The Trouble With Ewoks (Secret Santa: for 27jaredjensen) - (5 Parts)

[MusicaDiabolos]

NOTE: I know this is a couple days early but I am posting in multiple parts as I finish them, hopefully I will be done the story by the 18th as I leave the next day! Thanks guys, hope you enjoy it

So this is my first time posting a full-length story here...but what better way than as a Secret Santa present for the lovely 27jaredjensen? Here is your third prompt. This is Supernatural, set Season 1 (soon after Dead in the Water, before Bloody Mary), so mainly spoilers for the pilot. I tried to be both funny and angsty, no idea if it actually worked...

Disclaimer: It all belongs to Eric Kripke. Also, I don’t own Star Wars. And, um, sorry for my Latin later on, I had to make stuff up here...

Prompt: 3. Supernatural: On a hunt, Sam starts sneezing his face off and they can’t seem to figure out why. Dean thinks he’s getting sick so he tries to take care of him and makes him take Dayquil and buys Kleenex and stuff. And Sam can be all grumpy and annoyed by it maybe. In the end it turns out that Sam is allergic to the fugly that they’re hunting.

PART I

The fire was everywhere, surrounding them both, bursting from her hands, outstretched toward him, charring the golden halo of her hair...her mouth opened in a silent scream...

“Sam.”

“Gah!” He burst into wakefulness; Dean ducked a giant flying fist with ease. “Sorry.” Sam cleared his throat. “I’m awake.”

“Yeah, I see that.” His brother was eyeing him with concern, an expression so common in the last few months that Sam had told him his face would freeze that way. “Dream?”

He didn’t answer, pretending to be interested in the road map in the glove compartment..

“Look, Sam, I know you don’t like me asking and I don’t like me asking, but have you got any sleep at all in the past week?”

“Some.” He mumbled. “So, where are we at? Still in Florida?”

“Gainesville. Got a call from one of Dad’s old buddies, looking for him but of course he isn’t picking up - ”

“Of course,” Sam muttered. Dean gave him a warning look.

“So I said we’d take a look. Some little kids getting mauled by coyotes by the looks of it - ”

“But naturally, coyotes aren’t indigenous to the area,” Sam finished for him. “Got it.”

“That, and some weird eyewitness accounts. Police are saying the parents are just traumatized, but...yeah.” Dean pulled into a parking lot outside Joe’s Diner. “Let’s grab a bite and then we’ll go chat up a few of the mommies and daddies.”

“Dean, their kids were just attacked, they’re not going to want to talk to us...”

His brother grinned impishly and tossed him a Wildlife Service ID.

“Just doin’ our duty, Sammy. Come on, let’s get some grub into that oversized beanpole you call a body.”

Sam sighed and stepped out of the Impala into the sunlight. The Florida breeze was strong for this time of year; he rubbed at his eyes, trying to dispel a sudden itchiness.

“Rise and shine!” Dean was already at the swinging door.

It was a typical greasy spoon kind of place, and Sam eyed the oily-looking formica tabletops with distaste as he sat down in a booth opposite Dean, who was grinning at the stereotypical forty-something waitress with a heavy coat of red lipstick. As she wandered over dispassionately to greet them, the tingle moved from the corner of Sam’s eyes into his sinuses. He rubbed at his nose vigorously, wondering why they all had to wear such strong perfume.

“What can I get for ya, sweetpea?” She said monotonously.

“Coffee black, short stack and a side of bacon, sugar.” Dean smiled winningly.

“How about you?” She paused. “You okay honey?”

Sam nodded, pinching his nose to fight off the impending sneeze. The tickle seemed to abate. “Um, just coffee for me pl – hih – plea – hih-hih-Heh-ktsssch!” He lost the battle, cupping his hands over his nose and mouth.

“Gesundheit,” said Dean, raising his eyebrows.

“Bless you, honey. I’ll be right back with your coffee.” The waitress wandered away again. Sam sniffled.

“You feeling okay, Sammy?”

“Yeah, Dean, it’s just a – just a sne – Heh-kishooo!” He almost banged his head in the table from the momentum. “Ugh, sorry. So, tell me about our monster of the week.”

Dean’s eyebrows had raised even higher, but now they sank back into a furrow. “Right. Well, basically we’re looking for some kind of little furry monster. There’s gotta be a pack or something, because the attacks have been happening pretty much at the same time, all over town.”

