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Subtly Clashing Wishes

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@Juto

No don't stop! They are hysterical. Cally, you have to see these!

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I've seen that next to last one before and it is exactly what was in my mind when I wrote the scene in A Charity Event with Mycroft in the laundry room sneezing and Greg walks in.

But you haven't posted the one with Greg talking to John telling him that Mycroft is a good kisser. That's my favorite. Find that one and then you can be done. Kaze, if you haven't seen that one you'll love it.

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This. Is. The. Last. One.

Simply because I had to delete all my other attachments to fit these and I have no more room :(

This made me laugh so much for some reason! His expression just kills me!!! :lol:

post-18503-0-35863400-1446880425_thumb.j

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Oh Yes!! You nailed it the expressions on John's and Greg's faces are perfect! I liked the other ones too. You are too funny. Hope you get a nap in today. ?

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Oh Yes!! You nailed it the expressions on John's and Greg's faces are perfect! I liked the other ones too. You are too funny. Hope you get a nap in today.

As long as I made you smile! :D have a great day!! MWUAH!! :heart:

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I wish I could just quote the entire Barometers one cuz there are sooooooo many good quotes but i'll snip my faves

Mycroft came around his desk and offered his hand. “Come along, old man.

Oh god Mycroft XDD

Why smartypants never learned, he didn’t know.

Because my dear inspector, he's Mycroft Holmes ;)

“You mock my pain?” Mycroft was tetchy.

“Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling you something.” Greg quoted back at him, keeping his tone light.

Hnnnnnnngggggg <3

“Buttercup? Fezzik? Humperdinck? This author has a penchant for unusual names.”

“Says the man named ‘Mycroft’.” Greg rejoined as he finished rinsing the soap off of his love.

Point to DI Lestrade XD

I adored this, will come back and read more when I have time. Libriel needs me at the moment :P

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I wish I could just quote the entire Barometers one cuz there are sooooooo many good quotes

I adored this, will come back and read more when I have time. Libriel needs me at the moment

Thanks Kaze! I thought you might like it with all the PB references. You are completely welcome to come back and read more when you have the chance. Far be it from me to distract you from MC and Camp Libriel. We need you there for sure!

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In Flu Shot I introduced the idea that newspapers make Mycroft sneeze. Juto asked if I would "expand" on that. I know that the idea that Mycroft would actually read a newspaper is a bit controversial, given his position as the British Government. My contention is he reads papers not for the obvious information, but for all the information that is between the lines, so to speak. I also believe Mycroft would enjoy the arts and leisure sections.

This story is rather long, but I'd rather post it here than in the fan fiction area since it has some obvious links to other stories in this thread. Besides it may be a topic I revisit.

I own nothing. Comments are love and I would really like to hear others opinions on Mycroft and newspapers. Feel free to disagree!

Greg Makes A Deduction

Mycroft Holmes was brilliant and incredibly observant about everything and everyone, except himself. Which stood to reason, thought Greg. How many of us are truly good observers of ourselves? Why should Mycroft be any different in that respect? Greg knew he, himself, was pretty observant, after all he had been trained to be. If it took him longer to pick up on a observation or a pattern than it took Mycroft or his brother, Sherlock, he tried not to feel too bad about it. Those two were in their own league.

There were things Greg had noticed about Mycroft in the time they had spent together, first as erstwhile colleagues on Project Sherlock, then as friends and finally as a couple. Mycroft had a penchant for secrets, a need for control, a sweet tooth and allergies. As Greg got to know the elder Holmes better and they spent more time together socially, he realized that Mycroft was introverted and emotionally reticent; he struggled with anxiety and OCD, which sometimes led to overeating, particularly cake; practically everything made him sneeze.

Naturally, Greg wanted to improve anything he could for his lover. He realized just being patient went a long way with Mycroft. Greg avoided triggering his anxiety and OCD as much as possible, and if he did, then he enjoyed indulging Mycroft’s sweet tooth. It was the sneezing that interested Greg. He would really like to find a way to make an impact on that. It was certain that Mycroft had seasonal and environmental allergies that made him sneeze and sniffle all spring and early part of autumn. Mycroft generally took antihistamines year round and added other meds during the worst seasons. But there were other times Mycroft tended to be sneezy and for no apparent reason. It was those situations Greg decided to apply his observation skills.

