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Tickling charm gone wrong


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This is my first attempt at writing any kind of fic, let alone a sneezing one so be gentle! :D

Alex is a random auror I made up, he would've been unnamed but it was much easier to just make one up. I figured it sound HPish enough with names like Harry, Fred, George and James floating around haha.

Not much sneezing in this first part, just setting up a couple of things. There will definitely be more later though. Hope you enjoy!


A loud clanging sound echoed across the field as a stunning spell connected with a shield charm, causing it to ricochet into the floor.

"Ha ha, I thought you'd be much faster than that, Alex!" Cackled Bellatrix Lestrange as she made her shield vanish with an almost casual flick of her wand,

"For such a highly regarded Auror I was sure I was in for at least a decent fight, but I guess the ministry truly is growing softer these days..." Then without even allowing him to retaliate, she screamed "Crucio!" with her wand pointed directly at his chest.

The effect was instant. As a jet of red light flew from the tip of Bellatrix's wand, the auror called Alex began to writhe and twitch on the ground as if he was being drenched in boiling oil, Bellatrix merely grinned and licked her lips as the sound of his screams filled the air even above the heavy rainfall taking place.

She decided to let him suffer for a few seconds, before lazily lifting the curse with a flick of her wand causing Alex's screams to ceased as he lay panting on the floor in a heap. His robes were torn from where he'd fallen previously, his blonde hair was flecked with dirt and he had several cuts on his hands and face - a face that showed a look of utmost hatred as it looked at the witch now standing mere inches away from him.

Bellatrix had approached her prey with an almost glee-filled expression on her face like a child getting a new toy before crouching down to his level, and when they were almost nose to nose, she whispered, "You'll be getting plenty more of that, you filthy disgusting mudblood."

It was like someone had lit a fire inside Alex, despite his injuries and the coldness that came with being soaked in torrential rain, he found that he wanted nothing more than to inflict pain on the woman crouched in front of him. Without warning he headbutted her on the lip, jumped to his feet and pointed his wand directly at her chest ready for battle. Bellatrix, enraged from the sudden attack had also jumped to her feet and gripped her wand tightly ready for action.

The scene seemed to freeze for a moment with nothing but the wind and rain whipping their robes around them as they stood in the field, and then at exactly the same time, both duellers began firing numerous curses, hexes and jinxes at eachother, causing the entire field to light up around them like an exploding rainbow. This went on for several minutes with each dueller fiercely slashing their wand at eachother in order to deflect and cast their own spells, but all too soon Alex felt his stamina begin to fail him and decided that it was time for desperate measures.

Hoping that Bellatrix would be caught off guard by a simple tickling charm, Alex pointed his wand straight at her and bellowed "Rictusempra!"

A jet of pink light shot from the end of his wand an managed to hit an unprepared Bellatrix directly in the face as she attempted in vain to deflect it with her wand.

The effect on her was instant as she felt her nose begin to tickle immensely, but even as she tried to fight the growing feeling inside of her, she knew it was vital that she finish the duel quickly whilst not letting on that she had been affected.

"S-So Alex" she said sniffing "I see that you're n-not completely useless after all. Although you should've kn-known that your last spell would do n-nothing."

Alex simply eyed her with contempt as she spoke, although he couldn't help noticing the way that her nose had begun to twitch occasionally as she did so, and she didn't seem to standing in the same confident manner as before either. As if noticing this, Bellatrix rubbed her nose with the back of her hand in what she hoped was a casual, off-hand kind of way to weaken his suspicions, the truth was though that it was driving her crazy.

"S-Still" she said, ignoring the curious look growing in his eyes as he stared at her, "I th-think it's time we ended our little g-" she actually paused for a couple of seconds before proceeding "game."

Alex knew now that this was it, he had tried to overpower her, he had tried to outlast her in battle and he had tried to catch her off guard, but all of his efforts had failed. He simply was not strong enough to defeat Bellatrix Lestrange.

Resigning himself to his fate, Alex closed his eyes and waited as Bellatrix raised her wand.


Alex had his eyes clenched tightly shut as he braced himself for the curse, but he could still tell that something funny was going on. Why had she stopped like that? Was she just taunting him again? He opened his eyes and saw Bellatrix still standing a few feet in front of him, wand raised, but not even appearing to pay him any attention anymore. Looking closer he realised that her eyes were only half open, her mouth was hanging open and her chest was rising and falling vigourously as she seemed to take part in an internal struggle.

This went on for a couple more seconds before her eyes closed and her body was bent forwards as she sneezed into the air with a loud HETSCHOO! ... HEASHOOO!

