Bad/stupid jokes

[Enkidom]

An Inuit was paddling down an ice covered stream one day, on his way back home from a hunting expedition. Even dressed in layers of furs, he was feeling the bitter bite of the wind, and the sting of being lashed with fresh-fallen snow. "Oh how I wish I was home and warm" he thought. The hunting grounds were far from his village and eventually he could stand it no longer so he stopped by some sad looking, skeletal trees and started breaking off branches, piling them up in the bottom of his hide canoe. After some time he had enough to start a fire, and rubbed his hands together in gleeful anticipation of warmth to come. Three hours later, his body, almost encased in ice, drifted past Oleka, another hunter from his village, closely followed by the charred remains of his canoe. Oleka shook his head sadly..."Poor Inuka", he whispered to himself, "he should have known that he can't have his Kayak and heat it..."

[boogerbrains]

one day a man is walking home from work and he thinks he hears someone following him. he keeps walking and realizes that indeed as he walks there is a "thump, thump, thump" coming from behind. he pauses and the thumping pauses too. he walks faster and the thumping becomes more frantic. the man is sort of freaked out so he runs into his house and slams the door behind him, but hears it broke off the hinges. he hides in the bathroom and turns around and sees that he has been followed home by a coffin. desperate for something to defend himself with, he reaches into the medicine cabinet and throws a bottle of nyquil at the coffin

and the coffin stops LOL!!!!!!!

[Enkidom]

A man had a crush on a lady by the name of Thora Taylor. Now one day it so happened that they had been invited to the same fancy dress party, with a theme of Shakespeare quotes. Thora, who adored cheese, had let it slip previously that she would find it amusing to work her beloved dairy product into a fancy dress costume and so her admirer decided that this is what he would do. He thought long and hard about how he could marry this with the theme of Shakespeare quotes and finally inspiration struck him. He dressed in his normal clothes, but placed a wedge of french soft cheese on a string around his neck. On arrival, the host looked him up and down incredulously and said "the theme was Shakespeare quotes - I think you've missed the point mate." "Au contraire", the man stated "for you see, I have come dressed in a little brie for Thora T."

[cuneas]

An old friend of mine who I recently lost loved this particular stupid joke, so in her honor:

You're American when you go into the bathroom, and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, but while are you while you're in the bathroom?

European.

Think about it.

[Graham Cracked]

What kind of overalls does Mario wear?

Denim, denim, denim. (better said out loud than written out xD)

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'I'll serve you, but don't start anything!'

Two peanuts were walking through the park at night. One of them was assaulted.

Two antennas met on a roof, got together and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

A man wakes up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouts, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" The doctor comes in and says, "I know, I amputated your arms."

I went to seafood disco last week. I pulled a mussel.

A dwarf who was a mystic escaped from jail. Word got out that there was a small medium at large.

THANK YOU, GOOD NIGHT!! Kudos to anyone who can name where I got these from

[SpookyScarySkeleton]

This is what my ex boyfriend told me.. Not sure if it was him chocking on the.. But anyways. Haha. ---------------------------------------- Why can't you get past E in the alphabet?. Because you're too busy chocking on the D. ------------------------------------ Notes : like the verb "Choke". Anyways. Huehue. Kinda stupid it's funny.

[cuneas]

If two potatoes are walking down the street, how do you know which one of them is a prostitute?

It's the one that has "Idaho" stamped on the side, of course!

[MoonDuck]

What's brown and sticky?

a stick

And a Doctor Who one that is really bad that you probably won't get but it is so stupid if you do:

Why is Eccleston scared of McGann? Because McGann Hurt Eccleston.

[cuneas]

What do you call the veterinary surgeon who operates on the racehorses?

The doc of the bay!