What We'd Like vs. Real Life

[zneeze]

Whoa, zneeze still posts here?

This isn't meant to be a sad topic, more like a way to loosen up and laugh at ourselves a little bit. We've all had those times when we wish it were easier to be a sneeze fetishist, i.e. when we never get to see someone we want to see sneeze, sneeze, or we miss them sneezing, and so on. There are so many things like this that irk us. Basically, the idea of this game is to post a sneeze-related or fetish-related instance, situation, etc. that you would like to have happen to you. Beneath that, you also say what would most likely happen instead, knowing our luck You write both what you'd like and what really happens/what would happen. Hopefully you think that's a fun idea!

I'll give you two examples to start.

Fetish World: Attractive girl FB status: ugh, caught a cold >.<

See her sneeze 7 times the next day at school, work, etc.

Real Life: Attractive girl FB status: ugh, caught a cold >.<

No visible symptoms

Fetish World: Offers attractive sneezer a tissue: "Oh, well thank you! You're so sweet." *blows attractively* "I needed that!"

Real Life: Offers attractive sneezer a tissue: "Um, no I'm fine. Ew..."

[Blah!?]

Ohh, this sounds like fun. xD

Fetish World: "I have to sneeze... ...Oh, it went away."

Said sneeze actually comes back later, possibly in force.

Real Life: "I have to sneeze... ...Oh, it went away."

That's the end of it. The sneeze never comes back.

Fetish World: You enter a room and one of your friends says "You missed it, I just had a sneezing fit."

They have another fit later while you're there, or at least one more sneeze.

Real Life: You enter a room and one of your friends says "You missed it, I just had a sneezing fit."

Again, that's it. Nothing else happens.

[Morningsmith]

Fetish world: You undergo a spat of vocal sneezing in the presence of an attractive second party.

Him/Her: "Bless you! I've been sneezing all day too. Need a tissue?"

Real world: You undergo a spat of vocal sneezing in the presence of an attractive second party.

Him/Her: *looks away*

Fetish world: Perky young thing taking your call interrupts you with the words "Excuse me, I have to sneeze."

S/He sneezes loudly into the reciever several times.

Real world: S/He turns of the headset, so all you hear is on-hold music.

[tma]

Fetish world: Attractive person in room has beautiful fit, preferably whilst sitting next to you.

Real World: If there is a fit, it is either family member or Completely unattractive person and you want to poke eye w/ fork.

Fetish world: Person that you are hiking with has hayfever

Real World: You do *and you aren't into your own*

Fetish World: people that you want to "get it", do

Real World: Not so much

Fetish World: Characters have colds with preferable symptoms that *last*

Real World: Not so much.

[Tangerine]

Fetish world: S.O. suddenly has a wonderful fit while the two of you are home alone together.

Real World: S.O. suddenly has a wonderful fit while surrounded by your entire family.

[VoOs]

Fetish World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You see and hear the result everywhere around you as soon as you go out.

Real World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You spend an entire day out in public without hearing so much as a sniffle.

[alias]

Fetish world: You pull off a perfect half-stife and get a smile and blessing from friend/crush.

Real world: You attempt to stifle and end up making an embarrassing imploding noise. Awkward silence follows.

Fetish world: You have a fun night with your best friend and end up telling him/her about the fetish. They are interested and want to know all about it, vowing to keep your secret.

Real world: They laugh at you and tell everybody and never let you live it down whenever someone sneezes.

[Wishing]

Great thread, zneeze!

Fetish World: You go out for lunch with a friend. Your allergies start acting up and you have a sneezing fit half way through the meal. Both your friend and the waiter bless you, show you concern and offer to bring you water, tissues, etc.

Real World: You go out for lunch with a friend. Your allergies start acting up and you have a sneezing fit half way through the meal. Your friend just ignores you, and the waiter and other diners give you disgusted looks.

Fetish World: Your SO has a bad cold. You suggest that he takes the day off work so you can look after him (and of course get to hear him sneeze, and maybe even catch it off him). He agrees and lets you indulge in your caretaking role.

Real World: Your SO has a bad cold. You suggest that he takes the day off work so you can look after him (and of course get to hear him sneeze and maybe even catch it off him). He refuses, and goes to work anyway, then emails you later to tell you he's sneezed at least a dozen times while in the office.

[Chanel_no5]

Fetish World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You see and hear the result everywhere around you as soon as you go out.

Real World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You spend an entire day out in public without hearing so much as a sniffle.

How annoyingly accurate this is. The damn media warn people so those with allergies stuff themselves with meds or stay at home.

[Wishing]

Fetish World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You see and hear the result everywhere around you as soon as you go out.

