her and the softest hint of a smile played across his lips, just for a second.

“Hey there. How are you feeling today?” She noticed there was no chair on either side of his bed, so she stood where she was, keeping her eyes locked on Tanner’s. The edges of his nose were noticeably pink, which Sara found adorable. She was rather surprised when he decided to talk to her, rather than remain silent, as was the norm with him. Maybe he’s finally warming up to me, she thought happily.

“Okay,” he responded. Sara couldn’t help but notice the way his voice was deeper with his cold. “My nose wuh…won’t stop ti-tickling though,” he added shakily, obviously trying to fight off a sneeze. He sounded a little congested, and it was all Sara could do to keep her expression as professional as possible while she watched, entranced, as Tanner fought a losing battle with his nose. His nostrils quivered and he squeezed his eyes shut, the black lashes standing out against his pale cheek.

“Uhh….Ushh! Hehshh! Hepshh! Eshhh! Heh..h-h-hshhh! Ushhoo! Epshoo! Ehh…” It seemed time had stopped for that moment. Tanner was frozen in place, nostrils flared, eyes shut, eyebrows raised expectantly. After a moment of waiting, he let out his breath slowly and opened his eyes, glancing back up at Sara. He rubbed a finger underneath his nose vigorously and sniffled a few times.

“Bless you!” Sara exclaimed, still replaying the exquisite fit in her mind. Tanner coughed harshly against his fist and blushed.

“Ugh. Thanks. I didn’t think that would end.” He chuckled and Sara realized he was indeed warming up to her; this was the first time she’d heard him laugh. He had a laugh that made Sara’s heart skip. It was a velvety sound that seemed to come from somewhere deep inside his soul, somewhere that longed to be set free. “Hey, would you mind handing me a tissue?” Tanner gestured to the box sitting on the desk next to him. What with his broken arm, he couldn’t reach it.

“Sure,” Sara replied, leaning over Tanner’s body to grab the box. On her way over, Sara was acutely aware of how close she was to Tanner. She could feel his warm breath against her neck and it sent shivers through her. She straightened herself and handed the box to him, wondering if he had been as aware of their closeness as she was. Tanner blew his nose softly. If he was thinking about their previous closeness, he didn’t show it.

Sara busied herself checking his charts. He’d been given medication for his cold already, and as of 7:15 that morning, the current time being 8:04, Tanner didn’t have a fever. His symptoms had been only sneezing, slight coughing and sore throat, and fatigue. She glanced up from the clipboard in her hands and was startled to see Tanner’s gaze fixed intently upon her. There was something in his eyes that caught her off guard.

“What?” she asked somewhat nervously. Sara didn’t think she could have taken her eyes off his even if she’d wanted too.

“Nothing,” he replied casually, still not taking his eyes off her. Sara wondered if he knew how attracted to him she was. They were both seemingly lost in the unending depths of the other’s eyes, both peering into the other’s soul, when the door burst open and a nurse stepped inside hastily.

“Sara, we need you,” the other woman said breathlessly.

“Why? What is it?”

“It’s room 118, the lady in there is having another attack.” Sara sighed impatiently, annoyed at having been interrupted from her staring contest with Tanner. The woman that the nurse was referring to had been suffered mild head trauma and occasionally had minor panic attacks. It only took a few minutes of reassuring to calm her down, and the attacks were never anything serious, but she’d always favored Sara to be the one to calm her. She wouldn’t let anyone else come near her.

“Can’t someone else look into it? I’m a little preoccupied here,” She gestured towards Tanner, who had settled back against his pillows and closed his eyes. He’d reopened them when he heard Sara mention him.

“I’m sorry, she wants you.”

“Oh alright, I’m coming.” Sara turned to Tanner and flashed him a brief apologetic smile and followed the other nurse out into the hall.

The young man drifted back to sleep shortly after Sara left the room. The added medication for his developing cold had made his body crave sleep, and without Sara there to distract him, he gave in and closed his eyes.

