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Sneeze talk memory (no sneezing)


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A great sneeze memory for me happened back when I was in the service in the Nineties. ( I know, ancient history). I was on temporary duty in Italy during the summer for three months. It was a great time in my life that I always remember fondly. Anyway, during my last week there I had a brief relationship with a girl who was also in the service and leaving that week as well. We spent our last weekend in a small hotel room near the beach. It was an amazing time. She was a tall blonde girl who was athletically built with a fun personality.

One night we were laying in bed talking when I felt a tickle. I thought I would sneeze but lost it. Since I had not heard her sneeze or even sniffle, I figured I'd see how she'd respond to sneezing as a topic. I told her about my lost sneeze and wasn't it frustrating when that happened. She enthusiastically agreed that it was very frustrating and that nothing felt better than a good satisfying sneeze. Then she said with a giggle, "But you don't want me to sneeze!"

At this I start tingling all over, for course. I did my best to produce a non-committal reply, "What do you mean?" She replied,"My sneezes are really loud. I can't help it. It's kind of a pain in the ass sometimes." She had a humorous tone but was also very matter of fact. At this point I'm about as aroused as a sneeze fetishist can be, in the sack with a beautiful girl, discussing her sneezing issues. But I'm paranoid that she'll notice my unusual level of interest on this topic. So the best I can come up with is a lame reply, "Really? They're that bad?" She responds lightly,"Oh yeah. My roommate tells me I ought to give people a warning." So at this point I'm floating on the bed. Can I stretch this wonderful conversation out anymore without looking like a freak? I risk one more word on the subject, I just can't help it. "Well, I'm a loud sneezer as well so it won't bother me." It still sounds causal, but I instantly regret saying it. Why didn't I just stop while I was ahead!? But what happened next was wonderful. She held me tighter and kissed me lightly," Aw, what a sweet couple we make, as long as there's tissue!" We both laugh then and I'm exhilarated, for a pre-Internet sneeze lover, it's pretty rarified air. After that, we found other things to do besides talk.

After that weekend we went back to our permanent duty stations, her's in the States, mine in Japan. We never saw each other again. Strange that one of my favorite sneeze memories didn't even involve a sneeze. Thanks for letting me share. Happy New Year!

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