Real World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You spend an entire day out in public without hearing so much as a sniffle.

How annoyingly accurate this is. The damn media warn people so those with allergies stuff themselves with meds or stay at home.

This....exactly. So annoying .

[R.L]

Real World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You spend an entire day out in public without hearing so much as a sniffle.

Real World: Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in you city.

Your SO takes meds and doesn't "suffer" nearly as much as you'd like to. You end up in hospital due to some srs breathing difficulties.

[Sitruuna]

fuckinfuckinfuck B| I had written A LONG response and then it all disappered! Damn shit, I won't write it as nicely as I first wrote...

Darling, may I correct you:

Real life:

Paper reports about record-breaking pollen counts in your city.

You hope you'll get some nice symptoms so you can attentionwhore to your SO. You get nothing but your SO ends up in the hospital.

Another point of view to the same thing

Fetish world:

You have mild allergies...

...that suddenly stop being so mild when you get together with your SO.

Real life:

You have some not-so-mild allergies...

...That suddenly disappear when you get together with your SO.

B|

Anyway... xD

Fetish world:

After you move in with your SO you suddenly get more prone to bad colds.

Real life:

After you move in with your SO... your 5 year chain with no colds continues.

*wanders off continuing the cursing in Finnish*

Edited May 31, 2012 by Sitruuna

[Chanel_no5]

Fetish world: Someone you've been aching to see sneeze says "Ohh I can't stop sneezing today..."

... and they certainly can't.

Real world: Someone you've been aching to see sneeze says "Ohh I can't stop sneezing today..."

...and they don't even seem sniffly.

[SweaterWeather]

Okay, this one's not very original but...

Fetish World: An attractive character on a tv show catches a nasty cold. Massive amounts of sneezing, nose-blowing, care taking, contagion, etc.

Real World: An attractive character on a tv show catches a nasty cold. Minimal to zero amounts of sneezing, nose-blowing, care taking, contagion, etc.

[Rhomberg Rabbit]

Fetish world; Someone you want to see sneeze has a fit of at least a dozen

Real world; Once and done

Edited June 1, 2012 by Mayor McSneeze

[cheech]

Fetish World- person you want to see sneeze continuously sniffles all night long, and this eventually leads to a sneeze- or multiple sneezes.

Real Life- person you want to see sneeze continuously sniffles all night long, and that's it. no sneezes. no nothing. just a big tease.

That ^ is my life story!

[Pearlised]

Fetish world:

You run into someone who's suffering an allergy attack, you offer them a tissue and you have a conversaton about it

Real world:

You run into someone who's suffering an allergy attack, you accidently elbow them in the face, their nose starts bleeding and they run away -.-'

Fetish world:

You move schools and manage to befreind the sneeziest guy there

Real world:

You move schools and manage to get outcast and the whole school seems allergy proof -.-'

[Sawdust]

Fetish World:

Being present for my roommates full long sneezing fit

Real World: Always missing it....

[Sitruuna]

...inpired by a couple of offtopic comments in another thread:

Fetish world:

There is a bunch of Castiel sick fics just lying around waiting for you to read them.

Real world:

...there's about two Cas fics out there.

[zneeze]

Wow guys, this turned out really great! Glad everyone likes the game, and thanks for the compliments

Fetish World: "Omg, babe I can't stop sneezing today!" on a date.

Real World: "Omg, babe I can't stop sneezing today!" in a text message, on a day you aren't going to see him or her.

[Natto]

Fetish world: The co-worker you have a crush on comes in with a cold and sneezes his face off your whole shift.

Real world: The co-worker you have a crush on comes in with a cold and doesn't sneeze once. He then passes his cold to a co-worker you are not attracted to at all, and he sneezes his face off the next shift you have with him!

Fetish world: Your hot best friend has terrible allergies and you get to watch her have sneezing fits on a regular basis.

Real world: The only person you know with allergies is your grandmother. You get to watch her have sneezing fits on a regular basis. (Blech!)

Fetish world: Your favorite actor has a cold, and the show he's on decides to take advantage of this and have him be sick in an episode.

Real world: Your favorite actor has a cold, but covers it up so well on the show he's on that you'd never know he was sick.

[Candy]

Fetish world: Your SO has allergies, and you're about to move. It turns out the new climate makes him/her even sneezy and snifflier but he/she doesn't seem to mind as long as you take care of them

Real world: Your SO has allergies, and you're about to move. It turns out the new climate makes his/her allergies completely disappear

Fetish world: Someone you're attracted to has a sneezy cold, you catch and commiserate together in sneeziness

Real world: Someone you're not attracted to has a cold, sneezes like crazy, you catch it and don't sneeze once

[Ciel]

Fetish world: Gigantic sneeze from attractive male teacher. "Whoa - snff - that was a big one." *smiling sheepishly* Proceeds to blow his nose into a handkerchief, triggering several uncontrolled wet sneezes.