When he next opened them, Tanner found that it was extremely difficult to breathe through his nose. Grabbing several tissues from the nearby box, he gave his nose a few fairly ineffective blows before conceding defeat and tossing them away. The blows had done nothing to allow Tanner to breathe easier, but they hadn’t been completely without response. As soon as the papery material left Tanner’s fingers, his nose began to itch and tickle enormously. He immediately laid his index finger along his upper lip and tried furiously to hold back his oncoming sneezes. His breath hitched once, twice, thrice and…nothing. The tickle retreated to the back of his nose, teasing him. Tanner’s nostrils flared but his eyes somehow managed to stay opened. For the moment, anyway. He thought he’d fought off the worst, but his nose was just getting started. The tickle advanced, catching him off guard. He sneezed freely, openly into the air.

“Eshhuh!” He felt a light mist hit the back of his arm, but he paid no attention. He was too focussed on desperately trying to fight off the fit that would no doubt follow that first sneeze. “Uhh….Hepmmph! Mmph! Hummph!” He’d been able to successfully stifle the first trio into the crook of his naked elbow., but the effort he put into trying to hold them back wore him out and he was unable to stifle any more. Tanner gave up trying to hold back his sneezes, seeing as they would overcome him anyhow. Stifling the first few, however, made Tanner’s nose tickle even more, triggering sneeze after sneeze.

“Huh…Hushh! Heshhoo! Hepshoo! Eshhh!” The sneezes came rapidly, one after another. Tanner was thrown forward with each powerful explosion; they were becoming stronger, wetter, and faster. “Eshhh! Eptshh! Hehshoo! HEISHH!” The sheer force of the final one made tears stream down his cheeks. Once he began to recover, Tanner caught his breath and wipe his face, grateful that his nose seemed to have calmed down for the moment.

“Bless you,” a soft voice murmured, drawing his attention to the hall. In the doorframe stood Sara, quietly staying just outside the room, as if she didn’t trust herself to enter. Tanner’s eyes narrowed slightly, as if through the fog of the medicine he couldn’t recognize her. She took a step closer, allowing herself to be under the bright fluorescent lights of his room, but went no further. Tanner opened his eyes a little more and let his lips curl up into the smallest smile. He loved the way the lights bathed Sara in an angelic wash of white. It flowed over her silky black hair that cascaded over her shoulders and spilled down her back. The lamp left its fingerprint atop her head; an ivory halo, as if to confirm that she was indeed an angel.

Tanner realized that he’d never before thought this way about anyone. Sara must be an angel, for she’d brought a smile to his face when he felt most alone. Sara made him forget the pain of his father’s death and made him feel safe. As his head spun with these thoughts that were so uncharacteristic of his mind, Sara seemed to snap out of her own thoughts. She’d taken several steps closer until she was standing directly beside him.

Before Tanner realized what he was doing, he’d taken Sara’s hand in his own and gently pulled her down to sit on the bed next to him. She didn’t resist and sat down gingerly, being especially careful of his injured leg. Tanner was propped up on the pillows behind his head, his face only a few inches from Sara’s. He felt his heart beat faster. Sara’s heartbeat sped also, keeping pace with Tanner’s. She leaned forward, allowing a breath of air to come between her and Tanner. He reached out with his good arm and, with a surprisingly delicate, gentle touch, he ran his fingers through Sara’s ebony locks, his thumb passing over her soft, supple cheek. This new contact broke Sara’s self-control and she dipped her head down, her lips meeting Tanner’s softly. The kiss seemed to last an hour to Sara, though in reality it was barely a few seconds. She straightened herself and locked her gaze with Tanner’s. They seemed to realize just what had happened at the same moment, and both looked away as one. Sara felt her face flush and she rose off the bed suddenly, not fully knowing she had done so. She turned away from the man who with her relationship was supposed to be entirely professional quickly, her legs deciding to lead her out of the room before her mind approved of it. Before she was able to take a single step, though, Tanner’s soft hand caught her by the wrist and gently held her in place.

“Don’t leave,” he pleaded softly, the kiss still sinking in.

“I have to,” Sara responded, hating the way her voice choked up on the words. She tugged her arm away and Tanner’s fingers slipped off easily, and Sara walked numbly to the door. She glanced back over her shoulder before exiting and titled her head in a gesture of half longing, half apology, and stepped into the hallway, closing the door behind her. Neither of them was sure what had just passed between them, but both had felt something they hadn’t in a long while.

