Chanel Does Drabbles (various Fandoms And Original) Updated January 31

[tenderwarrior]

These were so good! Oh my gosh. Also, this was my fave: 

"The problem was that even the best-trained service dogs were still dogs, and Derek Morgan was terribly allergic to them. So allergic indeed, that ‘tickle’ wasn’t even an accurate description of the sensation rising and falling within his sinuses with each increasingly congested inhale." 

Thank you so much for taking my request!

[Chanel_no5]

Just now, greetingsfromboston said:

These were so good! Oh my gosh. Also, this was my fave: 

"The problem was that even the best-trained service dogs were still dogs, and Derek Morgan was terribly allergic to them. So allergic indeed, that ‘tickle’ wasn’t even an accurate description of the sensation rising and falling within his sinuses with each increasingly congested inhale." 

Thank you so much for taking my request!

Aww, I'm so glad you enjoyed them! Sorry I had most focus on the ladies, but it's so much easier for me to write female sneezing.   But I'm glad you enjoyed the Morgan one a little bit extra.

Take care!

[Chanel_no5]

The idea came to me in a flash and had to be written down in a flash. I'm actually not even here right now. Seriously. I'm supposed to be asleep at the moment.

Fandom: Criminal Minds
Prompt: Blanket
Note: I can’t even… I’m sorry. If anybody wonders what happened next, the kitty in the drabble is fine, the chip only had to be scanned, and somebody at the local police station probably fell in love with him and took care of him.

 

“The probability…” Blake said, then trailed off as she was far too preoccupied with her own suffering to go on. Reid picked up the cue despite not being in any better shape himself.

“…would be about 28 %…” he said, swallowing convulsively to keep the itch in his throat at bay but having to cough a little nevertheless.

“Twenty-eight?” Blake exclaimed in a thick voice. “Sounds like a lot of percent to me.”

“Well, if you take into account the prevalence of cat allergies in the human population at large, and then add in the particular aspects of…”

“Forget I mentioned it! At least we can agree that the probability of the chip being implanted in a cat, of all creatures on Earth, and the two agents finding the cat being allergic to cats…!”

Reid put both arms protectively around the cage on his lap.

“It’s not his fault there’s a flawed gene in our genetic codes, Alex. UpktXXghh! He‘s upset enough. Lower your voice.”

Blake glared at the stray cat, that was fast asleep under the blanket they had used to catch him without getting scratched to death in addition to their mutual, ongoing allergic misery, and scoffed.

“Oh, yeah, he’s upset alright.”

But she did lower her voice. And just like Reid, she kept stifling the allergic sneezes that kept sneaking up on her, despite never stifling otherwise. She knew Reid didn’t either - while being a soft sneezer, he was normally incapable of stifling - so it was all just to avoid disturbing the furry feline in their care. Which only proved her point. In reality, they were just a bunch of softies running around with hard calibre guns and stern faces.

“By the way, isn’t that blanket from the hotel room?” she asked.

“No.” Reid looked innocent, but he could not lie. Not to her. “Maybe. Yes. It’s thicker than the one we got from the local police. Less risk of being scratched through it. You can catch nasty parasites from stray cats…”

“Yes, then.” She sighed and tapped the steering wheels with both hands. “How allergic are you?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean do you survive a detour into town to, um, pick up food and litter before we go back to the station with it?”

“Him. Not ‘it’. Him.”

And she had her answer.

Softies with hard calibre guns, Christ almighty!

***

 

[queenie]

That's adorable and I love it!

[Indescribable]

On October 20, 2016 at 6:15 PM, Cemetary_no5 said:

In reality, they were just a bunch of softies running around with hard calibre guns and stern faces.

So sweet!  Love it

[Chanel_no5]

Prompt: Pet
Fandom: Big Love
Note: I have written a similar but much longer fic on this subject before, but it wanted to be written again. And I haven't forgotten the prompt you gave me, SCW, I just haven't decided on a scenario yet.

 

“Margene!” Nicki called out. “I’ve been looking for y-… what’s that thing doing here?”

Margene sighed and closed the cage she had been fussing over.

“It’s not a ‘thing’, it’s a rabbit.”

Nicki shook her head.

“Oh, you are in so much trouble,” she said, sounding very pleased with this fact.

“What? Why?” Margene asked. “It wasn’t expensive and I’m going to take care of it myself.”

“You don’t think adding a pet to the family is something that needs to be brought up for discussion?”

“No, not if it doesn’t cost either of you guys any money, time or effort,” Margene replied. “He’s going to live in a cage in my house, I can’t see why I can’t make that decision on my own.”

“Ohh, talk to Boss Lady about it and you’ll hear why,” Nicki said.

“You know I don’t like it when you call me that,” Barb’s voice came from the doorway. “Talk to me about what?”

She stepped inside the room, absent-mindedly rubbing her nose.

Margene sighed and rolled her eyes.

