I Hunger Only For You (Into the Wild With Me) -Chapters 16/16

[ichixshiro14]

On 10/2/2023 at 8:12 AM, dwaekki said:

Aaah the happiness is everything! I'm so glad you took this route with the plot and let these 2 love each other peacefully! I also loved seeing both of the characters sneeze in one chapter hahaha, I can't wait to read more! ❤️

I second this on all accounts!! Wow, what an amazing chapter!!! 🤯🤯🤯

[Lily]

I'm definetely melting right now. They're the cutest here. 💙

Love how they are so communicative, sweet to each other, I can't right now 😭 I wish all love stories could have this depth. And the sneezing ?? Amazing, you're the best. ❤️

[dwaekki]

I hope you write more soon, you can't leave these 2 amazing characters behind 😭❤️

[Catsgotyourtounge]

The amount of times I have re read this one is well.... a lot to say the least ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[Privatedancer]

Struggling to master the finer virtue of patience;). Luckily I can read and re-read my favorite parts and always gain something new from my reading. Today I caught myself let out an audible whimper in a very public place over this phenomenal section:

You’re not wrong though, I am—I’m not the same. I—“

“I’m going to stop you right there sweetheart. We’re both different how could we not be after what happened? But as your partner, as your mate it’s my job to love you through your evolution. My love, our love is transcendent. I love you because I just do, no amount of circumstances is going to change that. I don't regret choosing you. It doesn't matter what universe, what reality we're living, I'm always going to choose you. Your mine Jam and I’m yours those are the facts and that’s all we need, everything else we’ll figure out.”
 

I enjoy the care taking, the hurt-comfort, the intense love and genuine acceptance as much, maybe even more, than the sneezing.

[Not Telling]

 @Privatedancer❤️ I'm so glad that you enjoyed the last chapter, I do love a good slow burn. When things finally happen it always feels that much more visceral and powerful. I'm also glad that your favorite parts have been keeping you at least somewhat fulfilled whilst you wait endlessly on me to get my act in gear. 😅 I am sorry that I've had to be your lesson in patience. Haha

@dwaekki @ichixshiro14 I am glad as well that I found a way to write Jamie out of prison sooner than I had originally planned as well. It's better this way. Thank you both for your comments and I'm so glad that the last chapter was good for you.

@thesneezyowl ❤️ Awwww you're so sweet thank you! I have a soft spot for Jamie and River and it warms my heart that other people cherish them as much as I do. 

@Catsgotyourtounge Thank you so much! Seeing your excitement and enthusiasm in your comment brings a smile to my face. I'm so glad that you've been enjoying. Hopefully the re-reads have made my lack of update in so long at least a little bit easier to tolerate. Haha

@Wirescrossed It can definitely be difficult to balance a fully flushed out story while also incorporating the kink into it. With this one I am attached to the story and the characters to the extent that I would like to take it more public but the fetishy bits are so integral to the plot that I'm not sure I could make it work as a non-fetish story or that it would even appeal to an audience outside of this forum haha but at least there are people like you here that appreciate it. Thank you for the nice compliment! ❤️ 

@Lily I have read your comment twice now, once when I got it and now to determine how to adequately respond and both times have me blushing so hard. You are too kind thank you for such nice evaluation and sweet words. ❤️ 

Thank you everyone for all the kindness, love, and wonderful reception you've given to this story and for all the confidence boosters you've given me each time you comment. Jamie and River are special and I'm so glad that I've had this space to share them. ❤️ 

______________________________________________

Hi lovelies. I hope that everyone is well! After a longer than intended hiatus I am finally back!

I was looking at the post date of my last chapter and I can't believe it's been that long and I hate that it has been that long. I guess one of the pitfalls of posting a story in real time. Priorities shifted and writing took a bit of a back seat and admittedly the creative inspiration specific for this story has been a bit sparse and when it did come I didn't like the results. Either way I am sorry for the long wait and thank you all for your patience and bearing with me. But good news! I've finally written something that feels at least moderately satisfactory. So without further adieu as I've made you wait long enough. I give you the next chapter.

______________________________________________

Chapter 16: I See So Many Ways That I Can Love You ‘Til The Day I Die

Eh...heh...heh... H’EsTchew…Heschew..Heh’ESCHeww

Jamie lurches up in the bed disrupting the peaceful almost slumber he’d found himself in lying next to River the feeling of him pressing into his chest, the sound of his heartbeat next to his ear.

“Bless you sweetheart. Are you alright? We didn’t overdo it today did we?”

Jamie actually doesn’t feel too bad, shifting had helped expedite his healing. His body doesn’t feel as bone achingly sore and he noticed in the mirror earlier that his bruises on his face had faded some. Even the ones on his body don’t seem as severe thankfully so, because mostly his cold just seems to be lingering in his nose, and it is nice to not have sneezing be so uncomfortable.

“No, I’m fine. Being a wolf my immune system is generally stronger than most so even when I do get sick I don’t think it’s nearly as debilitating as it would be. I think the suppressant they were giving me did prevent my body from repairing itself and healing itself as quickly as it would but since I’m not being re-upped and I’m sure it’s out of my bloodstream I’m recovering pretty quickly. I already feel better than I did yesterday. Shifting also accelerates healing so I’m heaps better. Just had a lingering tickle in my nose.”

“Wolf life is just full of surprises. What other knowledge am I missing? Oh! since you’ve bitten me am I going to become a wolf now? Should I begin preparing for the next full moon?” River says with a teasing smile his eyes reflecting a hint of mischief.

Jamie laughs. “Sorry Riv, you’re stuck as an inferior human.”

River feigns indignation. “I’ll show you inferior.” With spry agility he settles into Jamie’s lap pushing him down into the bed tugging on Jamie’s ear. Giving a smug smile when Jamie groans but it’s short lived when he has to hastily pull back.

Hhh’SssTCh….’TtSsTch….Hhh’Hhh’SssSTccchu

Jamie quirks his eyebrow the traces of a smile he’s trying to hold back touching his lips.

“Oh shut up.” River says fondly.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You didn’t have to.” River touches the spot in his sternum and immediately Jamie’s chest heats. “I know what you’re thinking remember.”

Jamie chuckles shaking his head. “And I told you it doesn’t work like that.”

“Doesn’t have to Jam, you’re mine, I still know what you’re thinking.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yes. You see like right now, you’re thinking you want me to stop sucking on your nipples and put my mouth to use elsewhere.”

Jamie snorts. “You’re not even—Uhhhgh” His sentence turns into a gasping groan as River’s mouth closes around his nipple giving one long suck drawing it between his teeth. The sharp sting igniting into pleasure. River twiddles his other nipple with his fingers. Are those actual sparks flying off him? God Jamie can’t think when River, oh holy hell what was that? Jamie bucks up into River.

“Please. Oh please.” He moans.

River draws back with a satisfied smile. “You were saying?”

“Neat trick.” Jamie says but not wanting to give River sole control continues “But I have some tricks up my sleeve as well sunshine. You’re equally mine, which means I also know what you’re thinking.” He pulls River’s face to his cupping his hand around River’s before whispering into his ear low and sultry.

River responds with a helpless whimper. “So it would seem.” He gets out before having to turn away.

Hhh’TtSTch…Hhh’SsSSTCh…Hhh’Hhh’TSsSSTchu

 “Bless.”

“Thanks.”

Before they're able to say anything more both their stomachs grumble and Jamie laughs “I think what we both really need is to feed a hunger of a different kind.”

River laughs too.

“I saw in town there is this pizza joint would you feel up to going out?”

Jamie’s entire body goes rim rod straight and equally as tense. He knows it's an irrational response, but he can't help the racing of his heart, a wooshing sound like the ocean floods his eardrums and he can feel the hairs on the back of his head stand. He's so overcome that for a moment he feels like he might be sick or pass out.

River immediately senses the shift and reads the panic in Jamie's body, he takes Jamie’s hand giving it a gentle squeeze. “Breathe sweetheart."

 

It takes a second, Jamie's hearing still flooded with the white noise but River's touch tethers him to reality and from fully slipping into his panic, and after several moments pause he obeys taking a shuddering breath in.

"That's it, let it out. Breathe in again, let your lungs expand, good. Now slowly release."

Jamie takes the air out in a measured pace.

"We don’t have to sweetie, if you’d rather stay in. We can just order take-out or something and go out some other time.”

