Bones Drabbles

[Spoo]

I don’t know about you guys, but I love me some Bones. An ex-boyfriend got me hooked on the show about three years ago (one of the few things I enjoyed about our relationship) and now I’m beyond addicted. The characters are wonderful, as is the juicy storyline! Because of this I’ve decided to write a few drabbles here and there tormenting the lovely cast. These are going to be mostly male with a potential female one thrown in.

I’ve decided to start off with Booth. Aside from being HIGHLY attractive, he’s a big ol’ teddy bear. There’s one episode in the series (season 3, “The Wannabe in the Weeds”) where he sneezes from grass allergies—thus the inspiration for this drabble—and his sneezes are just UNFFF! I literally watched that scene ten times before I wrote this, and yes, I did attempt to mimic their sounds (as freakin’ BIZARRE as they are!!). Let me tell you, Booth has a strange, yet unquestionably attractive, sneeze.

I hope you all enjoy!

~*~

Temperance Brennan took a moment to silently inspect her partner as she entered his vehicle. The two of them were off to investigate a potential suspect for their latest case that Thursday morning. She took note of Booth’s broad shoulders and the way his large hands rested on the leather steering wheel cover. However, her attention was suddenly captured and fixated on his face. As aesthetically pleasing and symmetrical as his features were, there was something wrong.

The sclera of Booth’s brown eyes were bloodshot and watery. His nose was equally irritated. Brennan noted that his wide, round nostrils were slightly chaffed, as if he’d spent the last half hour or so applying a rough texture against them. Perhaps feeling a bit odd beneath her calculating stare, Booth quickly glanced at his partner before returning his focus on the road.

“Something wrong?” he inquired.

Brennan also made note of the nasal quality his voice held; it was the final piece of evidence that she needed to arrive at a conclusion. “Your mast cells are releasing inflammatory mediators, most likely due to particles released from grass,” she observed.

Booth remembered that statement all too well. He recalled Brennan saying the same thing a few years back when they’d discovered a body in johnsongrass. Back then he’d been feeling particularly snappy, yet now he wasn’t so sensitive about his allergies. “They were cutting the grass outside of Parker’s school when I dropped him off this morning,” he explained, sniffling. “It’s been killing me all morning.”

“Judging by your failure to resort to medication when consistent symptoms persist, I would assume you haven’t taken anything as far as antihistamines are concerned?” Brennan asked. She knew Booth quite well and she was more than accustomed to his “tough guy” demeanor.

Booth cleared his throat and removed one of his hands from the steering wheel. Reaching into the center console of his car, he pulled out a few napkins he’d snagged with his coffee from 7-Eleven. The coarse yellow paper was dragged across his nose as he attempted to control its bothersome flow. “It’ll pass,” he finally answered.

For the sake of Booth’s pride, Brennan decided to drop the topic. Although, offering him a tissue from her purse couldn’t hurt. “We’re meeting with the victim’s brother?”

“Graft’s only living relative,” Booth confirmed. “He reported him missing, but something doesn't check out with his sto—hh’PSKKsffschh!” The tail end of the sentence was buried beneath a ticklish sneeze that caught both he and Brennan off guard.

Rather than supply a traditional ‘bless you’, Brennan decided to launch into her anthropological profession. “Some cultures believed that sneezing dispelled the soul from the body, making it a fair target for the devil to steal,” she explained. “That is, of course, completely irrational. If anything, you are dispelling an irritant.”

“Yeah, thanks for that, Bones,” Booth muttered, clearly not entertained by her ‘wise words of wisdom’. “It’s just allergies, okay? Aller…hhuh…ehh’SSHGkkgct!” Already annoyed by his inability to complete sentences, he heaved a frustrated sigh and all but crushed Brennan’s proffered tissue to his nose.

End.

[LeapYearKisses]

Yay, it's Bones! I haven't watched that show in forever, but I quite enjoyed it when I did. Booth and Brennan are just adorable! As for the drabble, I love the way you write for Dr. Brennan; you've really captured her character well - and in such few lines!

