Curiosity (SPN, Cas)

[pastelglaceon]

hiii so in a perfect world i would be writing for media more desperately in need of content but spn just has a way of dragging me in

there are sooo many spn fics on this website but not nearly enough with cas, so pls enjoy this little fet dean inducing cas situation

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Dean takes a swig of his beer and rewords the question in his head one more time before finally building the nerve to ask it.

 

“Hey, so, uh…do angels ever sneeze?”

 

“No,” Cas replies, with that patented furrowed brow. “We have no need for human functions or reflexes. Eating, sleeping, sneezing…”

 

“But you can eat, I remember with Famine.” 

 

“My vessel is capable of the behavior, but I have no use for it.” 

 

“So, you could sneeze?”

 

“I believe I could. I’ve never...tried. Is it a valuable human experience?”

 

“No! I mean, not really. It’s just another thing we do, ya know… I guess, it, um, feels good, sometimes. Uh, relieving.” 

 

He looks away and takes another gulp of his drink.

 

“Ah. Like orgasm.”

 

Dean almost spits out his beer. “Ha! Uh, not exactly, but sort of, I guess..”

 

He keeps his eyes trained on his drink, hoping the heat he can feel rising in his cheeks isn’t noticeable, not that he’s sure Cas would even know what it means.

When he looks up the angel is staring off into the distance, and does so long enough for Dean to start regretting every decision that led him to this moment, until his eyes shift to meet Dean’s gaze.

 

“I suppose I would like to try it. How does it work?”

 

Dean feels himself blush even deeper. He hadn’t really expected to get this far.

 

“Oh! Uh, um, hold on.”

 

He looks around the room for a moment before snatching up the brown paper takeout bag from the table between them. He digs around and lets out a quiet “aha!” when he spots his target, a tiny packet of pepper. 

 

Castiel’s calm eyes follow him as he stands and rounds the table, leaning his hips against it in front of the angel. He rips open the small packet and dumps the contents into his palm. 

 

“Right, so, I’m gonna blow this at you, and you just breathe it in, through your nose.…you know how to breathe, right?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Great. So, uh, here goes..!” Dean stretches out his hand and gently blows the pepper into Castiel’s face, whose nostrils flare wide as he obediently sucks in a deep breath. Immediately his brow creases and his nose wriggles. 

 

“Oh..it is vuh-very ihh-irritating..!” 

 

Dean chuckles a bit. “Well, yeah, that’s the whole point.”

 

“Huh-how do I…? huH!” Cas’s breath is jumping wildly, his eyes have slipped shut, but for all his struggling the actual sneeze seems to evade him. The display is sort of fun to watch in its own right, but ultimately torturous for both of them. Dean quickly moves to plan B. 

 

He pulls a napkin from the takeout bag and twists the corner to a slender point. Placing one hand on Cas’s shoulder, he eases the other towards his nose.

 

“Here, I’m gonna help, alright? Juusst..liike…this.” He deftly inserts the napkin point into Castiel’s left nostril. 

 

“huh’pfssh!”

 

It works too fast. He’s barely able to start wiggling it around before Cas lets out a small, wet sneeze right into Dean’s hand. Dean jerks away, pulling the point out with him, and the dam is broken in the angel’s nose. 

 

“huh’pptshhuh! hh’ptssch!-htschuh! huh- huhH- haptsSCHOOH!”

 

He sneezes openly down his front, clear mucus interspersed with black specks running down his face.

 

Dean gulps, crossing and uncrossing his legs. He grabs another napkin and places it in Castiel’s hand.

 

“Hold this against your nose and blow. Cover one side at a time,” he advises, but Cas makes no effort to do so. He’s still hitching with his eyes scrunched shut, a thin stream of tears escaping each one. 

 

“huhh-! huh’tschh! huh’ptsschhooh!”

 

That seems to do it, his breath calms and he slowly raises the napkin in his hand to follow Dean’s orders.

 

When he’s done, he lowers his hand and squints up at Dean, his deep blue eyes slightly bloodshot. His nose crinkles with a wet sniffle.

 

“…I don’t think I understand the appeal.”

[lillian]

Ooh I like this a lot! “I don’t think I understand the appeal” is so very Cas lol

you’ve inspired me to maybe try a little Cas fic! 

[Cambria]

Adorable I really like it thank you for this 😁