Jamie scans River’s face, and he knows that River means it but he doesn’t want River to constantly be making the sacrifices or forgoing activities because Jamie is dealing with some kind of post-traumatic stress from his time in prison. He doesn't even understand fully or know why he's panicking. He suspects that it's related to so many months in isolation and now feeling overwhelmed even frightened to be around other people. Jamie was never the most socially adapt person prior to prison but now he felt like he completely didn't know how to people anymore. 

“No I-I want to, we should go. I should be able to.”

"Jam, there is no rule book for these situations. It's okay if you aren't ready for a public outing just yet."

Jamie smiles meekly "Better sooner rather than later. Rip the band-aid off as it were."

"I understand that. I just don't want you pushing yourself if you're not ready, you're allowed to need time." 

"I-I think if I wait it will only become that much more daunting and terrifying. I know we're somewhere safe, somewhere we don't have to hide and can be open. I want that and I want to give you that." 

River presses a soft kiss against Jamie's lips. "Okay, sweetheart. I support you and I'm with you. Is there anything that will help you think?"

"I yeah I think I need to shift just for a little bit."

River smiles easily "Okay, then let's do that. Do you want to go for a run or stay inside?"

"Stay inside but umm I'll go out into the living room so I don't cover our bed in fur."

"Okay sweetheart" River says getting up to follow Jamie to the living room. As he's stripping out of his clothes River says "Take as long as you need and if it doesn't happen tonight, that's alright too. I have you with me now finally, nothing means more to me than that."

Jamie kisses River's cheek, his nerves are still on edge but the shift will help and he knows River's support and unconditional love will ground him. A presence of a wolf mate in wolf form can soothe the other. It's an evolutionary advantage wolves have developed to allow them to keep their pack calm and happy. Jamie shifts into his wolf form.

"Hi gorgeous" River says taking a seat on the floor his back against the couch. Jamie can't help the pleased grunt that emanates from him. "Come here and lay your head in my lap. Let me give you pets."

Jamie plops down resting his chin on River's thigh. He begins to whisper words of praise, comfort and love and it's not long before Jamie feels himself sinking into his body, his muscles going pliant and loose. River begins to quietly sing Adele's "Make you feel my love" He lets the dulcet loving sound of River's voice wash over him. It's like a balm that covers him preventing him from cracking, calming and relaxing him. River's fingers continue to card through his fur, the sensation soothing and pleasant. The anxiety and fear exits his body entering a meditative state. He drifts, floating somewhere in a space between awake and asleep. It's peaceful and warm. The soft halo of River's presence easing all his nerves.

"That's it sweetheart." River coos. "You're okay. Everything is going to be fine. I've g--goot yyou-"

Hhh'Hhh'SsSSSSssTTch...Hhh'TsssSSTCh..Hh'Hh'Hhh'SsSSSSSTttTCHu...Hh'HEh'SssSTCh..HHh'TtSstTCh..Hh'HHEh'SSTchu...Hh'hh'SSSSSSTCchu...Hh'EsSSSTch

River is still running his hands through Jamie's fur after 6 more sneezes and Jamie feels infinitely calmer wanting to save River from more nasal torture he shifts back. His brain and his body start to synch, he can feel himself coming back into his human skin and soon enough his body is solid flesh and bone. He takes a moment to appreciate the feeling of River underneath him before lifting his head.

River is looking at him with a pure adoration. Jamie knows River loves him no matter what, human, wolf, and all his idiosyncrasies that lie between the two, but seeing the pure acceptance, affection, and unwavering devotion written in every part of River's features is an indescribable feeling. 

Jamie sits up taking River's lips in a grateful kiss. "I love you."

River responds by gently tugging Jamie's lower lip between his teeth, the touch ignites Jamie's entrails, heat settling in his abdomen, his stomach doing a giddy flip. He can feel River's desire and want in his chest, his entire body attuned to River. He groans into the kiss, his tongue swiping out to enter River's mouth, River answers by giving a sexy groan of his own, the sound causing Jamie to crawl on top of River pushing him to the floor. 

Jamie's fingers slide up River's bare chest, the skin so silky and smooth. He tweaks River's nipple, his mouth swallowing the moan that comes from him. He lets his tongue dip in deeper exploring and savoring every inch. When he has to pull back to catch his breath he does so with reluctance, he rests his forehead against River's, the connection between them buzzing with electricity, it feels like his whole being is alight, the spark traveling up his spine and down his arms and legs. He looks into River's eyes, the green orbs filled with such a deep love. A wave of bliss and happiness crashes over them and Jamie's struck again at the magnitude of what they have together, the power of their bond. It's a force to be reckoned with.

River brushes a kiss on his lips, soft and sweet. "I love you too sweetheart." He returns. They stay there a moment, lost in each other, basking in the feeling, until their stomachs once again start making their hunger known.

"Maybe we should go grab that pizza now." Jamie says a nervous tremor lacing his voice.

River looks him in the eye. "You're sure you're ready? We really don't have to. I'm more than okay with staying in and continuing this.

Jamie nods. "Yes. I feel better, calmer. Let's go."

***

Half an hour later they find themselves seated at a corner booth in a quaint little restaurant, away from the main seating at River's request, having picked up on Jamie's building tension as they entered into the establishment.

The aroma of fresh baked pizza crust fills the air. Jamie’s looking over the menu his eyes unfocused his brows furrowing.

River reaches over to grab Jamie's hand. "Hey."

Jamie gives him a small smile.

"Are you sure about this? We can go if you aren't ready, or we can order it to go and take it back to the cabin."

"No, I can do this, it’s alright."

River eyes him critically. "Remember that whole bit about my knowing what you're thinking?"

Jamie chuckles blowing out a heavy breath. "It's a lot but the seating arrangement helps and I'm with you. You're my safe place. I can do this as long as you're with me."

River’s expression is warm and gentle and he interlocks his fingers into Jamie’s "Always, sweetheart, I've got you."

They order their food and while they wait they share easy conversation, talking and laughing and soon Jamie forgets to pay attention to the commotion going on around them zeroed in on River and River alone, sealing them in a bubble. It's like it used to be and Jamie revels in the simplicity and ease of being with River, how well they just fit, the way his smile brightens his whole face, and the way his eyes dance, and the way he makes him feel. He knows he's staring and probably grinning like an idiot, but he's so in love with River, he can't help himself.

“That’s it, I don’t know if I can be with you anymore. Pineapple doesn’t belong on pizza." River says watching Jamie in exaggerated horror as he takes a bite off a slice of his Hawaiian pizza.

“We’re in Canada now sunshine, better get used to it.” Jamie makes a big show of taking another large bite of his slice of pizza.

"Shouldn't Canadians put I don't know Maple Syrup on their pizza, like on the bacon pizza, that sounds way more Canadian than pineapple." 

Jamie chuckles. "Actually, now that you mention it...." 

River laughs. "I'll give that to you, that sounds better than pineapple on pizza, that's just sacrilege." 

"What are you talking about!? It’s the perfect topping, it’s the perfect combination of sweet, salty, and tangy from the sauce."

“Well, joke's on you Jam, I can’t put my lips anywhere near someone that puts pineapple on their pizza.”

Jamie swipes his tongue to the corner of his mouth to wipe away some stray sauce, catching River tracking the movement. He smirks leaning into River “I think that isn’t true at all. In fact, I think if I were to kiss you right now, you would absolutely have no objections.”

River’s eyes widen maybe from surprise at Jamie’s brazenness in public, maybe out of arousal.

Jamie gives a hangdog sigh the smallest hint of a smile still gracing his lips “But since you protest I’ll keep my lips to myself.” He begins to pull away but River rather forcefully grabs him by his shirt smashing his lips to Jamie’s.

Jamie gasps and while his mouth is open River takes it as an opportunity to let his tongue trace along the seam of Jamie’s lips. It’s teasing and he makes no move to deepen the kiss, perhaps to play with Jamie but more likely to keep it appropriate for public consumption.

“Pineapple on pizza is still disgusting.” River says with finality after he pulls away.

"And yet, you still kissed me." Jamie teases.

"You are worth the suffering."

"So you'll admit I was right, you wouldn't object to kissing me, even after consuming pineapple pizza.”

“Yes okay, you’re right. I am a sucker for your lips.” River says with a grin before turning away pulling up his shirt collar over his mouth and nose.