I'm looking forward to reading more!

[Talon Winchester]

Me and my Irken pals love this! It's been forever since I've read something Bones related but you wrote this very well!

[alpha_dog]

Thank you Spoo! I love Bones so much

[Sneesee]

LOVE IT! More sneezy Booth, please? Thank you for writing it, and sharing it!!

[27jj]

UNF. Sneezy Booth is SO GOOD. Also, you have the characters down reallllly well:) Loved this!

[stargazer]

Loved it! Your characters are perfect. I could see this happening on an episode. Please write more.

[ilovesneezing]

You write these two perfectly. I do hope there's more to come!

[TheCakeIsAlive]

Oooh, you've captured them so perfectly. Loved reading!

[katia]

Ah! I LOVE THAT SHOW!!! And you recreate those two beautifully. I think I've watched the scene in the johnsongrass a hundred times. AWESOME. I hope to see more!

[atessouhaits]

I love Bones! One of my favourite TV shows ever. I've also watched that johnsongrass scene a billion times.

You've captured both the characters well in this, I really enjoyed it. I hope to read more soon!

[Spoo]

LYK: Thanks, sweetie! Brennan isn't easy to write for AT ALL. She uses these big words... I appreciate your comment nonetheless!

Talon Winchester: Thank you!

alpha_dog: Haha, you're welcome! I loves Bones, too.

Sneesee: Booth's not getting off the hook so easily. I plan to torture him a bit more. Glad you enjoyed!

27jaredjensen: UNF, indeed! Booth is delicious. Thanks for reading!

stargazer: I'm flattered that you think so, but believe me. If I were to write an episode of Bones...heh. Some horribly naughty things would happen to Booth.

ilovesneezing: There's plenty more! Thank you.

Sigrith: Thank you very much!

katia: Isn't that scene to DIE for? Poor, sneezy Booth.

atessouhaits: It truly is an amazing show. I wish it was as popular as House (even though that show is fantastic as well!). I'm happy you liked!

Here we have some Hodgins goodness. Truthfully, I love this man. He's so adorable! Yes, even when he's cranky beyond all measure. I hope you all like it!

~*~

By society’s standards, Dr. Jack Hodgins could be a real grouch. There were few that were able to glance past the scruffy grizzly bear and access the ‘teddy bear’ beneath all the snark. And yet, there were even fewer who dared to try. The man gave off a rather unfriendly aura to those he didn’t consider himself close to. Of course, that wasn’t much different from how he occasionally treated his coworkers when in the midst of his irritated episodes.

As testy as Hodgins was, it was nothing compared to when he wasn’t feeling well. His levels of annoyance were somehow amplified, and everyone, including his pregnant wife, was fair game. Awkward apologies would come later, his friends knew. For now, unfortunately, they were forced to deal with the cold-ridden entomologist, who held no desire to deal with any of them.

It didn’t help that his occupation called for intense concentration and delicate handlings. Pausing so often to cater to his relentless symptoms compromised his routine and only made Hodgins even more aggravated. What he needed was some sleep, but that was not something he would admit aloud, lest Cam send him home (which she’d already tried to do earlier that afternoon).

Angela Montenegro found her husband caught in the throes of misery when she entered his workspace. She carried a mug of steaming herbal tea in one of her hands. The other hand reached out and sifted through the curly, wispy mess that was his hair. “Still hanging in there?”

“Mmmn.”

It wasn’t the answer she was expecting, but it was enough to let Angela know that things hadn’t improved. “You should just go home,” she reasoned. “You’re not the only bugs and slime guy we have on staff here.”

The feeling of his wife’s small belly bump pressing into his back was the only saving grace that kept Hodgins’ sharp tongue in line. “I’m the best bugs and slime guy...” Especially because he was just hours away from fully identifying all the particles the latest victim had brought in.

Setting the mug down, Angela wrapped her arms around the stubborn love of her life. He was tense within her embrace, yet he eventually leant back into the comforting hold, in spite of his hesitance to do so.

