Various Hetalia shorts (M)

[Flufferdust]

Oh my goshhh! Austria in denial is so adorable ;;w;; <3 What a wonderfully fluffy drabble, I can't believe I missed it! (Have I mentioned that I adore the way you write PruAus? Cuz I totally do!) and the DenNor definitely pulled at my heart strings. Den tearing up is seriously the cutest thing, and it definitely pulled at my heartstrings! Wonderful job, as always!

[Pyrus_Fangmon]

DenNor!!!!!!! YESH!

This just made my night!

[Akahana]

Can I just, cry a little? I've been waiting for Norge to say something loving and not tsundere for a very long time and Denmark's response to finally getting reassurance that they are a thing is so sweet and I'm so happy!!!

[Maus_17]

This was so sweet! I thoroughly enjoyed how Norgie was so vulnerable and willing to let himself just.. Let down his walls around Denmark this once. Pulled at my feels, and I loved it so much. I adore your DenNor. *claps* nice work, Tea!

[Guest]

Awww... I feel like I'm about to diiiiieeee!!! That was just so... WOW.

Totally made my day!

[Not_Telling]

OHHHHHHH MYYYYYYY CUUUUUUUTENESSSSSSS THAT WAS SO FREAKIN ADORABLE OMGGGGG

:D :D HOW DO YOU DO IT?!?!

[Hachimitsu Tea]

Title: Overexcited

Pairing: newly established GermanyxItaly

Word count: 1,827

Germany awoke gradually that morning feeling unusually content, although he wasn’t immediately aware of the source of his happiness. It was Saturday, which meant no work, which was a step in the right direction, to be sure, but the fact that it was Saturday alone didn’t normally bring him quite this level of bliss. That was when something warm and soft shifted in bed beside him, fitting itself right up against his muscular chest. Germany’s brow furrowed in puzzlement and his eyes fluttered open, intending to investigate the source of this pleasant warmth.

His heart did a summersault when he found a familiar auburn-haired head snuggled into his chest, that single never tamed curl sticking out from the side, and one slender, tan arm draped over Germany’s waist. Italy…

Now Germany remembered; the two of them had stayed out late into the night, eating, cuddling, sipping wine, celebrating Germany’s birthday. An excited shiver ran down Germany’s spine as he recalled a private slow dance on the restaurant’s balcony, Italy gazing up at him with those gorgeous sparkling eyes of his from where his head was rested on Germany’s chest, artistic fingers exploring his pecs as he smiled softly up at his partner. Italy had been pressed so close to him, and when Germany’s hand had drifted shyly down Italy’s back so that it hovered just above his adorable little bottom, Italy’s cheeks had pinked as he shifted himself so that Germany could touch it properly…

The shiver that had started in Germany’s spine continued up the back of his neck and proceeded, strangely enough, to his nose. The blond found his eyes fluttering shut as the shiver became a teasing tickle. He twitched his nose exaggeratedly, puckering his lips, attempting to relieve the tickle without moving his hand which was resting in the center of Italy’s back. The tickle continued to grow lazily.

“Nghhuhhhh…” Germany sniffled, bringing his finger under his nose as his mouth eased open in preparation.

He waited, kneading at his nostrils with his knuckle, but to his surprise the sneeze never manifested properly. Germany waited a beat longer, just to be sure, then lowered his finger with a sigh of relief. He hadn’t wanted to disturb the pretty little Italian snuggled up against him. Germany’s hand settled once more on Italy’s lower back and was partially relieved, partially disappointed, when his fingers met the waistband of boxers that Italy was wearing. After the undeniably romantic evening they’d shared last night, he’d half-hoped that Italy would join him in bed naked…

The tickle in his nose that Germany had just succeeded in rubbing away flared up again with a vengeance. It came on so strong and so suddenly that he had no choice but to release it with a sharp “HIRKSHUH!! EKKSHUH!!”

His nose was still twitching with irritation when Italy shifted against him and gave him an affectionate squeeze.

“Bless you, bless you,” Italy said with a yawn.

“Huhhh… Huhhhhhh…!” Germany could give no response but the desperate hitching of breath.

This caused Italy to lift his head. Germany’s eyes were clamped shut against the need to sneeze so he missed the sleepy smile Italy aimed at him. He brought one delicate finger to the tip of Germany’s nose, applying gentle pressure as he rubbed it in a circular motion. Germany’s nostrils flared desperately as he hugged Italy close and sneezed openly over his shoulder.

“EHHHHTSHUH!! HEHETSHUH!!... HUTCHEH!! …HURRRUSSHHHHHOOOOO!!”

“Bless you!” Italy exclaimed, taking his finger away from Germany’s nose and handing him a tissue. “Veh, someone’s sure sneezy this morning! Are Germany’s allergies bothering him?”

“I don’t think so,” Germany said gruffly as his cheeks reddened behind his tissue. He tried to blow his nose quietly but when he saw how closely Italy was watching him, he opted to just dab at his nose instead. “It just happens in the mornings sometimes… Nothing to worry about, ahem…”

“Are you sure?” Italy asked concernedly. He propped himself up on his elbows and cupped Germany’s blushing cheeks. “Your face is kind of red, but… you don’t feel warm… You’re not coming down with anything, are you?”

“I’m fine, really,” Germany insisted. His eyes darted up to fix on the ceiling, unable to meet Italy’s gaze any longer out of embarrassment. “S-sorry I woke you.”

“It’s ok,” Italy said brightly, snuggling into Germany’s chest again. “Germany couldn’t help it that he had to sneeze! Besides, if I’m awake, I can enjoy cuddling you more!”