Hhh’TttSsTch…Hhh’SsssTCh…Hhhh’TttSSTCh….Hhehh..Hhh’Hhhh’TttSTch

“Bless you.” Jamie returns his grin. He takes another bite of his pizza, savoring the combination of flavors. 

River shakes his head and rolls his eyes before leaning in and give Jamie another passionate kiss. "Fine. I'll admit that maybe the pineapple isn't too terrible on the pizza, and the bacon and onions add a nice touch."

"It's the best. Admit it Riv, this pizza is the best."

“I will concede to the fact that it tastes the best off your lips. Is that good enough?”

Jamie grins. "I’ll take it.” As he’s finishing the sentence River is turning slightly away from him again.

Hhh’TttSsSssTch…Hhh’SsssTCh…Hhhh—TtsTtSCH…Hh’HhTSStch

Jamie frowns. “Maybe I should move to sit across the table so I’m not aggravating your allergies.”

River scoffs. "You will do no such thing. If you move to the other side of the table I won't be able to do this so easily." He leans forward pressing a soft kiss to Jamie's cheek.

"Besides, it's worth a few sneezes here and there. I'll take that any day so long as it means you’re with me. I would endure a billion trillion sneezes, so long as I get to be with you. There is no question about that. Besides, the allergy shots do really seem to be working."

Jamie's heart feels so full, he doesn't think he'll ever get over River's willingness to accept him in every way, wolf included. He doesn't know what he did to deserve River. He feels like his love for him is too much, that his heart is too full and that it's spilling out of him, like he's bursting at the seams. He hopes that River can at least sense some of it through the soul bond. He wants him to feel everything, how grateful he is for him, how much he loves him, how lucky he feels. He’s pulled from his thoughts by another round of River sneezing.

Hhh'Hhh’Hhh’SssTCh...T'TSSCh...Hhh'Hhh’HhEh’TTSTch..TssTCh..Hhhh’SSssTCh..Hh'Hh’Hhh’TttSSSTch

"Bless."

"Thank you. I'll try not to sneeze on your food, though" River adds. "As much as it's an abomination to pizza."

Jamie laughs. "I thought we'd come to the conclusion that it wasn't so bad. But I'll tell you, if you do sneeze on it you'll have to eat it. I don’t mind if you sneeze on me, but you sneezing on my food is definitely where I draw the line." He teases.

River jokes back “Yeah, that makes sense, I can see why you’d draw the line there, it’s not like it’s basically the same thing.”

Jamie grins leaning in for a kiss which River abruptly aborts turning away with a set of his rapid sneezes.

Hhh’TttTSssTCh…Hhh’SsssSTCH…Hhh’TttSSTCH..Hh’Hh’HhheH’SsSSSTttChu...Hhh'Hhh'HhEhh'SSssSSTCh

“Bless you” Jamie says before over exaggeratedly moving his plate away from River with a smirk.

“Hey, jerk, I was nowhere near your precious pineapple pizza.” River says in mock offense evidenced by the glint in his eye and the eye crinkling smile on his face.

They continue to eat, conversation flowing easily through the rest of dinner and Jamie is surprised at how much he’s enjoying the simple happiness that is being out in public with River and having a good meal. Jamie had thought that being in a crowded restaurant would feel stifling and overwhelming. Perhaps it’s because he has the strength and comfort of River beside him but he actually feels relaxed. Relaxed and satiated. He consumed his entire pizza. A feat he probably normally wouldn’t be able to complete but when the pizza was put in front of him he realized how hungry he was. He realized how much he missed the comforts of life on the outside. This was the most he’d eaten since prior to his incarceration.

When they’ve both devoured their pizza the server comes by he asks if they want desert and River excitedly asks for a chocolate brownie cake with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. After the server delivers the desert, River slides it in front of Jamie.

"Why are you giving it to me?"

River's smile is full of affection and tenderness. "Because, as long as I have you I have all the sweetness I need."

Jamie's heart thumps. He's so overcome by his affection for the man before him, he's so incredibly lucky and so undeserving of this gift, this blessing, his soulmate. His heart swells and he wants to say so much but the words escape him so instead he leans next to River and captures his lips in a sweet yet sensual kiss.

When he pulls away River licks his lips and with a smirk says “And because I have the most generous partner in the world who shares.”

Jamie chuckles scooping a generous bite of the brownie with ice-cream onto his spoon holding out to River. River parts his lips accepting the bite, with a satisfied moan. The sound shoots straight to Jamie's groan, and he wants to hear more, he wants to hear River make all the noises, wants to elicit all his responses. God he needs him. River catches the shift in Jamie's eyes and responds by reaching under the table and brushing his hand up Jamie's inner thigh running his thumb in a slow circle against the seam of Jamie's pants with a light teasing pressure. The touch sends a zing that zips up Jamie's spine. River is looking at him through hooded lashes as he takes the next bite his expression all innocence.

Jamie’s mouth opens on a silent gasp. “Fuck” he says under his breath.

“Later” River responds with a wink but continues to play dangerously close to very sensitive and responsive parts of Jamie.

“There won’t be if you keep teasing me like this.” Jamie grits out his mind preoccupied with fantasies, images, and ideas of what he'd like to do to River.

River smiles playfully smug but withdraws his hand, and Jamie isn't sure if he's relieved or disappointed. He doesn't particularly want to start a scene in public but he can't deny that when he's with River the line of socially acceptable touch and public displays of affection blurs.

River opens his mouth silently asking for another bite. Jamie tries not to squirm with how much this turns him on. It's such a simple act, but he loves it. He loves caring for and loving River in this way, the trust and intimacy it fosters and he melts over how accepting River is over his actions.

River continues to take bites from Jamie's spoon moaning around each bite. If the little knowing looks River is shooting at Jamie after each bite is anything to go by he’s doing it intentionally to get Jamie worked up. His cheeks flood with color because dammit it’s working.

As their server brings it to them she says “I just have to tell you, how adorable the staff here tonight found you. It’s clear how in love you are. I hope to find a relationship like yours one day.”

Jamie blushes but he catches the twinkling green of River’s eyes and they both smile at each other instinctively reaching for each other’s hand and interlocking their fingers.

“Thank you, that’s really nice to hear.” River says to the server.

“See it’s things like that, that tells me humanity isn’t lost.” River remarks once they’re loaded in the car and headed back to their cabin. “I just know we’re gonna beat the stupid law.”

On the drive home they are both humming in quiet contentment. When they get back to the cabin. Jamie goes to light the fireplace. It’s a cold winter night and it will feel good to have a cozy fire burning, the heat warming the cabin.

Jamie gets the fire going, the flames curling around the wood, the orange and red dancing, the crackling and popping. River is huddled on the couch watching the flames. He looks so beautiful. Jamie thinks and his heart swells. The warm light from the fire painting him in the most golden glow. He's wearing a soft oversized sweater the material draping delicately over his body. He turns his head slightly looking up at Jamie. Jamie's breath is knocked from him. River's face is a mixture of pure serenity, peace and love and it makes him look like an angel, and it hits Jamie right in his soul, the overwhelming joy that fills him, the warmth, the contentment, the gratitude, the wonder.

"Hey" River says simply.

Jamie doesn't have the words. His throat constricts and all the things he wants to say clog in his throat. All he can do is cross the room to the couch and take River into his arms.

"I love you" He breathes into his ear, it’s about the only coherency he has at the present moment. He just hopes that River knows it’s so much more than that. What he feels for River is all consuming.

"I love you" He breathes into his ear, it’s about the only coherency he has at the present moment. He just hopes that River knows it’s so much more than that. What he feels for River is all consuming. He kisses River hoping that it says everything that he can't, all the stamps of emotion that are too powerful to put into words.

He pulls back and sees the depth of emotion mirrored in River's own gaze, and he knows he does and the way River initiates a new kiss Jamie knows he's hearing everything River isn't saying as well. He can feel River's pulse thrumming in his chest. Jamie's own beating in perfect synchronized rhythm with River's.

"I love you too" River whispers back leaving a trail of open mouthed kisses all along Jamie's jawline.

The warmth of River's touch burns a path through Jamie's body, a feeling that he will never get tired of and one he knows he’s going to feel for the rest of his life.

"God Riv, the way you look in the firelight. You are like this celestial creature, an angel and you're mine, my angel. I can't believe it. You're so gorgeous. I didn’t know it was possible to love anyone this much."

