Attracted to... friendship?

[Sophie<3]

Hey folks! (:

Ever since I've admitted that I have this fetish, I've been trying to explore it more and more (as most of us probably try to do), simply because... you know, I want to know exactly what I'm into. Of course, our fetish (and maybe all fetishes, who knows) is a complex matter. For most of us, it's not as simplel as: Yeah, sneezing is great. Period.

In my case, reading stories has helped me explore my fetish. Some stories would "do something" to me, others I'd stop reading after a while. This way I found out that I like colds a lot more than I like allergies and that I like fevers and that I don't mind if any non cold-related symptoms are mentioned and loads of other things.

But there's one thing that I've noticed that just really confuses me. What I really, really like are stories in which boys, preferably best friends, but brothers are just as good, interact. It doesn't even have to be caretaking (even though that's awesome), it can also be teasing or even annoyance, as long as one of the boys acknowledges the illness and the sick person responds in some way. I've recently realized that I like these types of stories even more than caretaking stories where a couple is involved.

Now... I'm just not sure what to make of this. It's even true for real life. I love when my boyfriend takes care of me, and I love taking care of him, but when he's sick and his friends are around and they talk about it somehow...!!<3 Or that one time when his older brother was sick and he offered to make him tea and asked how he was feeling, I practically melted!

But what is it that I'm actually attracted to?? It's a sexual fetish, so why do I love it when it leads to non-sexual interaction between friends or siblings? This just really confuses me.

Am I making any sense to anybody out there? Anyone else have similar feelings? I'm at a loss here. And I'd just really like to understand my own feelings, so please help me out. By the way, you guys are usually great at helping me figure out my own sexuality/personality, so I'm really excited for responses.

Love you all, Sophie

[Not_Telling]

YES YES YES YES I love guy friendship fics they are the best!

I'll respond more "detailed" later. Kinda busy at the moment, and may be taking a break from the forum for a couple of days, but I'll definitely get back to you

[Sawyer]

I'm the same way!! I am all about very intimate but non-romantic and non-sexual relationships between two boys. Always been that way. I wonder if this fetish plays into it, since I've heard that a lot of SF people will not really be into conventional sex-type stuff, and as a result we see more appeal in nonsexual relationships (since it's less complicated? imo sex stuff only gets in the way... I don't dislike it but it always feels unnecessary to me lol).

However... I have talked to a lot of non-SF people about this too and it seems to be a common thing. I wonder why!

[Nola]

I too share similar feelings and also don't know why! Even if the fetish is not involved somehow, I still love stories, movies, etc. where two guys (brothers/friends) show some sort of concern, acknowledgement etc. for the other. I always assumed it was because I grew up surrounded by brothers, but I don't know...

[ImTHATweird]

I love it too <3 Brotherly love and male friendship is so cute and sweet. It's definitely not a fetish for me, just something sweet. But it could be since I'm very particular about on screen love story's (On of the only ones I like is Kermit the frog and Ms. Piggy) It's simpler with friendship. Still, if they are on screen they MUST have good chemistry. Any kind of relationship on screen is KILLED if there is not enough Chemistry. Sorry to go off topic, but I felt I had to say that.

[AmeliePoulain]

I agree that this can be really fun

From what I've read about fanfic communities, it's definitely a widespread phenomenon outside of SFF. The official term is "slash fiction," as in Dean/(slash)Sam from Supernatural or Sherlock/Watson from Sherlock. There's a wikipedia entry for "slash fiction," and I just found this well-written blog post with some interesting commentary on slash: http://the-toast.net/2013/09/19/brief-history-slash/

I'm a hurt/comfort enthusiast, and I feel like part of the reason why it's attractive to me when male characters have an intimate (platonic?) relationship and express concern for each other's well-being is that those expressions of tenderness are in no way prescribed by cultural norms. Society says that men are not "supposed to" feel concerned or empathetic, especially not for other men. So when they transcend those cultural boundaries, it signals that their feelings of tenderness and concern for the other person are genuine- and so urgent or overpowering that more trivial concerns, including traditional gender roles, fall by the wayside.

[Bisc]

oh yeah! the double male friendship senario is beautiful! or friendship in general! i totally get you on this one xD

i would also like to parrot what Amelie said, becuase it is correct ^0^

[Kuchafya613]

I think it might have to do with love types (which is a thread that I started...somewhere...I think it's in Off-Topic, called "Your Style of Love"). Maybe it's related to a certain type of storge love?

[GenieBenie]

For me, it's just cute, but on TV I do prefer male and male friendships to relationships. Also, I really like guys worrying about each other, (Is that cruel?) even if it has nothing to do with a cold.

[shingetsu]

I completely understand where you're coming from. For me, it's not exactly a fetish, per se, at least not in the way sneezing is. It's just something I really enjoy seeing in fiction and sometimes even in real life. Best friends or brothers interacting even a little makes me feel all warm and tingly inside, to the point where I actively seek out tv shows and anime that have a mostly male cast, or have stories about friendship or brotherhood just to see them interact, even without the caretaking part! But if there is a part where one person is tired/sick/hurt and the other is concerned/helpful it makes it all the better!

I'm a hurt/comfort enthusiast, and I feel like part of the reason why it's attractive to me when male characters have an intimate (platonic?) relationship and express concern for each other's well-being is that those expressions of tenderness are in no way prescribed by cultural norms. Society says that men are not "supposed to" feel concerned or empathetic, especially not for other men. So when they transcend those cultural boundaries, it signals that their feelings of tenderness and concern for the other person are genuine- and so urgent or overpowering that more trivial concerns, including traditional gender roles, fall by the wayside.

^^I agree! I couldn't have put it better myself. Although it doesn't always have to be slash, I actually prefer if it's just a form of really strong and intense friendship rather than romance, but slash works as well.

[Luisa39]

I love the idea of guys being best friends and caring for each other!  Too often in our culture we scoff at friendships between two men, but we really shouldn't, IMO.  I'm a big fan of the old Sherlock Holmes series -- the one with Jeremy Brett as Holmes -- and my favorite scene in the whole series involves Holmes and Watson (David Burke) walking down a street with their arms linked in a friendly sort of way (apparently, this type of thing was common in the 19th century).  Maybe some of you have seen the episode I'm referring to?  It's called "The Resident Patient."   

[Luisa39]

On 3/18/2014 at 10:10 AM, Sen Beret said:

I'm the same way!! I am all about very intimate but non-romantic and non-sexual relationships between two boys. Always been that way. I wonder if this fetish plays into it, since I've heard that a lot of SF people will not really be into conventional sex-type stuff, and as a result we see more appeal in nonsexual relationships (since it's less complicated? imo sex stuff only gets in the way... I don't dislike it but it always feels unnecessary to me lol).

However... I have talked to a lot of non-SF people about this too and it seems to be a common thing. I wonder why!

 I'm asexual myself, so I can totally understand and relate to this.