CHEATING ...

[countless]

It is a very worrying thing to me.

In normal circumstances I am correct and not the kind of person to cheat my partner. Not at all ! Mister Universe might give it a try if he wants.

BUT when the fetish gets involved ... a big and strong male with a bad cold can make me loose control ... had it happening before ... a hidden part of me that is acting up and making me feel confused

Do you have that too ??

[Secret98]

Sorry to say, but I don't... although I also don't have a Boyfriend, but I don't think this fetish could truly mess with true love, could it? If it can I would have to speak for my self in this situation, but I wouldn't want this fetish anymore because it wouldn't be worth losing the right guy over, that's just my thoughts though

[Sneesee]

Well, I don't think this fetish should be that overpowering that it would cause someone to cheat. However, I know there was a certain someone who's sneezes leave me in a big old pile of weak! If we hadn't been at work, I might have pounced him! Just kidding! Or am I?

[King_of_the_ruins]

Well, I don't think this fetish should be that overpowering that it would cause someone to cheat. However, I know there was a certain someone who's sneezes leave me in a big old pile of weak! If we hadn't been at work, I might have pounced him! Just kidding! Or am I?

It's completely 1 thing to enjoy someone else's sneeze other than your s/o. I personally wouldn't consider it cheating without the physical acts actually happening.

[Trillium]

Yes.

NOTE: I'm editing this to indicate that I was answering the question posed in the title of the post (to cheat, or not to cheat), not the question in the body of the post about losing control of oneself over the fetish such that one couldn't (or seemingly couldn't) avoid cheating.

[Mr Sneezy]

Yes.

[Lady Tori]

Well, obviously each of us experiences and acts on the fetish in different ways, which would account for the different responses here. For me, the answer is no, but that's also because of two things: 1. I don't have a jealous partner and; 2. We make the fetish part of our intimate life. So if I listen to wavs or read stories and enjoy it, he knows that when he induces for me or whatever, I know better what I like. He wouldn't consider it cheating unless something physical happened between myself and someone else (or an emotional affair, but that would be less likely to be related to the fetish) so this system works for us.

But for other couples the boundaries could be different. I definitely think that a partner's acceptance of the fetish (as opposed to disgust or distaste for it - not necessarily a willingness to indulge it) is a crucial part of this. I know that if D thought less of me because of this fetish, I would feel worse about myself, and that would be a seriously destructive force in our relationship.

[Geist]

Nah, that doesn't happen to me. That's why I have an imagination and "alone time." I rule the fetish. The fetish does not rule me.

[Sneesee]

Okay, I know I was being silly in my last post, but I wanted to try again and be serious this time. I wanted to point out something Lady Bjork touched on. My husband, although not always indulgent of it, is very supportive of my fetish. And we have a very unique marriage, meaning that we don't get jealous of each other. Therefore, if and when I find someone else's sneezes to be attractive, my hubby isn't terribly concerned. This man also lets me be a huge flirt, too, so like I said, we have an unusual arrangment. He and I have always said that the only thing that could possibly destroy what we have would be for one of us to have an "emotional affair." If it ended up being just a physical thing, for some reason it would be easier for us to accept that the other just gave in to a temptaion of the flesh. Now, I'm not saying I would ever do this, I'm just saying we've discussed it before.

And like Aku said, I also believe I control this fetish, and try not to let it rule me. Because otherwise, I'd be doing some serious pouncing!

[JellyBelly]

No. I have control over the fetish. I know how to manage myself in relation to it.

[count tiszula]

I was going to say "yes" but actually, it can cut both ways; I mean if you've found someone whom you've actually managed to tell , and who has been accepting and reasonably indulgent, it's going to have to be a really outstanding sneezer to make you want to leave all that and indeed have to go through it all again.

I keep thinking it happened to me in my youth but in fact it was an emotional attachment that made me stray first; I don't think I'd even seen the person sneeze at all when that happened; it was only afterwards that I discovered she was a gifted and frequent sneezer. What a soppy old romantic I am.

[Secret98]

My fetish cotrols me... anyone who knows can use it against me and try not to let them know... but when I say my fetish controls me I mean it, but not the sexual part, the anxiety part... I can't explain anymore than that right now to tired...

[Mr Sneezy]

I was going to say "yes" but actually, it can cut both ways; I mean if you've found someone whom you've actually managed to tell , and who has been accepting and reasonably indulgent, it's going to have to be a really outstanding sneezer to make you want to leave all that and indeed have to go through it all again.

I keep thinking it happened to me in my youth but in fact it was an emotional attachment that made me stray first; I don't think I'd even seen the person sneeze at all when that happened; it was only afterwards that I discovered she was a gifted and frequent sneezer. What a soppy old romantic I am.

Know exactly what you mean Count. No one gets emotionally attatched like me.

And the fetish controls large parts of my life, so it is easy for someone to use it against me.....something that has been done at least twice.

*shrug* that's life experience, I guess.

[Lady Tori]

He and I have always said that the only thing that could possibly destroy what we have would be for one of us to have an "emotional affair." If it ended up being just a physical thing, for some reason it would be easier for us to accept that the other just gave in to a temptaion of the flesh.

YES. This is so true for us too. I've said to D on different occasions that it would upset me more if he cut himself off from me emotionally and started giving confidence to another person, than if he was to be physically intimate with someone else. I could forgive a momentary lapse to temptation more easily than if we lost our closeness.