“We can’t narrow it down a little?” Sam frowned, brushing his index finger along the underside of his itching nose.

“Not until we talk to the witnesses.” Dean smiled up at the waitress, who had the coffee and food all ready. “Wow, Cheryl, that was fast.”

“Grill’s always on, sweetheart.” She stalked away grumpily to help the next customers. Dean poured the syrup liberally onto his pancakes and took an enormous bite of bacon. Sam felt faintly nauseous watching him.

“Dean, you’re going to rot your teeth.”

“Not today I’m not. Drink your coffee, it’s good for you.” He looked up when Sam didn’t answer. “What’s wrong?”

Sam’s face was screwed up against another sneeze, his breath already hitching desperately.

“Hih-hih-hih-” He paused. “Huh. Ugh, God. Coffee tastes like drain cleaner, Dean.”

“Don’t order stuff if you’re not gonna drink it,” his brother replied cheerfully. “Hey, you coming down with something?”

“What? No. No, I think it’s her perfume or something.” He sniffled audibly, and Dean’s eyebrows looked in danger of disappearing into his hairline again. “I’m fine, seriously, I – Heh-tsscchff!” He caught the sudden sneeze in his elbow. “Ugh, can we please just go, Dean? I was fine in the car, and it’s almost night fall. We need to figure out what we’re dealing with.”

His brother gazed longingly at his half-eaten breakfast-supper, then sighed fishing some cash out of his pocket. “Fine. You don’t have to give me the puppy dog eyes, you’re freakin’ twenty-two now, man.”

Sam grinned as he sauntered out behind Dean, sniffling all the while.

Fixed the spoilers and the spacing. ~ obsessed

[scarlett_ohara2]

Ahhhh Season 1 boys!!! I LOVE how this has started out! (A great balance between funny and angsty, by the way )

Can't wait to read more!

[ooo]

Aww, S1 boys! Sam trying not to sneeze in the middle of his sentence is SO hot. I love the start of this - can't wait to read more of it!

(PS, I LOVED that prompt. I'm so glad you're writing it! And, PPS - I forgot to say, but if it bothers you that the prompt kind of says where your story's going to go, it's totally fine to spoiler it or have it in the last post instead Just as long as it's somewhere I can find it when I go looking. I don't know whether you can edit your posts but if you like maybe one of the staff can help?)

[MusicaDiabolos]

Thanks, that would be great! I have no idea how to do the editing stuff, is there some way to do the spoiler thing where you have to highlight the prompt in order to see it?

[ooo]

Yep! You just type [spoiler ] and [/spoiler ] without the spaces and it comes out

like this

. Hope that helps! (If you can't edit your own post, you could PM someone from staff who's online and see if they can do it for you )

[obsessed]

Oooh, very cute.

And I've added in the spoiler notice.

Lemme know if anything else should be changed.

[iluvsneezes]

Aww, this is so adorable! I love season one Winchesters, and can't wait for more.

[MusicaDiabolos]

Here is Part 2! I don't know how many parts there will be, like I said, I'm kind of going with the flow Thanks so much for your comments, you're very encouraging for my writing marathon!

Is there a way to make this double spaced? It's easier to read. Thanks, oh kind staff!

Their first three eyewitnesses were practically useless, teary and protective young mothers who insisted that large, rabid wolves had attacked their babies (or in one case, the neighbour’s bichon shitzu). All the while, Sam could feel the growing irritation and congestion in his sinuses, which he was having difficulty concealing from Dean. He sensed the sidelong glances every few minutes, whenever he sniffed or cleared his throat or rubbed at his eyes.

“I’m sorry – can you repeat that sir?” Sam blinked furiously and fixed an expression of polite incredulity on his face, while Dean just stared wide-eyed at the father of a set of twin girls who had been attacked a week before in their own backyard.

“I told you.” The man said crossly. “My daughters were attacked by a gang of Ewoks.”

“The – uh – the creatures from the Return of the Jedi?” Sam spluttered, flabbergasted.

“That’s right.” The witness glared at the floor. “Always hated those freaking things.”

“Yeah, well, so did I,” Dean said humorously, “but that doesn’t – ow!” Sam elbowed him.

“Dean, stop it,” he muttered. “We’re supposed to help him, not mock him.”

His brother narrowed his eyes at him. “Turn your head the other way for a second.”

