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alice in sneezeland reuploaded


47Bears

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(Alice in sneezeland, the 40 billionth version also, surprise, surprise, most of the characters are genderbent because originality, and I can't write guys for shit. Also also, I'm gonna be skipping some things, because reasons. Also, expect a lot of gigantic sneezes, cause I’m finally on a laptop when i write these)

 

As the title implies, we’re going to be following the events of a girl named Alice. A young woman of 18 who studies under her mother. Due to Alice having an overprotective mother who was obsessed with proper etiquette, and deeming that everyone other than Alice was beneath her, Alice never made any friends or developed many social skills, and acted much like a child, preferring to brush off her studies to satisfy her boredom or curiosity. Despite Alice’s mother being a world renowned sneezer with a nose that most women would kill for, and Alice herself being quite gifted when it comes to her nose and sneezing, Alice never truly enjoyed it, even after her nasal growth spurt, which only occurred less than a month ago. Still, her mother pushes her to be the world’s greatest sneezer, even becoming her sneeze teacher, along with being a sneeze tutor along with being a professional sneeze model, as well as sneezing competitively. Which is what she wants for her daughter, but no dice, at least not yet.

 

Alice was resting under a tree, slowly bringing a flower underneath her large nose, taking sniffs of it to savor the scent, however, the pollen that she was oh so allergic to made its way into her giant nostrils as well, “eeehh heeeeehhh HAATCHOOOH, oh, this blasted nose, so big and sensitive, it’s like I can't take one sniff without my giant nose making me sneeze my head off” she whined, before going back to sniffing the flower.

 

After another sneeze, the girl turned and saw a rabbit, nothing out of the ordinary. Then she saw that the rabbit was carrying a watch, had a skirt (how would that even work) and a much larger than average nose for a rabbit. The rabbit then sniffed some powder and sneezes herself, then looked at her watch and began to panic. “Oh my, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late” she yelled before running off.

 

Alice, being the curious girl that she is, decided to follow the rabbit to see where she was going. “Ooooh nonononono AAHCHOOH, I'm overdue, I'm coming through, no time to say goodbye HAAAATCHEW, I'm late I'm late I'm late” the rabbit hopped across the garden, sneezing many times along the way before jumping into a hole with one more, resounding sneeze.

 

Alice looked into the hole and crawled inside. “I wonder what that rabbit could possibly be late for, and why she was so sneezy, *sniff* oh, speaking of sneezy, I think the dust in here is going to make me… sneeehh heeeehhh HHAAAAAAAAAAAATCHOOOOOOOOOOH” Alice sneezes much larger than usual and fell into the hole.

 

After a long fall that was filled with more sneezes, Alice reached the bottom, where she saw the rabbit running by, sneezing all the while. Alice chased after the rabbit until she came to a tiny door. She went down to open it, but when she turned the knob, the door sneezed a mighty “HUUUUUHSHOOOH” at her, with the same volume and sound as her mother’s sneeze, which is to say: booming yet feminine.

 

“Guuh…*sniff* goodness, you don't just grab a poor lady’s nose if you want her to sneeze, my dear” the door said, in a voice that sounded like Alice's, except 40 years older. “Oh, I'm dreadfully sorry, I just didn't notice that you were, well, sentient” Alice apologized.

“Oh, that's quite alright, I can see you're not from here, and that rust had been giving my monster of a nose a good tickling for quite some time now, I've been simply dying for a good sneeze, so I suppose I have that to thank you for, dear” the doorknob said back.

 

“You didn't happen to notice a sneezy rabbit come through here, have you” Alice asked. “Oh, but I did, gave my big old honker a good tickling, she did. Thank heavens that tickle is finally alleviated, mostly” the doorknob responded, with the nob rocking back and forth like a twitching nose.

“Oh, so you have, would you mind if I could pass through so that I can see where she’s going”

“Of course you can, you bettered that nagging tickle in my giant sniffer, but you're much too large to pass, if you could only find a way to get smaller, like say…using the powder on the table” the door said.

“What table” Alice said before she turned to see a glass table with a bottle on it. “Oh, that table” she remarked before going to pick up the bottle.

 

All that it was was a bottle with green powder and a label that said “sniff me”

“You have to get it all into your nose in one snort, but with a sneezer as huge as yours, I'm sure you’ll get it all in those big op’ nostrils in one sniff, no problem” the door remarked. This prompted Alice to go cross eyed and acknowledge that her nose was much, much larger than most girls she knew, or most people she knew for that matter. “Okay, I'll try” she said before sniffing up all the contents of the bottle.

 

Alice was greeted with nothing but an incredibly tickly nose. She started to fan it desperately as the tickle grew, not wanting to embarrass herself with her trademark monstrous sneeze. However, Alice never could stifle, and the tickle was too great to resist. “Eeehhh heeeeeehhh HAAAAAAATCHOOOOOHH” after the first sneeze, she felt herself get a little smaller, then another sneeze escaped her nose and she shrank once again.

 

After a large volley of sneezes, the girl found herself to be the size of the door. She went to open the door, but it didn't open. “Why can't you open” Alice asked, growing more impatient by the minute.

“You see sweetie, I've got another sneeze stuck in this monster of a schnoz I've got, and I'd definitely open for you, if you can get it out” the door responded.

