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The Kneezle

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Okay, so I went to see The Hobbit tonight, and I swear half the people in that theater were sick (including me, unfortunately :(). I like movie theaters because everybody's quiet and close together and you almost always get one good sneeze.

Well anyway, there were a lot tonight. A guy behind me let out a muffled "Hekesh!" and kept sniffling and stifling sneezes that sounded more like snorts. His girlfriend kept blessing him. My friend even sneezed once, but it sounded more like a caugh.

But the best one was this kid sitting right next to me. He was probably like five years younger than me, so fourteen, so it was more like a cute little brother thing.

Well before the movie even starts, he turns to his friend and says "hey, did you grab any napkins? I'be - I've - hih - hihtksh!"

His friend passes him a napkin, and they're all, you know, making fun of him and stuff for being delicate and you can tell he's blushing.

So about half-way into the movie, I hear this really breathy, pinched "Tch!" out of the corner of my eye I can see the kid with the napkin crumpled up under his nose taking these silent gasps of air. Then he pitches forward with another "Tch!"

So that goes on for a little while, until finally he can't stifle them anymore. He leans forward and puts his face in his hands (that one pitiful napkin has got to be totally destroyed by now). I can hear his shaky, uneven breathing, "hehhh hehh-ah" but he's holding back until the loud scenes where he can let loose a volley of really breathy, wet sort of "huh-shoo!"s. poor kid isn't even watching the movie.

Eventually he gets up and when he comes back about ten minutes later, he's loads better.

At the end of the movie we're all getting up and suddenly he sneezes (his strawberry blond fringe flops into his eyes every time) and slips down a couple sairs.

I tell him bless you and he blushes a little and apologizes for being so obnoxious during the movie and I tell him it's fine. On the way out, this adorable guy closer to my age who could only be this kid's brother or at least cousin puts his arm around him and asks if he's getting sick. The kid sniffles and his brother or whoever starts digging in his pocket for a tissue to give to him. I didn't hear the answer but aww, it was cute.

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Adorable. I'm guessing the big brother was trying to impress you since he hadn't offered

The tissue during the movie ;)

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