“Angie, I wouldn’t get that close,” he warned. Secretly, he didn’t want her to let go.

“Jack, I sleep in the same bed as you. Besides, I’m on enough vitamins right now to protect me from the plague,” she replied, kissing his head. “I’ll drive you home.”

Hodgins couldn’t help the small smirk that kicked up a corner of his lips, yet it was just as quickly gone when Angela pulled away. “Remind me never to allow my immune system to crash,” he mumbled, massaging the heels of his hands into his eye sockets. During the process, however, he must have triggered something in his sinus cavities, for not five seconds later he was smothering the lower portion of his face into the crook of his elbow. “h’KPTSschiish!”

“Bless you,” Angela offered, even though she knew he wasn’t finished.

“’kTSCHhhgkt! Hh’ISHkkt!” It was never one, yet also never more than four. Usually, anyway. Dislodging his nose from the dark blue sleeve of his lab coat, Hodgins sniffled and looked up at his wife; his crystal blue eyes were watery and tired.

Angela sighed. “Home?”

“Polymethyl methacrylate?” Sniff!

It didn’t matter. Hodgins knew he’d lost the battle the moment he gave her the car keys earlier that morning.

End.

[katia]

cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuttteee.....

[TheCakeIsAlive]

Awwwww I love that last line. He's so adorable when he's being all grumpy. *awwww's some more*

[Spoo]

katia: Thank you!

Sigrith: Hodgins is adorable no matter WHAT mood he's in! Gotta love him.

~*~

Over the course of having this fetish I’ve heard several interesting sneeze stories. Some of the more amusing ones revolve around being intoxicated. Now, I’m not much of a drinker (not quite 21 yet) but I enjoy hearing the typical “drunk” tale – from what people can remember, that is. Apparently, it’s not uncommon to sneeze a lot while under the influence. Or so I’ve heard and read from various sources. The notion is an intriguing one that I simply had to experiment with. Besides, sneezing from allergies and colds are plentiful around these parts!

SPOILER ALERT: This particular drabble has spoilers from the latest (2/10) episode of Bones. If you have yet to watch it or simply don’t want to know what happens, I ask that you please turn away unless you wish to be spoiled!

ATTENTION THOSE WITH EMETOPHOBIA: There is brief mention of vomiting in this, but I don’t go into hardcore detail. It’s glossed over, if anything. Fair warning!

There. Now that that’s out of the way, I give you drunk, angst-ridden Booth!

~*~

Brennan searched through the medicine cabinet in her kitchen for anything that would help ease Booth’s migraine. It was nearly 4 AM, and neither of them had even considered sleeping. When it came to hangovers or any other alcohol-related condition, she preferred natural remedies over anything store recommended.

The night had been long and filled with awkward emotions. After she had only one drink at The Founding Fathers, Brennan knew it would be in Booth’s best interest to usher him home. The man was just short of being intoxicated, yet that didn’t help the way he swayed when he finally took to his feet. Nor did it assist him when Brennan was forced to pullover a few times to allow the FBI agent to spill the contents of his stomach along the road.

It was by Brennan’s recommendation that Booth come to her house, at least for what remained of the evening hours. In the morning she would drive him back to his car and then he could choose whether he wanted to go home or not. She didn’t wish to leave Booth alone – especially in the state he was currently in. First and foremost she was his friend, his partner, and right now, even though the man was hurting far beyond her ability to help, she wanted to be there for him.

Brennan heard the toilet flush and the sink turn on in the hallway bathroom as she closed the cabinet after retrieving some Advil. She prepared tea while she waited for Booth to return. Eventually, she was joined ten minutes later by her sullen companion, who looked as pale as he did generally ill. His eyes had yet to abandon their glassy glaze, which let Brennan know that the alcohol hadn’t completely run its course. Wordlessly, she nudged a napkin she’d set the Advil capsules on towards him.

“This should provide temporary relief,” she said softly, offering him a glass of water as well.

