The Knight's Poor Nose (F)

[thechickenman]

Hello all. Long time lurker, first time poster. I've wanted to write a story in a fantasy setting for a while now. I wrote this like a one-off, but I might continue it eventually, who knows.

Between work and IRL stuff I don't get much of a chance to write fetish work these days, so I might be a bit rusty on my pacing and stuff. Hope you enjoy the story

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Part 1/?: The Open Road

Lady Cynthia Herrington's horse trotted along the cobblestone roads between her modest kingdom and the far smaller fiefdom to the south. Her jet black hair gently bounced against her shoulders as the steed ambled along as smoothly as it could over such terrain. "My goodness, they simply must pave better roads. My horse will assuredly need new shoes upon our arrival." Despite her concerns about the lesser Lords and Ladies surrounding her sizeable kingdom, she felt that it was her duty to check in on them from time to time. That, and many of them paid tribute to her for protection... and she meant to collect.

Her gripes did not fall on deaf ears, however, as her most loyal knight, a former commoner known as Isabelle Hagan, walked beside her. "That it might, my lady." A muffled, slightly deeper female voice agreed from within a metal helmet. It covered her entire face, save for the small opening allowing her to see. Normally, she would not be wearing her helmet all the time, but as nature encroached all around them her sinuses would begin to act up. Even now, she felt an itch in the back of her throat. The journey would take two days, even with fair weather and minimal stops along the way.

Of course, the Lady of House Herrington was sympathetic to her plight, and would allow her knight to keep her helmet on as long as she did not sneeze, cough, or even sniffle. No Herrington Knight would be seen or heard doing something so unsanitary, the mere thought disgusted her! After all, if she, a noblewoman of high esteem, did not expel mucous in such a manner, then no one could. This was only one of many strange rules and restrictions that kept the list of genuinely loyal Herrington Knights rather low.

"Hold a moment," Cynthia instructed, holding up her hand and tugging at the reigns of her steed. They were passing by a patch of lovely yellow daisies, and they were just blooming. "Be a peach and ensure the steed does not trot off." The noble instructed as she delicately climbed down from the saddle and began to select a few of the most pristine blooms. What better gift than the lovely scented flowers from the outskirts of her own kingdom?

"Of course, my lady." Isabelle obeyed, taking hold of the steed's reigns and facing away from the nice-looking flowery meadow. Just seeing those cursed things made her uneasy. She could only pray that a gust of wind wouldn't surround them with the invisible demon known as... pollen.

The answer to her prayers did come, though it was only because Lady Cynthia was soon waving one of them in front of her helmet. "Can you catch the lovely scent from within that bucket-helm of yours?" She inquired, to which the knight was quick to nod. "O-of course I can, my lady. It is a... lovely fragrance." Within a minute of the noblewoman's gesture she could feel the corners of her eyes watering. "Ahem." The itch in her throat was back again, how dreadful. "Perhaps we should continue, m-ma'am, we haven't left your fair Kingdom yet."

"Indeed, indeed. You always keep me on the straight and narrow, Isabelle." Cynthia agreed, bundling the flowers together and storing them in the saddlebag as neatly as she could. Crisis averted... for now. Isabelle was already having to breathe steadily through her lips, rather than her nose, to keep any irritants at bay until she could safely remove her headgear. The meadow stretched for the next hour or two of their trip, during which time Lady Cynthia had stopped at least a four or five more times. Upon crossing the formal border at the edge the Herrington Kingdom, the horse had a full multi-color bouquet of flowers poking out of the saddlebag.

Poor Isabelle could get away with muffling a cleared throat or a tiny sniffle, as her plate armor was rather heavy. A bit of clanking, followed by a disguised utterance, and she bought herself a few more minutes. "Ah... h-heh..." She hitched, quickly squeezing her upper lip into her nostrils to keep it from progressing further. While she succeeded, she had stopped completely in her tracks, earning her more ire from her lady. "Isabelle, are you already weary? You ought to wear lighter armor on these menial journeys..."

"N-no, my lady, I'm fih... I'm fine." Isabelle protested, jogging to catch up to the lady atop her horse. Their path winded through simple farms and eventually a forest, where Cynthia insisted they stop yet again. "Isabelle..." She began. "These forests are often quite treacherous, won't you remove that helmet of yours? I need you to be able to see more clearly." It was what the knight had dreaded since their departure, but she could offer no counter to her superior. "Come now, we're wasting daylight." With little recourse Isabelle removed her helm, revealing a lightly freckled face and light brunette hair. She did this away from Lady Cynthia's immediate view, allowing her to harshly wipe away the few drippings that had come from her nose.