 

“And how would I do that” the impatient girl asked. “By twisting my nose, of course, I am a door to the kingdom of sneeze after all, just give it a twist or two if you would” the door said.

 

Alice obliged, slowly twisting the knob in both directions. “Eeehh heeeeehhh HEEEEEHTCHEEEEEWWW HEEEETCHEEEEEWW HAAAAAATCHEEEEWW” the door sneezes three times before she allowed Alice to enter.

 

Once she went inside, Alice found herself in a dense forest, and the door she came from was nowhere to be seen. “Oh dear, this whole day is becoming stranger and stranger, and my nose is becoming itchier and itchier” she said before giving her huge, pink nose a fierce rub.

 

After walking for a short while, she stumbled across a house. The girl cautiously approached the house, but was surprised to see the sneezy rabbit. “HAAHCHUUHH oh… Oh, Mary Ann, is that you Mary Ann?” The rabbit called.

“Umm, no, my name is…” Alice began.

“Oh, hush now Mary Ann, now go upstairs and get my tissues aaahh haaahh HAAAAHCHUUUH… and my sneeze powder, go, gogogogogogogogo before I sneeze my poor nose off” The rabbit pushed Alice along, the poor girl was more confused than anything else.

 

When Alice got to the rabbit’s room, she saw a pile of hankies, which she grabbed a few from, and another bottle that said ’sniff me’ which Alice brought up to her nose and after a “don't mind if I do” she sniffed up everything in the bottle in one fell sniff. After all the sneezing she’d done today, she was beginning to enjoy it, knowing that sneezes would come after sniffing up all that powder.

 

This time, because nobody was around, Alice didn't try to stifle or suppress the sneeze in the slightest, but instead just decided to let it all out. “HEEEH HAAAHH HAAAAAATCHOOOOOHH” however, after her sneeze, Alice felt herself double in size, but her nose, which was already disproportionately large, increased its size by four times with each sneeze

 

Soon, Alice began to become too large for the small room, and as the rabbit came up the stairs, Alice’s foot pushed through the door and forced the rabbit out of the house, the frightened creature screaming “HEELP, MOONSTER” with quite a few sneezes sprinkled in all the while.

 

By the time Alice stopped growing, her arms and legs were poking from the windows and doors, and her nose was ten times larger than it should've been. “Oh my, just look at how big my nose is, why, I bet a family could live in it. Oh dear, if I were to sneeze now…” she trailed off as a smile slowly stretched across her face, she knew that if anything got into her nose now, the result would be catastrophic, and she was waiting in anticipation for one unlucky person to grant her wish.

 

Just then, a Lizard with a ladder was passing by, and the rabbit stopped him. “Bill, oh bill, I need your services please” the rabbit said, followed by a sneeze.

“Oi, I'll take care of it, but what's the problem ma’am?” Bill asked.

“Well, there's a monster in my house and I need you to get it out”

“Ah, no problem, I'll just… wait, did you say ‘monster?’”

“Why yeeh YEEHCHOOH… yes I did, now go on, hop to it bill”

“I-I-I-I can't fight a m-m-monster” bill stammered, wanting to back out.

 

“Actually bill, you don't have to fight me, just find something to make me small, them come through the chimney, I promise I won't hurt you” Alice called.

“Ooh, well alright then” Bill called. He grabbed a flower and went uptake ladder until he reached the chimney, which he jumped into.

 

The jump resulted in a large amount of soot flying from the fireplace and right into Alice’s nostrils. Alice gleefully sniffed up the cloud of soot, and almost immediately, a tickle started to form. Alice’s nostrils began to quiver, her nose scrunched and twitched, and her breath hitched. “Heehh heeeehh haaaahhh aaaaaaaahh HAAAAAAAAHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH” Alice sneezed hugely, sending all of the soot and bill flying from the chimney.

 

Then, when she poked her nose out the window, the flower bill was holding fluttered down and got sucked into her nostril, resulting in more gigantic sneezes, however, she girl shrinked with each one, and before long, she was tiny, except for her nose, which was twice as big as it should be, but with Alice’s newfound love for sneezing forming, she wasn't complaining in the slightest, in fact, she loved her nose’s size now.

 

As Alice left the rabbit’s house, she heard sneezing coming from the forest ahead and went to check it out. Soon, she found herself in a garden, where flowers towered over her, with pollen and nectar trickling from each of their centers. Alice was on guard, but her now titanic nose was beginning to itch again, with the girl attempting to rub the itch away, but her nose was simply too large for her hands to manage. It was then that she realized that her nose was now bigger than her mother’s, maybe now she could appreciate those sneezing lessons she tried to give Alice.