“It’s nothing Barb, really. Just…”

Barb held up one finger to halt the younger wife while turning to the side and raised her other hand up to her face to catch a wet sneeze.

“HaISSCHhew! Sorry. What?”

Nicki crossed her arms and scowled at Margene.

“Tell her.”

Margene glared at Nicki and then turned back to Barb, who looked confused and impatient. And like she was about to sneeze again.

“Jesus H. Christ, I bought a rabbit and now Nicki thinks we should have had a vote on letting it into the family or something!” Margene said. Nearly shouted, in fact. Barb looked past her and saw the cage for the first time. She winced.

“Come outside with me so we can talk,” she told Margene.

“Why?”

“Because I can’t stay in here or I’ll sneeze my head off in a couple of minutes,” Barb snapped and walked out of the room, not waiting for Margene to follow suit. Nicki nodded.

“Boss Lady’s allergic.”

Margene stared at her for a couple of seconds, speechless, then turned and stomped out to where Barb was waiting for her.

“We’ve been married for two years and I don’t know that you’re allergic to furry animals?! What else is there that I should know and don’t, apart from everything about being a mother and wife!?”

Barb was almost comically surprised by this emotional outburst.

“Calm down,” was the only thing she could think of saying. That helped about as much as it usually helped when someone said it to her - not at all.

“Why is it that every time I do something, it’s wrong?!” Margene shouted, and then burst into tears. Barb, still surprised, reached out and pulled Margene in for a hug, hoping the younger woman hadn’t cuddled the rabbit recently, or Barb was in for an unpleasant stroll down Allergy Attack Avenue.

“I honestly thought you knew,” she said. “Either way, it’s a clue that the only pet we have is the creepy lizard that Teeny keeps.”

“I was supposed to get that?” Margene hiccupped. “It’s Teeny we’re talking about. It wouldn’t be surprising if she had a… a…”

In her upset condition Margene couldn’t think of anything so she just sobbed instead. Barb stroke her back and made eye contact with Nicki over Margene’s shoulder. Nicki rolled her eyes. Barb shook her head warningly and kept stroking Margene’s back, even as she felt the need to sneeze creep up on her again. Great. She held it back and the urge seemed to subside, but just as she exhaled in relief, it returned, giving her no time to cover or even turn away.

“Nkktthh! NktXxth!”

She stifled against Margene’s shoulder, grateful that the sneezes at least allowed to be stifled.

“’scuse me,” she said, her voice definitely sounding thicker. “I have to let go of you Margie, you have fur all over you and I… aah…”

She took a step away from Margene and sneezed again.

“HaIISSCHHHuuh! I am so allergic.”

“I’m sorry,” Margene said, still with tears streaming down her face. “I’ll take it back to the store right away.”

“Thank you,” Barb said and somehow managed to smile in spite of the itch that spread like a wildfire throughout her sinuses.

When Margene went back to her house, Nicki walked up to Barb, scowling.

“Why didn’t you tell her off? She’s so selfish!”

“Nicki, she really didn’t know,” Barb said, sneezed yet again, and sighed.

This was going to be a long, and itchy, afternoon.

 

[matilda3948]

I've been so terrible with comments (sorry). I just love your CM drabbles. Even if they've managed to ruin the show, you remain brilliant  

[Chanel_no5]

Prompt: Sympathy
Fandom: None, original.
Note: Sequel to this story

 

***

“Rise and shine,” someone said, piercing the blessed fever-fuzzy sleep. Angela groaned and turned away from the voice, curling into her own chest to let out a wet, congested sneeze.

“NngtSSHHhghh!”

“Bless you. It’s ten am. I’ve fed the pets and I think you should eat something too.”

“Leave be alode,” Angela sniffled, her voice muffled by her own body. “I think I’b dying.”

The housekeeper rolled her eyes.

“Miss K, you have a cold. Not a manmade virus designed to kill humanity, like the ones that horrible doctor lady you play on TV keeps running into. Keep the drama to the screen, will you?”

Angela rolled over on her stomach and glared at her housekeeper, who looked back with complete calm. Little by little Angela began to feel embarrassed about her childish, entitled behaviour, and she looked away.

“Sorry. You’re right.”

“Of course I am,” her employee said and tugged at the blanket. “Get up from there. You’ll feel better once you’ve had a shower and some breakfast.”

“I don’t want to get up,” Angela complained, pulled the blanket out of Mary’s grip, and coughed into her own shoulder.

“Well, I’m not cleaning up here until you get out of my way, so there’s your motivation.”

Angela reluctantly got up from her makeshift sleeping arrangement and rubbed her aching neck.

“You’re not exactly brimming with sympathy, are you?”

“You have to pay me extra for that,” Mary deadpanned, but she smiled. Angela shook her head, but she too was smiling.

“I keep wondering why I hired you.”

