Empty

[Natto]

Title: Empty

Author: Natto

Fandom/Original: Death Note (Another Note novel influenced)

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Rating: PG-13

Wordcount: 1,324

Summary: L needs to be able to fake an allergy for an investigation. A has a cold. The two are similar enough that catching A's cold is to L's benefit...as is the way he chooses to catch it.

Authors Notes: Yet another fic written for Dove--the next one I'll be posting here is for her too. So you can blame her for my use of the (awesome) Another Note characters. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this little story, and that you'll let me know what you think of it!

~`~`~

Meeting with L is the absolute last thing that A wants to do right now. These high-pressure get-togethers fill him with dread at the best of times, and this, the third day of one of the most exhausting colds he’s ever had, is not the best of times. He doesn’t want to cross the hall and walk two flights to hear things that will probably upset him; what he wants to do is stay in bed all day, leaving only to replenish his supply of tea and tissues.

But it doesn’t matter what A wants, L’s requests trump everything. Perhaps L will not be pleased by A’s viral shedding, but infection, A thinks, is not something that would be undeserved. Which is, of course, ridiculous—A is simply feeling rather stressy and spiteful right now. And so he stuffs his pockets with tissues, and stumbles tiredly towards L.

~`~`~

Midway through his journey, A is stopped in his tracks by a sudden and rather thunderous sneeze. Aside from congestion so severe it seems he will never use his nose to breathe again, he has not yet had much in the way of nasal symptoms. He’s been utterly drained of his energy, and he’s suffered a skull-breaking headache, and he’s been coughing hard enough to stop his breath. This is actually the first time that he’s sneezed since getting sick, but now that he’s started, he can’t stop. His nose now feels like it’s crawling with fire ants, and it’s a monumental effort just to stave off the fit until he gets a tissue. Twitching his nostrils furiously, he presses the tissue to his face and promptly explodes. Each sneeze is harsher and louder than the last, and each one leaves him sniffling wildly and gasping for air. After the seventh HIICHHHUH! his nose grows less insistent. He is able to remove the ruined tissue for long enough to replace it, and he’s even able to trumpet loudly into the new one before being gripped by the need to sneeze again. And he does, but this time they are mild-mannered eh-choo’s that do not snap his neck hard enough to nearly give him whiplash. Six of those end the fit completely, and he’s left a miserable, dripping mess. He isn’t quite sure what he looks like just now, but he doubts it’s anything he’d want his idol L to see.

And so he straightens his hair, blows his nose again, and coughs harshly into the overburdened tissue. Practices pronouncing words like ‘harmony’ and ‘condominium’ (which come out ‘harbody’ and ‘coddobidiub’ no matter what he tries) in the hopes of not sounding so disgustingly stuffed up. Unable to improve much of anything, he shuffles his way towards L’s room. And he is only stopped thrice more by fits of sneezing.

~`~`~

By the time A reaches L’s room, he’s used up all his tissues. This does not mean that he’s dirtied them all, it means that he’s turned them into unrecognizable pulp. His right nostril feels like it’s housing a chunk of ice, his left nostril a slushy, half melted version of that ice chunk—the mint-scented lotion he’s smeared around the rims contributes greatly to this sensation. Both of these conditions require tissues, and the more he tries to ignore them, the most he wants to blow his nose. For a moment, he considers using his sleeve, but he quickly realizes that that would be rude in front of L. Right now, L is staring him down with unblinking, raccoon eyes. “Hello A,” he says, gnawing his thumb as if it were food. “Thank you for taking the time to meet with me. You don’t appear to be feeling very well, so your extra effort is noted and appreciated.” He stops, moves from his precarious perch on an overstuffed armchair and leans so close to A that their noses touch. This of course causes A’s to itch furiously, so he backs away and sneezes into the crook of his arm.

“Don’t stand so close,” he mumbles, hands cupped around his mouth and nose to contain any further sneezes. “I really wouldn’t want you to catch my cold.”