River nuzzles into Jamie's neck. "You're the gorgeous one.” He says tugging Jamie’s head down and claiming Jamie’s lips. Jamie offers no resistance sighing against River’s lips wrapping his arms together around River pulling him flush against his body. River parts his lips deepening the kiss and Jamie can't help the moan that escapes his lips. River's presence, his essence, his scent envelopes Jamie securing him tighter than a blanket. Jamie is so lost in his euphoria that it takes him a second to realize that the sound that's interrupting them is River.

Hhh’TTssTch…Hhh’SSssTCh..Hhehh’TttStch..Hh’EsssTch…Hhh’SssTtChu

"Bless you angel."

River reveals his dimpling smile. “Angel huh?”

“If the shoe fits.”

“I ll-lllikke Hhhh it.” River is able to barely get out.

Hhh’SsssTTCchu…Hh’TttSSSsSSSTCh…Hhhehh’TtttSSSsSSTCH…Hhh’SssSSTCHu

“Bless you” Jamie says noting that River’s sneezing has been increasing since the restaurant. "You okay?" Jamie asks.

"Yeah I’m fine, just a tickle.

"You want to head to bed?”

"Mm, no I want to stay right here with you."

"We can do that." Jamie says pulling River against him. River snuggles into Jamie as Jamie settles them his arms wrapping around River from behind, his head resting on River's shoulder, his nose nestled into his hair. The flames warm and comforting.

"This is perfect" River sighs.

"It is." Jamie agrees.

A peaceful silence stretches between them, the only sound is the crackling of the fire.

After a moment River speaks up. "Do you ever wish things could be different? I mean we both know there is nothing either of us wouldn't do for the other, that we'd do anything to be together. Would you have wished that you'd never been locked up? That the world was kinder to us?"

"I wish we lived in a more accepting world, that the types of injustices we experience don’t exist, but since we don’t, no I can’t wish that none of this happened." Jamie says.

River doesn't say anything but Jamie knows his question without him needing to ask it.

"It would have been easier, and sure I would have loved the chance to spend the past year with you but my incarceration has the ability to affect real monumental societal change. My case is being taken to the Supreme Court, it could very well over-turn the law not just in Montana but across all the states that have instated anti-wolf and human partnerships. What we've been through can make it that other people don't have to. I also don't want to mourn the time that was taken away from us. I want to make the most of the time we have now. Because I'm never letting you go."

River snuggles deeper into Jamie a silent agreement.

Hhh'Hhh’HhhEH’TTSch…HEhh'Hhh’Hhh’TSSssTch…HhH’SSsssTchu…Hhh’TSssTch..Hhhh’SSsTTTChh

"Bless you"

"Thanks" River sniffles.

HhEH'hSSsSSSsSTCh...HhhH'ESSSTCHu…..Hhh’Hhh’Hhh’TTSSTch…’SssSTch…Hhh’TttSTch.. 'TTSch'hHh'HsSsTCHh…

"Bless you." Jamie says his voice concerned, River is sneezing with increasing frequency and intensity. "Are you sure you’re alright, you’re sneezing quite a lot.”

"I'm fine Jam. It's just an allergy tickle."

Jamie is more than a little dubious. Jamie is well aware of River's allergy sneezes and while these sneezes perhaps sound the same to someone with a less discerning ear and someone who doesn't know River the way Jamie does, they might not notice the slight variances. How they sound harsher than his typical releases. How they seem to emanate more from his chest than his nose. How River's breathing sounds more slightly labored and congested after each sneeze. Jamie has spent the better part of a year with a cold, he is intimately familiar with what it’s like to be sick after the past year and this seems like the beginnings of a cold that’s coming on hard and fast.

Jamie presses the back of his palm to River’s forehead but with his own body heat he can’t quite discern if River has a fever or not.

"Jam. It’s just allergies, it’s nothing new.”

"You're right. Nothing to worry about.” Jamie repeats, trying to convince himself.  River knows more than he but that assessment just doesn't seem right.

River's face scrunches up a tell-tale sign he's about to sneeze.

HEHH'HsSSsSTCHh!!...Hehh'HHhh’Hhh’SSSsSTCHh!!...HEHE'EHSSstchh…Hhhh’SSSSTChu...Hhh'Hhh'Hhh'TttTTSsssSSTCh!

"Bless you. I think it's bedtime."

"It's early."

"Not really. It's 10:30."

"I don't want to sleep. I—I www-wwaaant—“

Hhhh'ESSTcH!...HhhH'ESTcHh..EHH'ESSCHU.. EHH'HsSTCHh...Hehh'HsSTCHh... HEHE'EHSSstch

“I wwaant tt-ttoo—“

HE’Hhh’Hhh’HE'SSStch...Hehh'HHeSSSTCHHhh

“I’m nnnoottt tti—HeeH-tired aa—aand—“

Hhh'TSsSsTCh...Hhh'TStTchhh'h'ESSStsch

“Eee—eevery mmm-mminute—Ohhh God—“

Hhh’Hhh'HhEH'SssTCh…Hhheh’ESSSTCh…Hhh’TSSSTch…Ehh’StChh

Jamie folds his arms around River. “Don’t try to talk Rivy, just get these sneezes out and then you can tell me what you want to say.”

River heeds Jamie’s advice stopping talking and just allowing the sneezes to take over completely.

Hhh'Hhh’Hhh’SsSsTCH...Hhh'ESSSSTcH..Hhh'ESSSTTch...HEhh'EesssTSch..Hh'Ehehh'EsssSSTch...HhH'HhhEhh'Hhh'SSSSTTTSCh

Finally the fit ends.

"Bless you Riv.”

"Ugh sorry, I’m not sure where all that came from."

Jamie tries gently “Riv, they’re a symptom.”

"Not of my allergies, the shots have been really effective. I felt sneezy when you shifted earlier but even so it hasn't been like this since you returned.”

Jamie shakes his head. "No angel, not a symptom of your allergies, of the cold that it seems you’ve caught.”

"What!? Don't be silly. I don't have a cold. It’s just, I must be having a sensitive day. My allergist said that might be expected especially during the early stages of immunotherapy.”

Jamie sighs, he won’t push the point yet, maybe he’s overreacting and River really is just having an allergic reaction. He did shift indoors after-all and although the allergy shots seem to have greatly reduced the severity of his allergy he’ll probably always have at least a moderate sensitivity to Jamie, and as he’s also mentioned he hasn’t completed the full cycle of immunotherapy. River did say that they’ve found allergy shots to be most effective a year or two into treatment. His body also probably needs time to adjust to having constant exposure to an allergen. He's sure that's probably not typical while undergoing immunotherapy. 

“Okay, it’s just an allergy fit, even so I think we should get you into bed.”

“I told you I’m not tired and I don’t want to sleep. If I sleep that means I lose time with you, every minute I’m awake is another moment I can’t be with you.”

Jamie goes all soft at River’s words. “Oh angel, we don’t have to sleep, but I do think that the bed will be more comfortable, and I can hold and cuddle you properly in bed. What do you say?”

River nods. Jamie helps River up from the couch and they move the few feet to the bed, where River immediately curls into Jamie.

"I want to stay up all night." River says fighting off a yawn his voice sounding like he's already on the verge of sleep. "Need to make up for all the months I couldn't be with you that you weren't with me." River mumbles his head falling forward half-way into sleep before River stubbornly throws it back. "So we're not sleeping."

Jamie bites his lip to hide his smile over River's stubbornness. "Of course, no sleeping."

Hhh'ESSStch…Hh’Hh’Hhh’ESSSstcHh.. Hhhh'SsSsSSTChuu...Hhh'Hhh'Hhh'ESSSSTCh

"Bless you."

"Still not sick.” River slurs. Before pitching forward with another set of 4 sneezes.

“Bless you Riv.”

“You don't have to bless me." River grumbles.

Jamie releases a soft chuckle tangling his fingers in River’s curls. "Riv, you have to know by now, I'll always bless you, remember I promised you an abundance of blessings, and even angels deserve to be blessed.”

“I seem to recall you also requesting royalties from the riches I receive from your many blessings.”

“I get to spend my life with you, I can’t imagine a greater royalty than that.”

River smiles before his face falls with an expression that Jamie knows all too well.