~ To Be Continued, Again ~

[whymilk]

lol great story!!

[Guest linde]

yes, please continue.

I love your story!!!

[brownsville]

oh my god! that is great! i think you have hit a niche market with the vulnerability/sneezing thing!

thats one of the best i've read here!

[a_nonny_mouse]

That's very well-written, especially for its romance-novel-style vein. Would you like to see it archived on my site, next update?

--nonny

[Love_2_Sneeze_666]

That's very well-written, especially for its romance-novel-style vein. Would you like to see it archived on my site, next update?

--nonny

Oh my...nonny, I would be honoured.

Thank you, everyone!

God, my face will be pink all night now!

Part three is coming, just as soon as I have some more time to write.

Again...thank you for all the praise!

[SnowSprite]

Ooo! I'm all warm and fuzzy and giggly now.

[Love_2_Sneeze_666]

Yes, this story has many parts to it. Here's the third one! It's not quite as long as the others, but I'm already working on part four. Anyway, without further ado...

Hidden Desires Part III

Sara opened her sapphire eyes for what felt like the fiftieth time that night. She hadn’t been able to get a minute’s worth of sleep and it was already two fifteen in the morning. She had to be up for work in a few hours. She sat up in bed and looked down at her feet, at the sleeping Starlight who was nestled between them. Sara smiled at the little ball of fur. She carefully got out of bed, careful not to wake the tabby, and decided to fix herself a quick snack. After all, it didn’t look as though she’d be getting any sleep anytime soon. She opened the refrigerator door and stared blankly at its contents, not really seeing what was inside. Sara couldn’t get her mind off what had happened earlier that day. She’d had to pinch herself on more than one occasion to assure herself that the kiss hadn’t been a dream. She still got butterflies just thinking about it. The kiss had been amazing. Sara was instantly flooded back in time to when the kiss took place. Her mind filled with the images of Tanner, before, during, and after his incredible sneezing fit. She was lost in the feeling of Tanner’s soft lips against hers when she stopped herself. Opening her eyes again she thought to herself this isn’t right. He’s my patient. Nothing else can happen between us. That kiss shouldn’t have happened. As much as it pained her to think this way, she knew that she couldn’t risk having developing a relationship with him. If she had gotten caught kissing him, she could kiss her job goodbye. And then what would she do? She had to provide not only for herself, but for her Aunt Grace too. No, she decided, I can’t let whatever is going on between Tanner and I go any further. With that thought, Sara decided she wasn’t hungry anymore and climbed back into bed to try and get some sleep.

Tanner’s eyes were locked to the closed wooden door for the better part of the morning. He anxiously awaited Sara’s arrival. He wasn’t sure exactly what it was he wanted, no, needed, to tell her, but there was definitely something. The words ‘I love you’ passed through his mind several times, but he wasn’t about to admit to himself that he might actually be in love with a woman he’d met only a few days earlier. Tanner told himself it was just the medication talking, though he didn’t quite buy it.

Just as he was attempting to identify his feelings as something other than love, the heavy door opened slowly and his eyes were snapped back to their original position. A tall blond woman entered and smiled superficially at Tanner, and told him she needed to check his blood pressure and she’d need an update on his symptoms.

“What happened to Sara?” he asked this nurse.

“Who? Oh, you mean Nurse Jenson. She’s with another patient at the moment, so I’m filling in for her. Is that alright?” Tanner nodded and allowed this new nurse to go about with her routines. When she finished she flashed him another superficial smile and left, leaving the door open ajar. Tanner assumed that since Sara was busy, she wouldn’t be coming to see him for a while, so he rested his head back down on the pillows and closed his eyes, visualizing the last time they were together. Why had she left like that? Was it something Tanner had done to upset her? He didn’t have much time to think about this, though. His nose started tickling and he quickly grabbed a few tissues out of the box next to him and pressed them to his face.