Sam obeyed. “What? Why – ah-ah-TSCCChhh!” He cleared his throat. “Excuse me.”

“Thank you for your time, sir,” Dean said formally, as he stood up and pulled Sam to his feet by the sleeve. “We will do our best to take care of your little coyote problem.”

“I’m telling you, man,” the father shook his head despairingly, “they were Ewoks!”

“We’ll be in touch!” Dean called, already halfway to the door.

“Dean, what are you doing? We could have got a more detailed description! At least he wasn’t crying all over us!”

“Seriously, Sam, Ewoks? And anyway,” Dean stalked towards the Impala, “I didn’t want you getting your geeky germs all over him.”

“Dean, I’m not sick,” Sam said grumpily, getting into the passenger side and rubbing his still-itchy nose vigorously with one hand.

“Really.”

“Yeah.”

“You’re not sick.”

“Yes – hih-hih-ETSCheww! Et-schkk!”

“You always do this man! You pretend you’re not sick, all that macho crap, then the next thing you know we’ve infected the whole town and spent a week lying around a motel room while the evil runs around unchecked.”

Sam sniffed. “Whatever. I’m not sick, just tired. And itchy.”

“Right.” Dean pulled over to talk to a man at the bus stop. “Excuse me, sir, can you direct me to the nearest Walgreens?”

After Dean had bought have the cold supplies at the drug store and dumped them unceremoniously into Sam’s lap, they decided to find a motel room to settle down for the night and do some research. As soon as he stepped through the doorway, however, Sam’s symptoms seemed to increase tenfold.

“Hih- HutshCHOO! Etchugh, Heh-hetchsh!” He rummaged in his Walgreen’s bag for a tissue. “God, what is it about this town?”

Dean hustled him toward the bed.

“Come on, Sam, lie down. Take some Nyquil, we’ve got plenty.”

“I’b nod taking the drowsy stuff, Deand.” Sam sniffled and blew his nose pathetically. “You know that. And I’m not sick.”

“Yeah, whatever, we’ve got plenty of Dayquil too.” He shoved Sam lightly backward. “Come on, Sam, lie down and take your medicine, we’ve got lots of work to do.”

“Stop babying me,” Sam muttered. “Ishoo – hih – iSCHfff!”

“Well, you know what Sam, it’s not my fault you’re running yourself into the ground.” He shoved a six hour dose into his little brother’s hands. “You think I haven’t noticed? You never sleep, you’re up all the time on that stupid laptop, you’re drinking Starbucks like it’s going out of business and then you don’t even eat anything. It’s not healthy, man, so I guess I gotta take care of you like you’re freakin’ six years old.”

Slightly cowed, Sam shifted on the bed and brought the small cup of cold medicine to his lips; unfortunately his nose had other plans, his breath already hitching urgently.

“Hih – hih – Oh God – hih – ahKISHOOO! Eh-ketsch!” He caught the second one in his elbow, then looked up sheepishly at his brother, realizing his lap and hands were now splattered with sticky red liquid.

“Damn,” said Dean, fighting back a snicker, “you never can do things halfway, can you, Sammy?”

The younger man sighed. “Now I’m all sticky.”

Dean snorted. “And now I know for sure you’re back to bein’ six years old.” He grabbed the cup and poured a new dose as Sam went to rinse his hands off. “Better change those pants too!”

As Sam finally got settled down and medicated on the bed, Dean pulled out their Dad’s journal and started flipping pages. The sound was faintly soothing, and Sam felt his eyelids drooping before his sinuses retaliated violently to his change in posture.

“ECCCSSH-uh! Ugh.”

He sat up again, rubbing his watering eyes vigorously. “Can I jusd stob sdneezing all the damn time?”

“Give it time, the medecine’ll work,” said Dean distractedly. “Hey, look what I found – Dad saw some Ewoks once too!”

“Seriously?” Sam abandoned his itchy eyes as a lost cause and looked up, still sniffling to fight off the next sneeze.

“Yeah, well, not actual Ewoks, but it fits the description. Furry, midget-sized, pack animals, attacking children in rural areas at night...some guy named them too...tantillus pilosus esuritio...”

“Small hairy hunger?” Sam translated quickly. “Well, that’s...”

“Fitting. Disturbing.”

“A little.” Sam sniffled. “God, I really have to sneeze again...hih-hih...” He waited, his breath hitching, then sighed. “Ugh, it’s stugck.” He dragged a knuckle under his nose.