 

Her train of thought was interrupted by a fierce “HAAATCHOOOOOOH” from behind her followed by several more sneezes from all around her. Then a large purple flower sneezed thunderously, before proclaiming “I win ladies” and giving a hearty laugh. “Looks like everything here has a case of the sneezes” Alice said to herself before being spotted by a rose, the flower then bent over by the stem to look at Alice. The rose’s center had a face, with said face having a large, bulbous nose that was leaking pollen and nectar. “Oh my, it looks like we have a visitor ladies” she announced, followed by a few wet sniffs. The rest of the flowers turned to look at Alice, with each of them saying different things, “we never get humans” “I wonder if she’ll try our game” “just look at the size of that nose” are a few of the remarks she heard. The robust purple flower looked down to see Aice, which gave the girl a view of the flower’s absolutely monstrous nose. The nose was something you’d see in a cartoon, it seemed way too big for her face, but the flower’s large stature and features made it work. As the flower examined Alice, some of her pollen was sprinkled into Alice’s hair without either of them noticing, then the flower went to sniff Alice, but the flower’s nasal strength sucked alice right up her left nostril, with her lower waist and legs dangling out. “Oh, oh...I’m gonna... haaaahh aaaaaahhh HAAAAAAAHH” the flower tilted herself back, with the flowers in front of her ducking, with one yelling “SHE’S GONNA BLOW”

 

“HAAAAAAAAAHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAATCHOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH Alice was rocketed out of the flower’s nostril into the rose’s pollen pocket. Alice was covered in nectar from the purple flower’s nose, so the pollen stuck to her whole body, with a lot of it going right up her nose causing Alice herself to prepare a sneeze or two “heeeehh eeeeeehhhh haaaaahhh HAAAAAAHH AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH” Alice’s nostrils flared to three times their previous size, with her chest expanding for the oncoming explosion, “HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEHSHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH” Alice’s sneeze shot pollen all over the garden, with each flower bursting into sneezy hysterics.

 

Confused, Alice asked the purple flower why all of them were sneezing. “Don’t you know anything, you weed, flowers are dreadfully allergic to pollen, just watch” she then shook her petals and a large quantity of pollen flew in the air with the flower flaring her nostrils and sucking all of it in with one breath before her face became a perfect example of pre sneeze torture “haaaaahh aaaaaah AAAAAAAHHHH HHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHTCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHthe flower sneezed a sneeze that was just a bit smaller than Alice’s, while shooting a glob of nectar next to the girl.

 

Then, Alice saw something she never thought she would see, the purple flower’s nose started to grow, “oh my, did I fill my preposterously large nose again, well then, larger it gets, I suppose” the flower’s nose nearly doubled in size before stopping. “What just happened to your nose” Alice said, before noticing that her own nose felt a bit funny, and not in a sneezy way. “Well, you see, my pollen is magical, whenever a nose gets filled with my pollen, it grows to match the sneezy lust of it’s owner, and judging by how yours is growing, I can see that you’ve quite the lust” the flower remarked. Then Alice realized that her nose nearly tripled in size. The girl was dumbfounded, but soon gathered her bearings and began poking and playing with the giant mountain of flesh on her face. “Now, if you’re quite finished, I’d like to play a game with you” the purple flower said.

 

“Oh, excuse my manners, what kind of game do you have in mind” Alice asked.

“A sneeze contest” the flower said. Alice was excited to try her new nose, so she accepted the challenge. “The one with the bigger sneeze wins” the flower said before leaning over and letting her pollen spill in front of Alice, then sniffing up all of her leftover pollen. “Haaaaaah aaaaaaaaaahh HAAAAAAAAAHHH AAAAAAAAAAHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHTCCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHher sneeze was much bigger than before, as alice fell on her rear from the winds, followed by the flower’s nose growing once again.

 

Alice then took a sniff, her nose tickling immediately, but something was wrong. “Heeeeeh eeeeeeehhhh HAAAAAAAHHH AAAAAAAH” as her breath hitched, her nose grew larger, and larger, but still felt weightless. Alice’s breath continued to hitch, her nose continued to grow larger and larger. Soon, her nostrils were covering some of the flowers, yet her nose still weighed the same, her powerful breaths sucking in all the pollen in the garden before “HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHTCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHAlice nearly sneezed the flowers from their roots, her mucous spraying all across the garden before her nose returned to it’s previous size. Alice looked upon the garden before cupping her hands over mouth in shock, “oh my, I seem to have overdone it haven’t I” she gasped.

 

Then the purple flower started to laugh, “that’s quite the nose you have there, maybe you could beat the sneeze queen in one of our contests” she said.

“Who is the sneeze queen” alice asked, attempting to rub her nose. “The sneeze queen is the woman with the largest nose in history, the winds and thunder are her sneezes, the rain is her runny nose, she rules this land with an iron nose, but, legends say that a girl is to come to out-sneeze the queen, and that girl is you, weed. But while venturing to the castle of sneezes, be warned, the knights of the nose will attempt to stop you, try finding the sneezerpillar near here, she can grant you the sneezy power you need to dethrone the sneeze queen.”

“Right then, I’ll be off, thank you” Alice called as she left the garden, looking for the sneezerpillar.

 
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Great job as always! Would be interesting to know how it will continue.

Nevertheless, the story with the fairy has become my favourite one. There is something about puberty changes...

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  • 2 weeks later...

 

She heard the sound of a sneeze in the distance and weird coloured clouds spelling “HATCHOO” in the sky above her. She followed her nose to find a caterpillar with a giant bucket of a weird powder that she was sniffing through her rapidly expanding nostrils before sneezing her automotopias into the air.  “Umm, excuse me, but you wouldn't happen to be the sneezerpillar, would you” Alice asked sheepishly.