“Because I don’t suck up to you just because you’ve got a couple of Golden Globes to brag about, that’s why. You’d have a head the size of Texas if I didn’t shove you around a bit now and then.”

“You’re right.” Angela just had time to get her arm up in front of her face to catch another messy sneeze. “EgnnTTSSHHkk!”

“Bless you. Get going.”

Angela sniffled again. Her nose felt raw and battered.

“If I give you the afternoon off with pay, will you pity me at least a little bit?”

Mary laughed heartily and winked at her.

“I’ll think about it.”

[Chanel_no5]

@matilda3948 Criminal Minds galore...?  

I decided to make a sweep and write a whole bunch of drabbles to get past the whole “staring at the screen not knowing where to start with rewriting all the lost works”-syndrome. Smart? I don’t know. But it is more productive than just staring, right? Also, I'm really sorry if the formatting is wonky, this laptop has tics.

Prompt: Surprise
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: Kicking off with a sneezer I haven't written before.

***

”Ngtt! Ngtxkk!”

Four heads turned at the sound of the quietly stifled double. Only Hotch didn’t look up from the case file he was reading.

“Bless you,” he simply said, and flipped over to the next page, his frown deepening as he looked at the crime scene photos.

The rest of the team wasn’t quite over this surprise yet, however.

“What was that?” Emily said and laughed out loud. “Do you seriously sneeze like that?”

She was ignored, which only made her laugh even more.

“Rossi!”

The Italian sighed.

“Yes, that’s how I sneeze.”

“I’ve never heard you sneeze before,” JJ said, grinning.

“You've never heard it before because I sneeze like that. Is there any possibility we can focus on the case now? We land in less than an hour.”

“You know, you really shouldn’t be stifling your sneezes…” Reid began. Rossi gave him the evil eye and Reid changed direction mid-breath: “Right, so there are some interesting clues at the abduction sites…”

***

Prompt: Peppermint
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: Another character I don’t think I’ve written before… wait, yes, I have.

 

“Hotch, did you notice anything off about Strauss today?” Morgan asked. His boss nodded, his face not betraying his thoughts for a moment.

“She is sluggish, flushed and her eyes are red.”

“And she smells of peppermint. A lot. Hotch, do you think she’s drinking again?”

“I don’t know,” Hotch said. “But I’m going to find out.”

He left Morgan and entered Strauss’s office discreetly, but without knocking.

“Ma’am?” he said, but that was all he could say. Strauss looked like crap, but she was definitely not drunk. She kept a tissue clasped over her mouth and nose and stifled sneeze after sneeze into it. Once she could catch her breath again she glared at him, but without lowering the tissue.

“What?” she hissed into the paper. Hotch eyed her desk, which was covered in crumpled tissues and cough mints wrappers, and he didn’t need to be a profiler to close this case.

“I know you’re my superior, so I can’t give you orders, but I can suggest that you go home,” Hotch said. Strauss got a defiant look in her eyes for a moment, but it was almost immediately pushed aside by the pre-sneeze look.

“HaaptSSHew!”

“Bless you.”

She blew her nose softly and sighed.

“Thank you, Aaron. I will take your suggestion under consideration. Now get out before you catch it.”

Hotch didn’t argue.

He went down the hall to Morgan’s office and shook his head.

“The only thing she’s been drinking is cold medicine, and it’s not working very well either.”

***

Prompt: Adoption
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: I almost never write Hotch either, but I was going to try and include as many characters as possible in this drabble binge, plus this little scene just popped up in my mind, so here you go.  

 

“Ah-umpTSCHH! HuhtSSHHmpf!”

Hotch muffled two itchy sneezes into his handkerchief and rubbed his inflamed, sore nose through the fabric. His eyes were so swollen he could barely see through them, and they were burning.

Rossi knocked on the door and walked right on in, taking a long good look at this mess that was his old friend. Hotch shook his head a little as if to warn him not to say it, but Rossi wasn’t in the habit of avoiding difficult subjects.

“Isn’t it about time you admit that kitten adoption was a mistake?” he asked calmly. “I know it made Jack happy and you want him to be happy, but this…”

“HUUURRSSSHHHUH!”

“…this is not working out, and you know it. You’re in the office, nowhere near that furball, and still suffering like that.”

“Jack would be devastated,” Hotch said thickly and blew his nose into the almost spent handkerchief.

“If I told you I have found someone who will happily take Spot in, and who’s going to let Jack come over and play with him as much as he wants, would you consider it?”

“Jack wouldn’t give Spot up to just anyone,” Hotch replied and sprayed another harsh, tickly sneeze into the soaked fabric. He groaned. This had been going on for over a week, and the over-the-counter meds barely did anything to keep up.

“Not anyone, I’m sure. But Penelope Garcia is not just anyone.”

Hotch considered this for a moment. Eventually his nose made the decision for him. He could not go on like this much longer, or he’d go crazy.

“You’re right. I’ll go talk to her.”