Mornings were certainly a time Mycroft was guaranteed to sneeze. This wasn’t something Greg had known until he and Mycroft started sleeping together semi-regularly. (How regular could it really be given their schedules?) Mycroft had been adorably embarrassed when Greg made it known he was on to the reason for Mycroft’s early escapes from their bed. The morning fits were worse spring and autumn, but he still sneezed every morning without fail. When Greg gently asked Mycroft what made him sneeze in the morning, Mycroft merely shrugged and said it had always been so. Greg noted that some morning seemed to be worse. Often it could be explained by allergies or a head cold. Not withstanding however, Sundays were the worst mornings for Mycroft. Any number of times plans had been changed due to Mycroft being too sniffly and sneezy on a Sunday. Greg didn’t mind, but wished he could do something just to relieve his partner of the symptoms.

After a particularly nasty fit, Greg asked, “My, why are Sundays so bad for you?”

Mycroft looked questioningly at Greg, as he set his handkerchief aside. “Sundays tend to be the best part of the week. There is usually little work and I am able to spend time with you.”

Greg chuckled. “No, love, the sneezing. Haven’t you noticed you sneeze so much more on Sunday mornings, even if it isn’t allergy season.”

“I am sure I do not know what you mean.” Mycroft’s cheeks had pinked and his tone was prickly. Mycroft really didn’t like talking about his sneezing.

Greg chose to push a little further. “You don’t think you sneeze more on Sundays?”

“Gregory, I am not in the habit of counting how many times I sneeze in a day.” Mycroft sniffed and went back to his Sunday paper. “I would likely get nothing done,” he grumbled under his breath.

There was silence for a moment and then…”Hih’tsh, heh’etch…esch, esch…Hish’CHOO!”

“Bless you, love.” Greg decided he would start keeping count, starting tomorrow.

After only a few weeks Greg was convinced of his hypothesis. Mycroft sneezed three to four times more on Sundays than any other day of the week. It was usually in the mornings, but sometimes not. Greg had a theory as to why. First, he had to check something with Anthea.

It was a little tricky getting Anthea on the phone without tipping off Mycroft. Greg figured a weekday morning right after Mycroft left the flat would be his best bet.

* Call me if you have a minute. –GL *

His mobile rang almost immediately. “Is he ill?” Anthea sounded anxious.

“No, he’s fine. Sorry, didn’t mean to worry you.” Greg was apologetic.

“It’s okay. He has a very important meeting this morning. I thought when I saw your text…well, nevermind. What do you need?”

“I just have a few questions.”

“Go on.”

“Does Mycroft read the paper at the office during the week?”

“No, not normally. He has people to do that for him. All the news that it relevant is summarized and given in a report within ten minutes of his arrival.”

“So he never touches a newspaper or newsprint at work?”

“On rare occasions, there will be a print source in a language we don’t have a reader for, then he will get an original copy. “

“Tell me, does that bother him?”

“No, he actually seems a bit pleased.”

“I mean physically bother him. You know, make him sniffly and sneeze?”

Anthea laughed. “You mean more that usual? I can’t say I noticed. But very seldom does he get a paper. I think the last time was a month ago and he had a terrible head cold at the time.”

“Thanks, Anthea.”

“What are you getting at Greg?”

“Just a theory. I’ll let you know if it pans out.”

Greg hung up. He had hoped Anthea would tell him Mycroft had a newspaper everyday and never sneezed once. Greg was disappointed not to have eliminated newspapers as a trigger. Mycroft loved reading the Sunday papers. “Brain Candy,” he called it. He even indulged in a tabloid or two on Sundays, for “the rare nugget of truth.” If he didn’t get a chance to read them in the morning, as he preferred, he would read them in the evening. The evidence so far was not damning, but it didn’t look good.

The following Sunday found Greg in the kitchen pulling fresh baked cinnamon rolls from the oven. It was a rare morning that he found himself awake before Mycroft and Greg thought he’d treat his partner. Greg liked baking, but didn’t often find the time. In fact, today he relied on dough he had previously prepared and frozen.