Hhh'Hhh’Hh’EssTcH...Hh'ESSsSSTcH!...Hhh'Ess'TScHu…Hhh’Hhh’ESSSTCH..HhE'Hhhh’SsSSsssTCHU

"Bless you"

"I guess it would be too much to ask for a kiss?" River says looking up earnestly at Jamie with pleading eyes.

Jamie laughs. "No, not too much at all. Come here." Jamie kisses him sweet and gentle.

"Thank you. Now let's stay up all night."

"Okay sunshine." Jamie says stroking his hand through River's hair knowing full well he’s going to be asleep within the next 15 minutes or less.

Hh'Hhh’Hh’SsSTSSCh...HEss'TSssh.. Hh'ESSsSTsCh…Hhh’HhEH’EsSssTCh

"Bless you." Jamie says trying not to smile, even River’s sneezes sound tired.

"Thanks." River's voice sounds hoarse

Jamie doesn't comment on it, despite the fact that it's another indicator that he's coming down with a cold. It could also just be sleep induced rasp so. He continues to massage River's scalp hoping the soothing touches will lull him into sleep. Sick or not a good night rest will be good for him. After a little while Jamie hears the softest snoring and looks down to see River has fallen asleep. He checks his phone for the time and yep, as suspected it hadn’t even been 10 minutes. He smiles affectionately giving the tip of River's head a soft kiss before carefully slipping out of River's embrace to go attend to the fire and get ready for bed himself.

As he's brushing his teeth, he hears a faint rustling coming from the bedroom.

Hhh'EEsssTCH...Hhh'Hhh'ESSSTCHhh...Hhh'Hhh'HH’EsssSSTChh...HH'Hhh’TTSssSSSSTchu

Jamie comes into the bedroom to see River reaching for the tissue box on the nightstand.

"Bless you sunshine.” Jamie reaches out to feel his forehead again but River bats his hand away.

"River."

"Jam, I'm okay. Really. Just a few little sneezes. They are no big deal. It’ll pass. Now about this all-nighter—“

Jamie gives an exasperated sigh though it comes out more fond and affectionate than truly annoyed. River is half a second from falling asleep again anyways. "Tell you what sunshine why don't we start with snuggles and see where that takes us."

River yawns. "Mmm, that sounds nice."

Jamie climbs into bed wrapping his arm around River who nuzzles his head against Jamie's chest. Jamie presses a kiss to his forehead. As suspected within mere minutes River is drifting off to sleep.

"Sweet dreams angel." Jamie presses his lips against River's head.

"Love you" River whispers before his breathing evens out and he's sound asleep.

"I love you too." Jamie replies though he knows River won't hear him. He feels his own eyelids growing heavy and his eyes begin to flutter shut when he feels River’s body tense against his.

Hhh'ESTSsTCh

"Bless you" Jamie murmurs wrapping River tightly in his arms hoping that single sneeze is all and it doesn’t pull River to far out of sleep, he really needs rest because despite his protests to the contrary Jamie is reasonably positive that he’s fallen ill. The last thing he thinks before he too drifts off to sleep is that if that's the case River probably isn't going to feel too great tomorrow. 

***

Jamie wakes the next morning to River sneezing next to him.

HHEhh’Hhhh’HheH'SSSTch...Hhh'Hhhh’SSsTCh...hh'TSSCh…HhhEh’Hhhh’TSSsSSTchu...Hhh'Hhh’HhhEH’TSSSSTCHu...Hhh'HHhehh’SSSssTChh...Hh'Hhh'HH'hssSSSSTttChuu

Jamie no longer has any doubt that River has caught his cold. While his sneezes are still rapid and more delicate than most the build-ups are more pronounced and they seem harsher, like they require a significant amount of energy to be pulled out of his body.

"Bless you."

"Thanks" River says sleepily his voice thick.

Jamie presses the back of his palm against River's forehead and this time he can tell he has a fever.

"You're burning up sunshine."

"Am I?" River blinks his eyes open. They’re glossy and heavy lidded.

"You sound congested too. I think we should take your temperature."

River shakes his head and begins to sit up but his body sways a bit. "Whoa. Dizzy"

Jamie steadies him. "You need to lie back down and rest."

"M'fine."

"Riv." Jamie says his tone firm but affectionate.

"Yes, doctor."

Jamie helps River get settled back in his previous spot on the couch and grabs a thermometer.

"Open up."

"You're really sexy when you’re all protective and commanding you know that?" River slurs.

Jamie gives an amused smile. "And you're delirious when you're sick and out of it."

"Mmm deliriously handsome also not sick."

Hhhh’HhEhh’ESsssTCh…Hhhh’Hhheh’Hhhh’TTSSSSSTCh…HhhH’HhEH’SSSSSTChhUu

Jamie holds River’s gaze giving him a pointed look.

"Fine. Take my temperature, doc."

"Gladly."

When the thermometer beeps Jamie reads it. “39.2C” He reads.

“I don’t know what that means, I’m not the Canadian remember?” River grumbles.

Jamie chuckles “Let me translate it for you angel, it means you have a high fever.”

"You can't blame me, I'm hot."

Jamie gives another chuckle "Yes, you’re very hot. But I'd prefer you to be a healthy hot.”

"You're a healthy hot." He grumbles.

Jamie chuckles "I don't think that's the insult you mean it to be Riv."

"No, it's not." He admits.

"Well, you're a cute sicky."

"You're not supposed to call the patient cute. It's against the rules."

“Is that so? Alright, how 'bout you’re an adorable sicky.”

River rolls his eyes but before he can provide another rebuttal he sneezes again.

Hh’Hhh’SSsSSTchh... HhEh'Hhh’EssssSCHh...Hhh'HhhEHh'HhhhSs'SSTCHhhu... Hhh’HhhEh’Hh’'HTSSsSSSTCHHuu

"Bless you.”

“So, what's the prognosis doctor?"

"The prognosis is that the patient needs rest, fluids and lots of cuddles."

"I like the sound of the last one."

"Well the patient is in luck then, because when the doctor is off duty he loves to cuddle his cute and adorable mate.”

Jamie settles into the bed next to River tucking him and pulling him into his arms and River instantly curls into him.

HhH’HhhhH’SssstChhh.. HhH’Hhh’'TSSTchhh...HhEHH'SsSsTSCHhh…HhhEh’Hhh’Hhh’EsSSSSssSTCH

"Bless."

"Thanks." River snuggles deeper into Jamie his eyes drifting closed.

"Rest now. I'll be right here if you need me."

River snores in response.

"Sleep well angel." Jamie presses a kiss to his head and begins to rub his back in soothing circles.

Jamie stays in the bed until he is sure that River is in a deep sleep before he slips out heading into the chicken to begin making some chicken noodle soup for when River wakes up.

Jamie’s had the soup simmering on the stove for the past several hours allowing the flavors to get enhanced and the smell fills the air when he checks on River. He’s still curled up tightly in the blankets, his hair is in disarray standing up every which way. Jamie smiles instantly. He carefully slides into the bed. River immediately slides his body against his mumbling incoherently.

Hhhh'HH’HhhEH’SSS'TSs'SHhu..Hhhh'EsssSTSSTChhh...Hh'HhsSTSSCHh.. Hhh'HhEH’EessSTCHhu..

"Bless you."

"Mm."

“How are you feeling?”

"I'm a lot better, see, no sneezing."

Jamie rolls his eyes, why is River’s refusal to accept his illness so precious? “Right and what do you call what happened 5 seconds ago?”

"That was just, you know I sneeze more when I first wake up. It doesn’t mee-mmeeaan Hhhh—“

Hhh’HhhEEH’ESSSSSssTCHu..HhheHH’HhEEH’TttSSSTCH..Hh’Hhh’HhhEH’EssSSSTChu

“It doesn’t mean anything” River finishes.

Jamie eyes River his already creamy skin is paler than usual, extending to his ordinarily mauve lips, his face appears swollen from the congestion in his sinuses, his eyelids are heavy and droopy, and the exhaustion is written all over his face. 

“Besides, I’m done, no more sneezing.”

“Right, of course no more sneezing.” Jamie says already seeing River’s nose give a little twitch.

“What does that mean?”

“Nothing, it means nothing angel.” Jamie says unable to hide his smile. River is about to be aware of what it means any second.

River opens his mouth to reply, but all that comes out is a series of strong sneezes.

HH'HhhEEH’ESsSTtTChhh..Hhh'HHEEH’SSSSSttTCh..Hhh'HhhEEHH’ESSsSTCHhh...HH'HHEhh'SSSsSTTCHhh...HH'HHhhEhH'EssTChhh

Jamie grins.