“No need to, she’s right here,” Rossi said and stepped aside to let Garcia in.

***

Prompt: Autumn (fall)
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: While I have a feeling denial would be universal among the BAU, Prentiss would probably be one of the more stubborn ones.

 

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just admit it?” JJ asked as she handed Emily another tissue.

“Admi-hihh-iSSCHoo! Admit to what?” Emily replied, wiping at her chafed, rose-red nostrils for the hundredth time today. The fluttering tickle would not let up for a moment and she could barely keep her hands off her nose at all, but there was no way she would stop denying what was really going on.  

“Apparently not,” JJ sighed and turned towards her colleague and friend. “Em, I’ve never seen anyone with more obvious allergies, it’s not like you can hide them. You’ve been going on like this since this morning.”

“I’m not allergic,” Emily muttered. “It’s October, nobody’s allergic in fall.”

“A lot of people are, including you,” JJ replied. “I can get you some antihistamines if you want.”

“I’b fide. EeSSCHhoo! KtSSCHhoo! HehIISSSHH!”

JJ rolled her eyes.

“You’re so not ‘fide’. But suit yourself.”

Emily was silent for a while, except for the incessant sniffling that she simply couldn’t help. Eventually she said;

“Okay, maybe I’m a bit allergic. A little bit. Maybe.”

JJ smiled and gestured to the glove compartment.

“There’s Benadryl in there.”

“Oh, you’re a lifesaver! I owe you one.”

JJ’s smile got broader.

“Yes, you do.”

***

 

Prompt: Yawn
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: Involuntary reaction as involuntary reaction? Maaaybe not quite.

 

“HuuuESSHHH!”

“Twenty-four.”

“EeeSSCHHew!”

“Twenty-five.”

Reid glared at Morgan.

“You’re having way too much fun with this,” he groaned, his voice thick with congestion. “Hehh… ehhh…”

Morgan chuckled as the younger man sniffled and hitched, trying to get the next sneeze to decide whether to come out or stay back.

“Well, I told you that you should have been prepared with an antihistamine before we went into that greenhouse…”

“AaaEEPPTSSSHHHH!” This sneeze alone was wet enough to render the tissue completely useless, and Reid leaned back, out of breath. 

“Twenty-six. But no, you said you’d be fine. So you only have yourself to blame, kid.”

Morgan chuckled again and turned his gaze back to the road.

“You still have way too much fun,” Reid grunted and rubbed his nose furiously.

“Yeah, maybe I-“

Reid interrupted him with a sharp inhale.

“Twenty-seven,” Morgan said in advance, but instead of sneezing, Reid yawned.

“You were saying?” he asked as he had finished yawning.

“That still counts.”

“It wasn’t a sneeze!”

“But it was still an involuntary reaction.”  

 

***

Prompt: Severe
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: As if Morgan would get out of this clear.

 

“I thought you said you were ‘mildly’ allergic to dogs,” Hotch said. Morgan shook his head, trying to catch his breath enough between the wrenching sneezing fits to get an answer out, but eventually had to give in and just bury his itchy, tingly, streaming nose in another handful of tissues and concentrate on getting the sneezes out.

“ErrrSSHHHUH! HEEESSSHHHUH! HUUUEERRSSSHHH! Uh… huhhAAEESSSCHHH!”

“This is not mild, Morgan,” Hotch continued. “This is not even moderate. This is severe.”

“I… huh… ueEESSCHHHoo! I’ll be f-fihhh… AERRSSHHH! Fide. HuuAARRSSSHHHUUH!”

Hotch sighed.

“Why are everyone on this team so stubborn?”

“Because you’re a bad influence,” Rossi said from behind him. “Have you gotten any Benadryl into him?”

“Five minutes ago, it’s not working yet.”

Rossi gave him a very neutral look.

“I can see that, Aaron.”

***

 

Prompt: Breathe
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: Know that episode in season 9 where Blake almost drowns? This is right after that event, the scene where they’re back at the station.

 

“How are you doing?” JJ repeats, and Blake struggles to keep herself in control – the panic attack she had suffered at the site was more uncontrolled than she ever wanted to seem in front of the team, and it’s never going to happen again – but she can’t play it cool.

“It’s just that I couldn’t breathe,” she says, and to her horror she realises she’s almost sobbing the words. JJ puts an arm around her shoulder.

“We put thirty bullets into that water.”

“Okay,” she whispers.

“He’s dead, Alex. He’s dead.”

JJ begins to lead her away from the others, sensing that her colleague might be near another panic attack and knowing that the last thing Blake would like is for it to be on public display. Blake’s shoulder is so tense it’s like trying to give comfort to a rock, but the very next moment JJ realises it’s because her colleague is trying to hold back more than tears. They only make it into the next room when Blake cups her hands over her mouth and bobs forward with an exhausted triple.

“HeeSSCHHew! EeIISSCHHew! Uh… huh-aeeSSSHHH!”

