Clown Kings (Stranger Things, Eddie)

[Skylacticon]

Hey folks. I’m back with more tomfoolery and Steddie. I love these characters and my brain keeps getting little ideas, so we’ll see how long it goes on for.

 

(Context: Eddie’s about to go on tour with his band and is spending time with his friends before he has to hit the road. Of course, they get drunk and Robin challenges him to try the spiciest hot wings in town, which… goes like this.)

 

-

 

“I don’t- AESSCHHiu!! - know what’s going on, aghh…” Eddie’s watery eyes widened and blinked, and he let out a low chuckle, raising the heel of his palm to wipe his eyes. He sat there, grinning like an idiot - then his eyes began to narrow again, and he turned away slightly, still grinning. “Oh no- huh’ISSCHH!!-ioo, Holy shit. *snrf!*” He laughed again, and sniffled somewhat wetly.

 

“I told you it would be too much for you to handle,” Robin murmured, covering her mouth with her hand as she chewed. 

 

“Silence!” Eddie boomed, squeezing his eyes shut. 

 

Robin giggled, leaning back in her chair. “You okay?”

 

A troll-like groan emerged from Eddie as he opened his eyes again, and sniffled hard.

 

“Here, Eds.” Steve came up behind Eddie and slid a little bowl of yogurt in front of him.

 

Eddie gave a slightly pained exhale and coughed. “Oh, what’s this?”

 

“It’s yogurt,” Steve said gently, squeezing Eddie’s shoulders. “I heard someone in class say that-“ “-EEISSCHHhiuu!!” “-Oof, bless you. Heard someone say it helps with spice.” Steve explained, and scratched softly between Eddie’s shoulder blades.

 

“Really?” A drunk Eddie stared down at the bowl of yogurt in front of him. Then softly, incredulously, “…When did we buy yogurt?”

 

“Yeah, I heard that water doesn’t really help, cuz it spreads it around,” Robin pitched in.

 

“Huh,” Eddie said. Then in a lighter, breathier tone: “Huhh… h-hold- huh’ISSCHHh!! -od… oh, hih’-! Huh’ESSCHHiuh!! *snrff!* Jesus.” Eddie sat up straight with his hands on his hips, scrunching up his nose. “Oh, what the hell…” He leaned forward and picked up the spoon in the bowl. As he put a small spoonful in his mouth, he felt Steve kiss him on top of his head. 

 

There was a beat as Eddie swallowed the first bite and had another. After he swallowed again, he let out another sharp exhale through rounded lips. 

 

“Is it helping?” Robin asked, through another mouthful of burger.

 

“Mph…. Yeah, kind of. *snrff!* Ohh, holy shit.” Eddie turned away and coughed into his arm. When he straightened, he wiped his eyes again. “That was…”

 

“Was it spicy?” Steve questioned softly. His hands were still on Eddie’s shoulders, massaging both thumbs close to the base of his neck, in a slow, soothing way. Eddie felt the breath of that question tickle his ear, and if possible, went redder. 

 

Then- “hah’TSCHHh!! *snnrf*” A sudden sneeze, uncovered, causing Eddie’s frame to shudder under Steve’s hands. He kept massaging, slow and with pressure. Eddie blinked rapidly and raised a knuckle to rub his nose. “Whew, oh my god…”

 

“Was it a ‘spicy meatball’?” Robin teased, in a bad Italian accent.

 

“It was a ‘spicy meatball’…” Eddie croaked somewhat miserably, and sniffled. “*snrff*… Ahh… Nothing this man can’t handle,” he murmured, and leaned his head back so that he was grinning at Steve upside down. Steve grinned back at him, practically sober in comparison to his red-faced boyfriend. 

 

Slowly, they moved closer and closer together, like a gravity pull. They kissed once, on the lips, then Eddie reached a hand up and behind him to rest on Steve’s shoulder. He left a dainty peck on his neck, close to his collarbone, then one a bit higher, then on a spot just next to that one. He felt Steve’s chest rumble with a gentle laugh.

