Is fatness or weight gain attractive or gross?

[PegiiL]

I know that there are people who posted a clip of regina george gaining weight online but I was thinking of opinions on this site regarding weight gain or being overweight.

[Squadilah]

Well this is a very vague question, but in my opinion, and many males share this opinion, overweight girls/women are unattractive.

[doggo]

I would figure there are many different tastes.

However, shouldn't this be in off-topic?

[bloom]

Actually I sort of think it almost belongs in the Snake Pit, if we're going to be calling entire groups of people unattractive based on one attribute.

[tma]

Well this is a very vague question, but in my opinion, and many males share this opinion, overweight girls/women are unattractive.

*wonders about the opinion of very many males in regards to overweight boys/men*

[sneezesweater]

Really, for me, it just depends in the woman. I mean can anyone honestly not think that Adele is gorgeous regardless of how much she weighs? A pretty woman is a pretty woman to me. On tbs flip side some like honey boo boo's mom or whatever her name is will always be unattractive to me. She could weigh 130 and have a six pack. Sorry. She doesn't do it for me lol. Claire Forlani could put on 50 lbs and still be gorgeous. It just depends man. Why's this an issue anyway? I'm more interested in how they blow their noses and sneeze. Maybe their taste in sweaters as well lol.

[Vetinari]

I have moved this thread to Off-Topic as it did not seem, in any way to be a related fetish, although obviously for some people extreme weight gain and extreme obesity does seem to be somewhat fetishised. PegiiL does not have access to the Snake Pit, so it cannot be placed there. Please note therefore, that any replies must avoid ranting, flaming, or excessive negativity. Although this is not one of the areas specified, Rule 2 still applies:

2. If you do not have anything nice to say, do not say anything at all! The obvious exception is the Snake Pit where this guideline is relaxed. This is especially enforced in the stories, obs and media areas. People put a lot of effort into providing material for the entire forum, and critique or outright criticism are neither appreciated nor tolerated, unless the author has specifically requested constructive criticism.

The modern media would have it that thin is attractive, and obese is unattractive, however, like pig, I believe there are many different tastes, and thank goodness there are.

[Smokey]

I only think that being overweight (for me personally) is unattractive when you can see it is affecting that persons health, and even that i do not find necessarily off-putting, just quite sad really. Some people can generally just be naturally slightly bigger built, it's only in our current media day & age where were made to feel (females especially) that you have to be a size zero to be attractive.

[_Daisy_]

It's all subjective. You can't take one single attribute and call it "attractive" because there is no universal objective standard for what beauty is. I personally find slightly overweight (in conjunction with a bit of muscle) males very appealing.

[doggo]

You know I was just thinking about this today... So, a couple of years ago I managed to lose a lot of weight. I was very slim. I felt gorgeous. A lot of guys were approaching me that time, and I thought it must have been because I was so slim.

So, time passed, and suddenly I had a lot to do in my life that I found way more interesting than managing my weight. I "let myself go", and gained everything back. Now I'm overweight again, and also a couple of years older, and guess what? Those crazy dudes are still approaching me. Especially lately I've been hit on like crazy. Just a few days ago, after I had passed by this young man who was talking with one of the old guys who live on my street, he apparently then decided to run after me to ask me out. He was a very good looking, well dressed, and fit young man, and he must have ran about 200 meters to catch me. Sadly I'm just really not looking for company right now, but I couldn't help feeling rather weirded out - not only am I overweight, wear glasses and cut my hair myself, but I was also particularly looking nothing special even for myself that day.

Men. Can't effin understand them. <3

Then again, I've never understood what's so attractive a man being tall, or muscular. I prefer kinda dainty men. Each to their own.

[Jorm]

PegiiL does not have access to the Snake Pit, so it cannot be placed there.

As in it physically can't be done? The software setting won't allow it? Because otherwise not having access to the pit shouldn't be an excuse for allowing things that are likely to get heated to be posted elsewhere.

[doggo]

Ouro, at least I trust this can be kept civil. If someone starts being an ass, let's let the mods give 'em hell.

[•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•]

Neither, pegiil. Weight gain is just something a body does. Every body is beautiful.

[Vetinari]

PegiiL does not have access to the Snake Pit, so it cannot be placed there.

As in it physically can't be done? The software setting won't allow it? Because otherwise not having access to the pit shouldn't be an excuse for allowing things that are likely to get heated to be posted elsewhere.

Ouro, I was torn.Although it is physically possible, I wouldn't put a thread in the Pit where the original poster could not then reply, or comment on their own topic. The alternatives were to move it here or delete altogether, and, for the moment, it's here. If anyone feels that it would be more appropriate for it to be removed, please feel free to contact me. I am aware it is a vey difficult and controversial topic for many people, though so far, the majority of posters have been very civil.