"Ahem. Shall we proceed, my lady?" The Knight insisted, dearly hoping that none of these trees produced pollen or tufts of cotton. "We shall." Cynthia agreed, placing one of the less perfect blooms behind Isabelle's ear. It was a lovely shade of blue. "It matches your eyes, as well as my royal sigil adorning your armor!" She felt quite proud of this gesture, bequeathing such a gift upon her loyal servant. "Th-thank you, my lady." Oh, great. She could already smell it, and while it was a lovely scent, accompanied by a familiar tingling of her sinuses. Out of the frying pan, into the fire! "B-but, as much as I appreciate your, mmm, g-gih, gifts..." Isabelle held a gloved finger over her nose as they walked. "Flowers, erm, they make me sneeh... sneeh... EEEeeechuuu!" Her head snapped forward, flinging the flower out from behind her ear, and startling the Lady's steed.

"Bah, now you've done it!" The noblewoman hissed, deftly calming her steed and hopping down from it in a huff. She thrust a finger in Isabelle's direction. "What have I told you about that... that vile sneezing you do?" The question was purely rhetorical, as the knight would find out shortly after. "I understand you have allergies, but you simply must refrain from so disgusting in front of me, or others in the nobility!"

"I'mb..." Isabelle sniffled quickly as to not sound as snotty as she felt. "I'm terribly sorry, my Lady." She folded her hands in front of her and bowed her head in shame. Cynthia let out an annoyed sigh, picking up the discarded flora and waving it in the air erratically. "No, no, an apology is expected, but not enough. We're more than half-way to our destination, and I would rather not have you spewing mucous all over when we get there. So!" The flower was then waved right beneath her knight's bowed head, causing her to look up in surprise. "M-my lady, p-please don't... duuuhhhn..." She pinched her nostrils shut, causing Cynthia to slap her armored forearm. "No-no-no-no-no! You've already shown your lack of self-control, don't try to stop it now..." As unpleasant as it was, Isabelle reluctantly lowered her hand, feeling the tingling reach a peak. Her blue orbs fluttered shut. "Aah... Ahhhh!!" No, no, no... the sneeze was caught. "Must I do everything for you?" The blue flower was now nearly touching the sneezy knight's nose, invisible irritants working their way in with no intention of leaving! "Aaaichoo! AaaaAAaah-chuu!" The noble's misunderstanding of Isabelle's ailment actually caused her to make the situation worse! "Aah-choo! Achoo! HeeEEeeeEhhh... heeh-choo!" Isabelle was quite the sight, lurching forward a few inches more with each sneeze, until she was completely hunched over. The knight braced her hands on her knees to keep standing, taking a deep wheeze of a breath. "Heh-chuh! Aaaichu! Aaahchoo! Aaah... ah-ah-aiiiishooo!" Her final fit ended with her gasping for air as she shakily stood upright again. The usual pale, freckle-dotted cheeks had become flushed, and her nose was a noticeably darker shade of pink. Clear mucous leaked down onto her upper lip, which she was quick to try to wipe away.

Lady Herrington stood to the side with one hand on her hip, shaking her head. "Gracious, that was quite the display. Are you quite finished?" Cynthia asked, offering a handkerchief. "I suppose you should have this. There are drawers full of them in the estate anyway." She remarked callously before re-mounting her horse and urging it forward.

"Th-thank you, my lady!" Isabelle replied frantically, not even trying to make her nose-blow dignified. "Ssnnnnrrrrrmmmphhh!" She cleared her sinuses as best she could before tucking the cloth into a pouch hanging from her belt. Her helmet, the only true safeguard against another attack, had already been confiscated. At the very least it would allow Isabelle to silently tend to her agitated nostrils for the rest of the journey. The knight walked with a hand on her sword arm, ready to deal with any particularly nasty creatures lurking out of sight. Every so often there was a rustling in the trees, and what the warrior could swear was high-pitched laughter. Cynthia's earlier suggestion regarding her helmet turned out to be an astute one, as with her expanded periphery Isabelle spotted movement closer to the ground.

In her firmest voice, still sounding a bit nasally, the knight spoke up. "My lady, we are not alone." Her stern words caused Cynthia to seize up and look around frantically. "Well, show yourselves, cowards!"

"Kekekekekekee!" A shrill voice cackled from the bushes, leaping out and brandishing a dagger. "Goblins..." The armored woman confirmed grimly, drawing her blade as another disturbance took place directly behind her. Before her stood the apparent leader of the band, their stature only bringing them up to Isabelle's waist.

"Eeeek!" Cynthia cried out, as three more of the creatures had surrounded her steed. "Kekeke... you don't want your fancy noble-lady to get hurt, do ya? Then keep your distance. We'll be takin' that horse of yours, and uhhh, all your gold too!" The apparent leader of the goblin troupe demanded with a grubby outstretched hand.

