Damn Cold!

[Mercury]

Fandom: Superman

Disclaimer: I own neither Krypton nor any of its exports.

Authors Notes: This is just a short, humorous thing to cure my boredom. Enjoy.

Damn Cold!

'Damn cold,' Superman thought as his impressive lung-span reached its capacity.

"Knxxt," He stifled. The hands cupping his face were pushed back slightly, and his muscles strained to keep the strangled explosion contained. "HEHH-Ngxt!" He paused to cough and rub the underside of his pink nose. His black curles were pushed from their normally impeccable condition, and now stuck up scruffily. He frame, normally large and intimidating, seemed so much smaller hunched over.

He was sitting on a rock in the Australian Outback. The desert heat warmed him, and the sun, shinning through the ozone's hole, fed him the energy that his cold had drained from him.

"Heehhhhhhh... Eeeeehhhhhh..." Superman felt the clouds shift towards him, gathering as his head tilted back and his breath drew them in. "Hhhhheeeeh...HEEAAAASSSHHHOOOOOOOOO!!!" His body jerked forward. His sneeze blew towards the earth, kicking up dust. "Ehhhhh... HAEEESSSSSSHHHHHHOOOOO!! HHHHAAEESSSSSHHHHHHHOOO!!" He sniffled, tears in his eyes.

"Aahhhhhhhh... AHHHHHHHHHHH... HHAAAHHHHHHHHH... ... ... EEEEHHHHHHHHIISSSSSSSHHHOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Superman opened his eyes, his nose throbbing and his throat raw from the explosions that had been ripped from him. Blinking tears from his eyes, he saw the dust swirling in the wind he had expelled from his lungs. It had gathered and twisted around into a wind storm. He sat in its eye, the world blurring around him in tanned granules, blocking the sun and making him tired as he lost the comfort of its rays.

Thunder roared overhead, and Superman looked up. The clouds he had pulled with his mighty breath had gathered into his own personal raincloud, which then proceeded to release its water down upon him. It drenched him, making him freezing cold in a matter of seconds, and he wrapped his red cape around his shoulders, shivering in the rain.

He wanted to cry.

Superman got up from his rock, sniffing and wiping his nose on his cape grasped tightly in his hand, feeling vulnerable and human for the first time in a long time. He walked through the wall of dust, his feet dragging behind him, just wanting to get out from the rain he had inadvertently created. But as he walked through the storm of water and dirt, the damp sand got up his flaring nostrils, and stuck there.

He felt the irritation, which made his eyes sting and flutter close. 'No' he thought, knowing the strength of the future sneeze before the breath even started to build 'I can't.'

"AAAHHHHHHHHHHH... AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..." he cupped his hands to his face, but the clouds and dust were still blocking his source of strength, and he had no chance of suppressing or stopping it without the energy provided to him by the sun.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..." He held the breath in his lungs as long as he could. His eyes watered, his ears pounded, and Superman pushed off the Earth and up into the atmosphere in an instinctive need for sunlight.

"AAAHHHHHHHHEEHCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

His eyes blinked open. A sudden wave of cold had closed in on him and he started involuntarily drifting slowly back to earth. Looking up, his dulled green eyes widened, and his red nose gave a small sniff as he thought of how screwed he was.

He had blown out the sun.

'Damn cold!'

[W.I.N.]

Okay, that was hilarious!

Also very cute. Poor Superman, he really is screwed!

~W.I.N.

[Mewling]

Excellent job, Mercury. The fic was funny, cute, and totally worth reading more than once... makes me want to give him a big hug, the poor thing. *chuckles*

[scent]

Very cute:-) .

[winterweakness]

thats real cute lol

[Weirdo Girl]

funny