Booth said nothing as he downed the medicine in one swift, wincing swallow – just as he’d done at the bar with countless shots. He looked at Brennan, almost confused, but she accepted it as unspoken gratitude and continued to go about making tea. She didn’t wish to bring up Hannah or the failed proposal. Not unless Booth wanted to talk about it, which he’d already refused. Brennan respected this.

Minutes that felt like individual eternities passed by. Neither of them said anything. And really, what was there to say? Booth had taken to leaning back against the counter, his expression unreadable. Brennan continued with her tea preparation, yet paused when she heard two quick gasps of air. Her focus returned to Booth, whose head had tilted back ever so slightly. His eyes closed, his nostrils flared, and his chest expanded as he snapped forward in an open, uncovered sneeze.

“Eh’SSHKggktt!”

The sound was loud and masculine in the quiet confines of her kitchen. Had this been any other circumstance she might have gone into detail about a given culture and their beliefs on sneezing. Today, however, she settled for a more customary installment of human nature.

“Bless you.”

Granted, she spoke the phrase not because she believed that God would save Booth’s escaped soul from eternal damnation, but because she felt it was the right thing to do.

Perhaps surprised by this rare occurrence, Booth sniffed and looked at Brennan before he mumbled out a low, raspy, “thanks.”

Pouring Booth some tea, she handed it to him and then fixed herself a mug. Brennan took hers plain, but she offered both honey and sugar to Booth (none of which he accepted for a reason unbeknownst to her). She wisely assumed he regretted his decision when the bitterness of the tea, perhaps matching the bitterness he currently felt, met with his taste buds. Then again, it could have also been the taste of mouthwash that didn’t agree with it either.

“I set some blankets out for you on the couch,” she commented. “If they don’t meet your personal standard of comfort, I have quite the selection of—”

“Ehh’PSSCHhhigktt!”

Miraculously enough, Booth hadn’t managed to spill his tea, despite the way he yet again jerked forward from the untamed strength of the sneeze. Brennan was now intrigued. She looked at Booth and felt herself cataloging his behavior.

The weight of her scientific stare was uncomfortable. He attempted to return to the previous subject. “Those blankets will be fine,” Booth agreed, taking another sip of his tea. Luckily, he was allowed to swallow before yet another sneeze was upon him. This time, however, the result came slower. A shallow inhalation followed by a greater one seized him, but it was only after a deep exhale that he suddenly gasped and shot the irritation out.“Eh’SSHChhhiuh!

“I recall in my childhood a friend of my father’s experiencing a similar reaction when inebriated,” Brennan mused, recalling back to the days that felt to have never existed. “They would drink together while watching television until their alcohol levels exceeded the permissible limit. Shortly afterward I recall my father’s friend recurrently sneezing. Perhaps your current level of intoxication correlates to the irritation of your nasal mucosa.”

Something about being drunk and sneezing… That was all Booth registered in his muddled brain. With what remained in his mug after a thoughtful sip, he sighed and closed his eyes. The shards of his broken heart poked painfully in his chest. “I’m tired, Bones.”

End.

[ilovesneezing]

GOSH I ADORED the last one!!!! I've not seen the latest one but I think I know what happens

I love the ending, and I liked that she blessed him!

random side-note: I *think* I might have dreamed a sneezy-bones episode where Brennan sneezes and everyone is on virus lockdown in the Jeffersonian around Christmas. Is that a real episode, and if so, which season is it in?? Sorry to plop the question onto your thread but I didn't know where else to ask such a random question!

[Spoo]

GOSH I ADORED the last one!!!! I've not seen the latest one but I think I know what happens

I love the ending, and I liked that she blessed him!

random side-note: I *think* I might have dreamed a sneezy-bones episode where Brennan sneezes and everyone is on virus lockdown in the Jeffersonian around Christmas. Is that a real episode, and if so, which season is it in?? Sorry to plop the question onto your thread but I didn't know where else to ask such a random question!

It's totally fine! I'm glad you liked it.

The episode you're looking for is: "The Man in the Fallout Shelter". It's from season 1.