"You're bold for a creature of your... low stature." Isabelle said with a smirk, advancing on the short green creature without a second thought. She swung the weapon down, but the goblin darted to the left, then the right, able to move his smaller frame quicker than Isabelle could bring her blade to bear. Though her last slice did manage to shave a bit of the tip of his ear. "Owowowow! Fine, I was gonna spare you, but now it's personal!" Goblins were quite easily offended, apparently. From his ratty leather belt he procured a pouch, tossing it at the knight. Isabelle raised her arm, shielding her face as the pouch burst dark powder all over her metal gauntlet. "Just what did you think that would d-" She began, but the moment she opened her eyes and lowered her arm the question answered itself. Her eyes stung, and her airways filled with a burnt-tasting substance. This goblin had just thrown a pouch of ash and soot at her! It clung to her skin and armor, causing her to cough and spit. Worse, a fair amount had gotten up her nose!

"Kekekeke!" The assailant let out yet another obnoxious cackle, easily able to waltz up to the knight and slap the sword from her hands. She opened a watery eye and swiped at him with her gauntlet, knocking the unprepared goblin onto his behind. "You vih... vile creature... I'll. Aaah..."

Cynthia, meanwhile, was using her position atop the horse to kick the trio of underlings trying to dismount her. "Don't you touch me you vile, stinking, wretched creatures! Isabelle, stop fooling around!" She shouted, her voice filled with both terror and frustration in equal measure. Her heel connected with the temple of one, the horse began to buck and shuffle in place as well, creating a hell of chaotic situation.

For once, her lady was right, this was no time for sneezing! With her clean gloved hand, she held a finger up to her nose. "Eeeh..." Keeping her eye open at all was an effort in futility, as it was tearing up far too much to see anything but a mosaic of colors. She would blindly swing her fist at the goblin, who would crouch, roll, or simply lean backward to avoid it. This thing was toying with her! "I-I haven't the tihh... the time to... tooouh..."

"Too-uhh, what?" The goblin fired back, now to her right. It required his full body weight, but it would be worth doing as he barreled into her right knee, causing the knight to fall to all fours, kicking up loose dirt from the rough forest road. "Gah!" She grimaced from the fall, protected by armor but also weighed down by it, making a recovery next to impossible. "Heeh... haaah..." She heaved with each breath, bringing in yet more irritants.

"What, you're laughing? Bah, you humans. I'll never understand ya! Anyway!" The goblin made his intentions clear by brandishing his knife and taking a stroll up to the downed knight.

"I'm not.. Laahh.. laughing... H-have to... sneeh..." Isabelle muttered weakly, her eye firmly closed again as her head arched back. Even holding a finger beneath her nose wasn't enough! Her nostrils were absolutely clogged with the dark powder the goblin covered her with.

"You know... you've got a pretty face for a fighting type. It's a shame I gotta mess it up!" He sneered, his foul breath right in her face at this point. Rancid, passing right through the soot-caked nostrils, causing a fierce tickle in her sinuses. The arrogant little green man had no idea what he had just done.

"Haah, hah... aaahhh! EeeeaaaahCHOOOO! AAAaaaiiichu!!" Isabelle loosed two colossal sneezes, the second of which dislodged the sooty mass in her nose and propelled it right at the goblin! The viscous sooty concoction splattered right in his eye and caused him to cry out in surprise. "Gaaah! The human used some kinda spell when I wasn't paying attention! Forget this, I'm not getting hexed again! Retreat!!" Not even bothering to wipe the dark sludge from his face, the goblin blindly stumbled back into the brush, with his minions following in short order. The knight didn't notice, however, as she was too busy coughing up the remaining soot that had showered her in the peculiar exchange.

Lady Cynthia once again calmed her steed, who had no doubt aged several years on this singular journey, and dismounted it. Isabelle had managed to stand without the goblin harassing her, and kept her back turned as she let several more sneezes into the handkerchief given to her earlier. "Echu! Achu! Chu! Heh-chnk! Ahshoo! S-sorry my lady I... aichu! He covered me iichu! in soot!" She attempted to explain, earning herself an eye-roll each time a sneeze interrupted her. Cynthia sighed, returning to her horse. "We'll get your armor cleaned, my dear. I suppose you are forgiven this time, as that disgusting sneezing is only surpassed by those filthy creatures who accosted us." It was about as close to approval as Isabelle had been given by Lady Herrington all day.