The caterpillar stopped sneezing for a moment, her nostrils returning to normal size before turning to face the girl “I am, but who are you” she said, blowing multicolored smoke into Alice’s face, causing her nose to tickle “I’m… aaaahhhh haaaaaahh AAAAAAAAAHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYEEEEEEEEEEWW” she let loose a huge sneeze, but her nose didn’t grow this time “oh, excuse me, my name is Alice, and I was told to come see you from the garden flowers”


The caterpillar was shaken by the sneeze, but remained calm. “Aaah, so you’re the one to dethrone the sneeze queen, but tell me, are you a professional sneezer” the bug asked. “Well...no, I’m not, I’ve just recently acquired a love for sneezing, and as you can see, my nose agrees with that love” alice said, flaring her nostrils proudly.
“Yes, your nose is quite large, but you must know how to hone its strength before you can challenge the queen, she can sneeze on command, can you?”   


“well... no, I can’t” Alice said in a defeated tone.
“Well, what kind of a legendary sneezer are you if you can’t sneeze on command then?” the sneezerpillar said, sticking her nose in the air.
“Well, I’m a much stronger sneezer with a much bigger nose than you” Alice said. 
“Oh really, would you like to test that theory then, little girl” the bug said, pressing her own nose against Alice’s.
“As a matter of fact, I would. If I prove that I have a bigger nose and bigger sneezes, then you'll show me the way”
“And if I win, I won't, and you’ll be my sneezy servant forever” 
“Deal” Alice said, not exactly opposed to being a sneeze for the rest of her life.


The bug brought out two jars of her sneezing powder from her seemingly endless supply and handed one to Alice. The bug opened the jar and sniffed up everything inside, powder lightly leaked from the bug’s nostrils. “Haaaahhhh haaaaaaaaaaahhh AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAHHHHH” her nose twitched wildly, nostrils flaring sporadically, then “AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHTCHOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH” the bug sneezes just as strong as the purple flower, which swept Alice clean off her feet.


The bug’s nose was dripping as she continued to wiggle it from side to side “so, how was that, I hope your nose is ready for this powder, it's the same our queen uses for her inducement” 
“Well alright then, if you insist” Alice said before sniffing up the entire jar of powder in one sniff. 


The same thing that happened before was happening again, Alice’s nose grew as her breath hitched. It got big enough to suck up all the sneeze powder that the bug had behind her, and even the sneezerpillar herself, who was ten times Alice’s size.


“HAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHCHYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW” Alice sneezed a sneeze that blew through the entire field, the bug flew right out of Alice’s nose, covered in snot.


Soon, Alice’s nose returned to normal, and the bug got to her feet. “Well, I concede defeat. I'll show you the way, but you'll need some supplies, take this bell, if you ring it and call out a number, I'll send you that many of my sneeze powder jars, and this mushroom, one side will make you grow taller, and the other will make you grow shorter. But be warned, your nose will grow at ten times the rate of your body, and this mushroom is veeery potent, I don't know what other effects it might have if you eat too much. Take a tiny nibble and you'll be able to see the castle” the bug said as she gave Alice a green bell and a white mushroom. 


“Okay then, let's see how strong this is” Alice said as she took a medium sized bite of the mushroom, which regenerated instantly. “Oooh no, that might've been too much” the bug said, backing away.
“What, I don't feel any different, though, my nose is a bit tingly, and I'm a bit li…” her sentence was cut short by an alarming increase in size which only took a few seconds, and suddenly, she's as large as the trees, standing 50 feet tall, with her nose being a whopping 30 feet long and wide while still feeling like normal.


Alice took a small breath through her nose, and the trees began to sway towards her, leaves flying off the branches and entering her cave like nostrils. Then, as a small, mischievous smile crept across her face, she took a huge sniff, sucking trees, flowers, and even small animals into her nose. “HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH” despite Alice’s nose being already too big for her body, it continued to grow, and to suck up more trees, plants, etc. by the time she reached the climax of her sneeze, her nose was the size of a football field. Then “HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHTCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” Alice sneezes the biggest sneeze of her life. The entire forest around her was flattened and covered in snot. “Oh my, I think I overdid it again” she said before taking a bite of the other side of the mushroom before returning to her normal height of 5’6 and her nose being 3’6, the organ still not weighing an ounce, but it bounced as she walked down the trail to the castle. 


Soon, Alice began to hear a laugh, another feminine laugh, but this wasn't menacing, this one was...mischievous. Then, Alice felt a tremendous tickle in her nose before realizing that she had a giant green-grey moustache that was tickling her nose with the tip. “HAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAHTCHOOOOOOOHHH HAAAAAAAAATCHYEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWW” Alice sneezed a colossal triple before the laugh revealed itself from in a tree. A green-grey cat was sitting on a branch, “so, my dear, how's your sneezing?” It asked.
“A...a cat? Oh my, cats are my worst allergy by far, one sniff and I'll sneeze up a storm” Alice said, her nose too massive to rub, but she tried anyway, while on the outside she looked like she was resenting her situation, on the inside she wanted more of it than anything else.


“Ooooh, well I guess you shouldn't have told me then, see, I'm a cat who gets his kicks from seeing folks like you sneeze their noses clean off. But you can't lie to me, I know you love this stuff, why else would you make your nose that big in the first place?” The cat responded coyly, an ever present smile on his face. 