[katia]

MMM... such a heartbreaking episode that was... and this drabble conveys it in a lovely, sexy way! thanks!

[atessouhaits]

Awwwww, that last drabble was sweet

[Spoo]

katia: Wasn't it? I was on the verge of tears. Poor Booth. He was just so...bitter. He definitely needed a hug. Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

atessouhaits: Thanks!

~*~

I think out of all the "squinterns", my absolute favorite is Wendell. He's also [in my personal opinion] the most handsome one, too. I decided to pick on him this time around. However, if you guys have any requests for the other interns, just let me know.

Enjoy!

~*~

“IGHHShhuih!”

Wendell turned into his shoulder just in time to catch the release. Luckily, he wasn’t near the remains and therefore didn’t risk contamination, but that still didn’t stop his head from pulsing angrily in response. He couldn’t decide which was worse: a ) Not being able to swallow properly from a sore throat, or b ) Not being able to breathe properly from his stopped-up nose. Both made the intern feel fairly miserable.

He had contemplated staying home and sleeping whatever he’d caught off, but seeing as they were so close to wrapping up a case, he knew dragging himself into the Jeffersonian was nonnegotiable.

Still, that didn’t make his symptoms any more tolerable. The prospect of coming home to his apartment and collapsing on his bed had gotten him through the morning so far. Now, if he could only chug through the rest of the day as well. Perhaps he’d snag some cold medicine on his lunch break, considering he hadn’t had time to get some earlier due to waking up late.

The young man was currently hard at work trying to identify the weapon that had killed the victim. From close observation on the entry wounds he was able to deduce that it had been a knife of sorts, but further analysis was needed to confirm. Usually, Wendell would have reached a conclusion a good while sooner, but his illness delayed his genius, and therefore his overall work motif. For his sake Dr. Brennan had been out with Agent Booth to interrogate the multiple suspects involved with his particular case.

The rogue tickle returned again, encouraging Wendell to wrinkle his nose. He’d already sneezed a good ten times since arriving; he didn’t want to make it eleven. Despite his wish, however, his greedy nose was fully prepared to send him into further torment just as the sound of heels entered the room. Not wanting to make an unnecessary spectacle of himself, he decided stifling was his best option.

“Hh’iGKXtt!” Of course, that only made the tickle worse and resulted in another fierce, rapid, “h’NGKXxt!” Somewhat lightheaded from the containment of the sneezes, he sniffled wetly and unburied his face from his shoulder once again. His watery gaze cleared back into focus when a voice called out to him.

“Bless you.”

Sheepishly almost, Wendell smiled at the head of their division, Camille Saroyan, and sniffled again. “Thanks.”

“Not feeling well?” she asked, taking note of his pale features. As the boss Cam knew that there was something going around. First it had attacked Hodgins, then Sweets (for whatever reason, considering he didn’t come in as much nowadays), and now it appeared to have gotten Wendell, too.

“I’ve felt better,” the blond admitted. “I’m just about finished identifying the weapon.”

“You said that about, oh, an hour ago,” Cam replied, loosely folding her slender arms against her chest. It wasn’t her intention to be cruel with her statement; she merely wanted to let Mr. Bray know that he wasn’t performing up to par, which more or less meant he needed to go home, stat. Chicken soup and rest were much better than decaying remains and murder weapons.

Unlike a certain shaggy-haired entomologist, Wendell wasn’t the type to argue when he detected a subliminal message in his superior’s tone. Besides, he really did feel horrible. “I should probably wait for Dr. Brennan to come back,” he said. The last thing he wanted was for her to come back to an empty work station with little progress on what was supposed to be his job.

“I think Dr. Brennan will understand,” Cam answered, smiling. “Get some rest.”

Wendell nodded and proceeded to remove his gloves from his hands. “Thanks, Dr. Saroyan.” A damp cough was suppressed in the cavern of his mouth as he departed the examination platform, leaving Cam alone to watch his receding figure, who just before disappearing ducked into his shoulder again.