Greg heard Mycroft coming down long before he saw him. “Heh’Etsch… esch, esch…Hih’Etschhoo! Heh’EtchSHOO!”

“Bless you, love!” He called out.

Mycroft entered the kitchen sniffing appreciatively. “Those smell lovely, dear. What is the occasion?”

“Only that I got up before you.” Greg smiled at Mycroft.

“Hmm ...Remind me to stay abed more often.” Mycroft moved to stand closer to Greg and the rolls.

“I can remind you, but you won’t do it.” Greg started drizzling milk into the bowl of confectioners sugar to make the glaze. Mycroft wrapped an arm around Greg’s waist and pulled him in for a kiss. His other hand unerringly sought the bowl of glaze and a long finger dipped in, coating itself in the sweet goo.

Greg caught Mycroft’s wrist and gently ended the kiss. “Mr. Holmes, am I going to have to arrest you for stealing?”

Mycroft smirked at Greg and with a simple twist his hand was free. He licked his finger with obvious relish. “I do not believe that is your division, Detective Inspector.”

Greg tossed back his head laughing and pushed Mycroft away. “Go get the table ready, you prat.”

As Greg finished preparing the rolls, Mycroft readied the teapot for himself and the French press for Greg. A bowl of sliced apples and a plate of sharp cheese rounded out the meal. When Greg brought the plate of warm cinnamon rolls to the table, he found Mycroft frowning.

“What’s wrong My?” Greg asked.

“I am unable to locate my newspapers. Did you bring them in?”

“Yeh, I left them in your study. I thought you might find it too messy to eat cinnamon rolls and read the paper.”

Mycroft considered Greg’s reasoning. “Very well,” he conceded.

Greg inwardly heaved a sigh of relief. He was hoping to keep Mycroft away from the newspapers as long as possible today. He wanted to see if Mycroft he his usual Sunday morning fits without the newspapers being present. Breakfast was notably peaceful. They were able to catch up with each other. Greg convinced Mycroft to come out and help him buy a new pair of shoes. It helped that Mycroft received a text from Anthea saying important documents had arrived for him to review.

The rest of the morning sped by with little interruption from Mycroft’s nose. First they stopped at the Diogenes Club offices. Mycroft reviewed the documents and gave Anthea further instructions while Greg leveled up in Candy Crush. They moved on to the shoe store. Not as exclusive as Mycroft’s cobbler, but Greg had been won over to the importance of well-made foot wear. The smell of leather and polish did trigger a minor outburst from Mycroft upon entering the shop, but nothing more. They stopped at a quiet bistro for a light lunch and then headed home. Arriving back at the flat, Greg dropped the keys in the dish by the door and admired his new shoes before slipping them off.

Mycroft smiled fondly at his partner. “Like a small child,” he murmured as he hung up their coats. Greg grinned impishly back a Mycroft.

“You fancy a drink? I was goin’ta have a beer and watch the game a bit before starting dinner.”

“Mmm …That sounds tempting.”

“I can make it more tempting,” Greg leered.

Mycroft rolled his eyes and closed the closet door. “Incorrigible,” he muttered and gave Greg a chaste kiss. “I will meet you on the sofa.”

Greg grabbed a beer for each of them and went into the drawing room to turn on the telly. He had settled on the sofa, when Mycroft came in carrying his newspapers. Taking a swig from the bottle, he eyed Mycroft and his burden warily. Sitting down on the couch, Mycroft laid out the newspapers on the coffee table. He absently rubbed his nose and sniffed. Greg tried to focus on the game.

“Gregory, no glass?” Mycroft nodded at his beer bottle.

“No, sorry, love. You want one?”

“Please.” Greg got up and went to the kitchen.

“Hih’tsh…hih’tsch…hih’TSHOO!”

“Bless you.” Greg had returned in time to witness what he expected to be the first of many sneezes. He waited while Mycroft tended his nose before handing over the glass.

“Thank you, dear.”

“No problem.” Greg plopped back down and propped his feet on the table. Mycroft shot him a look, which Greg ignored. Sighing softly, Mycroft poured his beer and took a drink.