As awkward as those statements made him feel, Germany couldn’t help the tiny smile that formed on his lips. The sight of that smile made Italy’s cheeks pink happily and he giggled as he hugged the German and kissed the base of his throat. Germany returned the hug shyly, nuzzling his face into the crook of Italy’s neck. Italy hummed with pleasure as Germany’s lips brushed his skin.

“You still smell like that cologne,” Italy breathed.

Italy had given Germany a bottle of expensive cologne as a birthday gift, and both of them had agreed that Italy had done a spectacular job at picking it out.

“Thank you again for that,” Germany murmured, kissing Italy’s neck once more.

“Can I tell you a secret, Germany?” Italy asked playfully as he rubbed Germany’s chest. “That cologne smelled really good in the bottle, but I think it smells even better on you. Being so close to Germany, being able to smell it on you gets me feeling a little excited…”

Suddenly Germany was aware that his leg had slipped in between Italy’s at some point, and that Italy hadn’t been kidding about being a little excited. Germany’s nose began to tickle just as Italy leaned up to kiss his lips. Nostrils twitching, Germany tried to pull away, but Italy chased him, nibbling gently at his lip. Desperate not to completely ruin the moment by sneezing on Italy, Germany did his best to hold them in.

“HDKCHT!! HPPCHT!!” Even though Germany had stifled his releases successfully, they were still loud and unexpected enough that they startled Italy, the shock straightening out his curl briefly as he jerked away. Germany was a bit relieved that Italy was no longer kissing him, because stifling those sneezes had only made his nose tickle more. He turned away from Italy and released them into the crook of his elbow.

“HETKUTCHUN!! EGGSHUN!! …Hehh.. HETCHEH!! ETKUSHHH!! HETKUSHUNNNnnnn…!! HEPISHHHH!!”

Just as Germany’s nose was beginning to run a little, he found a tissue being brought to his nose and a gentle rubbing sensation of slender fingers on either side of his tingly nostrils. The massage coaxed another “HEYESHHH!! EPSHOH!!” out of him, and Italy continued to hold the tissues for him as he awkwardly blew his nose. When he was done, Italy tossed the tissues away, then leaned in and kissed Germany’s nose.

“Bless you, bless you!” he cried. “Bless Germany’s sneezy nose over and over! Are you sure you’re not catching cold?”

By this point, Germany had a sneaking suspicion about what might be causing his sneezing, and the thought of admitting it to Italy made him blush even more deeply than he already was. “No, it’s nothing. Really Italy, you don’t need to worry.”

Italy pouted concernedly at him, searching Germany’s eyes for the truth. “Veh… when Germany sneezes so many times like this, I can’t help worrying. You’re such a hard worker that I’m afraid you won’t take the rest you need even if you get sick.” Italy’s eyes were beginning to fill with tears, and it made Germany’s heart clench guiltily. “When I think about Germany burning up with a fever as he forces himself to work through it, too embarrassed to ask anyone for help… it makes me s-so sad…!”

“Italy…” Germany cupped Italy’s cheeks, his own face burning as he leaned in and shyly kissed Italy’s tears away. “I promise you, I’m not getting sick. I… I, uh… I l-love you and trust you, so… I swear, I won’t hide something like that from you, even if it’s difficult for me to admit it. Ahem, so uh… please, don’t cry.”

Italy sniffled, his hands settling on Germany’s broad shoulders as he turned his head so that he could take Germany’s next kiss on his lips. “Veh… thank you, Germany… I’m so happy to hear you say that.”

They kissed again before Italy pulled away and wiped his eyes. Germany ran his thumb tenderly over the corner of Italy’s lips, wishing that they would curl once more into the smile that never failed to get his heart pounding. After a moment’s hesitation, Italy granted him a small smile, nuzzling into the palm of Germany’s hand.

“You owe me for making me cry,” Italy said with a playful pout. He shifted his hips so that he was straddling Germany’s leg again.

The stabilizing color rose again in Germany’s cheeks with a vengeance. Italy hadn’t stopped moving his hips even once he’d settled into position, making it abundantly clear what kind of payback he was hoping for. Right on cue, Germany’s nose began to tickle again in anticipation. Italy’s eyes had fluttered closed in enjoyment, so he didn’t notice Germany’s predicament until it was too late for either of them to do anything about it.

“HERRESHYUU!! HEDJESHH!!” Germany paused, nostrils flared, then released another highly satisfying “HEGGRESHHOOO!! HEDDESHHH!!”

“Veh! You scared me!” Italy squeaked as Germany sniffled and rubbed his nose. “What could be making Germany sneeze like this?”

Germany peered up at his lover abashedly, grudgingly deciding he owed Italy the truth considering how much it seemed to be worrying him. “I think, uh… I think it’s because you keep getting me worked up.” His cheeks flushed brightly at his own admission.

“Worked up?” Italy repeated, his eyes widening. “So… Germany’s sneezy because he’s excited…?”

“Well, erm… s-something like that, I guess,” he admitted embarrassedly, avoiding Italy’s gaze.

The concerned look slipped off Italy’s face and was replaced by a slightly mischievous smile. “So… if I do this…” Italy reached down and began to rub teasing circles on Germany’s inner thigh.

Like clockwork, Germany’s nose began to tickle. He gave a strong sniffle and bit his lip, trying to prevent it from developing but as Italy’s fingers slipped upwards another inch, he found his breath hitching helplessly. He brought a finger desperately under his nose, but it was too little, too late.