She sniffles and blushes so fiercely JJ wonders if she’s simply going to self-combust at the spot.

“Bless you.”

“It’s not a cold,” Blake snaps as if JJ had been trying to cold-shame her.

“Maybe not, but you might catch one after being in that cold water.”

“You don’t catch colds from being cold or wet, it’s a viral inf-infection…” Blake argues, but before she can say anything more on the subject she bends over and sneezes again, into her sleeve this time. “AeeeSSSHHH! HAH-iSSSHHoo!”

“I hear Spencer is rubbing off on you. But he could tell you that while you don’t catch colds from being cold, it can trigger a pre-existing infection. Don’t look at me like that, he told me that when I came down with a cold after examining a dump site in the pouring rain a couple of years ago. And you were in those wet clothes for quite a while.”

“Where are we going?” Blake asks, realising that JJ leads her towards the exit.

“I’m taking you back to the hotel.”

Blake opens her mouth to object, but all that comes out is yet another sneeze. And her throat is starting to hurt too. So she shuts up and allow JJ to take charge.

***

 

Prompt: Solace
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: It only seemed logical to go there, so I did.

 

The solace that JJ had offered her colleague a couple of days ago had paid off in two ways. One positive and one negative. The positive was that Blake generally seemed to have lowered her shields around the team – at least around JJ. The negative was the budding head cold JJ had gotten from her, which thankfully at least had kept in check until they had wrapped up the case and were on the plane heading home.

Blake – whose cold wasn’t budding, it was in full bloom – was madly embarrassed about passing it on, which JJ didn’t quite understand.  It was just a cold. With a kid in day-care age at home, she wasn’t exactly a stranger to that, or even more unpleasant things.

That didn’t mean it wasn’t annoying, this rawness in her throat, the light tickle that kept wanting to turn into a cough, the runny nose, and…

“EptSCHew! Ugh. Hehhh… eiSSSCHew!”

And the sneezing.

She pinched her nose and stifled the next sneeze, but that only seemed to make things worse. It immediately made her so stuffy she almost felt light-headed. She hoped she didn’t look as lousy as she felt, but she wasn’t counting on it. Her fair complexion made puffiness and redness around the nostrils very, very visible.

“Are you guys okay?” Hotch asked. Blake sat turned towards the window, hiding her face with one hand, breathing raspy breaths through her mouth. She looked like death warmed over, but nodded in response. Hotch’s eyes lingered for a moment, then moved on to JJ.

“Yeah,” she said, immediately regretting trying to speak as the vibrations from her vocal cords seemed to set off a chain reaction in her congested sinuses. It wasn’t so much a tickle as it was a burning sensation, and it didn’t matter how determined she was not to sneeze while Hotch stared straight at her, she couldn’t help it. She snapped forward and bent over so that she sneezed onto her own lap.

“AAAIISSSCHHHew!”

When she straightened, she could have sworn there was a hint of a smile on Hotch’s stern face, but before she could be sure, he had turned around to walk back to his own seat.

***

 

Prompt: Isolation
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: Garcia is another character I have rarely written, so why not?

 

Sometimes Garcia was immensely grateful for her relative isolation in her computer room, and by ‘sometimes’ she meant springtime. It wasn’t that she hated spring, but she hated what it did to her. It seemed it didn’t matter how many medications she stuffed herself with, it still only took the edge off her allergies. It was bad enough having to sneeze a gazillion times per second, but if she would have to be around people when it happened she’d be mortified.

“Ugh, here we go again,” she muttered and turned away from the screen, aiming the sneezes into her scarf as she didn’t have time to reach for the box of tissues.

“Issshh! KtISSHH! Tssschew! HEPtSSHHiew! Heh… ptSSCHoo! Eww,” she whined as she lowered the scarf and saw the mess she had left on it.

Once more sending a grateful thought that she wasn’t the one working on the field, she turned back to the computer and forced herself to focus on her work rather than the question when she would sneeze next and how many times in a row it would be.

She was so ready for spring to be over.

 

[matilda3948]

Wow. You were binging. I love it! Hotch allergic to a kitten is too adorable and the one with Rossi was adorable.

[Chanel_no5]

Thank you, m'dear! I got the first two done and then thought "ah, what the hell, let's keep going".  

 

Prompt: Morning
Fandom: Big Love
Note: One of my favourite scenarios with one of my favourite characters. I decided to treat myself today, because I friggin’ can’t focus on anything that requires a lot of effort at the moment!

 

Barb is sitting on the edge of her bed, pinching her nose as hard as she can. These morning sneezing fits are by far the worst part about her hayfever. The itch is like a constant stream of fire flowing from between her eyes down to the very tip of her nose. Bill is still asleep next to her and she’s trying with all her might not to wake him, but...

“EeeIIISSSCHHHAAH!”

Bill almost falls out of bed.

“For Pete’s sake…!”