Mycroft began sorting through The Sunday Times removing all the adverts and setting them aside. Greg would take those to Mrs. Hudson in the morning. Mycroft also discarded the front page section after glancing through the headlines.

Greg glanced over at his partner. “Are you really still reading The Sunday Times after all the trouble they caused hacking phones?” Greg asked.

“You know what they say, keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” Mycroft pulled his reading glasses from his shirt pocket settling them on his nose. He began to set aside the arts sections.

“And your boyfriends closest of all.” Greg teased, leaning over to rest his head on Mycroft’s shoulder. The only response he got was a few hitched breaths.

“Hhhnnchx, hhnnnchhx, hhnnchx.” Mycroft pressed his wrist to his nose. “Hhnnchx, hhnnchoo, Hihnn’TSH!”

Greg sat up. “Bless you, love.”

“Mmm… Thank you.” Mycroft sniffed. He was now scanning the opinion pages of the Times. “Idiots,” he muttered and the set opinion pages aside. He pulled out his phone and began an email. He paused to rub his nose and fight off a sneeze. Finishing the note, he quickly set down his phone. “Hhhnnchxx, hhnnchx.” He stifled, retreiving his handkerchief as his eyelids began to close and his breath started to hitch. Greg watched, his heart sinking.

“Hih’TSH!…Hih’TSCH!...ish,ish,ish…HIh’TSHOO! Heh’TCHOO!”

Greg, certain Mycroft’s handkerchief was now useless, got up and brought over a box of tissues. “God bless you, My. Maybe you should put the papers away.”

Mycroft wiped his nose and set aside his handkerchief. “Whatever for?” He picked up the Guardian and began the same routine he had followed with The Sunday Times.

Greg shrugged and tried to go back to watching the game. He frankly found it difficult to concentrate with Mycroft so obviously being affected. His lover’s nose had become pink and twitchy. Mycroft sniffed softly every few seconds. Greg watched from the corner of the eye as Mycroft fought off a fit pinching his nose tight. Finally, Mycroft gave in and released a few stifles into his elbow as he reached for the tissues. Greg got to the box first and pressed a handful into Mycroft’s hand.

“Hhnnchx, hhnnchx, hhnncHOO!”

“Bless you, love. Try not to stifle. You’ll get a headache.” Greg gently admonished.

Mycroft nodded. “Force of ha-hah-habit.” He bent his head into the tissues. “Heh’ETSH...Hih’TSCH…tish,tish, Heh’ETSCH! Heh…hih….Hih’TCHOO!” Mycroft sat back and sighed.

Greg was done. “That’s it.” He stated, gathering up all the discarded pages and carting them off to the kitchen to be recycled. When he came back in Mycroft was reaching for the arts and leisure sections. “Oi! Don’t touch those!” he commanded. Mycroft looked up at him and raised an eyebrow.

“Sorry,” Greg ran a hand through his silver hair not sure how to continue. “My, listen. I think the newspapers make you…” He cut himself off as Mycroft reached for the tissue box. That familiar sneezy look crossed his partner’s face. Mycroft’s eyes drifted shut, his lips parted, his long nose wrinkled and nostrils flared.

“Heh…heh’TSH! Hih’TISCHOO! Hih’TISHOO!”

“Sneeze,” he finished lamely, as the younger man continued to demonstrate Greg’s point.

Ish, ish, ish! Heht’CHOO!... Heh’ESHOO!”

“God bless you, My.” Greg sat down again.

“Apologies, Gregory. You were saying.” Mycroft carefully wiped his nose.

Greg sighed. “I believe the newspapers make you sneeze.”

Mycroft looked incredulous. “That is ridiculous.”

“Please, just listen,” Greg entreated. Mycroft nodded and took off his reading glasses. “I’ve had this suspicion for months. I’ve watched you and you sneeze three to four times more on Sunday mornings than on other mornings. The only difference I can find is the papers. This morning you didn’t read the papers. You didn’t sneeze at all until the shoe shop. At lunch you were fine. You came home and got out the newspapers. Voila! You haven’t stopped sneezing since. It’s not your seasonal allergies and you aren’t ill. It has to be the newspapers.”