"That doesn't count" River whines "That was from my allergies. Your hair got in my nose."

"Whatever you say sunshine." Jamie leans down and kisses him, he means it to be just a brush of lips, sweet and short, he doesn't want to aggravate River's symptoms, but River isn't having any of it. He grips Jamie's shirt pulling him down and deepening the kiss. It’s difficult not to get lost in the kiss, River is far too tempting but he reminds himself that River needs proper rest, whether he wants to admit it or not he's ill and shouldn't be getting to worked up. Finding self-restraint he pulls away. River blinks his eyes meeting Jamie’s dark and lusty.

"Mmm, you should kiss me again."

"You should drink some water, eat some food and rest."

River pouts. "I'd rather do the other thing."

Jamie gives a soft chuckle tracing River’s lips with his thumb. "If you drink a whole glass of water, eat at least a little, and promise you'll stay in bed I'll reward you with a kiss."

"Just one?"

"River." Jamie warns.

"Ugh fine, but I'll take two kisses, one for drinking one for eating, I will accept nothing less."

Jamie smiles shaking his head but he agrees. "Two it is then."

"I'm holding you to that."

"I have no doubt you will. Here." Jamie hands him the glass of water. River reluctantly accepts it and takes a long sip.

"Yum. Water. It's so good." He says his tone laced with sarcasm.

"It is good, it'll help your body's immune system in facilitating you getting well quickly. Now drink."

River takes another sip. "It's not as good as your kisses."

Jamie chuckles. "And the sooner you finish off that glass and eat some the sooner you'll have my kisses."

River gives a dramatic sigh. "Fine."

River manages to drain the glass, and eat half a bowl of the soup, Jamie makes a mental note to check his temperature again in a few hours and try to convince him to eat more, but he is proud that he managed to get him to eat and drink at least some.

"Okay, I did what you say, where are my kisses?"

Jamie chuckles kissing River's forehead and then his cheek. "There you go, two kisses, as promised."

River pouts. "That's not what I meant."

"No?" Jamie teases.

"No. I wanted two real kisses, on the lips Jam." River says in a whiny tone folding his arms across his chest. It shouldn't be endearing, the way he's acting is so childish and yet Jamie finds himself amused and entirely endeared. With a smile he leans down capturing River's lips in a soft kiss. He tries to keep it chaste but as soon as River's tongue licks against his lips, he's done for, he opens his mouth and the kiss quickly becomes heated.

"Mm, that's more like it." River says breathlessly.

"You're trouble you know that?"

River’s body tenses and his nose scrunches, his nostrils flaring.

Hh'HHE'EsSSTtTCh... Hhe'HhEH’HEsSSssTChhh... Hh'HH'TssSSsTchhh..Hh'HHeH'sSsTChh..Hh'Hh'HhhEH’ESsSsSSStTTCh..Hh'HHE'sssSTttChu.

When the fit is done he continues like nothing happened. "But I'm your trouble, right?"

"Forever."

"And always?"

"That's right angel. Your mine forever and for always”

River hums contentedly with a pleased smile on his face snuggling into Jamie’s side with a yawn.

Jamie holds him tightly as his breathing evens out and his body goes limp and relaxed, asleep once more though the peaceful slumber only lasts a few short hours. River startles awake with a fit of coughs before dissolving into multiple sneezes.

HH'HhhEH’Hhh’EsssSSCHhh...Hhe'Hhh’HHEH’EHessssTCh..Hhh'Hhh’HHEHESs'SSSTchhhh..HH'HHe'EsssTttCh..HH'HHE'EshSSTChh...Hh'HHeSSsTChhh...Hh'HE'esSssCh...HH'HHe'Eh'EsSSsTChuu

"Bless you. How are you feeling angel?” Jamie asks knowing just from looking at River the answer but he’s curious what River will say.

River's head lolls back to look at Jamie his expression glazed over, his cheeks fiery red with fever. "I feel awful." He replies honestly and Jamie knows he has to be feeling awful if he's willingly admitting to it.

"Sssooo cold" He says his teeth chattering.

Jamie engulfs him with his warm body wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close so River's head nestles into his chest tucking in the blankets around River. River's sigh turns into a particularly harsh sounding set of sneezes.

Hh'He'HHhess'STChHHu...Hh'HheH'H'EsssTChUu..Hh'HH'HE'EEsSsTChhh...HH'HE'HhEHH'SSSS'TttCHHhuu

River groans sniffling back the mess that is edging its way out of his nose.

Jamie grabs several tissues holding them up to River's nose "Blow Rivy, your body is trying to expel the germs out of your system, don't sniff it back."

River does as Jamie says releasing the congestion that is clogging his nose.

"That's it angel, get it out." Jamie discards the tissues and pulls River back into him. River isn't able to get settled continuing to cough and sneeze.

"Jam." River whimpers pitifully.

"It's okay Riv. It's just your body's immune system, it's trying to get rid of the virus, you'll be alright. You're gonna be okay."

"Hurts" River whines.

"I know angel, I know, it's not pleasant." Jamie gently rubs his hand up and down River's arm.

HH'HHE'ESsTch...Hh'HH'e'HhessSSCHh..HH'hHee'sSSTch..HH'HE'esSssTTSTCh..Hh'Hhe'EEsssh'hh...HH'HHE'EsSSSTtChhh

River's whole body shakes with the force of the sneezes.

Jamie continues to stroke River and press kisses to his temple. "It's okay sunshine, just get these sneezes out. You'll feel a bit better."

Hhh'ESS'SSTCHu.. Hhh'ESSssSST'CH….HhhhH'EsssSTCH.. HH'hHee'sSSTCHHuu

When the fits finished Jamie assesses River, his nose is bright red, cheeks flushed with fever otherwise contrasting against his sickly pale skin, his eyes are puffy and glazed, his hair messy and damp with sweat. Jamie is riddled with guilt this is all his fault. He's the reason River is sick is because he is exposed to his germs. He should have been more careful. He should have taken better precautions.

"Jam." River's voice breaks.

"Hey angel, it's okay." Jamie assures him pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "Why don't I run you a bath, I think it will help loosen the congestion and make you feel better."

"Okay" River croaks.

Jamie helps River out of bed and gets him settled in the bathtub.

"Feel better?" Jamie asks.

River nods. "It feels nice."

"I'm glad." Jamie says his voice strained.

River furrows his brows. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

HhhEEHH’EEHh’SSsSSSSTttTCH…HhEH’SSSTTttTTCHU..Hhhh’HHhEEHH’ESSssSSTCHu

Those sounded particularly harsh and congested and Jamie winces knowing it was all his fault and with only his human immune system the cold symptoms seemed to be latching onto River far more severely than they ever had to Jamie.

"Nothing. Nothing's wrong, I'm just worried about you. I hate that you're sick. I wish I could just take it all away and make you better instantly."

"It's not your fault, you didn't get me sick."

Jamie laughs lacking in any real humor “But I did Riv. I exposed you to my cold. Instead of being careful I’ve been kissing you and touching you and sleeping with you. I should have quarantined myself until I was better."

"Fuck that Jamie Alldridge." River said "No take-backs. I wouldn't have allowed that. I wanted you near me and I sure as fuck wasn't going to let something like a cold keep you away from me. You can't blame yourself for this. And even if you could, you shouldn't. You make me happy. Being with you is worth the risk. So, please stop worrying. Yeah I feel like garbage but it's just a cold. I'll be fine in a few days."

"I just should have put you ahead of my own needs."

River rolls his eyes with fond exasperation. "Jam you are the most self-sacrificing person I know. But you know what, your needs are my needs. And I need to be with you. I’ll wade through a sea of germs and catch every illness imaginable if it means I get to be with you. Well, all the non life-threatening one’s anyway.”

Jamie chuckles.

River grins. "Now that's the smile I want to see. So, can you relax now sweetheart? Stop beating yourself up, we live together, we're mates now, sharing illness kind of comes with the package. Now come here. I don't want to have a bath alone."

Jamie nods "Yeah angel, I can relax. Let's enjoy this bath together." Jamie settles into the bathtub next to River wrapping his arms around him.

River lays his head against Jamie's chest. "Mm this is nice."

"Yes, it is." Jamie agrees.