“KERCHUSHHH!! ERRUSHOO!! …Ugh-huh-huhhhh… HUBRUSHHHHUH!! HUHUSHHUH!!”

Germany’s cheeks were bright red as he rubbed his nose self-consciously, but Italy’s face lit up with a radiant grin as he took Germany’s hand and pushed it away from his nose so that he could kiss the blond’s lips.

“Tee hee hee, I think Germany and I are about to have a lot of fun.”

Italy hummed happily as he plucked a handful of tissues from the box on the night stand. With the plan that was rapidly taking shape in his head, Germany was going to need them.

[SterlingSilver]

OMGH. OMGH. That last drabble-... SO HAWT. Seriously, there is nothing more hot than that situation~

I cannot even handle it x333. Lovely work as always, Tea~ Just simply stunning >w<~

[Pyrus_Fangmon]

Oh my lord! Bless his sweet nose!

Heeheehee

[Flufferdust]

Oh my goddddddddddddd. //fans self

I cannot believe I didn't notice this, Oh my god! Everything about this was so absolutely perfect and extremely hot. ^/////7/////^

“Can I tell you a secret, Germany?” Italy asked playfully as he rubbed Germany’s chest. “That cologne smelled really good in the bottle, but I think it smells even better on you. Being so close to Germany, being able to smell it on you gets me feeling a little excited…”

This was so amazing, I can't even function!!!! If it wouldn't be so annoying, I'd probably end up quoting the whole thing here!! |D I absolutely love how flustered Germany gets in these situations, and even more so how he knows exactly what to say, even if he's unsure of how to express it!!

[Akahana]

Yeeeeeeeeeeees so hot

[Sarah Hall]

Oh wow!! I can't help but feel excited by this piece wow!! That was incredible, well written, beautiful!! I loved the twist to this story also, I thought that maybe the cologne was the issue, but what you did was 100 times better!!

[Bobsuperawesome]

Can I request one? If yes:

Denmark X Norway. Denmark has a really bad sneezy cold, and he's embarrassed about it, and doesn't want to sneeze in front of Norway. He tries to get away from Norway whenever he has to sneeze, but because he has to sneeze a lot, it looks like he's just trying to get away from Norway and when he confronts him...FLUFFF

[Hachimitsu Tea]

N'awwwww, that sounds really cute X3 I'm always up for writing DenNor! I'll get right on that!

[Hachimitsu Tea]

Can I request one? If yes:

Denmark X Norway. Denmark has a really bad sneezy cold, and he's embarrassed about it, and doesn't want to sneeze in front of Norway. He tries to get away from Norway whenever he has to sneeze, but because he has to sneeze a lot, it looks like he's just trying to get away from Norway and when he confronts him...FLUFFF

Title: Avoidance

Pairing: Gakuen!DenxNor

Word Count: 3,128

Denmark loved Norway. He knew many people found it embarrassing to admit something like that so openly, but Denmark wasn’t one of them. He’d shout it from the top of a mountain if he didn’t already know that it would humiliate the object of his affection. As far as Denmark was concerned, time not spent with Norway was time wasted.

Today was different, though. He still wanted to be with Norway, of course, but today, in his condition, he was forcing himself to refrain. Denmark gave a congested sniffle and rubbed tiredly at his sore, red-tipped nose. Yet another tickle was developing deep in the recesses of his sinuses where he couldn’t rub it away before it needed to be released. Denmark’s sleepless-shadow-ringed eyes scanned the corridor of the science wing, peering blearily into the faces of passing students, making sure that Norway wasn’t among them. The coast seemed to be clear… His tissue-filled hand hovered at the ready, his nostrils flaring, going slightly cross-eyed as he lingered on the brink…

“AGGPHOOO!!” Denmark sneezed explosively into his tissues. “HAGGPHHHT!! UHEGGPHOOO!!”

“…Sick?” a deep, gruff voice asked.

Denmark tried to pry his eyes open to see who was addressing him even though he was pretty sure he knew from the voice, but another sneeze stole over him and he had to pitch into his tissues again. “ERREGPHOOO!! EHTPHOOO!!”

He turned away from his classmates and faced the lockers as he blew his nose with a wet gurgle. Finally he was able to confirm who had spoken to him, and as he’d suspected, it was Netherlands. The Dutch boy had a pen in his mouth, gnawing absentmindedly on the nib-free end, his arms folded and one eyebrow arched in slight distaste. Denmark gave him a weak smile, shivering, though the school wasn’t particularly cold.

“Ugh… yeah… is it that obvious?”

“Painfully,” Netherlands said dryly.

When Denmark’s smile became apologetic, Netherland’s expression softened minutely. Denmark could tell, in spite of his friend’s fairly inexpressive face (he was rather used to reading those), that Netherlands was concerned for him. Netherlands tilted his head back casually and he examined Denmark down his nose.

“Fever?” Netherlands grunted around the pen hanging from his lips.

“HIGGPHHHHHUT!! …Yeah,” Denmark said, his voice muffled by his tissues. He coughed hoarsely into them before blowing his nose.

Netherlands began unwinding the scarf from around his neck. “Shoulda stayed home.” He hesitated, frowning slightly down at the scarf he now held in his hands, then, to Denmark’s surprise, began to wrap it around Denmark’s neck instead. “I expect you to pay to have it cleaned when you’re done with it.”

Exhausted as he was, Denmark couldn’t help smiling, touched by his friend’s consideration. He did feel a bit warmer now. “Thagks, Buddy. I was freezid’!”