He then disappeared, and as Alice blinked, he appeared, resting on top of her nose, his fluffy tail dangling off the side and tickling her nostril. “Ooh, yuuh, you're tiiihh tickling me…I'm gonnaaahh haaaahhh AAAAAAAHHHH HAAAAAAAAHH” Alice’s head tipped back as her nostrils flared. As they did, the Cheshire Cat said “well, since you're giving me this wonderful opportunity” before fidgeting into Alice’s left nostril, his tail swiping at the nasal walls like a feather duster.


Alice’s nose tickled more than ever before, her nose twitches wildly, the large mass of flesh even seemed to bounce as her breath hitched. Alice’s nose started to grow once again, which intrigued the cat, so he began tickling her nose more and more. Alice’s nose continued to grow and grow as her breath hitched more and more. “HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH” Alice sneezes enormously again, but instead of the tickle backing off after one sneeze, each release made the tickle worse and worse. Alice went on a sneezing spree for what felt like days, despite only being a few hours. 


As the girl recovered and the cat left her nose, the two bursted out laughing. “Oh, Cheshire, that was fun, thank you ever so much, any time you wish to tickle my nose, go right on ahead, any time” Alice said, snot covering her body.


“Oh, it was no trouble dear, but I must be going now, ta ta” he said as he vanished once again, prompting Alice to go on her way once again.


While Alice walked, she was struck with extreme fatigue, so she found a nice area in the grass and fell asleep. Meanwhile, a few royal guards were passing by and saw Alice. “Hey” one said to the other” look at that girl over there, do you think that's who Veronica was talking about” 


“It might be, but what're we gonna do though?” The other one said. "We'll figure something out, now think"

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

I've decided that before I just up and leave, I want to finish this one fic. This was the one I was looking foreword to finishing the most, so I think it's only fitting that I finish my time here with what I believe is my best work to date across every forum I've posted on. It will take some time, but I want to do this so badly, so I guess I'll see you guys when this is done

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Wow, sounds pretty amazing! This one is one of my favorite of yours, so i'm really excited to see what you come up with next :)

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  • 3 months later...

I hope that you continue this soon. I wonder though if there is going to be some kind of plot twist where it turns out that Alice is the Queen's biological daughter who somehow ended up on Earth and has to be identified by some kind of Royal sneeze test?

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  • 2 years later...
14 hours ago, Heathcliff said:

I wrote this before you did 🙂

Okay, neat. I really appreciate you finding something I wrote years ago (that I honestly want to delete because the writing is awful, but I don’t know how) just to say you did it first. How very necessary 

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My apologies. I'm frequently a dick on this forum. I was, in all honesty, just fascinated that someone had the same idea.

If I offended you I'm sorry.

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19 hours ago, Yamiterasu said:

Okay, neat. I really appreciate you finding something I wrote years ago (that I honestly want to delete because the writing is awful, but I don’t know how) just to say you did it first. How very necessary 

You even went out of your way to remark that it was the "billionth reboot" of the story/theme lol so I get the frustration.

But please DONT delete it.  I happen to very much enjoy your work.  😃

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On 8/17/2019 at 7:57 PM, Yamiterasu said:

Okay, neat. I really appreciate you finding something I wrote years ago (that I honestly want to delete because the writing is awful, but I don’t know how) just to say you did it first. How very necessary 

I'm surprised that you think that the writing is awful. I've had no problem with your writing whatsoever. Your work is clear and easy to read unlike some fanfics where people can't even spell the main characters name right and the writing is illegible due to either using wrong words entirely or uses such a small font that you can't see what is written. This is my absolute favorite of your stories and it was a shame that it was never finished.

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Well damn, I didn’t actually know people still liked this story. I have something of an idea for a final part to it. But I’m 100% open to suggestions, seeing as I’m not really proud of anything I’ve done anymore. If you or anyone else has something fantastical you’d like to see, I could *try* giving it one more shot. Maybe then I’ll get whatever spark I had back.

10 hours ago, SneezeloveronGirls said:

I'm surprised that you think that the writing is awful. I've had no problem with your writing whatsoever. Your work is clear and easy to read unlike some fanfics where people can't even spell the main characters name right and the writing is illegible due to either using wrong words entirely or uses such a small font that you can't see what is written. This is my absolute favorite of your stories and it was a shame that it was never finished.

 

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You could have Alice be the Sneeze Queen's actual daughter who went missing or Alice be the rightful ruler. You could have her have the Royal Nose and Royal Nostrils shape-wise and have to place her nose into something to see if it would fit and when it proves to be the rightful match have it inject special pollen into her nose that converts all of her nose hairs to flowers and have the pollen greatly enhance her lungs power with every sneeze causing hurricane force winds to be unleashed. These are all potential ideas that you can use.

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9 hours ago, SneezeloveronGirls said:

You could have Alice be the Sneeze Queen's actual daughter who went missing or Alice be the rightful ruler. You could have her have the Royal Nose and Royal Nostrils shape-wise and have to place her nose into something to see if it would fit and when it proves to be the rightful match have it inject special pollen into her nose that converts all of her nose hairs to flowers and have the pollen greatly enhance her lungs power with every sneeze causing hurricane force winds to be unleashed. These are all potential ideas that you can use.