“Hmmph! Hehmmph! Emmph! Heshh!” Tanner sniffled a few times, trying to see if his nose was finished or not. When no other sneezes came out, he threw the handful of tissues away and went back to thinking about Sara. Or, he would have gone back to thinking about Sara if his nose didn’t ambush him with a barrage of sneezes that he was completely unprepared for. “Eshhuh! Heishh! Ehh…Hepshh!” Tanner’s sensitive nose was still plagued by tickles, but at least the sneezing had finally ended. He glanced back at the door, half hoping to see Sara standing there was she was yesterday. But the sight of only an empty hallway beyond it disappointed him. Sighing, he closed his dark eyes and was once again surrounded by thoughts of Sara. He must have fallen asleep because when he opened his eyes again, Sara was sitting beside him, on a chair she’d evidently brought for that purpose. Her expression was grim and remorseful. She seemed reluctant about something, but Tanner had no idea what. She wasn’t looking at him, but at the stark white tiles on the ground, troubled by whatever thoughts were going through her head. Tanner thought about asking her what was the matter, but a sudden sneeze cut him off before he began.

“Eshhuh!” Sara’s gaze snapped up to him, startled by the noise. Tanner thought he saw her blush, but the color disappeared from her face in an instant and her face went from startled back to grim. Her eyes settled themselves back to the tiled floor.

“Bless you,” she offered in a quiet voice.

“Thanks,” Tanner replied in an even quieter one.

“Tanner, about yesterday,” she began, not sure how to say what needed to be said.

“What about it? Did I do something wrong?” he asked her in a worried tone. Sara’s soft blue eyes met Tanner’s.

“No, Tanner, you didn’t do anything wrong,” she reassured him softly. “I did.”

“What do you mean?” he asked after hesitating a moment. Sara let out her breath in a sigh as if to indicate she really didn’t want to say the words that were about to pass her lips.

“What happened yesterday shouldn’t have happened,” She told him, thinking that this statement would be enough to make him understand. The puzzled look he wore told her she was wrong. “You’re my patient. I’m your nurse. Nothing is supposed to happen between us.” A hurt look came over Tanner’s face and he looked away.

“Oh,”

“Tanner, it’s not that I don’t want,” She hesitated. What did she want from him? A close friendship? More? She didn’t even know herself. She started over. “I’d lose my job, Tanner. If we had gotten caught last night,” She let that sentence finish itself.

“I understand,” He replied dully, not meeting her gaze. Sara started to reach out one hand in an attempt to comfort him, but she stopped herself, placing both hands back in he lap. Tanner looked up.

“If you weren’t my nurse, this wouldn’t be a problem, right?” he asked in a more animated voice, his black eyes sparkling. Sara opened her mouth to reply, but she didn’t know what to say. Was Tanner on to something? She honestly didn’t know.

Someone knocked on the door, grabbing both Sara’s and Tanner’s attention. One of the trainee nurses stuck her head inside the room nervously.

“Excuse me for the interruption, Nurse Jenson, but there’s a phone call for you.”

“Could you please take a message?” Sara asked politely, not wanting to alienate the new employee.

“They say it’s urgent, Nurse Jenson.”

“Alright, I’m coming.” She turned back to Tanner. “I’ll be back.” She told him. She then stood up and followed the trainee to the receptionist’s desk and picked up the phone. “Hello?” she asked rather impatiently.

“Hello, is this Miss Sara Jenson?” The voice on the other end was a formal-sounding male.

“Yes, this is she. Can I help you”

“Miss Jenson, this is St. Heightman’s General Hospital, I’m Doctor Roberts.” Sara recognized the name as the one doctor whom her aunt would allow to treat her.

“Oh, yes, Dr. Roberts. What is it?”

“It’s your aunt.” Sara’s blood instantly turned to ice in her veins. “I’m afraid that the chemotherapy is rapidly becoming more and more ineffective against the cancer.” Sara wasn’t sure if he was about to say more or not, but she cut him off nonetheless.

“Is she alright?” Sara spoke quickly, wasting no time in getting the information she wanted to know.

She’s holding on,” Dr. Roberts said in as positive a voice as the situation would allow. “Sara,” he said, using her name in such a way that both comforted her and frightened her, "“we need you to come down and see your aunt. We’re going to need your consent and opinion for a few things.” He added in a soft yet serious tone.