"Yes, my lady. Thank you..." At this point, Isabelle was too weary to continue apologizing. She instead tried to clear her airways to keep from annoying her Lady too much. Upon exiting the forest, the neighboring fiefdom's settlement in sight, the knight was also granted her helmet again. She would tuck the damp, stained handkerchief away and pray there wouldn't be another incident. The metal headgear muffled her continued wheezing, allowing the remaining distance to a relatively peaceful journey... for Cynthia. Word travelled fast when the territory was as modest as this fiefdom's. So, before they could even pass through the outskirts, the duo were given an escort the remainder of the way by soldiers of House Thornwell. Lady Cynthia and her knight were then escorted into the estate proper, though it certainly didn't sprawl in all directions it was still far fancier than the peasant dwellings surrounding it.

"Welcome, welcome!" A woman greeted them, her hair in a bun and her attire being the nicest thing they had seen so far. A simple green dress stretching down to her knees, accompanied with sheer stockings and heeled green shoes. Before them was Lady Thornwell, and Isabelle took a knee as was the normal custom. "Thank you for your hospitality, fair Lady Thornwell."

"Such manners! Lady Herrington, to what do I owe this great honor?" Even if she resented the idea of a 'superior' noble checking in on her, she had no choice but to play this role if she wished to keep the status quo.

"Do I need a reason to visit my lovely neighbors?" Cynthia shot back, dismounting her horse. "Might I stable my steed within the estate? Horse thieves are getting more brazen with each passing day." She requested. "I'd also like someone to tend to my knight's armor, we had a bit of an incident on our journey."

As if on cue, Isabelle's nose chimed in for her. "Eh-chu!" Due to her heavy helmet, it was almost silenced, but it still earned her a side-glare from Cynthia and a raised eyebrow from Lady Thornwell. "She's not ill, is she? We have an apothecary in town..." The hosting noble mused, smirking a bit. "N-no ma'am." Isabelle insisted, standing back up and taking the reigns of the horse. "Allow me to aaah... ahem, to stable the steed, fair Ladies." Cynthia gave an approving nod and a dismissive gesture. "Very well. Might I ask for a tour of the estate? My last visit was quite some time ago..." The sound of the nobility's chatter faded as Isabelle meandered her way over to the stable. "Eechu! Hashmph! Heeechu!" Using what remained of her willpower she kept from spraying the inside of her helmet too much, wrenching it off her head the moment she entered the stable. The well-trained steed made its way to the water trough and began to drink, leaving the weary knight to regret taking a seat upon a hay bale. A stale, musty odor from the stable's hay supply didn't bode well for the unfortunate warrior woman, requiring her to shield her nostrils with the last clean spot on the handkerchief. Isabelle didn't even bother to blow her nose until she was clear of the stable, eager to get out of her armor and have it cleaned. "Snnnnrrrrrppphhh! Eegh..." She whimpered, probably looking about as unflattering as she had all day.

"Knight Isabelle of House Herrington?" An unfamiliar voice called out from her periphery. "A-ahem, aye, that's correct." Isabelle agreed, slightly startled and trying her best to wipe her upper lip to appear presentable. A short stodgy woman stood before her, likely a halfling or dwarf, hands on her hips. Her gaze was harsh and disapproving. "You've done a number on that armor of yours, eh? I'm in charge of the estate's laundry, if you'll come with me..." The rather presumptuous woman had a lot of nerve ordering around a knight, but she wasn't wrong about the state of Isabelle's gear. She trudged behind without argument, her plate armor feeling increasingly heavy as the sun began to sink further below the horizon. A sweet scent emanated from this woman, betraying her rather rough nature and mannerisms... likely a perfume or scented soap used in her work. Her already irritated airways wouldn't tolerate this for long. The unfortunate knight just couldn't catch a break, could she?

[prismaticpollen]

Very cool story!

[Dgrayman]

Great story 

[deadaccount]

I love this so far! Can't wait to see more!

[thechickenman]

Appreciate the kind words, folks. I have a few ideas as to where this could go when I get more time to write, but suggestions are welcome!

[poiub]

Very well written!

[prismaticpollen]

I’d love to see Lady Herrington learn to appreciate a good sneeze, or at least not be disgusted by it

[anna]

This was literally amazing wow

[thechickenman]

On 10/25/2021 at 2:16 PM, queerkinkarchive said:

I’d love to see Lady Herrington learn to appreciate a good sneeze, or at least not be disgusted by it

I dunno if she'll ever truly appreciate a sneeze, but she might get her turn later on.

[dominchoo]

On 10/25/2021 at 2:16 PM, queerkinkarchive said:

I’d love to see Lady Herrington learn to appreciate a good sneeze, or at least not be disgusted by it

agreed!! i want to hear her get interested haha 

[Blackcat182]

I cant wait to see what happens next

[Niceguy]

Loving this so far!