I did actually have something written out with the queen’s real daughter and her two bodyguards. I might post that here as a little teaser thing while I work on something else 

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(So this is basically the end of the last part. I wrote this up a few days after I ended the last part but never uploaded it. Have this while I work on another part for this story. I’m really glad people actually like it)

 

The two guards took Alice to a small house near the Castle. As Alice woke up, she saw a girl in front of her who looked a lot like she did, long blonde hair, blue eyes, incredibly oversized nose, with some differences. “Oh good, you're awake” the girl said. Alice doubled back in surprise. “Wh...who’re you?” Alice asked.

 

“You've nothing to be afraid of, I'm princess Veronica, daughter of the mighty sneeze queen, and these are my two guards, pepper and feather” the girl said. The two guards then entered, each having scarlet hair, red armour, noses that were massive in different ways, and one being covered in pepper shakers while the other was covered in feathers. 

 

“The sneeze queen’s daughter? Does she already know about me? What are you going to do to me?” Alice asked a multitude of different questions right off the bat before touching her nose and realizing it was back to normal “And what did you do to my nose?!” She bellowed. 

 

“Alice, please relax, she doesn't know about you yet, I left her to live on my own, I don't like being mean for no reason like my mother, so we moved out here, and you've nothing to fear from me, we just put a spell on your nose, now if you call out how big you want it to be, it will grow to that size, and your sneezes along with your sensitivity will increase as well. And don't worry about it being too large for your face, your body will grow to accommodate, however your nose will grow disproportionately. That's out of the way now, the reason I brought you here is because I really just want another friend, feather and pepper are amazing, but we get lonely”

 

“A...friend?” Alice asked, bewildered by the unorthodox request. “I don't have many friends myself, so it would be nice to have someone else with me, I'll do it” Alice proclaimed. “Capital, we shall start the sneezing immediately” Veronica said gleefully. “More sneezing? Well, I guess it couldn't hurt” Alice said.

 

“Pepper, Feather, please come here” The princess said as the two guards approached. “What is your command m’lady” they said in unison. 

“I want each of you to get acquainted with our new friend, I want each of you to get at least ten sneezes from her, and let her get ten sneezes from you. Understood?” She commanded. 

“Yes ma'am”

 

Pepper approached Alice and leaned in, her long, wide nose a bright red, “greetings Alice, I am Pepper, loyal sneeze knight of princess Veronica, the only thing that makes me sneeze is the black spice. Now, would you want to go first?” The knight said, her triangular nose scrunching at the mention of the spice. 

“Please miss Pepper, I’m all yours” Alice said, sticking her nose so it rubbed against the guard’s. 

 

The guard removed a pepper shaker from her armor and held it beneath Alice’s quivering nostrils. The girl sniffed the pepper graciously, the whole shaker fitting in her nostril with room to spare “haaahhh aaaaaaaahhh HAAAAHHH HAAATCHOOHH, HEETCHOOOHH HAAATCHEEHH HEETCHOOOHH” her sneezes were quite small by her standard, but the fit continued for ten sneezes.

 

The guard then handed Alice the shaker, “okay miss Alice, do as you wish” Pepper said as Alice brought the shaker to her triangular nostrils. Alice shook the shaker, and the pepper flew up into the guard’s nostrils. Immediately, her nose turned a bright shade of red, her nostrils flared hugely, and her nose ran profusely, like her nose was being assisted by the strongest spice known to man. 

 

She sniffled rapidly, trying to fend off the tickle, but her sniffs only brought in more pepper to torture her nose. “Geeehhh heeeehhhh haaaahhhh” her buildup began, the pepper in the shakers on her armor began to flood into her nose, filling it to the point where you couldn't even see inside of it anymore. “GAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH YAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOHHHHH HAAAATCHYOOOOOOOHHH HEEEEEHSHOOOOOOOOHHHpepper’s sneezes were enormous, nearly blowing Alice away, but the pepper managed to stay in her nose for her ten sneezes before a cloud escaped her nostrils, then the cloud was sucked up by Alice, prompting ten more sneezes from the girl. “Thank you Pepper, your sneezes were wonderful” Alice said. “The pleasure is mine miss Alice, if you wish to make me sneeze again, you need only ask” she said before Feather sat on the bed.

 

“Hello miss Alice, I am Feather, one of Lady Veronica’s royal sneeze guards, the only instrument that can tickle my nose are the dusty plumes, a pleasure to make your acquaintance” she said, not a twinge to be seen in her large, wide, bulbous nose. “Would you like me to go first, your nose looks like it could use a rest” the guard said. “Oh, it's alright, please Miss Feather, use those feathers to give my nose some...conditioning” Alice said, admiring the shape of Feather’s nose. “As you wish” she said, pulling a feather from her armour and bringing it to Alice’s oversized, squishy nose.

 

She tickled Alice’s nose expertly, finding all the spots on the outside and inside that were the most sensitive. “Geeehhhh haaahhh HAAAAHHH HAAAAAAAHHH GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH HAAAATCHYOOOOOOHHHHEEETCHYOOOOOOOHHHH HAAAAAAASHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHAlice bursted into a sneezing fit almost immediately, her nose turning a brighter shade of red than she ever thought possible. Mucous poured from her nostrils and got all over her clothing. Her ten sneezes were much stronger than Pepper’s due to the dusty feathers being one of her worst allergies. 

 

Feather cleaned herself off before saying “m’lady, would you care for a change of clothing?” 