And L says, in complete seriousness, that this is exactly what he wants. “Um…what?” A asks with a sniffle. “Forgive me if this is out of line, but why in the world would you wa….ahh…nnngh…ahhCHUH! Hipchoo! CHOO! Ugh…” Another sniflles, and L provides hm with a folded paper towel, into which he attempts to empty the lake n his nose. “I d-don’t…seeeechhoo! See how being this sick could possibly improve your life, L.”

“Oh,” L says as he unwraps a half-melted chocolate bar, pulled from the recesses of his baggy jean pocket. “It wouldn’t. I imagine I’d get rather frustrated by it within a day or so. But it won’t kill me and it could be very beneficial to me in solving a case.”

After a long coughing fit, A asks him incredulously why he needs a cold to solve his case. “It’s actually rather a hindrance,” he says. “I haven’t been able to get nearly as mu…chh…AHCHH! work done as I would have liked, I’ve just been so tired.”

“It’s not that I think it will enhance my performance,” L says, breaking off a piece of chocolate and handing it to A. A declines, his appetite has been utterly obliterated by being sick. After eating a piece of the chocolate himself, L says, “I’m trying to break up a drug ring. My research indicates that the suspects store cocaine in the intestines of twenty-four declawed cats. Despite the hidden nature of the drugs, the suspects find it necessary to completely cloak the cat’s existence. I am supposed to be interrogating the suspects in two days, under the guise of a police officer. I would prefer to pretend I did not know about the cats beforehand, so as to gouge their reaction when they are discovered. However ‘discovering’ them is difficult if I don’t see or hear them. Unless I am unusually sensitive to them in some way…say, allergic.” He stops, gnaws his chocolate, and A flails for a way to talk him out of this.

“Unfortunately,” L says. “I am unable to fake a convincing allergic reaction, and I myself have no allergies. That, A, is where your cold comes it. If I catch it from you, then I can easily pass off the cold symptoms as an allergic reaction. This will lead me to the cats. It’s a pain, but I have sacrificed far greater things than a week of good health for this job.”

Failing to come up with anything against this plan, and feeling small and pathetic because he can’t imagine even making this apparently minor sacrifice for the sake of a case, A agrees. “Okay,” he sniffs. “How do you suggest we make sure that you catch it?”

L grins, the corners of his mouth twitching unnaturally as he does. “Oh,” he says. “That’s easy. These types of viruses are best spread through mouth-to-mouth contact, and we humans have a very simple, and very pleasurable way of initiating that contact.” A knows what’s coming next, but that doesn’t help him figure out how to react to this. He tries to plan it out, prepare himself, but the only thing he can do is try to clear his nose enough to breathe through when his mentor, his idol, his God… L leans toward him. Threads long greasy fingers through lank, auburn hair. And then (oh horror, oh ecstasy) he fills his mouth with a soft, flat tongue. The kiss does not last long (nothing does) and when L parts from A his expression is completely blank. “Thank you A,” he says. “You may return to your studies now. If this does not work, I will ask for further assistance.”

A is ushered into the hallway. He has never felt so empty in his life.

[Vetinari]

Oh please don't leave this as a oneshot. I mean.....further assistance????

[VoOs]

Nng! Ok, that was so hot I think my brain just exploded. Brilliantly written. Just...wow.

[doggo]

What a brilliant idea! And how hot is this. I always adore your attention to every cold-ridden detail...

Oh I want to see how the case is solved too, with this... assistance.

[lalaland~]

This is continued, right? Right? Because the first part was too good to stop there!!!

♥

[Cerulean Flower]

Annnnnd the votes are in! You must continue? Please? This is so good! Oh L! Oh contagion!

[wishiwassneezy]

I'm super excited for the rest of this story, you must continue!!!

[Bunny-koo]

*gasps* THE FLUFF!!!!!!!!! SQUEE! <3

I agree with everyone else, you really should continue!!!!!!

Besides, A needs to feel whole again!!! <3 <3