Mixed feelings about the Obs section of SFF

[Yuurei]

Every now and then I'll browse the observation section of SFF (usually I like to look at artwork and writing), and I really feel weird about it, if I'm being honest. While I have no problem with self observations, I get uneasy reading other people's observations of friends or strangers. It feels like projecting your fetish on an unknowing person, and because the subject is usually unaware of the observer's fetish, to me it feels like a non-consensual act. If that makes sense? I hope I'm explaining myself well, it's pretty late where I am lol. Does anyone else feel this way?

[Cutelittlenose]

Yes, I feel the same way.

[Vetinari]

I don't feel that way, mainly because I see a non-consensual act as something physical (or verbal) happening to the subject that causes them distress. 

I suppose sharing the observation is technically an act, for which there was no consent, but as it is very unlikely anyone will recognise that person, it seems harmless to me. And I don't know about anyone else, but any time I've shared a non-self observation, I've made very sure that the subject is unrecognisable, so that in effect, it is fiction, based on something that actually happened.

[murphy dee]

I definitely understand how they can be creepy, and some I've read are VERY creepy, but I think as long as you're not like showing a photograph you took of them in secret or being like "it was the check-out girl with the short red hair at the gas station on 123 Main St. in Phoenix, Arizona" at the end of the day it's not really all that different from me going to a friend and being like "ohhh girl this cute blue-eyed dude at the library, you should've seen how tight his pants were."

I mean yeah there are some obvs that are written specifically to try and arouse the reader instead of just being like "here's this super hot thing that happened to me", and those do run really creepy just imo if they're not a self-ob. Like, I feel like those obvs should've just been reworked into an original story or something. But that's just me.

[blowlovinaspiegurl]

4 hours ago, murphy dee said:

I definitely understand how they can be creepy, and some I've read are VERY creepy, but I think as long as you're not like showing a photograph you took of them in secret or being like "it was the check-out girl with the short red hair at the gas station on 123 Main St. in Phoenix, Arizona" at the end of the day it's not really all that different from me going to a friend and being like "ohhh girl this cute blue-eyed dude at the library, you should've seen how tight his pants were."

I mean yeah there are some obvs that are written specifically to try and arouse the reader instead of just being like "here's this super hot thing that happened to me", and those do run really creepy just imo if they're not a self-ob. Like, I feel like those obvs should've just been reworked into an original story or something. But that's just me.

I agree with the people above me, in certain ways. If you see a hot guy/girl (depending on which you're into), you may tell somebody, like your good bud. An obs isn't something you say to the person or physically do to them.  So unlike rubbing their knee, it's a harmless act (as long as the observers don't get too creepy in the obs), IMO.

[Fen]

This is the very feeling I get whenever I sit down to write an observation I've had, no matter how scandalous or innocent it is. Is the person ever going to find out I wrote this? What would they think if they knew I was working my kink out on them for others to see? Sometimes it feels like a breach of privacy or code of conduct. Sometimes it feels taboo. But chances are, the people I write obs about are never going to find out. This is not a thread or site they are likely to stumble upon.

 

Their brief sneezing fit has much less of a memorable impact on them than it does on us anyway. Chances are they forget our obs even happen. That makes me feel a little bit better when it comes to divulging memories.

[MaiMai]

I do think that a lot of it depends on how it's written. Some obs can definitely be outright creepy, but I agree with murphy dee that it's pretty similar to talking about how hot someone was or something.

I still feel a bit odd browsing them sometimes, though, so I don't often venture into the obs section now.

[Bondi]

I agree with Vet and Murphy Dee. There's also the question of whether the obs actually happened. And even if a similar incident did take place, it might not have been exactly as the writer described it either. You read an obs, it's like a possibly less-detailed story; you're still envisioning what happened in your own way, based on the text that's written in the post, and someone else who is reading it is going to envision it in a different way. If you record someone without their consent, though, that's different because you're putting the footage online showing that exact person, exactly as it happened. Their image and/or sound is up online for us to jack off to without their consent or knowledge. Pretty different from some vague description of an incident that might or might not have even taken place.

[Heathcliff]

I see where people are coming with with the feeling of it being creepy, but really- I don't think we should have a problem with this.

It doesn't seem too different to me to say "I saw a woman with a gorgeous, curvy figure in town today" from "I heard a woman have a gorgeous loud sneeze in town today". As Murphy Dee said, there are clear red lines that you never cross- photographing someone, giving away personal details. But other than that- really, we should relax.

Bondi also raises a great point. Many times when I've posted an obs, it is based in truth; but I will put two separate obs together, change certain details to make it easier to post, and so it gets to the point where the obs didn't quite happen in exactly the way I said. So, I don't really worry about posting them.

One strange thing is I've never really posted an obs of an ex-girlfriend. For some reason I just don't want to go there (at least not so far). So I understand we have our own boundaries.

Edited August 28, 2017 by Heathcliff