“Man, I thought that stuff was supposed to be super fast acting?” Dean frowned, reaching out and placing a hand on his brother’s forehead. “Well, you’re not hot, so it’s not the flu. Maybe you can try to sleep it off?”

“Don’t wanna sleep. I don’t need to sleep.” Sam pushed his brother’s hand away. “I’m gonna take a shower.”

“Okay, but after that, just take a nap? Please?” Dean looked so concerned that Sam swallowed his biting retaliation. Then his brother grinned. “Maybe with a few hours sleep you can stop being a pathetic little bitch.”

Sam glared, sniffled, and muttered “Jerk” on his way to the bathroom. Dean chuckled.

Next part up tomorrow definitely, hopefully the others as well over the next two days!

Spacing fixed. ~ obsessed

[27jj]

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I am unbelievably happy and excited and !!!!!!! right now!! I made sounds. Before I even read the story. Before I even clicked on the link to read the story. Squeaking sounds.

I. Love. It. I love that it’s in season 1, and poor Sammy with his nightmares and then sneezing! LOVE the sneezing in the middle of his sentences sooooooooooo much. And then sneezing again when he’s trying to tell Dean it was just a sneeze. And then more sneezing at the end when he gets a frustrated and is like, let’s just get out of here. And I love the title!! And I love you. And I love sneezy Sam.

MULTIPLE PARTS? It feels like the last three birthdays plus Christmas plus the fourth of July all wrapped up in one great awesome holiday where there is sneezy Sam:)

So, can I just say that we should do this whole Secret Santa thing forever and always every year?

THANK YOU MusicaDiabolos so incredibly much for this incredibly awesome story!! You rock

OMG AS SOON AS I POSTED THIS, THERE WAS ANOTHER PART!! This is the best day EVER.

[obsessed]

UUU. I love how much he's sneezing, and Sammy. Plus, the fact that Dean's so insistent and he completely refuses is just so - worthy.

As to double spacing, you have to do that by hand, sorry!

[27jj]

Mmm, so much sneeziness and HOTNESS:) I am loving this story!!

(or in one case, the neighbour’s bichon shitzu)

*gigglesnort* Also, Ewoks! I mean, obviously, from the title, but, yeah.

His brother narrowed his eyes at him. “Turn your head the other way for a second.”

Sam obeyed. “What? Why – ah-ah-TSCCChhh!” He cleared his throat. “Excuse me.”

Heee:) Dean knew he was gonna sneeze:) And I love Dean getting all upset and telling Sam it will be like all the other times when he infects the whole town:) Ooh and I love the “Oh God” when he’s going to sneeze…OMG and when Sam sneezes and spills the medicine all over himself!!

You have turned me into a melting puddle of happy goo. *goes to re-read a million more times*

OH I also forgot to say that I really really liked the stuck sneeze a LOT and the way Sam is getting all congested and how insistent Dean in getting Sam medicine and then making him take it and the forehead feel! YAY.

[shygreeneyes]

Ah, this is going to be a fantastically fun ride!

[BlueRandom]

His brother narrowed his eyes at him. “Turn your head the other way for a second.”

Sam obeyed. “What? Why – ah-ah-TSCCChhh!” He cleared his throat. “Excuse me.”

Heee:) Dean knew he was gonna sneeze:)

I loved that bit too!

This was so awesome!! It's very Season One-y and really in character ... made me happy.

[Lady Blessington]

Whoa, this feels so much like Season One. Well done! *salutes*

I love Sam with his build-ups. Aghgh.

[*lovely_lily*]

AWW! This is freakin fantastic

Season 1 was my favorite season and Sam with his sneezyness, awwww

LOVE IT, ahaaha.

[crazy_cat_girl]

Aww! This is great! I love your concerned Dean. :-D And your sneeze spellings are great!

[iluvsneezes]

This is SO awesome! I love sneezy!Sammy more than anything. I love that Dean is trying desperately to take care of Sam, Sam's stuck sneeze, and when he spilled cough syrup all over himself. *DIES*

[MusicaDiabolos]

Double-spacing by hand kind of sucks. Sorry, got bored fast.

Here is part 3! There are two more in the works, with luck to be posted tomorrow Thanks so much for all your feedback, sorry I don't have time to respond individually but you guys are making me feel like a million dollars during a stressful time Enjoy!