[Hedgehog]

This is a quite sensitive topic for me, because though I have normal weight, I've been living with eating disorders since my early childhood.

So when I read this question a few days ago, I was curious and also a bit afraid about what would happen. And honestly - I'm very positively surprised by the answers. This really seems to be a very special forum.

On topic - I think we can't really change what we are attracted to - this is partly instinct (hormones, pheromones aso), partly cultural influence. But we have our intelligence to make an aware decision on how we assess our fellow human beings. As for me I think the outward appearance should neither be the only nor the most important part of that decision.

[March Hare]

One of the most unattractive things in the world, surely, is the dogmatic conviction that people's bodies should all be held up to one standard.

[The Dude]

PS- the song is even better if you substitute "butt" with "sneeze".

[Bruyere]

One of the most unattractive things in the world, surely, is the dogmatic conviction that people's bodies should all be held up to one standard.

This.

[Poppy]

Just be healthy. That's all that matters to me.

[zneeze]

PS- the song is even better if you substitute "butt" with "sneeze".

Never thought to do this before, but very clever idea!

Personally, body size and shape is a middle-of-the-road attribute when determining how attracted I am to a woman. My first girlfriend was "overweight," if that term can be used objectively, i.e. BMI-wise. But (at the time) everything else about her made me very attracted to her. There are a few other heavier girls I've found more attractive than certain skinny girls, etc. Beauty will always be in the eye of the beholder, and everyone's preferences are subjective.

In other words, and more succinctly put, this:

It's all subjective. You can't take one single attribute and call it "attractive" because there is no universal objective standard for what beauty is.

[•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•]

One of the most unattractive things in the world, surely, is the dogmatic conviction that people's bodies should all be held up to one standard.

Here here!

[YoriYori]

I think it depends on a lot of things.

There's health. If someone has become so overweight that they are no longer able to carry on a normal life it is very ... I wouldn't say "unattractive"... but I'd say distressing. If you watch interviews with these people, an idea that often comes up is a loss of dignity. Although I could become friends with such a person, the sadness and physical limitations would mean I couldn't feel sexually attracted. Or, even if I could I would have to consider my needs and desires as well. I want a partner that will, to the best of their ability, be with me for the long term and not jeopardize that by neglecting health. I also want children. If a partner couldn't provide me with these things due to health issues as a direct result of obesity, I'd have to look elsewhere.

There's self-esteem. For some people, being overweight doesn't seem to bother them much. For others, it makes them so insecure they hide away and do not allow themselves to open up to people very easily. Although I am not overweight now, I was in the past. It deeply affected my perception of myself and my ability to have confidence interacting with other people. Even now I feel horrible about myself and find it difficult to go out. I am well aware that the wall and don't-talk-to-me-aura I have put up from this is something that makes it difficult for people to approach me so I might as well be "unattractively overweight".

My boyfriend, on the other hand, is very overweight. However, when he started talking to me it wasn't his weight that I saw. It was him. His personality and his confidence were such that appearances were no barrier to the relationship that would eventually develop. He doesn't allow his weight to get in the way of what he wants and THAT is very attractive. (...It helps that he also knows how to dress decently despite his size. )

[Jorm]

So much of this is cultural. If you look back at art over the centuries you'll see the women depicted shifting back and forth in size. During periods of famine heavier women were seen as far more attractive because it was associated with wealth and in fact, health. Equally in "primitive" times larger, curvier women were idolized for their connection with motherhood and fertility, wide hips and big breasts suggesting a fertile women and therefore a connection with the mother goddess and fertility of the land. Historically larger women have probably been seen as the more attractive ones more often than thin women. Even today despite the media saturation of skinny women the wide hips and big breasts appeal remains.

[keistar]

It completely depends on what you're into. For me to be in a relationship with someone, there needs to be an emotional attraction.

If I'm just looking at people without knowing personality, I tend to be attracted to larger women. And I want to hug them (...that's kinda creepy, sorry). Strangely, I don't feel that way about larger men, but that could be because I'm mostly into women and therefore find more androgynous men attractive.

[Orionbob]

I think we can't really change what we are attracted to - this is partly instinct (hormones, pheromones aso), partly cultural influence.

I can only speak from my own experience, but after having followed a lot of body positive blogs on Tumblr, I've (over time) found myself finding bigger people appealing more often. I think it's a matter of getting used to body types other than the one type Hollywood glorifies, seeing women who look kind of like me and seeing that it's more normal than I thought. It helps to associate fatness with things blogs like chubby-bunnies shows me, associating it with people who are confident and fashionable and happy. I think most people don't see that very often, so they might have more negative associations than positive ones.