“Hmm,” Netherlands hummed, crossing his arms again. “Seriously though, why’dja even bother comin’ to school t’day?”

Denmark opened his mouth to reply, but felt another sneeze coming on. He snatched some more tissues from the packet in his pocket, twitching his nose exaggeratedly against the tickle. “Ehhhhh….!” He waited, one eye squeezed shut, his nose wrinkled. Eventually the tickle faded. Denmark rubbed at his nose with a frustrated moan before answering. “Oh, y’ kdow be… It kills be havid’ t’ go a day without seeid’ by hodey buddy Dor’s cute face!”

Netherlands rolled his eyes, but Denmark hardly saw as the need to sneeze returned again with a vengeance. He ducked into his tissues and released a sharp, wet “EKPHEH!! HERREKPHEH!! …EKKEPHEWWWW!!”

“Still,” Denmark continued with a sniff as if he hadn’t sneezed at all, “I dod’t thigk I cad sta’d t’ face ‘ib lookid’ like this. He’s used t’ the super cool, super ha’dsobe Dedbark; he probably has doh idea that eved I start sdeezi’g like crazy a’d lookid’ all gross just like everyode else whed I’ve got a cold. I’d hate t’ ruid his ibage of be!”

Netherlands gave him an utterly deadpan look. He simply didn’t know how else to react to such a ludicrous suggestion. Before Netherlands could even begin to formulate a reply, a glint of gold from a familiar cross-shaped hairclip caught his eye from the end of the hall.

“Well, don’t look now, but here he comes,” Netherlands warned.

Denmark’s eyes widened as he peered cautiously over his shoulder. His gaze swept over the passing faces for a moment before falling on Norway. His hope was to escape before Norway noticed him there, but by the time Denmark saw him it was already too late; their eyes met. Denmark’s already fever-flushed cheeks reddened further. Although he was bone-tired and longed for nothing more than to stay right where he was until Norway got close enough for Denmark to pull into a warm hug, the thought of letting Norway see his obviously illness-stricken face, of allowing him to hear his harsh, uncontrollable sneezes was just too embarrassing. Before Norway could say anything, Denmark ran for it.

******

Although Denmark had cursed this particular fact countless times in the past, he was now glad that he shared none of his first three classes with Norway. This made it easy to avoid him. Unfortunately, they did share fourth period.

Denmark poked his head cautiously into his shop class, making sure that Norway hadn’t arrived. He let out a little sigh of relief when he saw that only Sweden was there so far; not even the teacher was in the room yet. Denmark ignored Sweden and Sweden ignored him as Denmark took his usual place at the bench on the opposite side of the room from him. Wow, was Denmark ever tired. He dropped his books wearily on the pockmarked surface of the worktable, folded his arms on its surface and lowered his aching, congested head into his arms.

For a moment, he just allowed himself to bask in the fact that it was dark in the shelter of his arms, that he was able to rest, and that he had Netherlands’s warm scarf to bury his face in. He did so, but the fibers tickled his nose and made him sneeze yet again.

“IDJISHHHUU!! EDJESHUHOOO!! EKKASHOO!!”

“Noisy,” a horrifyingly familiar voice grumbled.

Denmark’s body stiffened and he glanced nervously up over the wall he’d made with his folded arms on the table. Oh shit, it was Norway, and he was heading straight for him. Denmark’s feverish mind panicked, struggling to quickly formulate some way of getting away from Norway before he saw how crappy he looked. Denmark’s cheeks were already burning over the fact that Norway had clearly just heard him sneeze.

Norway had just pulled out the stool across the table from him when Denmark took the only action he could come up with under the circumstances; he jolted to his feet and made a run for the wood supply closet where he proceeded to shut himself in.

In his weakened state, even running the tiny distance from his table to the closet had him out of breath and coughing. Denmark held a finger firmly under his dripping, tickly nose, praying that he wouldn’t sneeze again. Even with the door closed, there was no doubt Norway would be able to hear him. His breath hitched several times, but his finger did the trick at trapping his sneezes in and keeping them at bay. Denmark waited, heart pounding, half expecting Norway to come pound on the door and ask him what he was doing, but he didn’t. Relieved though he was, Denmark couldn’t help being a tiny bit hurt by this. Didn’t Norway care where he was or why he’d suddenly run away from him?

Denmark remained in the closet as he listened to the muffled sound of his fellow classmates filing in and picking up where they’d left off on their various projects. He let out a weary sigh and slid down the door to sit on the floor. If only he were home in bed. Denmark’s burning eyes slid shut…

The next time Denmark became aware of his surroundings, someone was pounding on the door he was holding shut with his back. He blinked dazedly. Had he fallen asleep? Denmark gave a miserable, congested sniffle and rubbed his eyes groggily.

“Brother? Y’ still in there? Open up!”

Norge…he does care! Denmark thought hazily. Oh how he longed he could simply let Norway in, curl himself around him and let his beloved sooth him… He slipped into a fevered fantasy about soft kisses peppering his brow and gentle fingers caressing his cheeks…

“I know you’re there, annoying brother!” Norway called through the door, pounding on it again. “Quit ignoring me and let me in! I need some wood!”

