Your Style of Love

[Kuchafya613]

Okay, so this psychologist named John Lee discovered 6 basic types of romantic love:

Eros: passionate, physical love

Ludus: love played like a game of conquest, sometimes with multiple partners

Storge: affectionate love stemming from friendship

Pragma: love with the head, rather than the heart

Mania: obsessive, possessive love, often like a roller coaster

Agape: selfless, occasionally self-sacrificing love

I myself am a storgic lover; I want to be friends first, friends always, friends regardless of how we work (or didn't work) in a relationship. In my minimal "love life," this has worked out just fine, since they seemed to want something similar. However, the one fetishist I met and interacted with online...this wasn't the case. (I don't think she's on here, but if she is, she'd agree that it didn't work out. At all.) (It's somewhat of a long story, which might be better suited for another thread.)

So I was wondering...what type of lover are you? And how has this related to your fetish in relationships? (Or, if you're like me and you haven't been in a relationship, how do you think it would play out?)

[Arty]

I would be both storage and agape.

[MoonDuck]

I have absolutely no idea. I've never been in a relationship. Although, the two people I've had a crush on for a long time are my friends, so I would guess storage.

[SexualOddity]

My understanding of Lee's theory is that one person can love in all of those different ways and that it's the relationship that will dictate the type of love rather than the person giving it, and you can have elements of multiple different types of love in a single relationship.

[March Hare]

Storge, not storage. Damn you, AutoCorrect.

A combination of Storge, Pragma and Agape for my current relationship, but in the past there have been episodes of total Eros/Mania loving, and during my more active student society years plenty of Ludus was going on as well. We live and learn.

[Kuchafya613]

My understanding of Lee's theory is that one person can love in all of those different ways and that it's the relationship that will dictate the type of love rather than the person giving it, and you can have elements of multiple different types of love in a single relationship.

Huh...interesting. I was under the impression that a person generally has two main types of love -- one from the first three and one from the second three. This can change over time, but it often doesn't. And the elements of different loves become more apparent according to the other person's love types and how these love types interact accordingly.

[squealofapproval]

I am in Storge with my best friend and this has caused me to think that Storge is the only kind I'll ever achieve, but also Agape because that's the kind of friend I try to be.

Edited January 11, 2014 by Super_Awko

[GenieBenie]

I have absolutely no idea. I've never been in a relationship. Although, the two people I've had a crush on for a long time are my friends, so I would guess storage.

Exactly this

[Merc_With_A_Mouth_69]

The only relationship I've had was with someone who had been my best and closest friend for over a year first, and when we did start dating, it was basically like we became even closer friends that also liked to do sexy-fun stuff together. And I can't imagine ever being in a relationship without being really good friends first or being in a relationship that lacks that intensely high level of friendship. So I'd have to say my love style is Storge.

Of course, these days my love life is more like in Storage... Haha