By the time he got out of the shower Sam’s sneezes felt like no more than a distant memory. Dean had left a note (“Off for some evening recon. GET SOME SLEEP.”) on

the bedside table, but he had gone no more than a few steps towards it to pick it up when a fit overwhelmed him once more.

“Hih-hih-ECCHHUgh, heh-KETSCh, ishoo, ishoo...God...hihh-ATSCHEWW!”

He swore and stumbled back into the bathroom; his head felt stuffed with cotton wool, and his eyes were burning. He glanced in the mirror; his eyes were red-rimmed

and swollen. This was no cold.

“Damn it. Estchew!”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Dean crouched silently in the juniper bush outside Mr. Ewok-Hater’s house, watching his two little girls play on their swing set (their backyard now surrounded by a barbed wire fence.) He felt a little creepy doing it, but the girls had escaped their last attack practically unscathed by the simple expedient of climbing an apple tree; there was a major chance the tactile estuary things would be back for more.

Their father glared through the window at them every few minutes, a silent challenge to the creatures of his nightmares.

What was that – a rustling? Dean froze, barely breathing, straining to hear anything at all supernatural. There it was! A rustling, a chattering slightly lower-pitched than a squirrel, coming from his far right. He slipped his bow knife out of his pocket in one smooth motion...

And spun around just in time to see three of the things leaping out of the bush behind him with identical, terrible squeals.

“Holy sh -”

It was all he had time for. The things (about the size of garden gnomes, brown and furry with beady eyes and long black claws) pounced on him on all sides; one fastened onto his knife hand and began chewing with small sharp teeth, while the others scratched at his leather coat and jeans. Apparently the heavy claws weren’t sharp enough to pierce denim and leather; he shook them off with a yell, and distantly he heard the girls screaming and the porch door slamming behind them.

The one on his hand had achieved its task, swiping his big knife while the others lay brefly dazed on the ground.

“Why you little - ”

He dove in his pocket, coming up with his trusty lighter; he had left the guns in the Impala, not wanting to cause a major disturbance. He flicked it on and feinted at the one with his knife; it squealed and leapt away, then began to run away much faster than any rodent.

Still carrying his knife. Dean cursed and got to his feet to run after it, only to fall flat on his face with a yelp of surprise; the other two creatures, whom he had assumed unconscious, had prevented his pursuit by carefully tying his shoelaces together. They scampered off after their fellow with squeaks and squeals, a kind of mocking laughter.

Dean cursed again.

“What do I look like, a friggin’ Storm Trooper?” he called after them. He glanced down at himself, muttering angrily. The things shed like crazy, his clothes were covered in fine brown hairs.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

When Dean got back to the room, Sam was sitting up, frowning and tapping away at his laptop.

“Hey,” he said, and sniffed loudly as a kind of dismal greeting.

“Thought I told you to get some sleep?”

“’M not sick.” His breath hitched twice, and he turned to stifle into his elbow. “Heh-hetsch!”

“Sam, for -”

“I’b nod sigck,” Sam continued doggedly, “because I’m having allergies.” He cleared his throat and sniffled. “Dean, my throat isn’t sore, I don’t have any aches or chills or anything, but my eyes are burning and there’s – hih-hih – th – hih-ETSSSCCGH! Ugh. That.” Sam finished lamely, reaching beside him for a fresh tissue.

“So..what, you’re allergic to something? You never have been before. I would know.”

“Apparently it can develop at any point,” Sam said, scrubbing at his itching nose vigorously with his left hand and tapping away at the keyboard with his right. “That’s why I’m looking up the pollen counts for Gainesville, figured it was hayfever, something in the air – Heschewww! Ugh, God.”

“Anything?”

“Nope, all low.” Sam sighed gloomily and yawned widely. “Tried taking a shower, too, didn’t work for long.”

“Aw, man, I’m sorry. Guess Dayquil’s not the thing for you right now, huh?” Dean said sympathetically.

“No.” Sam looked up. “I think I’m going to need antihistamines or som – holy crap, Dean, what the hell happened to you?!”

Dean blinked. “What? Just some normal, everyday bruises. Perks of the job.”

“Dude, your hand is bleeding.”

He glanced downward. “Oh, um, right. Uh, barbed wire fence.” Sam raised his eyebrows. “And, uh, maybe some of the tantry pillow things might have sort of got the jump on me in the bushes.”