[haeeshoo]

For some reason, I often find that the sneezes that give me most pleasure "afterwards"

are rather repulsive at the very moment they happen... so I doubt the fetish alone will ever cause

me to physically cheat my s/o.

[sneezy_kiwi]

Although it's occasionally something of a tenuous grip.... I do have a grip on reality. And I know the difference between reality and fantasy. The fetish is primarily in the domain of fantasy. Although there is some cross-over, there is no way that I would ever allow a fantasy to destroy/impinge/harm my real relationships.

Could ANYONE truly, realistically consider destroying their relationship with a significant other - hurting them to that extent - by cheating on them with someone who has/does something related to a fetish?

Sorry. Have no sympathy for anyone who cheats, regardless of the cause. It's the ultimate selfish, self-centred act. You want to mess around with other people, then get out of your relationship first. End of story.

-kiwi-

[Candy]

I enjoy other sneezes besides my boyfriend's but it's kind of in a strange way. Other than C, for the most part seeing someone sneeze, like, live, in person, doesn't turn me on that much. Mostly it just makes me uncomfortable. Basically, I have to find the person very attractive, and love the way they sneeze, and then it will turn me on. Now wavs and videos are another story, I'm much less picky with those. But anyway, what I've noticed is that when it comes to in-person sneezes, my SO's sneezes turn me on exponentially more than anyone else's.

[S_L]

Sorry. Have no sympathy for anyone who cheats, regardless of the cause. It's the ultimate selfish, self-centred act. You want to mess around with other people, then get out of your relationship first. End of story.

Of course in an ideal world what you say is true - but relationships come in all shapes and sizes and humans are full of faults, fears, weaknesses etc. People end up cheating on others for a vast number of different reasons and while there would be plenty of occasions where I would have no sympathy for them, there would be plenty of others where I could understand why. Nothing is ever black and white, that much I know.

Cheating for purely fetish reasons - to get back on topic - I suspect is unlikely to happen to anyone who's in a strong, solid and loving relationship. Then again if the fetish is a big enough driver in your life - and like everything else, I suspect we're all different in the degree to which the fetish works within us - maybe it could? For me, no. For others, I couldn't say.

[Dawnie]

- but relationships come in all shapes and sizes and humans are full of faults, fears, weaknesses etc. People end up cheating on others for a vast number of different reasons and while there would be plenty of occasions where I would have no sympathy for them, there would be plenty of others where I could understand why. Nothing is ever black and white, that much I know.

I couldn't agree more.

[King_of_the_ruins]

- but relationships come in all shapes and sizes and humans are full of faults, fears, weaknesses etc. People end up cheating on others for a vast number of different reasons and while there would be plenty of occasions where I would have no sympathy for them, there would be plenty of others where I could understand why. Nothing is ever black and white, that much I know.

I couldn't agree more.

ditto

[Lynne]

On its own, no. The fetish could never make me cheat on a partner. However, if there was deep emotional attachment as well.... I don't know. I've never cheated on anyone yet, but I can't guarantee I never would. All I know is that if I ever did, I would hold myself in utmost contempt, because I've always firmly believed that there is NO excuse for that. I'm not a 15 year old ball of hormones, and I *can* control myself. I also hope I'm intelligent enough to realize that love is far more important than sex, and that one brief moment of satisfaction isn't worth hurting someone I love.

[chui]

i think it would be hasty and impractical to say that cheating because of the fetish itself would never happen, but i agree that it would be highly unlikely to be walking down the street and hear someone sneeze (even repeatedly) and then go commit infidelity.

however, if there is an emotional tie already to someone other than a significant other, an emotional affair forming, if you will, it is very possible, that given a private situation, an episode relating to the fetish could instigate a physical affair. sexual attraction is something that can be controlled, in my opinion, with much less effort than emotional attraction. but if the emotional attraction is strong, it can be very difficult in certain situations to just walk away.

i personally, have very strong views regarding cheating and fidelity. my parents marriage was almost ruined by it, and i am adamantly opposed to any form of emotional or physical infidelity. but even with the strength of my views, i was almost pulled into an affair with a married man; at the time i was dating another man. this was something i was so opposed to, i became suicidal, because i could not stop the emotional ties i was developing to him. however, i could control the amount of time i spent around him, and the amount of time i was exposed to him in ways that would stimulate either of the fetishes i have. i know, as strong a person as i would claim to be at times, if i had been alone with him, that i would have done something horrible, had he used either of my fetishes to get to me. it took quite a bit of willpower to keep my distance from him, and had i not the opinions i have, things could have ended very badly.

it is very easy to say you would never cheat. and for some people, they have that amount of strength. for the rest of us, while i dont consider this to be some extreme weakness, i am forced to admit the power that sexual arousal and temptation can wield if the emotions and heart are involved, and the circumstances are permitting. so, that is just my opinion, and i must ask that you not hold my personal temptations and inner weakness against me, as i only use it for illustrative value.

[doggo]

I am controlled by my fetish. But cheating? No. But it's not like my fidelity was the case, I mean, if I was overcome by an extraordinary sneezing situation, I would be happy enough just to observe, maybe burn a hole to my chair, just enjoy the heavens brought to me like that... and be really generous to my boyfriend afterwards. And most likely have my own, "private" time. But I might be really wary of talking about that situation to anyone, even to anyone here, as I wouldn't want it to grow on my mind to dangerous dimensions. And that last one is the fidelity-part.

[Jemmabean]

Yeah, I've cheated for what was essentially a fetish-based reason before. No, I don't believe this was because I lost control over myself. Yes, I'm an asshole. No, I don't regret it.