Temporarily dazed, Bellatrix stood up blinking away tears and sniffed before a loud *Crack!* brought her back to her senses. Her panic mounting, she quickly scanned her surroundings for any sign of a blonde haired wizard, and upon failing to sight one, swore loudly into the field.

A second *Crack!* later and the field was empty.


Far away in a distant manor, an identical *Crack!* could be heard as Bellatrix appeared in the Malfoy's residence, drenched from head to foot and still rubbing at her nose attempting stifle the persistant tickle that had developed. A soft voice from the corner of the room made her jump, shaking water onto the floor as she whipped around to find the source.

"Oh it's you Lucius, what did you say?"

Lucius Malfoy eyed her with some interest before repeating what he had said previously, "I said that it's about time you were back, the dark lord grows weary of awaiting your arrival. He expects to see you immediately."

To be continued...

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Your first fic? With or without sneezing? I wouldn't have been able to tell! :D Very, very interesting and creative so far! Can't wait for more :drool:

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Excellent! Bellatrix's potential sneeziness is seldom exploited enough [and HB-C's other roles reveal messiness as one of her many acting skills]. And yes. the construction of this chapter is classic; more to come of course.....

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Excellent! I've wanted to see a bellatrix fic for ages...in fact I was going to write one but I didn't have time to make the story work properly...looks like you did my work for me :gah: Just kidding.

Must have more! Pleeeaaase?

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Me = speechless.

I have been keeping my eyes peeled for a Bellatrix fic forever! Can't wait for more...I wonder how it's going to be like with her needing to sneeze in front of Voldy...

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  • 2 weeks later...

I really hope that this is in character enough (it's obviously not completely :angry: )

I'm also unsure about whether I'll continue this fic now, but I am planning one with Bellatrix Black at Hogwarts too.

Anyway, enjoy!

If there was one thing Bellatrix didn’t want to do, it was to keep the dark lord waiting - his temper was frightening at the best of times and her mission hadn’t exactly gone smoothly either. She rubbed her nose fiercely with her fist as she thought about the events that had taken place a few minutes ago, how had she let that disgusting mudblood escape?!


The irony was wasted on her as she navigated the long halls of Malfoy Manor, not caring about the trail of water droplets she left behind.

Bellatrix came to a halt outside a large black door with solid silver serpents for handles, and, cursing softly at her tickly nose, she composed herself by brushing a long dark curl from her eyes and smoothing out her dress. But Before she had had the time to dwell on her nose (which had now turned slightly pink), she heard a high, cold voice say “Enter, Bellatrix.” from within, and she had no choice but to do as it commanded.

Voldemort was standing with his back to the door as Bellatrix entered the room, pale as a ghost with his white skin contrasting against his black robes. A fire crackled in the fireplace to his left, but the image was anything but warm.

“Greetings, my lord” said Bellatrix as she knelt down on the cool marble floor, sniffing slightly as she did so.

“Ah, Bellatrix...” Voldemort turned around slowly, twiddling his wand in between his long white fingers as he addressed the death eater before him. “You failed your mission.” Voldemort was in no mood for games, and The statement went through Bellatrix like an icy wind as she forced herself not to shudder at his now pacing footsteps.

Her nose was still tickling and she was desperately resisting the urge to do something about it infront of her master, but she could tell that it would be a losing battle if she wasn’t dismissed soon.

“Did Lord Voldemort not inform you that it was vital for the auror Alex to be disposed of?”

“Y-yes my lord” murmured Bellatrix, “please forgive me”

“Forgive?” whispered Voldemort, his voice deadly “Lord Voldemort does not forgive Bellatrix.”

Bellatrix averted her eyes from her master to look down at the floor. The tickle in her nose was driving her insane, and she knew that showing any sign of weakness in front of the dark lord was not an option, but even as she desperately tried to wriggle her nose in defiance of the inevitable, she felt her eyelids flutter as her breath began to hitch.

“Hennngk!” Bellatrix tried her best to discretely sneeze into her arm, and was especially thankful for the long dark curls which hid her face in her position on the floor, but this did nothing to stop the charm’s assault on her nose . It was during this that she realised her master had stopped talking.

“Hetschh! ... He-HETCHOO! I-I’m Sorry My L- ETSCHUU!” The last one had caught her by surprise and she quickly raised her fist to her now streaming nose as she blinked tears from her eyes.

Mortified, Bellatrix had nothing to say but “I’m sorry, my lord” before she stopped and bowed her head once more.

Voldemort had been watching Bellatrix with interest as she lost control to her sneezes. He had never seen his most faithful servant break down in front of him before and he found the experience quite… mesmerizing. Upon realising that she had finished and was waiting for him to continue though, he decided to push it to the back of his mind for the time being – she had still failed him after all and he was furious as a result.