No matter how he longed for Norway to care for him, he still couldn’t bear the thought of letting him see him looking so pathetic. His only choice was to get rid of Norway somehow. Denmark stood unsteadily and grabbed a random piece of wood off the shelf. If he gave Norway the wood he needed, he might go away. He’d just laid his hand on the doorknob when a sudden sneeze stole over him. Desperate not to let it be heard, Denmark pinched his nose and clenched his jaw, trying to hold it in. One, two, three silent sneezes racked his body, then a fourth, fifth, and sixth, and he wasn’t done. Holding them back was only increasing his need to sneeze. He needed to deal with this situation quickly. His eyes still clamped shut against the teasing tickle, Denmark opened the closet door just wide enough so that he could shove the piece of wood out, then slammed it shut again.

He clenched his jaw again as a seventh, eighth and ninth sneeze rocked him. Denmark ripped some tissues desperately from his pocket and rubbed his nose, hoping he could satisfy the tickle that way. All he managed to do, though, was coax out his twelfth sneeze. His nose and ribs were starting to hurt.

“This isn’t the type of wood I need,” Norway said peevishly. “Just let me in and I’ll get it myself.”

That was out of the question. Denmark hurriedly snatched a few more random pieces of wood from the various shelves and tossed them out the door. He took advantage of the ensuing clatter of wood hitting the floor to let out a few sneezes properly.

“AAKSHIEW!! AAAASHUU!! HEGYESHHHHUH!!”

“What’re y’… why won’t ya just let me come in?!” Norway demanded. “You’re makin’ this harder and more annoyin’ than it needs t’ be!”

“Please, Dor, just go ‘way,” Denmark begged, his breath still hitching.

“…What?” Norway sounded as though he couldn’t believe his ears.

“Go ‘way!” Denmark repeated, his voice higher than normal as that stubborn tickle continued to assault his sinuses. “Nuh-nowww…!”

He couldn’t hold his sneezes back much longer. Denmark strained his aching ears for the sound of Norway’s retreat, his breath hitching helplessly. After a long pause, Norway’s footsteps withdrew from the other side of the door, and not a moment too soon. Denmark curled up into a little ball on the floor in an attempt to muffle his ensuing fit as much as possible and released it at last.

*******

By the time lunch rolled around, Denmark was more miserable than he’d even thought it was possible to be from a simple cold. His whole body ached, his head felt as though it weighed thirty pounds, his nose was running like a faucet, and his chest hurt. Maybe he should just go home, he thought as his weary legs carried him slowly into the cafeteria. But he’d driven to school today, and in his current state, he was pretty sure it would be terribly unsafe for him to be operating a motorized vehicle. How was he even going to get home at the end of the day? Maybe Netherlands would drive him…

Denmark made a pathetic attempt at a sniffle as he pulled out his wallet and peered inside to see how much money he had. There was enough for a decent lunch, but he honestly wasn’t hungry. In fact, the thought of food made his stomach churn a little. Perhaps he’d better skip it.

“Brother!”

Denmark looked up hazily before he even had a chance to consider that this might not be in his best interest. His eyes widened in terror as he saw Norway approaching him from half-way across the cafeteria. Time to make himself scarce. Without so much as a backward glance, Denmark turned on Norway, intentionally weaving erratically through the throng of students so that he’d be more difficult to follow and ducked into a dark, empty classroom. His plan to lose Norway must have worked, because there was now no sign of him.

Denmark sighed with relief, hunkering down in a corner and shivering pitifully behind his borrowed scarf.

******

“EHKSHIEW!! UHKSHIEW!! KERCHESHIEW!! Huh…huh, uhhhhhUHUGSHIEW!! HERREKSHHHEH!!”

Denmark’s non-stop sneezing had been interrupting his civics and geography class, so the teacher had suggested that he go out and get a drink or something and come back when his fit had subsided. Although the water he’d consumed had provided some relief to his parched throat, it had done nothing for his sneezing. Unsure of what else to do, Denmark had retreated to the bathroom where he now sat on the lid of the closed toilet, reclining tiredly against the tank, his head tilted back as he released his sneezes helplessly into the air in front of him.

“EXXXCHEH!! UPCHOOO!! HERREGSHUU!!”

Denmark was so wrapped up in his misery that he didn’t even notice someone else entering the bathroom. He was oblivious to the other boy taking care of business, washing his hands… and then turning around curiously to examine the shoes of the person making all the noise in Denmark’s stall. The boy approached Denmark’s stall door slowly, but this too slipped by Denmark; all he could do was sneeze.

“ERKCHUSHHHH!! KEGGSHIEW!! HUHEXXXSHHH!! FUEEHSHOO!! EPPCHIH!!”

“…Brother?”

The uncertain voice came so unexpectedly that it scared Denmark’s next sneeze away. He very nearly responded, but bit his tongue just in time to silence himself. Norway knocked on the door of his stall.

“Occupied!” Denmark croaked.

His panic only increased when he saw Norway’s shoes enter the stall next door, heard the clatter of the lid being closed and then watched those shoes disappear as Norway climbed up onto the toilet.

“Occupied!” Denmark repeated desperately. “Poopin’! I’b poopin’!”

Norway’s head appeared over the top of the stall not a second later, looking straight down at him. If Denmark had had the presence of mind, he would have kept his head down to prevent Norway from seeing the obviously sickly state of his face, but his fever prevented him from thinking clearly and all he could think to do was return Norway’s gaze sheepishly. Norway was silent, his brow furrowing slightly as he took in the evidence of Denmark’s illness.

“Come out,” he said.

The tone of Norway’s voice told Denmark in no uncertain terms that this was not a request but an order. Shivering, Denmark stood and reluctantly unlocked the door. Norway immerged from the stall next door, still frowning. Denmark coughed quietly and rubbed his chapped nose, his eyes averted in shame as he waited for Norway to say something. The other boy remained silent but instead laid the back of his hand on Denmark’s cheek, checking his temperature. There was something like sadness in his normally unreadable blue eyes when he realized the severity of Denmark’s fever.