“I can’t help it,” Barb snaps before sneezing again. Bill sighs, stroking her back.

“I know honey. Bless you.”

***

Prompt: No prompt, but I’m too lazy to put it into my promptless drabble thread, so…
Fandom: CSI: New York
Note: Another treat to myself, because, you know...

 

Mac chuckled a little.

 “What are you doing, Jo?”

“I believe it’s called sneezing,” the brunette answered, took a quick breath and then sneezed again, shaking her head. “Argh. I have been at it since the clothes from the choking victim came in, so I can determine one thing for certain without even waiting for the test results.”

She turned away and sneezed into her sleeve, sniffled and sneezed again. The necklaces she wore rattled against each other with each time she bobbed forward.

“Bless you. And what is that?”

“He was definitely around horses.”

“That narrows it down.”

“YeahIISSHHuh!”

 ***

 

[tenderwarrior]

So cute! I also really loved the Jotch/cat adoption drabble. Also, horse allergies are great

[Subtly Clashing Wishes]

On November 9, 2016 at 5:25 PM, Chanel_no5 said:

Bill is still asleep next to her and she’s trying with all her might not to wake him, but...

“EeeIIISSSCHHHAAH!”

Bill almost falls out of bed.

“For Pete’s sake…!”

“I can’t help it,” Barb snaps before sneezing again.

That's Brilliant!

[Chanel_no5]

Thank you guys!  

 

Fandom: Big Love
Prompt: Open window
Note: I’m trying to actually do 100 words for these. That’s effing hard when you’re used to babble on!  

 

“Nicki, could you please roll up the window?” Barb asked.

“But the car is so hot, I’m melting,” Nicki objected.

“Yeah, I know, I’m hot too, but the pollen count… hah-ikTSSHhew!”

“Oh, here we go again,” Nicki said, rolling her eyes.

“I’m not in the mood to argue,” Barb said. “Please just close the window.”

“But it’s hot!” Nicki repeated.

“Well, you’ll either have to live with that, or you’re gonna have to listen to me sneezing for the rest of the drive, it’s your choice,” Barb bit back. Nicki pondered this for a few seconds, then closed the window.

***

Fandom: X-files
Prompt: Haunted
Note: Back in the day I was badass at writing horror. Now the closest I get is hinting at characters being in a haunted house. Sad development, really. ^^

 

“Come on Scully, are you telling me you can’t feel the presence of ghosts here?” Mulder asked and turned his flashlight towards his colleague. Scully sighed.

“There are no ghosts, Mulder. It’s just an old, abandoned house, probably with a sad backstory that you’re going to fill me in on soon, but that is all it is,” she replied. Mulder didn’t even seem to listen, as he was busy looking around. Scully, already bothered by the dust, was hit with a desperate urge to sneeze.

 “HepTSSHHew! Ugh, the only thing haunted here is my nose, let’s get out of here!”

 

 

[tenderwarrior]

Loved it!! 

[Subtly Clashing Wishes]

If I was Nicki in the first one there is no choice. Stay comfortable and listen to Barb sneeze? The decision is clear. 

[Chanel_no5]

On ‎2016‎-‎12‎-‎11 at 7:09 PM, greetingsfromboston said:

Loved it!! 

Thank you!

On ‎2016‎-‎12‎-‎14 at 0:33 PM, Sanguine Cheerful Worrier said:

If I was Nicki in the first one there is no choice. Stay comfortable and listen to Barb sneeze? The decision is clear. 

Couldn't agree with you more.  Although I suspect I might have a problem concentrating on driving... ^^

 

Fandom: Big Love
Prompt: headache
Note: Yeah, I know, I’m not cutting Barb much slack. But then again… since there was no sneezing in the show, I need to overcompensate for that unfortunate lack. Also, I apparently can't stick to 100 words any longer.  

 

Barb stepped out of the shower and swept the towel around her, feeling all the tension leaving her after the brunt of hot, almost scalding water. She almost wished she hadn’t relaxed quite that much. The headache that had been sneaking up on her since early afternoon felt like it had the potential of flourishing into a full-scale migraine.

Also, she still felt the aftermath of the random allergy attack she had suffered right after coming home from work. It was definitely allergies, rapid-fire fits always were, but she wasn’t sure what had set her off. It was a bit too early for her pollen allergy.

She would have thought she was all sneezed-out after all that raw, violent fit, but the tickle had apparently decided to return for a brief encore. And given how much her head ached, the slightest attempt to stifle, hold back or restrain it would probably give that migraine the excuse it needed to push forward. Great.

Holding the towel in place with one hand, she started raising the other up to her face to cover the sneeze, and stopped the movement halfway when she realised how pointless the gesture was when she was completely by herself.

Her breath caught in her throat and her eyes closed. Her nostrils, still battered and irritated from the earlier sneezing fit, flared as she struggled with the teasing, breathless build-up. Eventually she snapped forward with a completely uninhibited, scraping

“HaaEESSSHHUH!”

