Do extroverts tend to annoy introverts?

[Asexy]

Since people can drain an introvert's energy, I wonder if way too much noise from lets say.. a person or a small group of people can annoy them too?

I never really paid attention to this before, but I'm curious lol

[facet]

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[Chanel_no5]

I'm very introverted and I find it exhausting to be around extroverts. That doesn't mean I dislike them as people - some are really positive and giving off great vibes and I like being around them - but yes, it's exhausting. I have this one semi-friend (actually my mom's friend), that I feel like I have to brace myself in advance if I know I'll be seeing her. She's the sweetest ever, she is genuinely kind to everyone, and she has this ability to "inject" people with positivity, if you know what I mean? But when she leaves, I breathe a sigh of relief. It's like I have to speed up my own frequency of existence to a point where my thoughts sound like Chip n Dale just in order to keep up with her normal. That's fine, really, but it's like it's always the introverts who have to go out of their way and adapt to the extroverts "normal", and I kind of wish we could meet in the middle sometimes... or take turns. 

Too much noise and "activity" in a group near me but that I'm not a part of drains me of energy as well, but I think that's more me being an HSP - I need to keep an eye out, keep watch over my surroundings, in case something sudden and unpleasant happens. 

[skater]

Two years ago, I definitely would have answered "YES" to this question. I'm really introverted, and when I got my assigned roommate for college I could tell just from stalking her Facebook that she's about as extroverted as one can get. And that terrified me  

She's now my best friend and I don't think I've ever gotten along with anyone as well as I do with her. I don't know if I click with her so well because she's extroverted or despite of it, but we definitely do balance each other out. She forces me out of my comfort zone which has greatly improved my social life and I tone her down when her extroversion becomes too much for everyone  

There are still definitely some extroverts who are way too overwhelming for me, but there are also some introverts who I get super bored/awkward around too.

[Asexy]

@facet lol I think that's why I'm more attracted to the shy types. I'm not the biggest extrovert, but I do need balance!

 

@Chanel I get what you mean, and I actually think that the most extroverted people happen to have the most outer positivity and actually seek out other people for conversation or the center of attention for energy. Are you ever up for a bit of downtime with an extrovert like that, doing something with minimal people?

[Asexy]

@skatergirl Wow very nice! I guess I just have to be more sensitive.. I think introverts are pretty interesting people so long as they aren't too shy lol

[Chanel_no5]

I do like to hang out with people like that (as long as it's just the one, I don't last long in the vincinity of several extroverts at once), however, a mere couple of hours in that kind of company leaves me so drained that I need several days in solitude to recharge, so I try to avoid it as much as possible. It's simply not sustainable for me as a part of everyday life. It's a bit like spending time in the sun. Some get sunburns easier than others. That's not the fault of the sun, or the skin, that's just the way things are.

However, this is not easy for me to answer head on in a "this is this and that is that and never the twain shall meet" kind of way, because I am both an introvert and an HSP (highly sensitive person). While many things about being an introvert coincides with HSP traits, it's not the same thing, but it's sometimes hard to tell them apart when they're so intertwined in your personality. I also have childhood traumas and PTSD and stuff that further muddles the boundaries, so I will speak from my own perspective and what I THINK is my introversion. Others may have different experiences and responses.

 

One thing that extroverts seem to get wrong a lot of the time is that introverts are bored. I mean, we must be bored, right, especially those of us who are sitting in our silent rooms with only our thoughts for company? Well, the reality is that introverts need less input to maintain a higher stimulation level. I barely go outside, I usually don't speak to people (outside of the Internet) at all, but I AM NEVER BORED. I can count on one hand the number of times that I've been bored the past decade.

Think of a day with enough input to keep you stimulated, not stressed out, but not bored. Just right. Goldilocks stimulated, if you will. That level of stimulation is what I get from sitting alone in my apartment, reading books, writing a piece of fanfiction, poking at my cats. Now think of an incredibly busy day, where it feels like you're bombarded with inputs of all your senses, from all directions at once, with no time to really process any of it before you're thrown into a new unexplored situation. That's how I experience your "normal day". It doesn't really matter if all of those inputs are positive, if you have no time to process them. When they come at you like that, they only stress you out. 

And YES, there are degrees to this too. I'm able to easily connect with extroverts who have a similar "frequency" (I'll call it that due to lack of a better word, besides, I think it very much describes what it's about) to mine - it's easier to catch the same wavelength and vibrate in the same frequency if you're relatively close to start with. But some are just impossible to do that with. Doesn't mean they're bad people, or that I am, for that matter, only that we are literally on different wavelengths. There are people whose frequency is so slow I feel like I'm a yodeling cowboy in a linedance competition trying to communicate with sedimentary bedrock. And I very much understand that's how I come across to many people with a more rapid frequency than mine. I don't have a solution to it, though. Only that people are different. Some introverts enjoy to get more inputs, and it's great that extroverts like to offer those inputs, and it's equally great that introverts can offer some stability and anchoring to extroverts, but neither needs to be "saved". Both parts should keep that in mind. We're just different. 

 

[Asexy]

Introverts are bored?? Well I'm no extreme, but I've never thought they were bored when alone! Every time I see someone sitting alone, I'm like hmm.. what's that person thinking about? Well if they happen to catch my eye lol.

 

Though I think I understand now.. after reading this, I probably have more introverted qualities than I thought, but thanks for the elaboration. I appreciate it!

[murphy dee]

I feel like I'm somewhere in the middle, which means that extroverts exhaust me with their personal energy and inability to be still and quiet, and introverts drive me crazy because I end up being "the leader" when I hang out with them and I absolutely hate that.

I love going out to eat or going to the movies or a concert or a bar or whatever, but I hate parties or gatherings at people's houses. I'm awesome at small talk and getting to know strangers and making a connection in a short amount of time (which is a skill I had before retail but has definitely been honed during my time in retail), but phone calls make me sweat and people knocking on my door is like an injection of adrenaline. So yeah, I don't really feel like I'm totally extroverted or totally introverted.

[sickprincess]

I'm an ambivert, meaning that I'm a fairly even mix of extrovert and introvert tendencies, and I wouldn't say that I feel annoyed by extroverts when I'm feeling more introverted. It just means that sometimes I can stay out all night and have a great time, and other times I want to stay at home and stick to my routine.

The only thing that annoys me about "true" extroverts is when they pressure me to go out and socialize, or act like there's something "wrong" with me because I want more alone time. My ex fiancee would always complain if I wanted to stay in and relax at home, and he'd make me feel guilty if I didn't want to go out with my friends. That was really frustrating because he didn't understand that I was perfectly content to curl up with a movie and some pizza, and I didn't know how to explain to him that I really was happy. 

I definitely have friends who are extreme extroverts and a few extreme introverts, but I tend to get along better with people who are more ambiverts like I am. 

[Asexy]

16 hours ago, murphy dee said:

I feel like I'm somewhere in the middle, which means that extroverts exhaust me with their personal energy and inability to be still and quiet, and introverts drive me crazy because I end up being "the leader" when I hang out with them and I absolutely hate that.

I love going out to eat or going to the movies or a concert or a bar or whatever, but I hate parties or gatherings at people's houses. I'm awesome at small talk and getting to know strangers and making a connection in a short amount of time (which is a skill I had before retail but has definitely been honed during my time in retail), but phone calls make me sweat and people knocking on my door is like an injection of adrenaline. So yeah, I don't really feel like I'm totally extroverted or totally introverted.

Same. My energy isn't drained by alone time or social time, I just happen to feel a bit more energized when hanging out with friends.