“Oh, that's quite alright, it'll dry off soon” Alice said. “Of course, but I must warn you, my nose is much more ticklish than my sisters, and my sneezes much larger” Feather said, her gigantic, squishy nose giving a sharp twitch at the sound of the word ‘sneeze’. 

 

“Oh, well I'd be happy to test that” Alice said, plucking a feather from her armor and bringing it to Feather’s nose. The guard’s nose turned a bright pink, it started to run, and she started to sniffle and snort. “Geeehhh heeehhhh” her breath hitched, and as it did, the feathers around her armor flew up and danced around her bulbous nose, each one tickling the most sensitive spots imaginable while Alice continued to tickle the guard herself. 

 

“GAAAAAAAAHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH GAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH HAAAAATCHOOOOHHH HEEEHHSHOOOOOHHH HAAAHSHOOOOOOHHHHFeather was right about her sneezes being stronger than her sister’s. they were massive, even larger than Alice’s in her nose’s base state.

 

Feather rubbed her giant nose with her arm “thank you miss Alice, if you wish to have your way with my nose again, you're more than welcome to anytime” she said, blowing her nose and winking. Then Veronica pressed her nose to Alice’s. “so, how do you like them?” She asked.

 

“Oh, they're just lovely” Alice said, the repeated tickling taking a toll on her nose. “So Alice, question for you.” Veronica said. 

“Ask away” 

“Do you want to see me sneeze now?” She asked with pepper’s head turning in surprise and Alice picking up on it. “Oh, well, maybe when we set out on our journey to dethrone the queen. I'd imagine your nose is quite sensitive” Alice said.

“Oh, of course, sorry about that, love” Veronica said, with the guard giving a sigh of relief. “Alright, let's go then, Pepper and Feather will take care of us, however, knowing our noses, we’ll sneeze no less than a thousand times before we get there” she said. “Oh, isn't that just wonderful?” Alice said.

“It truly is, now, let's get going” 

“Right”

 

The four set out for the sneeze queen’s palace. Along the way, they heard a loud sneeze that seemed to frighten the birds away. The guards were in front, armed with lances to fight off whatever oncoming threat that they might face. On the horizon, they saw a large brown dog with a gigantic nose that was covered in yellow dust.

 

The dog was sniffing the dirt road, its nostrils flaring wider than they logically should, before contracting once again. With each breath the dog took, a small yellow cloud was shot from its nose before being inhaled once again. “What is that?” Alice asked. 

“I believe they call it a sneezehound.” Veronica said back. The four observed, with Veronica giving a few wet sniffles and giggling in delight as a tickle formed in her nose. 

 

Suddenly, the hound stopped walking, it's head shot up, and it went cross eyed, it's nose began to twitch without the dog’s input, and red was clearly visible among the yellow. The dog sniffled and snorted, “oh, here we go agaaaahhh haaaahhh HAAAAAAHHH GAAAAAAHHHH” the dog sounded feminine, her breath hitching loudly as her nostrils grew to the size of soda cans and continued to expand. “HAAAAAHHH NYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HEEEYAAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW” 

The dog exploded with a gigantic, wet sneeze, which sent her sliding backwards and covered a nearby tree with mucus. She then rubbed her enormous nose furiously before going back to sniffing. “I swear, all i need is to find that girl, but where is she, hope I haven’t sneezed her to the moon yet” she said to herself with a thick british accent. The group approached the dog, with her nose bumping into Alice’s foot. She recoiled after the impact, sniffling and wrinkling her nose, “oi, why don’t you…. Oh, oh my, you wouldn’t happen to be, Alice, would you?” the dog said in anger, then shock and surprise. “Why, yes, I am Alice” Alice said to the dog.

 

“Oh lord, I’ve found her, my master, the one to lead me to the palace, oooh happy day, happy daay” the dog cheered, springing to hr hind legs and licking Alice, causing the girl to laugh, but then, both Alice and Veronica felt incredibly sharp tickles run through their giant noses. Alice was so curious to see Veronica sneeze, while Alice let loose a couple of sneezes immediately, Veronica’s nose took a long while to prep for a sneeze.

 

“Miss Alice, I advise you move” Feather said to Alice, rubbing and cleaning Alice’s nose as Pepper tended to Veronica’s nose. Her nostrils quivered and twitched, her nose was a bright pink, and it grew slightly as the sneeze built. Pepper rubbed away the mucous pouring from Veronica’s nose and rubbed it, “please miss, try to hold it back” she pleaded. “I caaahhhh…haaahhh…can't. I've haaaahhh HAAAAAHHHH…*sniiff* had to sneeeehhh...sneeze all day” Veronica said. 

“I understand, but what about miss Alice one of your sneezes could ruin her quest, please try to hold it back” 

“I caaahhh HAAAAAHHHH HAAAAAAAAAHHH GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH” Pepper desperately rubbed Veronica’s growing nose as the sneeze grew more and more.

 

Veronica turned, her nose unbelievably huge, before letting out a giant GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH it was the biggest sneeze Alice had ever seen, the trees in front of the princess were blown hundreds of feet away, the ground was covered with mucous, and even the dirt road was blown away by the hurricane that escaped Veronica.