END.

[ilovesneezing]

Aaawwww poor Wendell! You write these characters fantastically! Thanks SO much for the info, you're my new BFF

[Spoo]

Aaawwww poor Wendell! You write these characters fantastically! Thanks SO much for the info, you're my new BFF

Ah! I did not see your comment, dear. I'm so sorry for the late reply! Anyway, thank you very much! I'm glad you approve. And you're welcome about the episode information. Anytime!

[Spoo]

Hi! There was recently a new Booth story on the forum, and it encouraged me to post another drabble. Thanks for the boost, kristen!

This time I'm picking on Sweets. I'll admit, I didn't like him at first, but he's grown on me. Kind of. The only thing I really like about him is that he's a total Booth x Brennan fan!

Come on. You know it's true.

Warning: There will be spoilers for the ending of the 6th season! If you haven't watched Bones that far and don't wish to know what happens, please don't read!

Enjoy!

~*~

"So," Lance Sweets began, staring at the two that were sitting across from him. "Things have changed. Am I right?"

Booth glanced at the woman sitting beside him - the woman who was carrying his child. Although Brennan wasn't too far along, her belly had taken an almost adorable roundness. She returned Booth's look and smiled.

"I'll say," the FBI agent replied.

"Is it safe to assume you two are in a relationship?" Sweets continued, interested.

The young psychologist had been studying the parters for a while now. Seeing them act this way towards one another was fascinating. He couldn't help but adorn an eager expression as he watched Booth wrap an arm around Brennan's shoulders.

"I wouldn't call it a 'relationship'," he replied, kissing her cheek. "It's more like…an understanding. Right, Bones?"

"I believe that's an accurate term to describe our status," Brennan agreed, leaning back into Booth's arm.

Sweets blinked. "I'm not following. You both are clearly more intimate - openly, even - and yet it's just an 'understanding'?"

"It's hard to explain, Sweets," Booth laughed.

He didn't expect anyone to understand what he and Bones had now. A simple 'relationship' didn't seem like enough to describe it. What they had transcended that on several levels.

Nonetheless, Sweets was determined to make sense of everything. "Okay. In this 'understanding', have either of you come to terms with…" The sentence was abandoned as he suddenly snapped down into a closed fist. "H'pffssch!"

"Whoa!" Booth exclaimed. "Getting sick there, buddy?"

Sweets sniffled and shook his head. "No. Daisy visited earlier after coming back from her sister's house. They have a d…hih…'ksschhh! H'chffsch!" He sneezed twice, this time a little more forcefully. "Excuse me. They have a dog."

"His mast cells are releasing inflammatory med—"

"Allergies," Booth interjected, saving Sweets from Bones' scientific mumbo-jumbo.

"That's what I was going to say, Booth," Brennan said.

"It's the worst. She left over two hours ago and I'm still sneezing," Sweets complained, rubbing his eyes. "Anyway, as I was trying to say, have you two..."

This time, there was another interruption: Booth's phone began ringing. The man hesitantly answered the call. After a few confirming words, he hung up and then began to pull himself to his feet.

"Sorry to run, Sweets, but Bones and I have a lead," Booth explained, helping his partner to her feet.

"I would recommend taking an antihistamine, Sweets," Brennan suggested, pushing her arms through her coat. "It should mediate your symptoms."

Sweets watched as the couple hurried out of his office and closed the door behind them. "Sure," he sighed, leaning back in his armchair. "Good talk."

END.

[ilovesneezing]

Sweeeeeeeets! He's adorable. I have to say my favourite ep has to be Wannabe in the Weeds. Booth + sneezing? YUMMY.

I hope you write more soon! I love them SO much

[Evergreen]

awww. i'm so flattered! i'm glad you're writing bones again. maybe we can all start a little bones circle of fics like criminal minds has had lately. haha. a girl can dream.

anyway, sweets is my favorite and this was adorable. i'm so upset he's leaving. if i weren't so worried about messing him up, i'd totally write a sweets fic.