The spray from the outburst created another cloud of mist in the already fogged-up bathroom.

“Ow,” she groaned as a bolt of pain shot through her head. Oh yeah, this would be nasty.

“Bless you mom,” Sarah called from her room across the hallway. Barb didn’t reply. She kept her eyes shut and wore a look of anguish on her face.

Migraines and hayfever. If it hadn’t been blasphemy to think like that, she’d say those two were plagues of biblical proportions.

She opened the cabinet and took out the Aspirin and the Benadryl, paused to consider, and then reached for the Ambien as well. Maybe that way she’d sleep right through the misery. 

***

Fandom: Criminal Minds
Prompt: Holiday
Note: Irritable BAU team, because I felt like it.

 

The BAU had been promised Christmas and New Year’s off, regardless of what case might come in over the holidays. Strauss knew they had been working themselves more than half-way to death lately and the moral, even among these morally superior people, was at an all-time low. They were quarrelling. Snapping and glaring at each other for no reason. Getting on each other’s nerves. The small personal quirks they normally accepted in each other had turned into huge annoyances. It didn’t help that they all recognised this as signs of long-time stress, they were still human beings and therefore affected by it.

“I swear to God, Spence, if you don’t stop sniffling I might be arrested for shooting a colleague…” JJ said in an uncharacteristically testy voice.

“UekkTSSHHuh! I can’t help it, I have a cold,” Reid replied, sounding miserable and exasperated.

“Everybody knows. You inform us about the progress of this cold every ten minutes or so,” Blake said. Reid glared at her.

“If Morgan had taken a sick day I wouldn’t have caught it.”

“Oh no kid, you did not catch that from me, I was sick over a month ago!” Morgan objected. Reid was about to respond when instead, he sneezed again, seemingly unprepared that it was even coming.

“HuhESShhuh!”

“Hey!” Blake said, pulling away from the spray zone. “Tissues. Good invention. I’m just sayin’.”

“Yeah, please blow your nose, or better yet, go home and take a sick day yourself,” JJ sighed.

“Then I’d be ruining my perfect record of no sick days in a full year,” Reid sniffled. “It messes up the statistics.”

Strauss had been standing in the doorway to her office, listening to the squabble for several minutes, and now she shook her head and went into Hotch’s office without knocking.

“Aaron, send your team home before they rip each other to pieces. And then go home yourself. This is unproductive.”

Hotch nodded, not allowing Strauss to see how relieved he was, but maybe she could sense it either way, because she smiled.

“Happy holidays,” she said.

“You too,” he replied, and got up from his chair to go against his policies and reward the team for bad behaviour.

 

 

[Subtly Clashing Wishes]

11 hours ago, Chanel_no5 said:

She opened the cabinet and took out the Aspirin and the Benadryl, paused to consider, and then reached for the Ambien as well.

No maybe about it. Barb will sleep.  

[Chanel_no5]

16 hours ago, Sanguine Cheerful Worrier said:

No maybe about it. Barb will sleep.  

She has probably deserved it, too.  

I ran out of my Ambien yesternight. So I won't sleep. Which I probably deserve, as well.  

[HPG]

Hello!  I love Yawn, and Blanket.  Blanket was so sweet, and I could easily see Yawn happening.  Plus, counting sneezes is SO cute.

[Chanel_no5]

Thank you!  

Now for something different, well, at least a little bit.  Maybe.

Prompt: Science
Fandom: original
Note: Same OC as used in this fic, only with allergies this time. And a bit more laidback attitude.

 

“You guys ready?” the director asked. The actors preparing for the scene nodded. He eyed the leading lady for a moment. “You’re not holding back, are you?”

Angela tried to look innocent, but her eyes watered with the itchy sneezes she tried to push back.

“Don’t. Each day you’ve had a sneezing fit when we start, the filming has gone great. The days you’ve been off set, or haven’t sneezed, basically everything has gone wrong.”

Angela wanted to reply, but there was no way she could fight back the increasing need to sneeze, and her breath hitched as she looked around for something to catch the allergy fit into. As if summoned by the very thought, her assistant handed her a couple of tissues right before she reached the point of inevitability.

“Eehh… EISSHH! EhISSHhew! HaKTISSHhoo! Heh… ahhh… ayISSHHyew!”

She was still for a moment, making sure her nose had calmed down, but it seemed to be out of tricks, at least for the time being. She lowered the tissue and said: “I’m not sure your theory holds much scientific value, Howie.”

 “Screw science, this is Hollywood! It’s built on magic and superstition!” Howie exclaimed, clasped his hands together and turned to the rest of the crew. “Everybody find their marks! Let’s film the shit out of this scene!”

Angela gave her co-star Chris an enquiring look. He shrugged.

“It’s the only pyro in the entire movie. Howie has geared up for this since he got the screenplay. Are you ready for the fireworks, Officer Sneezy?”

