Policy and Forum Feeling!

[Hypnos]

(There is a copy of this post available for comment in the thread here: http://www.sneezefetishforum.org/forums/in...showtopic=28900 )

I know that there have been misgivings about various aspects of the community, so I just wanted to write a quick paragraph to address what I see (from that big ivory tower I live in *points*) as the over-arching consideration. Over the next 6 months I wish for focus on the ambience and the friendly feeling / community spirit here, so I want the focus of the staff and users alike to be on a happier feeling to the forums. From the staff perspective, that means a much more light-handed approach, and all will work on their diplomacy and focus on maintaining a good spirit in the forum. From the users, I’d like to see the same commitment made, and I expect it of each and every person here. Grouchy posts out of place will be moderated against, snipes and flames will be moderated against, and negative criticism of the staff or anyone else associated with the community will be moderated against. In return, everyone will see far less of the moderators in other areas. I would encourage everyone to put some thought to what they say We will also tidy up the rules to be clearer, and seek new staff to bring new perspectives to the work done in support of the community. Actions will be taken on all fronts soon.

But that’s not all. Time was when I could put my hand on my heart and say that I felt the community needed me, or at least the work that I did and do. That time has passed. The community has moved on, at times in ways I could scarcely have once imagined, and I am ready to move on, too.

Many people have already moved on within what is a very diverse community, and are facing challenges in new places with that. I hope everything goes well for them all. I have heard that another forum has been proudly declared to be “Hypnos-free,” and even censored anyone who didn’t agree with slamming me. Thank you, censored ones, for your support, it was heartwarming to learn of. I won’t explain how unfortunately wrong those original claimants were, nor develop the so many ways. I will mention, though, that a good friend in the making told me that imitation is perhaps the greatest form of flattery, and so I’m proud to have made the contribution I have done to this community. Indeed, I’m happy too, that I have never proclaimed this forum to be free of those who would seek pride in ridding the internet, maybe even existence, of me. That doesn’t mean I don’t feel shame and humility too, so let us continue with the latter.

I can’t possibly thank everyone who deserves a special mention here, as so many people spring to mind, and many you probably wouldn’t expect. Some I would thank for a chance to shine, others for daring to see some good in me. Some I thank in spite of their words/actions for the opportunity to learn, whether it was just to learn something about them, frightening though it was, something about myself, or just something about humanity and the World in which we live. There are many I should thank for just allowing me to do what I set out to do as best I could. In any case, I’d probably forget people from the past and present silly buffoon that I am, so I’ll just say thank you, and trust that anyone reading knows what for. That’ll do for here.

In my time in the SF Community I’ve made wonderful friends, I’ve made mistakes, I’ve been appreciated and I’ve been misjudged on occasion. Some have accepted me as a human trying to do what’s right, and others have hated me for reasons I may never know or understand, and can only guess at. I mentioned shame above… some out there have seen the worst of me, and suffered for faults that I’ve certainly identified and worked on in myself. Jealousy and insecurity once held sway over me and I’m sorry to any who were affected by the negative impacts of those. I’ve often seen fault in the World and tried to fix it in my small way, but that then doesn’t mean my view is the right view, or that any changes will be appreciated. At times my youth betrayed me and I acted naively or couldn’t see the impact of my actions, while at others, I was inspired and came up with some truly cracking ideas! Sometimes I’ve been an old head on young shoulders, wise enough to see the ends, and sometimes, just too old to care as much as I should have done. Through all of that though, two things I’ve always tried to be: fair and honest. Ultimately, I only ever aimed to be a force for good, and that transposes to my life generally I feel. Where I’ve fallen short of that mark here, I can’t apologise enough, but I hope it can be accepted that I tried, and I’m sorry I didn’t have all the answers.

There are some out there for whom the same sadly cannot be said. I know of selected people who would double-cross their contemporaries, others who would never vocally raise a complaint but secretly harbour it and use it against people to subvert and undermine. I’m sure these people will go far. There are those who tell untruths in order to achieve their own ends, and sometimes even as far as I can tell, just to hurt other people, whatever that achieves. Even then, there are still some who would just attack and attack and attack whatever anyone else builds, because it’s not *their* way, so it’s not *a* way. I’ll never stop trying to overcome the darkness that these people bring to the World, but no longer here. I have greater battles to fight now, and I hope one day that those who plotted my downfall in some manner of faux conspiracy find the courage to face me in conversation, along with any who feel anything negative about me. (Or positive for that matter, or indeed nothing at all). If there are those out there in the negative bracket, I’d like to learn what it was they were told, or saw, or thought I did, or actually saw me do, that led them down that path, and why they chose hatred and misdeeds over simply engaging me in dialogue. I’d like to heal old wounds, and win back old friends and discover why there are people who think of me as a monster, and what I can do to rectify that. I’d like to seek forgiveness for where I’ve gone wrong, and the feel the hand of friendship rather than the fist of war. I hope that request can be heard and spread to those who don’t hear it, and I hope to hear from many of you in the future, and to be friends.

Thinking back, no-one ever even asked me whether it was time for me to step aside. Either way, I think that time is now. I believe it is in everyone’s interests for me to slip away, not in the quiet way I faded into the background and moved to largely behind the scenes work and a guiding role about a year ago, but to actually stand down. I always wanted this community to succeed as a happy place, and in view of that not much made me happier than the review we once had that described our community as being so, so different to most fetish sites out there. We really were a community, and I loved that.

I’ve experienced some amazingly diverse times here. I’ve learnt a lot of lessons, I’ve become a better person, and I thank you all for what we’ve shared together.

Ad astra per aspera.