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A few (very few!) sneezes from a trip to Ireland (M and one F)


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If the Irish are good sneezers, they were having an off day or two when I was there earlier this week. The best sneezes of the trip were before I even hit Dublin. At the airport still in Paris, very early in the morning, I was waiting in a queue to be frisked by the security guards, when I heard a quiet but distinctly wet sneeze from behind me – almost unvoiced, but recognizably masculine. It was hard to see who it was, as there were many people milling around, but eventually the sneezer gave himself away by standing with open mouth and half closed eyes, waiting for the second sneeze. A man of about 35, very dark hair, rather under average height but very trim and slim, carrying a French identity card. The second sneeze took its time – he seemed intent on not letting it go, and when it came he just aimed it at his chest, another almost voiceless TTTTTTSCCHHHHHew. No blow though. I saw him later in the airport, closer up – very good looking in fact, but no more sneezes: two must be his ration.

In the plane I found myself sitting behind a woman of about 30, very elegantly dressed with all sorts of chunky gold jewellery. She looked Antillaise, from Martinique or Guadeloupe, milk-chocolate skin, straightened hair pulled back in a bun. Before the plane took off, she gave a low single sneeze, quite unvoiced but hardly stifled… and that was it. For a while. After we were airborn though I noticed her head bobbing down violently, and I realized she was in the middle of a sneezing fit that she was doing her best to keep as quiet as she could. I may have missed the first sneezes, as she was indeed very good at stifling, but I did see four quick head bobs in quick succession and saw she was holding her nose all this time. She seemed to be on the point of going into a desperate sneezing fit, but all of a sudden it stopped, she blew her nose… and not a sound out of her again.

After this the Irish sneezes were a bit of an anticlimax. There was one at breakfast in the hotel : a beefy Irishman of about 20, looking like a rugby player, gave a very small and surprisingly childlike “choo”. On a train, a man in his 30s, also pretty tough looking, sneezed one very dry sneeze, almost like a cough and sniffed for several minutes after that. Then at the airport, on the way back, all the security staff had been in a meeting and as they all came out, one greying man in his late 40s gave a “Awooroosshh” sort of a sneeze as he rushed by. And that – apart from a very characteristic sneezing episode of a French friend of mine there – was it.

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Hmmm, even though you were dissappointed in the amount of obs you witnessed, I think you did a wonderful job re-creating them for us. Thank you for sharing! I really loved the first one form the airport. Especially the fact the he sneezed towards his chest. Very lovely! Thank you, atchoum!

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