“…Why’ve y’ been avoidin’ me all day?” Norway asked quietly, lowering his hand.

Anyone who didn’t know Norway as well as Denmark did would have said that his voice had been as devoid of emotion as usual, but Denmark was almost certain he detected a hint of hurt there and it made him feel bad. He shrugged, blushing, fiddling nervously with the end of his scarf.

“’Mbarrassidg,” Denmark mumbled, keeping his eyes fixed on the sinks off to the side.

Though Norway’s face wasn’t usually very expressive, there was no mistaking the surprise and bewilderment there now. “You? Why?”

“’Cause…” Denmark trailed off, his eyes fluttering shut, his mouth easing open. “Ehh…EGGSHEW!! HEKKESHHHUH!! ETESHHHHEH!! …Ugh… You’ve got this ibadge of be as this macho hottie who’s practically iddestructable, but… I look so gross a’d weak right dow… I wasd’t sure how you’d react t’ havid’ yer dreabs crushed…”

Norway gave him a look that clearly said he was wondering whether he’d suddenly entered some bizarre parallel universe. “…You’re… jokin’, right?”

“Sorry, Dorge…” Denmark sniffled, rubbing at his nose again as he continued to shiver. “Sorry I disappoidted ya… Ya still like be… right?”

As absurd as Denmark’s misconceptions were, he asked this final question with such concern and vulnerability in his eyes that Norway’s heart couldn’t help aching just a little. Before he could second guess himself, Norway was pulling Denmark into his arms even as his cheeks turned a brilliant pink. Denmark melted instantly into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Norway and nuzzling into his warmth. Norway’s fingers slipped into Denmark’s wild golden hair and began to stroke it gently as the Dane laid his head on Norway’s shoulder.

“Idiot,” Norway sighed. “Moron. Halfwit. I’ll never understand the junk that goes on in that hamster wheel y’ call a brain.”

“Mbb… warb…” Denmark murmured, his eyes slipping shut.

Norway licked his lips nervously, his cheeks becoming almost as red as Denmark’s, and then he touched a gentle, lingering kiss to Denmark’s temple. “Tell me next time you’re sick, y’ dunce. I thought…”

Norway bit his lip, catching himself before he could let slip exactly what embarrassing concerns Denmark’s behavior had fostered in him.

“Didja thigk I was bad at you?” Denmark guessed drowsily.

Norway stiffened, unpleasantly surprised that Denmark had guessed precisely what had been on his mind.

“I could dever be bad at you, Dorge,” Denmark murmured. “You’re too cute.”

Norway rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue in exasperation, but his hand rubbed Denmark’s back soothingly without his awareness or permission. “Stupid brother…”

“EKKUCHEH!!” Denmark sneezed openly over Norway’s shoulder. Then he yawned. “Ugh…sleepy…”

Norway let his lips brush Denmark’s temple again. “Guess I better take ya home.”

“Mbb…” Denmark grunted, kissing Norway’s neck and hugging him gratefully.

A pleasant little shiver ran down Norway’s spine. “You’re prob’ly expectin’ me t’ make ya some soup, too?”

“Wouldja?” Denmark asked.

“Greedy,” Norway huffed, rubbing Denmark’s back. “Next you’ll be sayin’ y’ want me t’ run ya a bath ‘n’ nap with ya.”

“That’d bake be so happy,” Denmark croaked sleepily. “Thagk you, Dorge… You’re th’ best…”

“Hmph. Don’t forget it, either,” Norway grunted, leading his unsteady friend to the main office so that he could get them both excused.

[SterlingSilver]

So, so precious~~ SO SO PRECIOUS~~

OMGH THE FLUFF~~ This was absolutely adorable, Tea <3 I always love your drabbles~ They make me so happy x33

You really balance Denmark's eccentricity with his line of logic, and Norge is perfectly in character too~ Great job, as per usual~

Also

“Occupied!” Denmark repeated desperately. “Poopin’! I’b poopin’!”

I LAUGHED SO MUCH. I COULD NOT BREATHE xDDD

Poop jokes will never not be funny, and the fact that Denmark would rather his crush believe he was dropping a load instead of just being sick is hilarious.

[Hachimitsu Tea]

Poop jokes will never not be funny, and the fact that Denmark would rather his crush believe he was dropping a load instead of just being sick is hilarious.

Den and Nor happened to come across the book Everybody Poops while wandering around a bookstore once so Denmark figured the cat was kind of out of the bag on that one XD

[Flufferdust]

What an amazing thing to find on my break!!!! This made my day a million and a half times better, oh my gosh! You're Denmark always leaves me rolling and I couldn't help but feel sorry for poor Den. Norge was perfect as always and it melted my heart how Norge latched onto him thinking that Denmark was mad Ahh ;7; this drabble pushed so many amazing buttons!!! (And I laughed like an idiot at that bathroom part jeeez) XD You write them both so well!

[Sarah Hall]

Omg yes poop jokes!!! Holy this was so funny and fluffy! It went together so well! Awesome Job Tea!

[Not_Telling]

OHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYY GOODNESSSSSS THERE ARE NO WORDS FOR THE AMAZING CUTENESS THAT IS THIS DRABBLE OMGGGGGG!!!!!

*explodes*

I'm dead now. Thanks.