“Don’t mock the one with the magic nose,” Angela shot back, but she was laughing. After adjusting the police uniform she wore and taking another trying breath through her nose to make sure it was done with its silliness, she eventually nodded. “Yeah, Officer Sneezy is ready. And she makes a personal note that nobody bothered blessing her.”

“Old superstition.” Chris’s glittering eyes told her he was messing with her. Everybody knew she didn't like being blessed anyway.

“Speaking of superstitions... I’ll just hold back my sneezes tomorrow, then,” she said. “As a scientific experiment."

***

Prompt: Health
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Note: Because I like those two interacting, plus I think this scene would have been oddly plausible.  

 

“What are you doing, Reid?” Blake asked. Reid jumped a little at the sound of her voice.

“Nothing, what, why are you here?”

“I happen to work here,” she said, looking past him at what he was trying to hide. “What’s that? Whoa! It smells like toothpaste.”

“Yeah, uh, it’s… supposed to clear out the sinuses, and I’ve been getting sinus headaches since I had the flu a couple of months ago.”

“Okay. Wow, the fumes alone would clear out the sinuses of anyone in the entire room,” she said and looked dismayed when Reid proceeded to sniff some of the mint-smelling powder. “That seems a bit like overkill, though.”

Reid’s nostrils flared to their full extent. His eyes watered as they closed, allowing a light trickle of tears to run down his cheeks. He took several airy breaths before snapping forward with a violent and messy rapid fit into a waiting Kleenex.

“AAESHHH! AESCHhhuh! HahtSSHHUH! TSHHUhhah! AhheRRSSHHHuh! HuptSSHHHuh!”

Blake crossed her arms while she waited for the fit to taper off.  

“Well, I get sinus headaches too, but I don’t know, I think I’ll stick to hot steam to clear things up.”

“This is… huhhrrSSHHHuh! Much more efficient,” Reid said in a half-choked voice and went on to empty the content of his assaulted nose into tissue after tissue.

“Yeah… I can see that. I doubt the health benefits are so great if you sneeze yourself to a whiplash injury, however.”

 

[Subtly Clashing Wishes]

On January 4, 2017 at 0:18 PM, Chanel_no5 said:

“Don’t mock the one with the magic nose,”

 

Never, never. I wouldn't dare.

Witty and fun as ever Chanel.  

[tenderwarrior]

I love your drabbles! I can't wait to see what's next.

[Chanel_no5]

Aww, thank you so much, you guys!!  I'm so glad you like them!

 

Prompt: Date
Fandom: Big Love
Note: This scene got in my head like "why didn't that happen on the show?! It would have worked perfectly!"  

 

A cloud of cologne heralded her son’s imminent arrival down the stairs. Barb scrunched up her nose and waved a hand in the air.

“Oh my goodness Benny, did you bathe in that stuff?”

“Is it too much?” he asked, sounding surprised. Nicki looked up from the salad she was preparing.

“Too much? Not if you provide her with a gas mask,” she scoffed. “Right, Barb?”

Barb couldn’t reply with words; she was under attack by a strong allergic itch. She could only nod in agreement before she inhaled sharply and doubled over with a brutal, breathless sneeze.

“AaaIIISSSHHHew!” She straightened and tried to speak, but was immediately conquered by another sneeze. “HaaaIIISSSHHHHIEW! Oh my-hahh… haIIISSSHHHH! Go b-bahh-hahhAAkTSSHhh-back upstairs and wa-ohSSHHHeww!.. wash that off you!”

Nicki sighed dramatically and rolled her eyes.

“Thank you so much, Ben. You know how she gets once she starts; now she'll be at it all night!”

“Sorry,” he muttered and shuffled back upstairs.

Meanwhile, Barb tried desperately to stop sneezing, but her attempts at suppressing the ticklish outbursts only seemed to make the urge grow in intensity. Nicki watched her with a scowl on her face for a few seconds before speaking.

“Go.”

“I… hhmpTSHHh! NktSHhh! HayIISSHHhuh! HaikTSSHHh!”

She pressed her cupped hands against her mouth trying to contain the spray, but not doing a very good job of it.

”Go,” Nicki repeated, sounding impatient. ”Get out of here, or you’ll never stop. That smell is going to linger all evening.”

As Barb surrendered to the facts and slipped out through the glass doors, Nicki shook her head and muttered under her breath;

“I swear, teenage boys and first dates..!”

 

[Anonymouse]

Ahhhh yesss!  Nicki including Barb on the gas mask joke (which made me lol) for once only to immediately return to her default state of resenting her and the fact that she'll be sneezing all night thanks to Ben's stupid cologne and boss lady's stupid nose. I love the harsh desperation of her sneezes and how Nicki commands her to gtfo at the end. Can't tell if she just doesn't want to deal with it or if she is genuinely concerned for Barb... maybe a bit of both?