Mycroft smiled at Greg like he had just done something incredibly adorable. “That is marvelously thought out and well presented. Unfortunately, I do not accept you conclusion.” Greg gaped at Mycroft. “The observation that I sneeze more on Sundays is flawed. It has not been completely substantiated. You are not present the majority of the morning during the week and as such you do not have enough data regarding my sneezing habits to support your observation that I sneeze more on Sunday mornings.” Mycroft paused. He raised a finger and plucked a few fresh tissues. “Hih’tish, hih’tish…hih’TISHOO!”

“Bless you.” Greg had a bad feeling he was not being taken seriously.

“Thank you. Now where was I? Ah, yes. Now, I agree that I did start sneezing upon our return, and coincidentally with my enjoyment of the newspapers, but I would propose that it is the lingering scent of your cinnamon rolls that has triggered my sensitive nose. That, in combination with the waning of my daily allergy medication, is a more than adequate explanation for my current state.” Mycroft picked up his glasses and put them back on.

“My rolls?” Greg huffed. “They weren’t making you sneeze this morning!”

“If you think back, I did have a bout of sneezing just before I arrived in the kitchen. But, Gregory, do not worry.” Mycroft patted his partner’s arm. “Your rolls are too divine to consider giving up for a few sneezes. Besides, you are able to make them so infrequently.”

Greg stared at Mycroft flabbergasted. “That’s a crock of shite!” He sputtered. “My rolls are not making you sneeze!”

“And neither are my newspapers!” snapped Mycroft. He turned away from Greg and picked up one of the arts sections and defiantly began reading.

Greg ground his teeth and forced himself to calm down. He took a swig of beer. He studied Mycroft’s profile and found the mulish expression on his lover’s face unsettlingly familiar. It took a few moments for Greg to realize he was more used to seeing that stubborn set of the jaw on Sherlock. The thought of telling Mycroft he looked like his brother amused Greg and a snicker escaped before it could be stopped. Mycroft cut a curious look at Greg.

“Alright, I’ve got more work to do if I am going to convince you I’m right about the newspapers. Shall we agree to disagree for now?” Greg offered.

Mycroft nodded and rubbed his nose. He looked a bit relieved. “Would you like the puzzle?” he asked. Mycroft picked up the relevant section of the paper and a pen. Greg took the paper as the olive branch that it was. Mycroft sniffed.

“Same rules?” queried Greg.

Mycroft nodded and sniffed again. He looked at his watch. “Go.”

Greg started reading over the clues and began to laugh. Mycroft looked over at Greg and raised an eyebrow. “What is so amusing, my dear?” Mycroft pulled a tissue and dabbed at his nose.

“19 down. What physicians call “sternutation.”

“Hih’tish! Heh’tish! Heht’CHOO!”

“Exactly!” Greg grinned at Mycroft, as he wiped his nose, glaring at Greg. “Aw… Bless you, darling.” Greg leaned over and kissed his partner’s cheek.

FIN???

A/N So I leave it to you, gentle readers, if you wish for me to explore this topic again with our two gentlemen. Let me know if you think it is worth my effort. I can imagine writing another story focused on the newspapers or merely keep it as an ongoing argument that crops up in other stories from time to time.

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hahahahahha oh Gregory you are such the detective.

Very cute SCW :) I just adore sneezy!Mycroft.

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Awwww... Deducing!Gregory was a delight :D it's so rare he gets to play that part.

Baking!Gregory too :D such an adorable image

Mycroft reviewed the documents and gave Anthea further instructions while Greg leveled up in Candy Crush.

HAHAHAHAHAHA he's just a nerd like the rest of us!

“Mmm …That sounds tempting.”

“I can make it more tempting,” Greg leered.

Ahh...i just adore Gregs humour!

Mycroft smiled at Greg like he had just done something incredibly adorable. “That is marvelously thought out and well presented. Unfortunately, I do not accept you conclusion.” Greg gaped at Mycroft. “The observation that I sneeze more on Sundays is flawed. It has not been completely substantiated. You are not present the majority of the morning during the week and as such you do not have enough data regarding my sneezing habits to support your observation that I sneeze more on Sunday mornings.” Mycroft paused. He raised a finger and plucked a few fresh tissues. “Hih’tish, hih’tish…hih’TISHOO!”