 

Her nose returned to normal, with the princess rubbing it harshly. “Wow, that one felt great, I've had that one stick in my nose all day” Veronica said. Alice was in shock “my word, how are your sneezes that strong?” She asked in surprise. “Well, my mother is the strongest sneezer in the world. I had to inherit something” 

“Well, that blows my sneezes out of the water” the sniffly dog said. “By the way, I forgot to ask, who are you, and how do you know who I am” Alice asked the dog. “Well, m’name’s Rosie, cause my nose is caked with rose pollen, and when I was but a wee pup, me mum told me that I was to find the hero that'll save us from that damn queen, and lo and behold, ‘ere you are” she said.

 

“Well, if you are tagging along, I must ask you stay away from princess Veronica” Pepper said. “Pepper, lighten up a bit, I’ll be fine if I'm near her, it's just some sneezes” Veronica said, scrubbing her nose. “But...Miss Veronica…”

“I said lighten up Pepper, that's an order. I want you to take it easy for once” Veronica demanded. 

 

“Now, can you show us the way to the palace, Rosie?” Alice asked. “I don't know where it is off the top of my head, but I bet m’nose could get us there, just be warned, I’ll be sneezing up a storm on the way there” the dog said before sniffing her way down the trail, and true to her word, every couple hundred yards, she would stop, have a massive buildup, and sneeze tremendously, with Alice and Veronica following suit nearly every time.

 

The five walked towards the palace before the sounds of snoring became their soundtrack for the rest of the walk, and then they found the source of said snoring: a giant, green dragon guarding the sneeze queen’s enormous palace. It was nearly the size of the castle, with a huge snout and caves for nostrils. “What is that?” Alice asked, staring at the beast. 

“It's mother’s pet dragon, it guards the castle”

“Then how are we supposed to get in?”

“Maybe if I request access, she’ll let me in” Veronica said.

 

“Hey, dragon! Please let us in!” She shouted. The dragon’s eyes slowly opened and raised its head, then, with an uncharacteristically soft, almost soothing voice, she said “well, if it isn't princess Veronica and her little posse. I recognize you and your guards, but the other girl is rather new” 

“Yes, well, this is Alice, the one destined to dethrone my mother, now, please let us enter the courtyard to see her” Veronica demanded.

 

“Well, I can't do that without first employing some kind of challenge, wouldn't you agree?” The dragon said with a grin. “I...suppose so” Veronica said, sounding defeated. “Now, if this one can make me sneeze ten times and stay in my nose for the duration of my fit, you will be allowed to pass, if you fail, I'll sneeze you to the moon” the dragon said.

 

“Do you want me to help you out Alice?” Rosie asked, “I don't think that's an option right now, but I do need something to tickle that nose with” Alice said. “The challenge also states that you have to actually get me to sneeze, but I have a curse out on my nose, so there's only one thing in the word that will tickle my nose, and you'll have to find it out, one way or another.” The dragon said, teasing Alice. “Wh...but I…oh dear” Alice said to herself before getting sniffed up into the dragon’s gigantic nostril. 

 

Alice walked around the nose, observing the gigantic, wet cavern, riddled with hair, “my word, you really should clean your nose once in awhile” Alice said. “Well, I suppose you could clean it by making me sneeze then” the dragon said with a chuckle. Alice thought for a bit before an idea popped into her head. 

 

She took out her bell and rang it before yelling “one hundred” and a hundred jars of sneezing materialized out of thin air, none of them having any sort of lid on them. Alice then made her nose grow a hundred times over and sniffed up all the powder in one fell swoop. Her nose burned like a thousand suns, her eyes watered, her nostrils growing more and more as the harsh tickle thrashed its way through her nose. “HAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH...YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHAlice sneezed tremendously, the powder flying all over the dragon’s nose.

 

The dragon sniffled in confusion, her gigantic snout wriggling back and forth. Her eyes widened intensely, and her nostrils expanded tenfold “ooohh...how'd you gueeehhhh heeehhh haaaaaaahh” her breath began to hitch, her nostrils sucking in all manner of objects, bushes, stones, trees. Alice grabbed tightly onto one of the dragon’s plentiful nose hairs. “HEEEEEEEEHHHH NYEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHH” the dragon’s hitching became stronger and stronger as she desperately fought off the impending sneezing fit, though, now that the only thing that cancels out the curse has entered her nose, it's become hundreds of times more sensitive.

 

“GAAAAAAHHHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH RRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCHYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHthe dragon didn't shoot fire, but rivers of mucous that covered everything in front of her.

 

The dragon let loose a gigantic, hurricane sneeze, she would stop for a moment to build up, then release another. Alice was hanging on for dear life, the hair nearly coming loose a few times but through the huge river of snot pouring through the dragon’s nose, she managed to hang on for the ten sneezes, before the dragon’s nose subsided.

 

Alice walked out of the nose a complete mess, completely covered in snot. “Well, I did it, now please stand aside” Alice said. 

“I suppose a deal’s a deal, if you call for Puff the sneezy dragon, I'll help you whenever you need it Alice” the dragon said before stepping aside and letting Alice in to the garden.

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I'd like to see Alice get sucked up Veronica's nose or vice versa.

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Wait! So Dusty Feathers are Alice's worst allergy? What would happen if she grows her nose so big that her nostrils are the size of caves and sucks up numerous flocks of dirty birds?

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  • 4 months later...

I hope that you remember that their is still fans of this story who love your work. I hope that you don't think that people don't like them.

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