 

“What’re you up to?”

 

“It’s one for each mole,” Eddie murmured softly, pressing a fourth kiss on Steve’s jawline.

 

“They aren’t moles, they’re freckles,” Steve voice got muffled a bit as Eddie’s hand attempted to hold his chin steady, but ended up squishing both his cheeks from beneath.

 

“I definitely think they’re moles,” Robin said thoughtfully, waving a fry with ketchup on it.

 

“Okay,” Steve chuckled, as Eddie kept leaving little kisses. He could feel Eddie’s rings digging into his cheek. “Okay, darling, okay,” he laughed, trying gently to squirm out of Eddie’s grip - but the pet name only made him more driven. The attention made Steve’s insides flutter, and he was fine with the roughness, but they weren’t exactly alone at the moment.

 

“You’re so good, you know that?” Eddie said in a dreamy tone, gazing at Steve. He released Steve’s chin and patted him on the cheek.

 

“Here Steve, wanna sit?” Robin offered her chair to Steve, having finished her burger.

 

“Oh no, it’s ok,” he replied with a soft grin, draping his forearms back over Eddie’s shoulders. “How’re you doing now?”

 

Eddie coughed. His head slowly turned away, allowing Steve to see his eyelids flutter shut again before- “huh’ESSCHHh!! -mmnh… Sneezy, apparently. *snff!*”

 

“Bless you,” Steve hummed softly, and leaned forward to grab Eddie’s plate.

 

“*snrf* Thanks, hun.” Eddie breathed, leaning his hands on his thighs. As he took another moment, Steve dumped his chicken bones in the compost bin and rinsed his plate in the sink. After a bit, he cleared his throat. “Whew. See…” Eddie leaned forward with his elbows on the table, pointing his folded hands at Robin. “I finished-“ He raised a fist and burped.

 

“Ew,” Robin’s face scrunched up.

 

“‘Scuse me- finished all of the suicide wings. So techinally- *hic!* -technically, I did fulfill the challenge.”

 

Robin snorted a laugh at Eddie’s dumb, drunken demeanour. Steve smiled over from the sink.

 

“Now that, ladies and gentleman… is what I like to call…” Eddie’s low, charming narration paused. 

 

“Is what you call what?” Robin giggled.

 

Eddie looked away for a moment. Steve glanced over from the kitchen, and immediately knew what was going on. 

 

“huht’ESSCHHIEWW!! - Jeeesus, *snrff!* Eddie let out a harsh sneeze, louder and more dramatic than the others. He raised a hand to wipe his eyes and then his nose, which was gaining more of a reddish hue than the rest of his face. “Ugh... Bless me.”

 

“Ahh,” Robin nodded, in mock agreement. “I see, well said.”

 

“Gesundheit,” Steve said sweetly.

 

“It’s what you like to call ‘achoo’?” Robin teased, and bit into another fry.

 

“Yes,” Eddie said sarcastically with a flushed grin, eliciting another tipsy laugh from Robin. “And thank you, sweetheart. No. It’s… It’s called committing oneself to the challenge,” He elaborated in a dramatic, official-sounding tone. “And the art… of clownfoolery,” he finished smoothly, as Robin dissolved into giggles again.

 

“Congratulations,” Robin said with a teasing grin. “You’re the clown king.”

 

“You called?” Steve appeared behind Eddie again, leaning on the back of his chair.

 

“That’s clown kings, to you.”

 

“Steve, keep this one on a short leash,” Robin jeered. Steve opened his mouth to address something - then closed it, glancing down at Eddie, whose eyes were already on him.

 

“Oh, he does, sometimes. Don’t you, big boy?” Eddie purred, cupping Steve’s chin in his hand again. This time, Eddie leaned back and kissed him hard on the cheek. “Mwah!”

 

“No, yeah.” Steve chuckled, trying to hide how flustered he felt all of a sudden. “Those rare times I’m not on the other end.”