“Seriously?”

“Sam, don’t you dare say it -”

“You got your ass kicked by Ewoks, Dean?”

“Yeah, well.” Dean grumbled. “They were smart little buggers. They -” He paused, then trailed off. Sam already looked to be working on another sneeze. “You don’t need to know the details. Bless.”

“Hih-hih-ketSCHH! Ugh, thanks. Here, let me take a look.” Sam motioned him to come over, pulling out the first aid kit from under his bed. “It might need stitches, looks deep.”

Dean sat down opposite him, just as Sam stifled two more sneezes into his elbow.

“Gross, dude. D’you think it’s getting worse?”

“I dunno, I just feel like crap,” Sam grumbled. “Lemme see.”

Dean extended his bloody hand, complete with a row of puncture marks.

Sam sniffed again. “Not too bad, we should disinfect it, though.” He pulled out a bottle antiseptic and was about to just pour when Dean stayed his hand.

“Dude! Gently.”

His younger brother scowled. “Do you want it to get infected?”

“No.” Dean muttered mutinously. “Ma’am.”

“Then you have to – hih – let me – hih-hih-ketSCHEWW!”

Dean yanked his hand back. Sam looked at him sheepishly from under his bangs, askew over his face from the force of the sneeze.

“Well, if it wasn’t infected before...”

“Shuddup.”

Double spaced for you. ~ obsessed

[shygreeneyes]

"Well, if it wasn't infected before..."

ROFLMAO!

Poor Sam! I love this allergic to the monster plot bunny, though!

[obsessed]

Awww, poor thing. Feeling like crap.

[27jj]

Haha, Dean got attacked by Ewoks!! And covered in hair…

I love that Sam is like, researching allergies. That is such a Sam thing to do. And sooo much sneezy hotness. Have I mentioned how awesome you are?????

“Then you have to – hih – let me – hih-hih-ketSCHEWW!”

Dean yanked his hand back. Sam looked at him sheepishly from under his bangs, askew over his face from the force of the sneeze.

“Well, if it wasn’t infected before...”

“Shuddup.”

That is the BEST.

[MusicaDiabolos]

Thanks so much guys! Parts 4 and 5 will hopefully be up tomorrow, I'm finalizing them in my brain as we speak

[MusicaDiabolos]

Part 4 is up! I am quite wicked to poor Sam in this one, I believe But we all know it's cuz I love him! Thanks for all the replies, again! I'm on the home stretch, final part should be up tonight before I leave for my lovely Hawaiian vacation

While Sam turned his attention to researching the nesting habits and killing procedures of the tanti-whatsit ratios, Dean decided to take his turn in the shower. He chose not to mention it to Sam, but he was feeling somewhat pummelled by the night’s events.

By the time he was clean and dressed, Sam had actually fallen asleep, basically keeled over backwards on the bed with the computer at his side. Smiling fondly, Dean shut it down and unfolded Sam’s legs so he was fully supine. He didn’t want to disturb his rarely-slumbering brother, so rather than pulling out the covers out from under him Dean gently placed his own leather jacket overtop of Sam’s torso. His brother’s breaths were heavy and congested; he ruffled the shaggy brown hair fondly, then climbed onto his own bed for some well-deserved rest. They had at last agreed that it would be best to take out the nest when the small creatures were sleeping and unawares, during the day. Maybe Sam would be feeling better as well, or they could at least go to Walgreen’s again for some more drugs...

“Freakin’ Ewoks.” Dean murmured dispassionately.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jess was screaming again, but the fire was too loud...and now he couldn’t move, he could only watch her as she screamed and no one heard her, no one would ever hear her...the fire everywhere, burning him now...he was on fire, he was on...

“Sam?”

The fire was eating him, his throat and chest and arms...

“Sam, wake up!”

Sam’s eyes snapped open, to see his brother’s face looming over his own. He shoved himself back into the headboard with an audible *bam,* then immediately dissolved into a sneezing fit.

“Et-SCHUUgh, kitscccchff, kitscchff – ugh, God – heh-HETSCH!” He pushed his brother’s leather coat off his torso, curling back in on himself and buring his face in the pillow with a groan. He was so uncomfortably congested it was getting hard to breathe. And now the top of his head hurt, too.

“Holy crap, Sam, what happened?”