“Of course, I’ll be right there.” Sara replied immediately. She hung up the phone and asked the receptionist, who had overheard some of her conversation, to find someone to cover the rest of her shift for her. She readily agreed and wished Sara good luck. And, without another thought about Tanner, Sara grabbed her coat and bolted for St. Heightman’s.

~ To Be Continued ~

[Love_2_Sneeze_666]

Once again, this is quite a long peice and the sneeziness doesn't come until the end.

But for those still interested, here is the fourth and final chapter.

Hidden Desires Part IV

Once inside the hospital doors, Sara immediately looked around the unfamiliar environment until she found the receptionist’s desk. She ran over and in a breathless near-whisper told the receptionist, Brenda, that Dr. Roberts had called her here in reference to Grace Jenson. Brenda seemed to know what she was talking about and pointed her down the hall to room 207, where her Aunt was staying and where Dr. Roberts was most likely waiting for her. Sara thanked her and walked briskly down the pastel yellow hallway until she came to the second last door on the left. The door was opened about halfway, allowing Sara to glimpse inside before making her presence known. The room was quite small. Small enough to make it appear cramped and crowded with only a hospital bed and single chair beside a tiny desk occupying it. It was dark and uninviting. The curtains were shut and the room was lit by the minimal glow of a desk lamp. Sara saw that Dr. Roberts sat in the little plastic chair next to her aunt’s bed. She couldn’t see his expression due to the dim lighting, but she could sense that he was uncomfortable and troubled.

After giving herself a moment to collect herself, Sara pushed the door fully open and stepped inside, uttering some sort of polite greeting to Dr. Roberts but seeing only the crumpled heap that was her Aunt Grace lying on the bed. She looked as though the sheets were about to swallow her up, lying there unconscious as she was.

“Thank you for coming,” the doctor was saying to her. Sara met his gaze. Dr. Robert’s face looked monstrously distorted, hidden in shadow.

Sara tried to keep the fear from her voice as she asked the doctor, “How is she?” He looked back at her with a sympathetic expression before settling his eyes on the frail woman in the bed.

“She’s asleep now. Listen, Sara,” The serious tone of his voice was impossible not to fear. Dr. Roberts looked back into Sara’s face and began to say something that was, she guessed, in reference as to why she’d been summoned here, but he only finished his sentence with a hesitant, “what do you say we go somewhere more…well-lit?” You mean somewhere not so depressing, Sara though, but she replied by nodding her head and going out into the hall. Dr. Roberts followed her and shut the door behind him soundlessly. He then led her down the hall and the two made their way to the cafeteria where they could talk in a more light-hearted atmosphere.

“Sara, I want to thank you again for coming down here like this on such short notice.” Dr. Roberts was telling her as they sat in the semi-crowded cafeteria. She thought this was a good a time as any to get right down to what she wanted to know.

“Oh, it’s no trouble at all, Jack.” She used his first name in an attempt to make things a little more comfortable between them and to be sure he was paying attention to what she was saying. Sure enough, at the sound of his own name, Jack Roberts’ eyes looked less professional and he looked more inclined to speak to her as a friend, not as a client. “Can I ask why exactly I was called down here?” she asked him politely yet seriously. His expression became sympathetic and Sara could feel fear clawing at her insides, fighting to get out. But she swallowed hard and held it back, determined not to let it get the best of her. At least, not until she knew all the facts.

“As you know, the chemotherapy we were using to treat your aunt with is failing.” Sara nodded to encourage Jack to continue, “Sara, I’m afraid you’ve got a very difficult decision to make. One option is to perform surgery on Grace and see if we can get rid of all the cancer, but that would be risky because of her age and already frail state. Also, there’s no guarantee that we would be able to get all the cancerous cells.”

“What’s the other option?” Sara asked without hesitation.

“We put her out of her misery,” the doctor stated sadly. Sara sighed, letting out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “You don’t need to make your decision right now,” Jack reassured her, “but we’re going to need your consent on this matter.” Sara nodded; she was too upset to speak. She wanted to go home. She wanted to get away from the smell of medication and cafeteria food. She wanted to be alone with her thoughts. Sara rose up from the plastic bench she was seated on and nodded her thanks to Dr. Roberts, telling him she’d be in contact. Then she turned and headed straight for her parked car.

