Stifled Let Go (SPN, Sam & Dean) 1/?

[lillian]

here ya go @secret19 I know you've been waiting!!

Part 1: Control
(pre-season 1; the summer before Sam leaves for college)

A/N: I’m part of the John-is-a-bad-parent club not because he’s inherently bad, but because he’s traumatized by what happened to Mary and never seeks help with dealing with it, instead putting all his energy into his own revenge and trying to make his boys strong, not realizing the emotional and physical neglect that he causes as a result. 

Sammy’s allergies are acting up, Dean’s coming down with a cold, and John is slightly annoyed. 

They’re bickering about something, but John can’t focus on what right now. 

“Dean, admit it, you’re getting sick.” Sam sniffles, sounding worse than Dean.

“Nope. It’s summer. Can’t get sick in the summer.” 

“You’re so full of shit. Just take the DayQuil!” Sam is poking Dean in the back of the head with a blister pack of orange pills. 

“No.” Dean brings the back of his hand up to smother a sneeze into squelchy submission. “nnGXSHT!” 

That makes John wince, snapping him out of his repetitive spiral of remembering and planning. Before he can say anything, his younger son is on it. 

“Bless you. Here.” Sam’s trying to pass a box of tissues over the bench seat, and Dean’s leaning away like a child, insisting that he doesn’t need any.

“Dean, seriously? Your masculinity will survive blowing your nose.” 

John rubs a hand across his face. The bickering is not helping his hangover. He’s about to tell the boys to knock it off when Sam launches into another allergic fit. This is the third one this morning, and it’s not even 10 o’ clock.

“hh… heh! eh…!”

The production of it always irks John.

“hehTCH!ehTSCH! hh… ESHHIEW!” 

John glances into the rearview mirror. Sam’s got his arm over his face, allergic tears brimming in his red eyes. He feels a pang of pity. 

“ESHH!ESCHH!ESCH-CH!...HETSCHHUuu!” They’re repetitive, loud, and don’t sound like they’re relieving anything. “Guh…”

“Gesundheit,” Dean says, a sympathetic stuffiness in his own voice. 

“Thahh ESHHuh! Tha’gs…” Sam blows his nose with a congested gurgle. He muffles two more sneezes into damp tissues, then he finally seems to be done. 

John bites back the gnawing concern, trying to focus on the goal. He needs both boys tonight for this hunt. They’re so close, and they can’t afford to waste any time. 

“Sam, you better wrap this up before tonight–”

Dean sneezes, silent except for a slight sinusy squelch that sounds hollow and congested.

Dammit, Dean. 

“-- because I need all hands on deck,” John finishes, talking over Sam’s concerned "bless you.” John decides he's just going to ignore this SNAFU for now. Dean's good at taking care of his own shit, and Sammy’s too. John knows he's trained both boys well. He just hopes they can both get it under control by nightfall.

TBC...

[secret19]

😅🫢😮‍💨

I have no words. Except “I may die if this does not continue.” 

[SexualOddity]

Oof I love this. It's so totally my jam. Pre-Stanford stuff is my favourite. I just love the whole powder keg of emotions they've got going on, and you capture it so beautifully here.  Also allergic Sam has a special place in my heart.

 

I ĺove Sam and Dean's quiet care for one another, in spite of John, and John's mix of empathy and annoyance is just on point. I tend to agree about John by the way. He's fascinating and I loved writing him when I was more involved in this fandom. I really feel for him - I think he was genuinely well intentioned but obviously he blundered into causing a lot of harm to his sons.

Thanks again for this, I'm definitely excited to follow your story.

[anna]

SPN fic!! Can't wait to read more

[secret19]

At the fear of two comments being too much I just want to say that I check this thread AT LEAST 10 times a day. That’s how much I love this. 

[dwaekki]

I love deans denial, I've always liked it when two guys are arguing over masculinity and illness, please continue 

[secret19]

I miss you Lillian. Come back to me :(

[secret19]

I hope you will eventually continue this story!!!

[secret19]

Hope things are okay @lillian. I know you’re return will be glorious. 💜

[webmeistro]

Just a gentle reminder here... it's okay to praise authors, but don't do it too much. Authors need rest and time off to come up with new and naughty ideas

[RipleyToo]

Please do continue! I love Deans denial and stubbornness!

[gingerdean]

I like this a lot 😁

[lillian]

On 9/16/2023 at 7:23 PM, gingerdean said:

I like this a lot 😁

THE gingerdean? 😍

thank you!!!