Fetishes in "real life" and in fictions?

[Shamaël]

I've been reading things here and there in relation with this post, but I couldn't find a thread about it (sorry if it's already been done). Is there a difference for you between real life and fiction? I mean, of course there is a difference, but do you enjoy things in fiction which make you cringe in reality? I love reading sick fics, I love H/C in general but when someone I know is ill, when it is true, I am very uncomfortable with it. It's not true with sneezing, I like it whether they are "real" or in fics, but with related fetishes I become kind of schizophrenic... Are your fetish(es) linked to a fantasm which needs to remain fictional to be enjoyable, or is it something you like in everyday life?

[htkid1]

Yes, Yes Yes! The things I love when indulging in the fetish would make me feel really awkward if my DH decided suddenly to carry them out. He's not a fellow fetishist though. I wonder if I would feel differently if  he was?

[Kaze Wo Hiku]

Personally I enjoy much more in fiction since it's tailored for us, even if not all your kinks are the same. In writing you can create any scenario you want. Real life it depends mostly on the person. I like h/c in reality if Im close to the person if not then yeah kinda uncomfortable. Basically I have to weigh each experience individually.  

[HornedSerpent]

For me, there's hardly any fiction out there for what I particularly enjoy, so I sort of glom onto anything I can find.  But since telling my guy about it, he's been indulging me and it's beyond amazing.  SO amazing.  I can't even with the things he does.  However, with certain things it's almost so embarassing that I clam up.  But fiction and reality both are fab.

[Elektra]

On 23/11/2016 at 11:42 AM, HornedSerpent said:

But since telling my guy about it, he's been indulging me and it's beyond amazing

Oooooh that's so great, I'm glad for you! * a bit envious*

There's definitely a difference for me, most of what I can enjoy in fiction I'm not entirely sure I would in RL. Sneezes I enjoy in both, and RL the most. The 'not knowing' factor is probably a big part of it.

But it's always been a private thing, and I'm not sure I could enjoy it as freely if the other person knew about it.

Sickness though....now that's a problem. What I would enjoy in fiction is mostly ruined by fear of contagion, and I cringe in RL at things that I get a kick out of in fic. It's too bad btw, I wish there was a way out of this one? Advice welcome;) Germophobia gets in the way of care-taking.

And finally, onto real phobia, there's emeto which is totally fine in fic, even really good from the vulnerability/care taking side, right up with coughing and the rest of it, and in real life I CAN'T STAND IT. Here you go for schizo, I guess;)

 

[Red]

On 1.12.2016 at 11:36 PM, Elektra said:

And finally, onto real phobia, there's emeto which is totally fine in fic, even really good from the vulnerability/care taking side, right up with coughing and the rest of it, and in real life I CAN'T STAND IT. Here you go for schizo, I guess;)

I absolutely know that! It's extreme. In fics I kind of love it but in RL I'm massive emetophobic. I even cringe if someone mentions he/she feels a bit nauseous...  

And in fics I like if the characters are suffering. But of course I don't want to see someone I love suffer. Another point is that I love fics where friends are taking care of each other, especially if they are all male. And I love slash in fictions. That's something that RL won't offer me, I guess 

[Elektra]

On 06/12/2016 at 6:17 PM, Red said:

And I love slash in fictions. That's something that RL won't offer me, I guess

Well I guess that depends on where you go <G>

[Red]

On 9.12.2016 at 11:36 PM, Elektra said:

Well I guess that depends on where you go <G>

 You're right!

But I prefer male/male and as a women I think it's not easy to find two guys who would do that for me 

[Elektra]

I know a friend who knows a friend...

[MyOwnPrivateSFC]

6 hours ago, Elektra said:

I know a friend who knows a friend...

Ditto (though, presumably, different friends!). 

[D-DOG]

For me, real life is always better than fiction

[Elektra]

On 21/12/2016 at 5:20 AM, MyOwnPrivateSFC said:

Ditto (though, presumably, different friends!). 

the opposite could be quite exciting (and troubling too)

[RoyalFlush]

YES! Oh my Goodness.

There is a huge difference for me between real life and fictional illness.

In real life, seeing someone out and about with a fever or sick is uncommon and seeing my family members sick is...disgusting. (I'm only interested in men with symptoms. lel) So I rarely have ever seen all of the symptoms that I love the most.

So a lot of my fetishy attractions began from a fictional point of view. When someone in real life is sick or something, I usually avoid them because I don't want to catch what they have. But in my fantasy or fictional point of view, all of my hang ups about germs are gone. I like to exaggerate symptoms like fever and shivering and coughing and sniffling. (I don't know why I really love sniffling.) All of the real life symptoms become...what's the word...glamorized? I still don't know for sure how effective all of my fetishy attractions will feel when I see them in real life because for the most part I've never had a chance to hang out with a sick man before that wasn't my brother-in-law. (And that was soooooo freaking awkward. Gross.) All of my experiences with men in real life who were sick were at a distance. I never engaged with them and got to see all my fetishy desires up close and personal. Its still a fantasy for me.... But I do know what little I have experienced in real life is....pretty freaking great.

 

[Elektra]

Ah. I thought I would....up to the point where I discovered my partner * whines*.

LOL

What a turn off;)

[Jelloicious]

On 12/11/2016 at 2:19 PM, Red said:

 You're right!

But I prefer male/male and as a women I think it's not easy to find two guys who would do that for me 

OMG, THIS!   hahahaha!

 

[Nval95]

On 02/12/2016 at 5:36 AM, Elektra said:

 

Sickness though....now that's a problem. What I would enjoy in fiction is mostly ruined by fear of contagion, and I cringe in RL at things that I get a kick out of in fic. It's too bad btw, I wish there was a way out of this one? Advice welcome;) Germophobia gets in the way of care-taking.

And finally, onto real phobia, there's emeto which is totally fine in fic, even really good from the vulnerability/care taking side, right up with coughing and the rest of it, and in real life I CAN'T STAND IT. Here you go for schizo, I guess;)

 

Yes!!! I thought i was the only one.. I love how contagion can spread in fiction, but when it comes to RL i will always shy away from them 😂😂

[beijoseternura]

I think everyone thinks something different about it.
Of course you are right, there is always a difference between real life and a 'story or your own imagination' - but in my opinion, it depends on who sneezes.
How do I relate to this person?
If I do not like him or her, in such cases, I can even enjoy topics such as illnesses, allergies in stories more.

 

I've been writing myself for a few years now, but have not yet added any 'sneezing scenes' to my chapters as it gives me a sense of something weird, something I should keep for myself.
Though, in some chapters I have written about my protagonists struggling from cough and shortage of breath, for these passages I actually always take quite a long time to find the right words.
I also like to describe sensory impressions fully detailed.
For example, the smell of something, the taste of a fruit, a kiss.
I think while writing, you can live out your imagination completely, where in real life, sometimes a little limited.