[Maus_17]

Tea, this was amazingly cute and hilarious! I laughed so hard when Denmark claimed he was taking a dump instead of being miserable just so Norway wouldn't see him. XD I died. DIED. This was awesome! owo

[Bobsuperawesome]

OH MY GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!! Omg this was better than I even thought!!!

[Pyrus_Fangmon]

N'awwwwwwwwwwwwww Denmark! I wanna snuggle him!

[Hachimitsu Tea]

Title: Software

Pairing: Sweden+Ladonia

Word count: 1,848

“P-Papa…?”

The uncharacteristic use of that affectionate title was enough to alert Sweden immediately that something was wrong, or at least it would have been if he wasn’t still half asleep. Hand feeling around blindly on the bedside table for his glasses, Sweden’s eyes naturally gravitated toward the only significant light source in the room: the large, luminous green numbers on his digital clock. The numbers informed him that it was currently 3:14. Sweden swallowed the exhausted groan that longed to spill from his lips when he heard the child who had woken him give two little sniffles and then lapse into a regular, rhythmic “ehpchoo… ektchoo… itchoo…hitchoo…”

“Wha’s wrong, Sea?” Sweden asked groggily, sitting up. As sleepy as he still was though, he was pretty sure he could guess from the sneezing what the problem was.

“I’b dot Sea, s-stupid… uhh…uhpchoo… heyekchoo…” The boy broke off coughing, deep, chesty coughs that on their own were painful sounding enough to motivate Sweden’s legs to swing themselves out from underneath their warm blankets and settle on the chilly wooden floor in an instant.

Sweden heard a rasping, shuddering squeak that informed him that the boy had begun to cry. Sweden hurried to crouch at his son’s side, blinking hazily in surprise when he realized that it was not Sealand before him but Ladonia. He couldn’t remember the last time Ladonia had called him “papa.” Had he ever called him that? No, this wasn’t the time for idle wonderings like that; Ladonia was suffering and needed his help.

“Sorry… S’ ok, Ladonia,” Sweden murmured as soothingly as he could, one large hand settling on Ladonia’s back as he wiped the boy’s nose on the corner of his nightshirt. “Shh, you’ll be ‘lright. ‘ll fix ya right up…”

Ladonia let out another choked sob, shivering uncontrollably as Sweden guided him gently closer, pressing his cheek against Ladonia’s forehead. His eyes narrowed in concern at the feverish burn that greeted his touch.

“It bust’ve beed a trojad v-virus,” Ladonia choked. “There was ad e-ebail… I thought it was f-frob by Pokebod fad club but… whed I op-ped it, I s-started feeli’g – upchoo…hutchuu… etchuu…etshoo… hekchoo…”

Ladonia was sneezing and sneezing and couldn’t stop, the releases rocking his already shivering little body steadily. Sweden swept him up into his arms, neither noticing nor caring the drippy mess on the face that was being pressed into his shoulder.

“Hebphoo…” Ladonia sneezed softly into Sweden’s nightshirt. “Huhephoo…Etphoo…erkphoo…”

Sweden set the boy on the bathroom counter and snatched up a handful of tissues, clamping them over Ladonia’s twitching, flaring nostrils. Ladonia’s eyelids fluttered for a moment, and Sweden was about to instruct him to blow his nose when he let out a final “eggphoo… Huhephoo…” into the tissues and produced a bubbling honk without being coached. He sat there on the bathroom counter, trembling and wheezing as he allowed Sweden to clean up his face.

Sweden’s heart gave a stutter of alarm when the tissues came away with a dark stain on them, and though the bathroom was lit only by a small nightlight in the corner, he could tell the stain was red. It took him a moment to realize that it wasn’t blood; he’d only accidentally smeared the streak of paint that Ladonia wore across his face. Sweden let out a nearly silent breath of relief and snatched another handful of tissues to finish the cleanup job, tossing the others in the trash near the toilet.

Ladonia looked hazily up at Sweden through red-rimmed eyes, and in spite of the often dismissive and occasionally cruel things Ladonia said to Sweden, the man could tell that the boy fully trusted him to take away his misery. Groggy and worried as he was, Sweden could feel the warmth and resolve rising in his chest at this realization, and he leaned in and pressed a reassuring kiss to the top of Ladonia’s head.

“Don’ worry,” Sweden said quietly, rubbing Ladonia’s back. “Bought s’me new anti-virus sof’ware th’ other day that’ll getcha feelin’ better right ‘way. Jus’ hold on.”

Sweden begin to draw away, intending to retrieve the product code so that he could install the software onto Ladonia’s hard drive, but shaking little hands clutched at his shirt, stopping him.

“Dod’t leave be…” Ladonia croaked. He sniffled as tears began to flow anew, and evidently the movement of moisture in his passages must have set his nose tickling again. “Hertchoo… herkchoo…hudjoo…nehtchuu…”

Sweden hurriedly grabbed some more tissues and pinched Ladonia’s nose gently, massaging away the tickle. Ladonia’s breath hitched softly a few more times, but then he let out a sigh of relief. He leaned tiredly against Sweden as his face was carefully mopped up again. When he was done, Sweden scooped him up once more, carrying him to his home office where he kept the information he needed.

While Sweden was busy single-handedly installing the software onto Ladonia’s system, the boy started coughing again. Sweden patted his back absentmindedly as he worked. By the time he had the new software installed and had set it about running a full virus scan, Ladonia’s coughs had become uncontrollable and sounded like they might be in danger of tearing his throat. Tears leaked helplessly from the corners of his eyes as he choked and gagged. Sweden’s exhausted mind flailed in panic, wondering what to do. He rushed the boy to the kitchen and got him some water and more tissues.