Dean was staring at his torso, so he looked down. Everything – his throat, his arms, the visible part of his chest – was covered in red blotches and raised welts. He touched his arm gingerly; it burned and itched like crazy. He sat up straight, a question on his lips; then Sam’s eyes fell on the leather jacket that had just been covering his torso and arms.

His brother snatched it up and clutched it to his chest protectively.

“No, man. You are NOT allergic to my coat. You’ve been around it your entire life...” Dean wrinkled his nose and brushed some more gnome hairs off of it. “Man, I’m going to have to have this steam cleaned or something from those stupid things climbing all over me...”

“Hih-hih-Huh-TSCHOO!”

Dean locked eyes with Sam, whose hands covered his nose and mouth, in sudden understanding.

“You don’t think -”

Sam groaned, the sound muffled by his cupped hands. “Goddambid.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“I guess we should have, um, guessed, huh, Sam?” said Dean loudly over the sound of the shower. “You know, new fugly and everything. Not to mention those estu-ratios have a mean streak a mile wide, for a pack of teddy beat things.”

“I don’t think that would have anything to do with an anaphylactic reaction.” Sam’s hoarse voice echoed strangely in the tiled bathroom.

“No, maybe not.” Dean paused. “You trying to drown yourself in there? It’s been, like, twenty minutes already. I’m getting bored.”

“It makes me feel better. Heh-hetsch!”

“Bless you. Yeah, until you get out again.”

“Thed maybe I’ll sday in here forever.” Sam sniffed loudly. “Or at least until all your clothes are thoroughly sanitized.”

“They’re in the spin cycle all the way down the hall, man. Come on out, and if you’re a good boy we can go get you some more drugs.”

“Good drugs?” Sam said hopefully. “Heh-hetsch! Hetssschhff!”

“Bless. Yeah, really good drugs.”

“Fide. I’b cobing oud.”

The water turned off and the doorknob turned. Sam walked out of the bathroom, hair dripping, a towel around his waist. The hives had spread over his entire chest and throat; he rubbed vigorously at a spot over his collarbone. His eyes looked puffy and worse than ever.

“Don’t scratch, man, might make them worse. Don’t want to take you to a hospital, we need to order some new insurance.” Dean paused; the look his younger brother gave him was so pitiful he winced audibly. “Have I mentioned how sorry I am?”

Sam stifled another sneeze into his elbow. “You can tell be,” he continued hoarsely. “When I’m under the influence of some really. Good. Drugs.”

“Right.”

Sam rubbed his nose vigorously. “God, id just won’t stop itching – hih-HETSCHEWW! Hetsscchff! Ugh.” Another loud sniffle. “It’s all over the room, man.”

“Yes, well,” Dean said cheerfully, “that’s why we shall shortly be driving to our favourite Walgreen’s in a freshly vacuumed Impala. How does that sound?”

“Incredible.” Sam dug through his duffle for some clothes. He sniffed them. “ETSSCHHUGh! Man, it’s everywhere!”

“Try some at the bottom of the bag. Maybe it hasn’t...permeated.”

When Sam had finally found some “clean” clothes, they left the motel room at last, Sam slamming the door rather violently behind him. Dean walked up to the car, then paused...something wasn’t right. He knelt down...

“Oh, for – Sam, somebody’s slashed my baby’s tires!” Goddammit, you do NOT mess with a man’s wheels!

Sam looked at him, wide-eyed, his hands covering his nose and mouth in an effort to protect himself from the outside world. “Deand, calm down.”

“I will NOT calm down, Sam!” His brother kicked the curb viciously. “Someone has - ” Dean paused again, sharp eyes picking out something on the ground beside the Impala. He squatted down, picking up a handful of fine, brown hairs.

The primal sound that came out of him was literally a snarl.

“Freakin’ Ewoks!”

Fixed spacing, you do want that right? ~ obsessed

[shygreeneyes]

Oh, Sam. Poor baby. I think I'm going to get him some Benadryl, an oatmeal bath and some nice Ewok-free sheets.

[BlueRandom]

Sam’s eyes snapped open, to see his brother’s face looming over his own. He shoved himself back into the headboard with an audible *bam,* then immediately dissolved into a sneezing fit.

I feel awful for liking that image, but the idea of Sam waking up to see Dean and reacting by jumping backwards is pretty funny ...

This is some good, good stuff! I do feel bad for him, though. And the Impala ... But your writing is so worth it.