The pair soak for a while before Jamie notices that River has fallen asleep again.

"Riv." Jamie whispers.

He groans sleepily.

"You should get dressed and get into bed, the water is getting cold."

"'Kay" River mumbles.

River sits up, Jamie helps him out of the tub and wraps a towel around him. River takes a shaky breath burying his face into Jamie's neck.

Hhh'HhhEEHHh’SSSSsTTTChh...HhheEHH'SSSS'TTsssTCh..HH'HhE'SSSttchh...HH'HE'eEEEessSsstcH'hhh

He slumps into Jamie.

Jamie coos giving kissing his damp curls guiding River back to the bedroom and dressing him in fuzzy fleece pajamas tucking him into the bed. He kisses his cheek.

"I'm just going to go make you a nice cup of honey lemon water. I'll be right back."

River doesn't answer, his eyes are already closed his breathing heavy. Jamie watches him fondly for a moment before walking out into the living room and starts the kettle when he hears a rustling coming from the bedroom, the rustling quickly turns into the sound of sneezes and coughs.

Hhh'ESS'sSTch...HhEh'ESS'hTSCH'hh...HH'HhheHESS'sSS'Tchh...HH'ES'sT'CHhh...HH'ESSS'CH'huh...Hh'HHhh'HE'sss'TSCHhh

Jamie turns to see River standing in the entryway to the kitchen listing forward. Jamie rushes over to River to support him.

"What are you doing out of bed angel?"

"You weren't there."

"I'm just making you some hot water with honey and lemon I'll be right in. Come on let's get you back into bed."

River starts to nod his head, his face falling, mouth open expectantly before he turns away burying his face in his shirt.

Hhh'ESSSTttCH...Hhhh'ESTCHuh... Hhh'ESTtCH'hh... Hhh'HhhHHEH’ESSSS'St'chh..Hhh'ES'STt'CH'hh..Hhh'HE'EsssTt'CHH...Hhh'HE'ss'TttCH'hh... Hh'HHhe'ESS'ST'ccCh'hh

"Bless you"

Jamie allows River to lean against him as he walks him back to the bedroom and into the bed.

"I'm just going to finish your drink but I'll be right back." Jamie says with a quick kiss.

River nods, his eyes closing as his body relaxes and his breathing evens out.

Jamie goes back out into the kitchen finishing the tea. He also grabs a bottle of Tylenol, decongestant, and another box of tissues. He takes the mug of tea, the pills, and the tissues and sets them on the nightstand. He slides into the bed next to River. He gently brushes a curl behind his ear. River sighs turning into Jamie.

"I brought you some medication. Do you think you can take some for me and drink this?"

River nods.

Jamie carefully guides the mug of honey lemon water to River's lips, River takes a tentative sip.

"Good." Jamie encourages.

"Can I have another kiss?" River requests.

Jamie smiles pressing a soft kiss to River's lips

"Now here's the medication."

After River takes it wincing through his swallow Jamie plants another light kiss on River's mouth.

"Mmmm" River sighs contentedly.

"Feeling a bit better?"

"When you kiss me yes." River says with a cheeky smile.

Jamie chuckles but also gives in easily, willing to do anything for River that makes him feel better and forget that he’s sick and gives him a gentle soft kiss. River sighs into Jamie's mouth.

"Do you think you can drink a bit more for me?"

"Will you keep kissing me if I do?"

"Always."

"Mm, I'll drink the whole thing."

Jamie laughs and kisses River. He then grabs the mug and helps River drink a little at a time. After a drinking a quarter of the mug River shakes his head, unable to drink any more.

"Okay, that's okay, thank you, you did good."

"Now will you keep kissing me?"

Jamie chuckles shaking his head but the answer isn't going to be anything other than yes.

Jamie and River trade soft kisses until they both drift off to sleep.

***

Jamie is startled awake in the middle of the night by a violent fit of coughing.

"Jam." River whines between the brutal throaty coughs.

"Oh, angel." Jamie holds River close rubbing his back as the coughs tear through his body. When the coughs finally subside Jamie presses a kiss to his temple. "Let's take your temperature again."

Jamie feels River's head and finds that his fever has returned. "103.2." Jamie reads aloud frowning at the thermometer. "Your fever's gone up."

River gives a tired groan. "My head is pounding and it feels like I swallowed a cactus."

"Here take some Tylenol. Let's get the fever down. Then maybe you'll be able to sleep."

Jamie helps River to sit up and swallow down the pills.

"There you go Rivy. Now lie down and get comfortable. I'll be right back. I'm going to get you a cool compress."

River protests gripping Jamie's wrist.

"Shhh. Shh, I'll only be a minute. You just close your eyes and rest. I'll be back before you know it. I'm not leaving you angel."

"Mkay" River says sleepily, his eyes already drooping closed.

"I'll be right back. I promise."

River is already half-asleep as his eyes fall closed and his body goes slack.

Jamie hurries into the kitchen grabbing the cold compress and a glass of water. He brings the supplies back into the bedroom and places the cool cloth on River's forehead.

River gives a small moan. "Jam."

"I'm right here angel, I told you, I'll always be right here. Shhh. Go back to sleep."

River's head lolls toward Jamie but his eyes remain closed.

"I love you."

"Love you too sunshine."

Jamie runs his fingers through River's sweat-dampened curls. River's breathing eventually evens out.

"Rest, I'll be right here."

Jamie doesn't go back to sleep instead he watches River as he sleeps. His face is pale except for the spots of pink in his cheeks. Jamie strokes the cool cloth along his brow.

When the sun begins to stream in through the window Jamie slips out of the bed.

"Wha.. wha.. where...where.." River's words are broken up by coughs.

"I'm right here, angel. Just went to the kitchen to get you something to eat."

"Not hungry."

"You should try to eat a little something.”

River gives a pitiful whine. "Hurts to swallow."

"How about a bit of toast and some broth? It’ll probably feel nice on your throat."

"Fine."

Jamie settles back into the bed. River curls into him resting his head on his chest.

Jamie grabs the bowl of broth and a spoon, feeding River only a few bites before he pushes the bowl away.

"Come on, Rivy, you've got to eat more than that."

"Jam."

"I know angel, but it'll help for you to have more I promise."

"No, no, not that." River scrunches up his face. "Gonna—“

HH'HhhhEEHH’Hhh’ESsSsSTTchHhh..Hh'ESSSSCHHH'hhh..Hhh'Hhh'TtttSSSsSSSssTTCh

Jamie wasn’t quite fast enough to set the bowl down on the nightstand before River sneezed, the jostling of his body causing a little bit of the broth to spill out of the bowl onto the comforter. River groans. "Sorry, Jam, sorry—“

Hh'Hhesss'ssSTTCh…Hu'uh'HH'HH'HH'he'ESSSTCHuu

"It's okay angel. It's nothing to apologize for, just get the sneezes out."

HH'HE'HHHEEHhsSS'sTChhhUu...Hh'HE'EssSSTChuu…HHh...Hh'He'ESSsTCh...Hh'HHE'ESs'sh'hh...Hhh’TtSSssTCh

"Bless."

River's breath hitches. " I can't sto-stop"

Hh'Hhe'e'Es'SSTT'CChh

"Bless you."

"I don't wanna keep snee-snee-sneezing.” River whimpers.

Hh'Hh'HeHH’EssSSTTCHhuu…HhEhh’ESSSS'TTCh…HH'HE'HhEH’TtSSsSssSSTTtCHh'HHu…

Jamie does the only thing he can, he lays them down on their sides pulling River close against him face to face and offering him comfort through touch and his words. “I know Rivy, it’s exhausting. But it’s a good sign, you’re body is fighting to get you well. It’ll pass.”

“I’m sorry.” River says his voice weak and stuffy and a little deeper from the illness.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." Jamie assures him.

River sniffles before vaulting forward with another set of sneezes.

Hh'HH'E'SSsssTttChUh...Hh'HH'HHEHE'sSsssTttCh....Hh'HH'E'sSsssSSSTttChuu

“There you go Riv, that’s good, just let them out.” Jamie encourages bringing a tissue up to River’s nose. “Can you blow for me angel?”

River tries but as the discharge is released he spills over with 6 more sneezes followed by a bronchial sounding cough.

"Jam" He whines as the sneezing and coughing dies down.

"I'm here angel, I've got you."

"Will you kiss me again?"