She got outside and barely noticed the heavy raindrops that splashed on her shoulders. She slumped into the seat of her car and numbly turned on the ignition, pulling out of the parking lot and staring straight ahead, trying to keep her mind on the road. Sara turned on the radio in a feeble attempt to drown out the dark thoughts in her head, but it was no use. She wasn’t able to escape the dreadful pain that flooded her body. She felt fear of losing her aunt, the only family she had left. She felt a crippling sadness that she couldn’t shake off. So she stopped trying.

When Sara arrived at home, she shut herself in her room and, with Starlight snuggled in her lap, she cried for all the pain she felt. She cried for her parents, she cried for her Aunt Grace, she cried for Tanner, and she cried for what she couldn’t even identify. She cried for a few hours until she was too tired to cry anymore. Sara climbed under her blankets, not bothering to change, and fell asleep.

The next day Sara didn’t show up for work. Or the next day. Or the day after that. She stayed at home, occasionally venturing out to visit her Aunt Grace and see how she was doing. Since she was stable currently, Sara didn’t see any point in thinking about the decision Dr. Roberts had told her she needed to make. What Sara really wanted to do was to forget all about it. She had almost succeeded in doing so when another surprise call came from Dr. Roberts. This time, it wasn’t as positive as the last time he’d called her.

“Sara, we need you down here. Now.” He didn’t have to say another word to get Sara there as fast as she possibly could. ‘This is it,’ she thought. ‘She’s dying and he wants me to make the decision’. She was petrified of what was about to come, but forced herself to face it.

“Are you positive that’s your decision?” Dr. Roberts asked her for the fourth time since she’d told him her answer. She looked down at her aunt again. She looked so fragile, so innocent, and so pained. She didn’t deserve this. Sara turned back to Jack and answered him for the fourth time since she’d told him her answer.

“Yes, I’m sure. I want her to come back home with me, where she can go in a place she’s familiar with and surrounded by people who love her.” Maybe ‘surrounded’ wasn’t quite the right word, but Sara would be by her side the entire time.

“Alright, if that’s what you want.”

“It’s what she wants too.” Sara replied, recalling an evening when her Aunt Grace had told her that, if given the choice, she’d want to die here in her home, as peacefully as possible. Sara blinked back tears at the memory and watched as paramedics loaded her aunt’s limp body onto a stretcher and prepared to take her home one last time.

Sara held Aunt Grace’s cold hand as she looked into her eyes, savoring every moment they still had life in them. She forced a sad smile for her aunt and received the smallest one in return. Dr. Roberts was the only one besides her in the room, other than Starlight, who was nuzzling Sara’s ankles and crying. She could sense the grief in the room and was distressed by it. Sara picked her up with one hand to quiet her and fought to keep her own cries in. Aunt Grace was taking tiny, shallow breaths and they were becoming more dispersed and less frequent. Sara kept her aunt’s hand held gently in her own until, eventually, the older woman’s eyes closed and the last breath escaped her cracked lips.

“She’s gone,” Sara whispered to Jack. He nodded and placed a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her.

“You did the right thing.” Sara knew in her heart that was true, but it didn’t in any way ease the pain she felt.

A couple days after her aunt passed away, Sara was writing in her diary and decided to go through some old entries. She came across the one mentioning her visit with Tanner and suddenly realized that she hadn’t been to the hospital to see him in nearly a week! She’d been too preoccupied with her aunt that she’d completely forgotten about him. Although it wasn’t exactly the first thing she wanted to do, Sara put on her coat and got ready to brave the world; she owed Tanner an explanation for why she never came back to visit him, at least.

Sara received a few words of condolence, some hugs, and many sympathetic smiles from her coworkers once inside the building. One of the other nurses asked her why she’d come back so early.

“I have some unfinished business with a patient I have to see to.” She’d replied while keeping her eyes locked on the hall that would lead her back to Tanner. She paced herself as she walked down the hallway, giving herself time to think about what she would say to him. She came to the closed door and pushed it open, feeling the familiar butterflies again at just seeing him again.