This argument was so Mycroft! I could easily picture Mark Gatiss saying it with that all-knowing smirk in his face.

Greg stared at Mycroft flabbergasted. “That’s a crock of shite!” He sputtered. “My rolls are not making you sneeze!”

Again, so in character! I just love :D

I personally wouldn't mind if this newspaper argument should resurface every now and again :D I like deducing!gregory and stubborn!mycroft :heart:

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Very cute SCW I just adore sneezy!Mycroft.

Thank you! And who doesn't love sneezy!Mycroft? Anyone? Yeah, I thought so. :rolleyes:


Oh, poor Mycroft. Too bad he's unable to see reason, though.

Hmm...too bad for whom? Should I assume you, Cally, would like to see more of Mycroft denying his problems with newspapers?


Awwww... Deducing!Gregory was a delight it's so rare he gets to play that part.
Baking!Gregory too such an adorable image

I'm having a thought, baking!Greg and sneezy!Mycroft...oh, that could make a lovely receipt. :doublethumbsup:


I personally wouldn't mind if this newspaper argument should resurface every now and again I like deducing!gregory and stubborn!mycroft

Okay will keep this in mind as I write more stories for these two.

Thanks for all the comments and all the views. 5K+ I'm amazed! :clapping:

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Juto of Beerpiece, on 22 Nov 2015 - 06:53 AM, said:

Awwww... Deducing!Gregory was a delight it's so rare he gets to play that part.

Baking!Gregory too such an adorable image

I'm having a thought, baking!Greg and sneezy!Mycroft...oh, that could make a lovely receipt.

:drool: yaassssssss!!!!!

Uuuughhh... I would so like to read that!!!!!!!!!

Please let him bake something extremely delicious like... Eclairs or something! And I assume as a confident DI with a flair for mixing flour and eggs, he knows that baked goods taste better if they're being created by adorable men wearing aprons only ;) hint hint :lol:

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Mycroft had a penchant for secrets, a need for control, a sweet tooth and allergies. As Greg got to know the elder Holmes better and they spent more time together socially, he realized that Mycroft was introverted and emotionally reticent; he struggled with anxiety and OCD, which sometimes led to overeating, particularly cake; practically everything made him sneeze.

LOL, cake! And yes, pretty much anything can make him sneeze!


“Gregory, I am not in the habit of counting how many times I sneeze in a day.” Mycroft sniffed and went back to his Sunday paper. “I would likely get nothing done,” he grumbled under his breath.

LOL!!!


“Hmm ...Remind me to stay abed more often.” Mycroft moved to stand closer to Greg and the rolls.

I love your turn of phrase, stay abed.


“I can make it more tempting,” Greg leered.

Mycroft rolled his eyes and closed the closet door. “Incorrigible,”

Always!


“Oi! Don’t touch those!” he commanded. Mycroft looked up at him and raised an eyebrow.

I can totally see their expressions!


Greg stared at Mycroft flabbergasted. “That’s a crock of shite!” He sputtered. “My rolls are not making you sneeze!”

“And neither are my newspapers!” snapped Mycroft. He turned away from Greg and picked up one of the arts sections and defiantly began reading.

Stubborn man!


“19 down. What physicians call “sternutation.”

“Hih’tish! Heh’tish! Heht’CHOO!”

“Exactly!” Greg grinned at Mycroft, as he wiped his nose, glaring at Greg.

Ha! Perfect! I love it!!!!

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Ha! Perfect! I love it!!!!

Thanks AngelEyes! I am happy you enjoyed deducing!Greg.


“19 down. What physicians call “sternutation.”

BTW that was an actual crossword clue, though not from the Sunday Times. That would have been too perfect. :lmfao:

Thank you everyone who reads. I love hearing from you. I likely won't post any up dates for a bit since I'm working on my SS present. But, I do have a seasonal story I wrote back in June. I will post it closer to Christmas, so stay tuned.

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