He raised his wand and began the punishment that he summoned her for: “Crucio!”

Bellatrix shrieked as the spell suddenly hit her and she began to writhe on the floor in agony, she had been once again desperately trying to fight against the persistent tickle, and the sudden curse had caught her by surprise. Biting her lip, she managed to stop herself from screaming out in pain - she would not show her weakness in front of her master again!

After around 30 seconds Voldemort flicked his wand to lift the curse, and breathing heavily, Bellatrix resumed her kneeling position, forcefully rubbing her fist across her (now red) nose under the pretence of wiping off the blood from her lip.

“Stand, Bellatrix” came the cold voice from above her, and slowly, she did as she was told.

“You have disappointed Lord Voldemort today Bellatrix” he said, his snake-like red eyes boring into her startling black ones. “I’ll have to think twice about sending you on such important missions in future.”

Bellatrix gasped as the meaning of his words hit her, “My lord, please! I am perfectly capable of disposing of mudbloods and blood traitors! Today was-” She stopped talking as her master raised one of his spider like hands for silence. “You are going to show me exactly what happened earlier” came the response, and after stepping so close to her that they were face to face, Voldemort wordlessly delved into Bellatrix’s memory of the battle.

Bellatrix didn’t resist as she felt her master parsing through her memories, but as it got to the point of her preparing for the killing curse, a sharp tickle attacked her nose causing her breath to hitch again for the second time in the meeting.

Misinterpreting her urgency, Voldemort made a small noise of annoyance as the memory began to distort from Bellatrix’s attempt to end it, but he was incredibly skilled at occlumency and wasn’t about to be lied to by anyone.

In her immobile state, Bellatrix made one final attempt to warn her master, “He-M-My Lord, I-I’m going to S… HETSCHUUUH!!” Bellatrix sneezed her loudest one yet, and the sound seemed to magnify tenfold in the cavernous chamber as she found herself staggering backwards, uncertain whether it was because of the force of the sneeze or her master suddenly exiting her memories.

“Master!” she gasped, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean-“

“Hush Bellatrix” Voldemort snapped as he took at his wand and pointed it at her. Bellatrix resisted the urge to flinch as she lowered her head and awaited the pain that was sure to come, but was immensely surprised when her master hissed the words “Finite Incantatem” instead of the cruciatus curse she was expecting.

“My lord?” she questioned.

“A tickling charm, Bellatrix, you were hit by a simple tickling charm.”

Realisation slowly dawned on Bellatrix as her mind flashed back to the events of the battle, how could she have been so stupid? Echoing her thoughts, Voldemort said “Whilst your stupidity somewhat amuses Lord Voldemort, you have failed an important mission because of it. You will sit next to your sister during our next meeting Bellatrix, Severus will take the seat to my immediate right instead. Now go.” And with a swipe of his wand, the large doors she had entered through reopened and he turned his back on her once again.

Bellatrix winced as she felt tears stinging her eyes at her master’s words, she wanted more than anything to respond, to make him trust her again, but the firmness of the dismissal and the magnitude of her mistake made her realise just how lucky she was to be alive instead, and she quickly exited the room looking back at her master once more as she did so.

Voldemort would have usually punished such a failure a lot more severely – that is to say that Lucius would be lucky to even be able to walk right now, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do the same to Bellatrix – not when he had enjoyed their meeting so much anyway…

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  • 7 months later...

So I've decided to continue this fic for a bit due to the lack of Bellatrix I can find on here and the fact that I've finally thought of a way to continue it!

Yet again there's not a ridiculous amount of sneezing, and I've taken it in a little bit of a different direction now, but I really hope you like it! I'm trying hard here! smile.png

Once safely on the other side of the huge black doors, with the silver serpents glinting at her, Bellatrix composed herself. She was truly devasted at her master’s words, but there was no way she was going to show it infront of anyone else – especially not in Malfoy manor where she could bump into the likes of Lucius, or worse, Severus.

With her head held high, Bellatrix left the building leaving a trail of wet footprints behind her. Luckily she didn’t encounter anyone on the way. Once she got past the wards at the front gates she apparated back to her own home, Lestrange Manor.

One consolation that she had from all of this was that her disgusting husband Rodolphus was still away on a mission of his own and she had the place to herself.

As soon as she got through the front door she kicked off her wet shoes and flopped down on the couch with an upset sigh.

Getting changed could wait 5 minutes. It wasn’t long however before she fell asleep as exhaustion from the day took over her.

