Advice?

[hugmebrotha]

Hi I would love to hear some advice from someone who's into "care-taking"...I always loved reading h/c and illness fics when I was younger, but I never thought of it as sexual until recently (when romantic relationships got involved). Has anyone ever had a similar experience? Please let me know

[Guest]

I was in my late teens before I attached a sexual connotation to hurt/comfort scenarios. One of my main hobbies was churning out fanfictions centered around it. The first time I initiated hurt/comfort in reality was when I was in my sophomore year of high school. My girlfriend had come down with a fever when she was spending the night with me, and I couldn't help but dote on her. She then sought to return the favor whenever I had gotten sick in turn, and after that she had taken it upon herself to try and take charge of my health; it was something she had done for loved ones throughout her life since the family she lived with was a retired nurse (not to mention that I was rather sickly during the point in time that she and I were dating). It never escalated to anything more than us looking after one another, though. I did not want to take advantage of someone in a piteous condition only to satiate my desires. I just genuinely wanted her to get better whenever she was unwell. It always tore me up to see her in bad condition.

Anyway, I don't really understand what it is about the concept you need advice with, so I cannot try and give you any. Though, I must admit that there isn't really any advice one can give about it...at least, as far as I know.

[hugmebrotha]

That's adorable <3 I don't know how to exactly phrase this into words, but...Am I just deceiving myself? I never thought about sexually until after I joined the forum....Is it something you should just *know* or need to take time with?

[Guest]

That's adorable <3 I don't know how to exactly phrase this into words, but...Am I just deceiving myself? I never thought about sexually until after I joined the forum....Is it something you should just *know* or need to take time with?

Sometimes you just seem to know that a certain thing makes you tick. However, certain "interests" are developed and/or realized over time. You may initially find something endearing, and because of those feelings you may come to realize that new ones are budding. Just allow yourself the time to mull over your thoughts about the subject, and I'm sure that you will come upon the answers you're looking for.

[PuddinPop]

I have to tell you, I have had a sneezing fetish all my life (obviously not sexual until I was in my mid-late teens) and only recently did I develop a taste for hurt/comfort and illness in general.

From as long as I can remember right up until I joined the forum (when I was 22), I only had an interest in the actual sneezing. It didn't matter what the cause was and whilst I definitely noticed whenever someone was sick or had allergies, etc. I never actually took an active interest in any of those symptoms until I explored my fetish further after finding this place.

I know you don't have a sneezing fetish, hugmebrotha, but I think that people's tastes and interests can develop/evolve/expand at any time during their life. While most people claim to have had the fetish since they could remember, there are also others who discovered it much later on in life, so I definitely think that once you have the tools to explore things and become more knowledgeable, then more refined preferences can develop

Is it something you should just *know* or need to take time with?

I think, personally, that it is something that you need to take your time with. There are still aspects of my fetish that I am exploring and that I don't "know" yet, and I think that's perfectly normal and reasonable. My advice to you would be to explore as many avenues as you can and find the things that you enjoy and make you tick

[hugmebrotha]

Thank you so much for the advice, both of you I think I definitely need to some "explore" some more and figure it out.

[Tangerine]

I can remember creating caretaking scenarios with my stuffed animals at a really young age, but it didn't turn sexual until my teens. As an adult, I'm also still learning new aspects of the fetish that didn't know before. Same advice from me- explore and experiment and find what feels good!