 

“Yes, indeed,” Eddie said softly, staring Steve up and down.

 

Robin blinked. “Well, on that note,”

 

Steve returned a kiss on Eddie’s cheek, and he reacted by scrunching his eyes up in a contented grin. Then he straightened up, and drummed his fingers on the chair. 

 

“Need a ride home, Robs?” Steve offered.

 

“Would be much appreciated,” she replied. She stood and took the empty beer cans from the table, and went to the kitchen to throw them in the recycling.

 

“Hih… huht’ISCHh!! *snrf!*” A softer, itchy-sounding sneeze, which Eddie had pressed into the back of his wrist. He sniffled and blinked his teary eyes. “*snf!* Agh…”

 

“Bless you,” Steve kissed him on the top of his head again.

 

“Thank you… *snrf* Are you gonna leave me here?” He asked softly, looking up at Steve upside down.

 

“Come with us,” Steve interlaced his fingers with Eddie’s. 

 

“I call shotgun,” Robin piped up, from the kitchen.

 

“Mmph, no fair…” Eddie leaned his head back on the chair and reached up to run his fingers through Steve’s hair. His ringed fingers clumsily bumped Steve’s wireframe glasses, making Steve chuckle softly, gazing down at Eddie. Looking into his mellow, glazed-over eyes, Steve changed his mind. He combed Eddie’s long hair out of his face and leaned down slightly. 

 

“Why don’t you stay and lie down?” Steve suggested in a gentle, hushed tone.

 

“I’ll miss you,” Eddie whispered, with beer on his breath.

 

“It’s only like, five minutes,” Steve breathed. “It’ll be just like that,” he snapped his fingers. “Okay?”

 

“Like that,” Eddie repeated.

 

“Yeah. Finish the yogurt, and have some water,” Steve continued in a gentle voice, shrugging out of his blue flannel. He pulled it off and draped it around Eddie’s shoulders. “And I’ll be right back.”

 

Eddie stared at Steve in his white t-shirt. He took his hand and kissed it, still gazing up at him. “Okay.” 

 

“Okay,” Steve patted Eddie’s shoulder, and leaned down to kiss him gently on the forehead.

 

“Congrats again, Eddie,” Robin said, slinging her tote bag over her shoulder. “And break a leg. You’re gonna be a star.”

 

“You’re very kind,” Eddie did his scrunched-up grin again as Robin came over to ruffle his hair. “I guess I’ll see you when I’m back.”

 

“Yeah,” she replied, then her face pulled into a pout as it sank in. 

 

“Oh, well don’t miss me too much,” Eddie teased, turning his body to face her. “Come here.” He stood to give her a hug, long and tight. His smell was familiar - Dove soap, cigarette smoke and now, beer, and it was as if this could be any other night, like they had gone to another house party just to fool around. The flannel almost fell from Eddie’s shoulders, but Robin grabbed it, and pulled it back over his frame.

 

“The next time you’ll see him is at the Grammys,” Steve said with a faint grin.

 

“I’m so proud,” Robin breathed, as they drew back. Her eyes scanned his face for a moment, as they stood there, smiling at each other. “…You’re gonna knock ‘em dead.”

 

[Elle]

Omg! I love this so much. Eddie's drunk helpless sneezing is so hot! Thank you for writing.

[AutumnSneezes]

This is so cute and soft! Poor Eddie being so affected by the spices, but Steve was so cute with him, and Eddie was so chill and sweet! Loved reading this, sneezy Eddie is life! Thanks for sharing!

[funbusej]

You spoil us!!   I am here on the regular to see if you have uploaded a new story!  You do Steddie the best, and it is my FAVORITE ship!!!

[claire h]

love thisss!!! this is so cute and well written! ❤️ thank you for your service haha 

[Prongs]

Okay wait this one might be my favorite 😭❤️ I love the plot. How do you always manage to have just enough plot?! But still the perfect amount of plot to sneeze ratio?! Idk. But I love it.