“Tanner, I –” Sara halted in her steps, mouth opened, eyes wide and unbelieving. In Tanner’s place on the bed was an older man of about fifty or so, reading a newspaper and obviously startled by the sudden disturbance. Sara blushed furiously and apologized. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I must have the wrong room. Please excuse me.” She closed the door again and looked up at the number of the room. 449, yes this was the one. ‘Don’t tell me he’s been moved again!’ Sara thought as she marched down to speak with the receptionist.

“Room 449? Yes, he went home earlier today. You just missed him by a few hours, actually.” The receptionist smiled at Sara, who must have looked downright distraught over this news, because the young woman behind the counter asked her, “Is there something the matter, Nurse Jenson? You don’t look well.”

“I’m fine. Thanks,” Sara responded much colder than she’d meant to. “I’m sorry, it’s just,”

“No need to apologize. I understand.” Sara smiled the first genuine smile in a few days, and left the hospital. She got in her car but didn’t start it. Instead, she simply sat there, gripping the wheel as if it were the only thing keeping her from drowning in misery. Sara couldn’t believe she’d lost her chance with him. She understood it now; she loved Tanner. Even though they’d met about two weeks ago, she honestly felt a love for him that was deeper than anything she’d ever felt for a man before. Sara let a few salty tears slip down he cheeks and began to drive back to her house. Home had never seemed like an emptier place than it did to her then.

Sara was so lost in despair that she couldn’t bring herself to lift her eyes to the place she called home. Only when she started walking up the front steps did she realize there was someone standing at the top of them, staring at her. She couldn’t get a good look at him, but it looked almost like he had three legs.

“Sara!” The three-legged person called her name. That voice was so familiar for some reason. As Sara approached the person waiting on the steps for her, she caught a glimpse of his face. Tanner! She stopped, shocked. Tanner was standing on her front steps with a pair of crutches, calling her name. “Sara!” he called out to her again, making her cross the final few steps and standing in front of him. Tanner’s face was a mixture of relief, confusion, and determination. She couldn’t help but notice that Tanner wasn’t over his cold yet, either. His nose and cheeks were a matching shade of pink and he held several crumpled tissues in his hand. His voice was raw and deep, but she couldn’t determine whether that was from his illness or from emotion, or both. She guessed it was probably the latter. “Sara, don’t leave this time. You can’t avoid me forever, now tell me what’s going on! Why didn’t you come back?” Sara shook her head madly, trying to get a word in.

“Stop, Tanner. I wasn’t avoiding you. I’m so sorry I didn’t come back to see you again but…” She stopped talking and looked away.

“What?” His voice was no longer demanding, but softer, more compassionate. “Tell me, Sara. Please.” Sara let out a shaky breath and looked back at Tanner.

“My aunt was dying. She passed away a few days ago. That’s why I didn’t come back.” Tears welled up in her eyes as she spoke the words; Sara still couldn’t talk about it without getting choked up. It was still too soon. Tanner instantly regretted yelling at her.

“Oh, Sara. I’m sorry,” he said softly. “Come here.” He laid his crutches against the brick wall and balanced on one leg, holding his arms out and welcoming her into them. Sara eased herself into his embrace, resting her cheek against his chest and letting him lean against her for support. She cried softly against him, embarrassed to be doing so, but Tanner didn’t seem to mind at all. He just held her tightly, gently stroking her back and her hair with one hand, and wrapping the other arm around her waist. Tanner placed his head on Sara’s shoulder but regretted it instantly. His rosy nose, already so sensitive from his cold, was tickled by her inky hair. Tanner couldn’t pull away from her because he had nothing else to support himself, so he stayed where he was and tried desperately to hold back the sneeze. He scrunched up his face and flared his nostrils, but that only seemed to aggravate the tickle more, making the urge to sneeze become something he just couldn’t overcome. He was forced to sneeze onto Sara’s shoulder, surprising them both with the force of it.

“Uhh…ESHH!” Sara was jolted out of her sadness by Tanner’s sudden sneeze against her. She could feel his entire body tremble against hers as he gripped her waist, desperately trying not to topple over. Tanner sniffled and blushed.

“Excuse me, I couldn’t keep that one back,” he apologized, having no idea what that sneeze was doing to Sara. She leaned back just enough to look at Tanner.