Real world: Gigantic sneeze from attractive male teacher. A polite "Excuse me."

Fetish world: It's flu season and both you and your friend have a bad cold. You share kleenex in sniffly misery and have a wonderful conversation about how sneezy you have been today.

Real world: It's flu season and both you and your friend have a bad cold. Your friend sneezes and blows his/her nose only within the privacy of the toilet cubicle. (sigh... story of my life)

Fetish world: You see a nice-looking girl sitting alone in a cafe battling a fit of sneezes which looks like a nasty cold. You offer to drive her home.

Real world: You see a nice-looking girl sitting alone in a cafe battling a fit of sneezes which looks like a nasty cold. You offer to drive her home. She considers you to be a pervert.

[JenJen]

Fetish world: Gigantic sneeze from attractive male teacher. "Whoa - snff - that was a big one." *smiling sheepishly* Proceeds to blow his nose into a handkerchief, triggering several uncontrolled wet sneezes. Real world: Gigantic sneeze from attractive male teacher. A polite "Excuse me."

Omg attractive male teachers. <3 They gave me life in high school.

Fetish World: Attractive male teacher is sniffling through class, remarks that they may be getting sick. The next day they're just a wreck, sneezing and snuffling and looking worn out and delicioussss~

Real World: Attractive male teacher is sniffling through class, remarks that they may be getting sick. The next day, you have a substitute teacher. *endless sobbing*

[VividBubbles!]

Fetish World: Attractive male teacher is sniffling through class, remarks that they may be getting sick. The next day they're just a wreck, sneezing and snuffling and looking worn out and delicioussss~

Real World: Attractive male teacher is sniffling through class, remarks that they may be getting sick. The next day, you have a substitute teacher. *endless sobbing*

^This. Oh my gosh, this. *starts to sob with JenJen*

Fetish World: Guy you like soooo much catches a cold. Your teacher moves you to sit next to him and the cold lasts like 2 weeks complete with coughing, sneezing, and general pathetic, adorable coldliness. You discuss with him how bad he feels and you provide much sympathy.

Real World: Guy you like soooo much catches a cold. It lasts 2 weeks and you barely get a snifle (lots of coughing though, which was sorta nice) out of him. Your teacher also moves you to the other side of the room where you can't even look at him without turning around all the way and looking like a creeper. He also pays you no attention whatsoever and is taken care of by a girl you do not like AT ALL and is known as an overall slut.

Fetish World: Your attractive teacher comes in on Monday and announces to the class that he caught a cold over the weekend and still wasn't over it. He then sneezes and tells everyone that instead of doing worksheets we'll watch some of a documentary. The rest of class he sneezes regularly (after which he gives a sheepish smile and mumbles a quiet "sorry" which only you seem to notice) and snifles and even blows his nose a couple of times. You also happen to be sitting in the desk to the right of his where it's very easy to be inconspicuous about watching his sneezes.

Real World: Your attractive teacher comes in on Monday and asks your class how their weekend was. After he tells the whole class about a horrible cold he came down with during the weekend but he's pretty much all better now. You blush from your head to your toes and everyone looks at you weirdly, but you still have a little bit of hope because he said "pretty much" better and he's pinching the bridge of his nose like he has a headache so maybe, just maybe, you might get something..... He sniffs. Once.

Fetish World: The teacher you absolutely hate is gone for the week and replaced by an attractive young man who has a bit of a cold. It's not enough to make him miserable so you get a different sub but it does make him sneeze and snifle quite a lot. When he leaves your delighted to find out the the adorable boy who sits across from you has caught the attractive sub's cold.

Real World: The teacher you absolutely hate is gone for the week and replaced by an even older lady who you hate even more. She ends up having a horrible cold that leaves her coughing, sneezing, and blowing her nose constantly. However, she doesn't ask to be excused, she simply works through it. When your regular horrid teacher returns it turns out she has caught the sub's cold.

I definitely have more of these but I don't feel like overflowing this thread with my fetish-scenarios-that-didn't-happen bitterness.

P.S. @Sitruuna

You want some more Castiel sickfics? Hmmm, maybe I could help you out with that. I mean, I want to, but if I started something I'd probably never finish it. Hmm, maybe I'll try a drabble or one-shot thingy? I don't know. Hmmm.

Edited July 27, 2012 by VividBubbles!