Bellatrix began to stir the next morning as sunlight streaming through the still-open curtains brought her back to her senses. Groaning, she lifted a hand to her head and sat back against the cushions. She felt awful. “Hetchew!” sneezed Bellatrix suddenly, “That bloody rain!” she exclaimed at no-one as she sat up.

“Lemmy!” There was a loud crack as an ugly creature with tennis ball sized eyes and a bulbous nose wearing a black pillowcase appeared in front of her, “yes mistress!” she squeaked, “Lemmy is pleased to see her mistress back home!”

“Alright shut up” said Bellatrix, although she almost smiled, truthfully she was pretty fond of the elf but she’d never show it. “Lemmy, I need you to make me some chicken soup a-and…“ she turned to the side as her eyes desperately fluttered shut, “ATCHOO! ...and prepare some pepper-up potion, bring it to me in my room when you’re done.”

“Yes mistress! Blessings you mistress!” squeaked Lemmy before she disappeared with another crack.

Bellatrix moaned again as she got off of the sofa and slow shuffled towards her bedroom for a warm shower. Halfway up the stairs she stopped as a now annoying tickle in her nose began to take over again. She opened her mouth slightly as her breath began to hitch, and one of her hands waved in front of her face waiting. “H-he-heeehhh- … ARGH! I hate it when that happens!!” Giving up on the stuck sneeze, Bellatrix carried on up to her bedroom and quickly undressed before getting into the shower.

The warm water soothed her greatly and felt a lot better than her soaking the previous day. Once she was satisfied she emerged from her ensuite completely dry, put on her favourite green pajamas and got straight under her silky black bedsheets, ensuring that her wand was within reach on top of The Daily Prophet on her bedside table.

As she lay there sniffling and going over ways she could please the dark lord in her mind, someone knocked on her bedroom door before walking in without waiting for an answer.

Bellatrix looked up and mentally groaned at the person who now stood in the room with her. Narcissa Malfoy, as one of Voldemort’s inner circle was one of the most feared people in the war, but she was also one of the most caring when it came to the people she loved. Bellatrix decided to try and get rid of her younger sister as soon as possible, lest she discover her illness.

Narcissa didn’t falter as she locked her icy blue eyes against her older sister's startling black ones.

“I don’t rebember ledding you id.” said Bellatrix mentally cursing her stuffy nose.

“Yes, well I thought you’d be too… lazy to” smirked back Narcissa whilst looking over Bellatrix as she lay in bed.

“Leave be alode Cissy, I’b s-“ Bellatrix almost slipped and said the word in front of her sister, but she knew that she’d never get rid of Narcissa if the younger black sibling knew that she was ill, and she really did just want some time alone after yesterday. “I’b… readig the paper!”

“You sound sick.” Stated Narcissa.

“Darcissa, I ab dot sick, dow go away! I’ll talk to you toborrow.”

The younger sibling raised her eyebrows at this, “My name isn’t Darcissa” she smirked, “And I don’t believe you.”

Bellatrix glared at her sister, “Dar- Cissy, I’b-… I ab-“ she sighed at her attempts to sound ok, “I feel great.”

Narcissa narrowed her eyes as she stared hard at her older sister’s face taking in the tiredness and slightly pink nose whilst Bellatrix looked defiantly back at her.

At the worst possible moment though, Bella felt the tickle in her nose return and she was quickly fighting to remain composed under the watchful eye of her sister.

Finally giving up, Narcissa began to leave, “Well if you’re sure Bella” she said, “I was just stopping by to see if you were ok after your meeting with the dark lord, but I’ll come back tomorrow if that’s ok?”

Bellatrix wasn’t even listening anymore. Her lips had once again parted as her chest dramatically rose and fell. Her eyes fluttered shut and her nostrils flared just as Narcissa turned to face her for an answer.


Narcissa rolled her eyes and watched as her sister straightened up and wiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand.

Bellatrix, slightly dazed, looked up only to find Narcissa still standing in the doorway, arms folded with a triumphant expression on her face.

She flopped back into her pillows and groaned. Today was going to be a headache in more ways than one.

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  • 3 months later...

Oh Lord....

I don't know why, but when reading the HP books/ fics, I always picture the characters as I think they should look like, not as the people who acted them, since I didn't really see much Harry movies, but I ALWAYS have HBC on my mind while reading about Bellatrix.

That would mean that, thanks to you, I just saw miserable Helena Bonham Carter having sneezing fits. And she is one very attractive woman, to be clear. :)

Thank you!

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  • 4 weeks later...

Nice. I wish I could use that spell in real life.

Please continue writing these awesome stories.

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