“Bless you.” She said quietly. Tanner turned his head to cough a few times into his fist and looked back at Sara with an embarrassed smile on hi lips. Sara could feel him shivering beneath her touch and became concerned and sympathetic, her nurturing quality kicking in. “Come on, let’s get you inside. You must be frozen.” She handed him his crutches and gently guided him inside, listening intently for another sneeze. She wasn’t disappointed. Not long after she had Tanner seated in a comfy chair with a blanket around his shoulders and a mug of hot tea in his hands than he began to feel another fit coming on. He handed Sara his mug, announcing the oncoming sneezes in little gasps.

“Saraahh….I, I think I’m g-going tooohh….snehh…sneeze.. USHHUH! Heishhh! Epshhh!” He sniffled, grateful for a quick breath between the rapid-fire sneezes. Knowing there was more to come, he could do nothing but tilt his head back and wait for the tickle to gain enough momentum. Sara watched Tanner’s every move, not missing a single detail of his entrancing fit. He looked so helpless, stuck in that position. Sara couldn’t take it anymore. She knelt in front of Tanner and brought up a few strands of her hair to tickle his nose and release him from the torturous tickles. She brushed the fine strands across Tanner’s nostrils delicately, making them quiver. She didn’t have to do much coaxing; Tanner was already on the verge of that first sneeze. She gave her hair one last flick across his nostrils and that was it. Tanner completely lost control to the wet, body-bending, thundering sneezes that overpowered him.

“EHSHH! ESHH! SHHH! USHHUH! HUPSHH! ESHHOOO! HESHHOO! Uhh…..UHH….HUHSHHOO!!” Tanner sniffled several times and felt the soft material of a tissue pressed against his nose. His eyes still closed tight, tears leaking out, he heard Sara’s soft whisper in his ear.

“Blow.” She commanded. Tanner obeyed gratefully, blowing heartily. He opened his eyes when he’d finished and saw Sara looking up at him with a strange smile on her face.

“What?” The look on her face made him almost afraid he’d repulsed her by his sneezing, but she just smiled at him and looked away.

“Nothing,” she told him, getting up off the floor and sitting back on the chair beside his. “How are you feeling?” Tanner cleared his throat.

“Much better now.” He looked at her and smiled. “Sara, I have something to tell you.” His eyes gazed at he intently, his tone implying what he was about to say was the most serious thing he’d say in his life. For some reason this didn’t frighten Sara or make her nervous. She was having some pretty serious thoughts about Tanner too.

“Yes?” She encouraged him to continue.

“I know that we just met, what, two weeks ago? And that this will probably sound insane, but,” He took her hand tenderly in his. “Sara, I think I’m falling in love with you.” Sara stopped breathing. Had he just said what she thought he said? It was impossible. She had to be sure, though.

“What did you say?”

“I said I’m falling in love with you. I understand if you think I’m crazy or something,” He trailed off and looked away. Sara reached over and took his other hand in hers.

“Tanner, I love you too.” She stated, grinning like mad. Tanner jerked his head up. There was something in his eyes Sara couldn’t put her finger on. Then it hit her. It was relief. Gratefulness. Happiness. It was everything she was feeling at that moment too. Sara’s eyes began to fill up with tears as she choked out, “I’ve never felt this before.” She didn’t know exactly why she’d said it, but it felt good to say it just the same.

“Me neither,” She heard Tanner’s own choked up, sincere response. She took one of her hands and wiped her eyes to get a better look at him and saw that his eyes were just as teary as hers. She couldn’t resist anymore. Sara got up out of her chair and put her hands on either side of Tanner’s neck and kissed him. The tears still flowed down both their cheeks, but neither cared. They were in love and they were together. And, most importantly, both knew that they would never have to face the world alone again.

~ End ~

[Dawnie]

Just wonderful. So romantic all of them where. I love the vunerability thing going on. Yes, I have Florence Nightengale Syndrom at times. It was just wonderful. Especially the last story when Sara is actually tickling Tanner's nose with her hair. I just loved it! Thank you so much for sharing all of these and kudos on being such a great writer.

[bless]

ohh its a long, long time ago I last read this, but it is still wonderfull. thanks for writing it!