Jamie smiles finishing up wiping River’s nose “How can I say no to my angel.” He places a light feathery kiss on River’s lips.

River pouts. "That's not a real kiss, that’s a barely there kiss.”

Jamie chuckles “It’s a you’re sick and need to be well so I’m not pushing your limits kiss.”

“What about a I want you to feel better so I will heal you with my kisses kiss?” River asks.

Jamie shakes his head but his mouth is pulled up in an amused smile and always unable to deny River anything he leans forward again pressing his lips to River’s in a stronger but no less chaste kiss.

River hums against Jamie’s lips.

“And this is an I love you kiss.” Jamie pulls back to say before pressing his lips more firmly into River’s.

“That’s more like it. How about a this is what you'll get later kiss?" River suggests waggling his eyebrows his meaning clear.

Jamie smiles with a small shake of his head but glad to see that River’s good humor has maintained despite his cold and deepens the kiss pressing into River's mouth allowing the tips of their tongues to play with each other. River gives a little moan, which quickly turns into a hacking cough.

Jamie pulls back. "Now do you see why we shouldn't be doing this?"

River looks up at Jamie. "But your kisses make me feel better."

Jamie laughs. "You're ridiculous. You're adorable but you're ridiculous."

“So that means you’ll give me more kisses?” River’s face is a mixture of pleading and hopeful.

Jamie rolls his eyes but presses a gentle kiss to River's head.

"And what is that supposed to be?"

“It was a relax and give your body time to heal properly and I will kiss you with more intention later kiss.” Jamie replies placing another sweet kiss on River’s temple.

“And that’s a you know I want to give you more but it’s best that you save your energy for getting better right now kiss.” He places one more soft caress with his lips on River’s cheek.

“And that’s an I adore you and you’re my everything but I can hear and see how exhausted you are and it would do you good to get some more rest kiss.”

"But can I please get a your lips are the only lips I want every day the rest of my life no matter whether you're healthy or sick kiss?"

"Mm, that's a big one." Jamie grins.

"Can you handle it?" River asks cocking an eyebrow.

"Of course I can, that's every kiss I give you my River."

River beams at Jamie and leans forward capturing his lips in a passionate kiss. When the kiss breaks River sighs contentedly.

“Now do you think you can try to eat a little more?”

"Can I get one more kiss?" River asks expectantly.

Jamie sighs fondly. "Okay, but only one more Riv.”

“Then you better make it count.” River whispers.

“I have a feeling you won’t be disappointed with this kiss.” Jamie says with a smirk.

“Well, don’t keep me waiting.”

“This is a my dearest River, my sunshine, my angel, my soul-mate, will you marry me kiss?"

River’s mouth gapes open in surprise but before he says anything Jamie wraps one arm around him, carding his other hand through River’s mussed curls capturing River’s lips in a deep, tender, inquisitive kiss. River clasps Jamie’s shirt, clinging to him like a life-line.

Jamie pulls back, looking into the sparkling green eyes of River’s that are glistening with tears, the smile on his face is like a life of it’s own, radiating with brilliance. He feels the steady pulse and presence of River next to his heart flutter like a million butterflies taking flight.

"And this is a yes, my Jamie, my sweetheart, my beautiful wolf, my soul-mate I will marry you kiss." Once more the distance between them closes in a kiss that embodies pure, true love.

A year and a half later the United States Supreme Court in the case of Alldridge vs Montana rules any law illegalizing a relationship between a wolf and human as unconstitutional. That first fall proceeding the ruling Jamie and River hold their wedding ceremony back at Mahihkan Ranch surrounded by their family and friends all found from both of them leaving their lives in separate cities miles apart from each other and running to the mountains where they had nothing to lose and found everything in each other.

~The End~

Additional A/N: 

Chapter title comes from the song "My First, My Last, My Everything" by Barry White

 

Edited November 18, 2023 by Not Telling
Format changes

[brownsasha11]

@Not Telling another great chapter. Really enjoyed the way you incorporated River being Jamie's safe place and how he was able to block out those around him and enjoyed time together. Love River being sick and cheeky at the same time. Kudos really enjoy your writing ✍️ 

[dwaekki]

Omg this was everything I wanted it to be!! I'm so glad you're back and what a comeback you've made. I LOVED reading about these 2 from beginning to end and I can't wait to see what's coming next from your incredible brain if this is the standard! Thank you for creating such beautiful characters in such beautiful love, I'll always love to read what you create 😭😭❤️

[thesneezyowl]

@Not Telling I am soooooo happy to see you back and everything is going well! To say you have been missed would be the understatement of the year!!! I have adored these 2 and your writing from the first chapter. The last chapter made my heart burst!! Allergies, colds, caregiving, sweet love story wrapped up in a pretty, little bow … it had it all. Thank you for writing such a well written, fetishy final chapter (and entire story)! I can’t wait to see what new characters and storylines come next!!! 

[funbusej]

What a perfect ending to this rollercoaster of a story!!!  I loved every chapter and am eagerly reading and enjoying your newest story!!  I just noticed when I was reading this...you really named your characters River and Phoenix?  Are you a fan of his?

[Not Telling]

@brownsasha11 Thank you! Yeah, with the restaurant scene I wrote out multiple difference scenarios several involving his PTSD disallowing him from being able to manage and them having to leave because of the overwhelming intensity of his anxiety. That felt true to the challenges prisoners face when rehabilitating themselves into society, particularly those that were held for prolonged periods in Special Housing Units/Solitary confinement, upon their release but ultimately I decided that Jamie having the strength to endure both because of his love for and his desire to give to River and and because he feels safe with him felt like the best scenario. 

@dwaekki & @thesneezyowl ❤️ I'm so glad that you both enjoyed the end. Sometimes the story flows out of me like water, other times, like with the ending of this story, it's like pulling teeth to get the words to flow and then when they do they don't fit, like trying to stick a square peg in a round hole. I don't know why the conclusion of this story gave me such trouble, but my goodness did it ever. I knew that I wanted it to end with the Supreme Court Ruling, I also knew that I wanted River to get ill, and I really wanted a "them living life" scene but it just wasn't coming together cohesively. But the pieces finally all fell into place. I found the motivation in part to your comments and the attention and devotion you showed to this story. So thank you for all your wonderful and encouraging comments, they help breath life into a story and make the challenges writing presents worth it. Also, thank you for hanging with me even when I wasn't creating. 

@funbusej Thank you!! That is so funny, I had not made that connection at all, I think it's coincidental, it wasn't intentional at the very least, although it's possible my subconscious brain made the connection. 🤷‍♂️ Strangely enough, when I'm writing a story, coming up with names, especially for the main characters, is one of the more challenging bits. I want the name to be suitable to the character and how I envision them. Sometimes I have the name in mind before I begin to write the character but more often the name comes as I begin to create the character in my mind. I am a fan of gender neutral names so I knew I wanted at least the main characters in this story to have that. Before I named him I had the thought that River's curls were like running water flowing around rocks in a river and thus the name River was born and the more he came to fruition in my mind the more I thought the name suited him.

As for Phoenix, when I first began writing the story I originally drafted his name as Rowan. I changed it to Phoenix after I came up with the name of his company "The Firebird Group LLC" which was derived because I thought it sounded like the name of a asset management firm and because I have a bit of a thing for Phoenix lore. I then thought having his company name be a play on his name was golden! I also wanted a name that while not too outrageously outlandish was also unique and that could have a cute nickname and I thought that qualified under both, so all in all it was a perfect fit. 

 

Cheers! 

 

[AntheaHolmes]

Oh my god! This was amazing! I loved it. So beautifully written and I'm so happy for both to overcome the obstacles! 

[Wirescrossed]

I love them, they're so adorable!!!!! Dhjsjakskejebe

[Avocados]

I never expected a sneezefic to hit me in the feels so bad!!! This is so well written and detailed. I love Jamie so much and I was so glad we got to see his sneezing as well

[Not Telling]

@AntheaHolmes Thank you! It is so satisfying to see them get their happy ending. 

@Wirescrossed You and me both! haha Jamie and River are my precious boys. 

@Avocados

On 11/29/2023 at 8:17 AM, Avocados said:

I never expected a sneezefic to hit me in the feels so bad!!! This is so well written and detailed. I love Jamie so much and I was so glad we got to see his sneezing as well

I appreciate that! Thank you so much! ❤️ Jamie and River definitely hold a special place in my heart.