Anxious about future w kink

[pacificatmospheric]

I’ve been doing kinky stuff related to the kink for about for 3-4 years and my anxiety about whether I’ll meet someone who will be able to fulfill it for me as good as my first relationship did is getting worse. I constantly have the proof that people will do it for me but I guess I just want to know that the person I end up making my main partner will like doing it, and want to do it a lot. Like at least a few times a day. I’d say at least 1/3 of the people I do it with in my casual encounters won’t do it until I am finished. The chiinkni powder is irritating to most. Most people can’t even get enough sneezes out if they wanted to. The only way I’ve seen it reliably work is when someone who is sensitive to sneezing uses the powder until it doesn’t work anymore and then uses a piece of spaghetti after that until I’m finished (I usually just jo while being sneezed on unless the person is rly good at sex and has proven that they know how to use their hands/mouth well enough). I guess I don’t know how to go about explaining how important it is to me. It makes me feel more than sexually fulfilled, it makes me feel like cared about and emotionally fulfilled. I also feel like the amount I want it would annoy anyone who wasn’t my ex. I feel like having it constantly fulfilled was “first love shit”. Anyone have any experience getting sneezes throughout their lives?? Anyone have any tips/advice on how to get the people in my life to understand the meaning of this kink for me more fully? 

[pacificatmospheric]

Aw I didn’t mean to post this in introductions but I don’t want to have to repost this