“Drink slow,” Sweden warned, lifting the glass to Ladonia’s chapped lips.

Ladonia whimpered but tried to do as he was told. Sweat stood out on his fever-flushed face as he clung helplessly to Sweden. The man’s brow wrinkled concernedly as he brushed the sweaty copper hair away from his son’s forehead. If only Finland were here to help, he’d feel so much more confident. He imagined Finland rocking the boy and singing softly to him in that sweet, lilting voice of his and his heart ached with longing…

“Papa,” Ladonia rasped. “I’b c-cold… Hapchoo! Heheshuu!”

He pitched into Sweden’s chest as two unusually forceful sneezes tore through him. Sweden fetched him some more tissues, buying himself some time to think as he helped Ladonia blow his nose. He tried to think, what would Finland do?

Then it came to him: the sauna! It was warm enough there to satisfy even Ladonia’s fever-induced chills, comfortable enough that they could spend as much time as was needed there, and damp and steamy enough to soothe the tickle in Ladonia’s throat so that he wouldn’t have to cough so much. He could bring some Vicks in with them, and the vapors would be further released by the heat and moisture and maybe even be enough to break through Ladonia’s congestion sufficiently to allow him at least a few hours of sleep. Though Finland was absent, Sweden silently thanked him for the idea.

Ladonia’s feverish head lolled against Sweden’s shoulder as the man started towards the bathroom again to fetch the Vicks. “Wh-where’re we goidg?”

“Got ‘n idea t’ help ya,” Sweden grunted. “Jus’ hang on a li’l longer, ‘kay?”

Ladonia sniffled miserably but nodded. Sweden grabbed the Vicks from the bathroom cabinet, then took a blanket from his own bed and wrapped Ladonia in it snuggly. They’d have to head through the backyard to reach the sauna, and Ladonia was chilled enough as it was. Ladonia allowed himself to be swaddled and rested his head on Sweden’s shoulder again without any further questions, even as Sweden opened the back door to take them outside. He tried to move hurriedly towards the sauna through the mid-autumn chill as exposure to it caused Ladonia to produce a hoarse whine and even Sweden shivered slightly.

Ladonia’s breath began to hitch again in his arms and he perched his chin on Sweden’s shoulder as his nostrils flared. “Eddchoo…” he released a cloud of spray over Sweden’s shoulder where it was quickly whipped away by the wind. “Ekkchoo… hutchoo… hetkishh…hetkichhooo… heggshoo… hehupchoo… hehepshoo…”

Ladonia was still sneezing steadily as Sweden closed the door to the sauna quickly behind them and immediately set about adjusting the temperature controls to heat the stones in the center of the room. “Itkishoo… Itshoo…epchoo… iddxxchoo… etchuu…”

Having done all that was necessary to prepare the sauna, Sweden turned his attention back to Ladonia again. He produced more tissues and pressed his finger under Ladonia’s nose, stopping his sneezing fit in its tracks. Ladonia’s mouth was slack in anticipation of more sneezes, but as the tickle slowly receded, he allowed his nose to be blown again.

Sweden was relieved to notice that the temperature in the small room was steadily rising. The sweat that had been standing out on Ladonia’s face in little beads began to trickle down his skin and Sweden decided that it would be ok to take the blanket away. He folded it and, leaving Ladonia on the bench, set the blanket outside to sauna’s door. Sweaty sleepwear was stripped away and the two of them sat in their underclothes, silent except for Ladonia’s sniffling and occasional coughs. Sweden unscrewed the lid of the jar of Vicks he’d brought and rubbed it gently around the base of Ladonia’s neck.

“Y’ warm ‘nough?” Sweden asked quietly.

Ladonia nodded tiredly, taking a deep, slow breath of steam and Vicks vapors and releasing it slowly. His head nodded onto Sweden’s shoulder once more as sleep began to call to him. Sweden cradled him, rocking his boy slightly, not worrying about the way the humidity and heat made their skin stick a bit. Ladonia’s eyelids fluttered as Sweden used a small towel to sponge the sweat from his son’s face. Sweden caressed his cheek softly.

“Try t’ get s’me sleep,” he urged gently. “Anti-virus software’ll prob’ly have ya good ‘s new in th’ mornin’.”

Ladonia’s eyelids slid closed as Sweden continued to rock him. A small, chapped pair of lips touched the side of Sweden’s neck, lingering just long enough to convey their deliberateness and gratitude. Sweden felt a surge of warmth and affection rising in his chest again. It took Sweden a moment to realize that the gentle rumbling in his chest was his own voice, humming his child a quiet lullaby. How long had he been humming? He didn’t remember beginning. Part of him found this slightly embarrassing, not confident in the quality of his voice. If Finland were here, he could have provided Ladonia with the sweetest song…

If Ladonia found his father’s singing unsatisfactory, he gave no outward indication of this. As his consciousness drifted, his thumb found its way into his mouth like the child he fiercely denied being. Though Sweden’s mouth found it difficult to form the expressions he felt inside, his happiness and relief he felt at having the grumpy son who often tried to push him away asleep in his arms was reflected clearly in his sea-green eyes.

“Sweet dreams,” Sweden murmured.

Ladonia, fast asleep, said nothing, but the weight of his arms as they shifted more firmly around Sweden’s shoulders was a good enough response for him.

[Kaede]

Well, this is at least a billion times better than the story I wrote about computer viruses.