Sneezy Dean Variety Pack (Supernatural, M)

[swann_ee_song]

Prentended???

I think you've just ruined my life. I thought it was real! *cries*

[meh..]

P.S. I did like your fics. Tongue was interesting.... but definitely kinda hot. Specially at the end. And the Weekend at Bobby's one was pure awesometasticness.

.. I'm considering coming over to the darkside and concentrating on being a Dean!girl. 'Cause a) Jensen's acting abilities may be slightly at a higher level than Jared's. But I haven't made up my mind and this season has Jared potential. He's not only cute but so very intelligent in all the interviews/panels I've oogled on youtube. Yes, oogled. c) He was a fantastic director for that ep. But I would be soooooo sad to lose him from in front of the camera. Guh! d) Sam's character has been a d-bag for a while now. It's kinda upsetting.

*cough* That is all.

[Lady Blessington]

Prentended???

I think you've just ruined my life. I thought it was real! *cries*

[meh..]

P.S. I did like your fics. Tongue was interesting.... but definitely kinda hot. Specially at the end. And the Weekend at Bobby's one was pure awesometasticness.

.. I'm considering coming over to the darkside and concentrating on being a Dean!girl. 'Cause a) Jensen's acting abilities may be slightly at a higher level than Jared's. But I haven't made up my mind and this season has Jared potential. He's not only cute but so very intelligent in all the interviews/panels I've oogled on youtube. Yes, oogled. c) He was a fantastic director for that ep. But I would be soooooo sad to lose him from in front of the camera. Guh! d) Sam's character has been a d-bag for a while now. It's kinda upsetting.

*cough* That is all.

Didn't he do well with the directing? I guess it's a bit cynical but I wasn't expecting much, and honestly I'm not sure exactly what his role was as director, but I thought that episode was really well put together, and I was weirdly proud.

I find Jared way more charming than Jensen though, in interviews and when I (for like three seconds) met them at the LA con and stuff. I remember watching the actors' commentary for, I think it was maybe IMTOD, and finding Jared so much more personable/intelligent-sounding/engaging than Jensen, and that's never really changed. I don't know if Jared is just the bigger scammer and knows how to read what people want and play to it, or if Jensen is really as self-absorbed as he sometimes seems, or if Jared just is friendly and maybe more invested in the promotional silliness they do and Jensen is shy and uncomfortable with the posturing. Whooooo knows. I couldn't sleep all night after having my picture taken with them so I obviously think they're pretty awesome.

Are you feeling the call of the Dean? It's nice over here. He goes to the hospital sometimes. Rrr.

[swann_ee_song]

Lucky lucky you! With the picture and all... I probably wouldn't sleep for a week!

I agree about Jared being more charming. Hmm. What I would really like? Is the pleasure of meeting (like really getting to know) them in person. But since that is a crazy crazy dream, I would also like the pleasure of seeing them on set, like watching them work up close and personal.

But if not, I'll settle for some torture in the interim.

... The call of Dean may be appealing. Although, I gotta say limp!Sam is still just awesome. Though rundown!Dean is also really just love.

[Lady Blessington]

Angel Ex Machina

Prompt: Dean is determined to go on a hunt even though it's thirty degrees out and pouring rain. He's also coming down with a cold. Sam and Dean get lost outside, and take shelter in an abandoned shack or something, with no heat and only one flimsy blanket between them. Sam is forced to snuggle with Dean in order to keep his sick, feverish brother warm. Lots of worried!Sam, and freezing cold!Sick! Dean. I am not opposed to Wincest if the author wants to go that direction. (If you're feeling really adventurous, Castiel can be there two, and they both tag team Dean, and take turns cuddling Dean).

:::

"I don't know. We could always wait until--"

"HIH-XXGTZHZH!"

"Bless you. Until next week. It's not gonna do any--"

"KGHGHSHSH!"

"--anything for a--"

"Hah..."

"--for a---"

"Hoh--hh--"

Sam fishes a clean napkin out of the burger bag. Dean grimaces and captures his flaring nostrils just in time.

"EHH-HIXXISHSHSH! DJSHSHOOO! KLGTCH-shuh!" He blows his red nose and tucks the soggy paper into his fist like it's got secrets on it. "Cubb agaidd?"

Behind him in the dark parking lot a car pulls up to the drive thru speaker box, raindrops cutting through its headlights. "I was just saying, it's wet out there, and cold, and you're... and nobody's gonna get hurt again until the next full moon anyway, so..."

"KDD-TCHCHCH!" The eruption crunches Dean forward in the seat. He straightens, dabbing his pink nostrils. "Dah."

"Dah?"

The glare could eat through metal.

"Oh."

:::

"Who goes cabpigg idd Dovebber?"

Sam watches the white cloud of Dean's breath expand in the flashlight beam and disappear. "Werewolves, apparently."

:::

Three silver bullets. Dean pumps them in. The thunder murmurs in sympathy.

:::

"Where's the road?"

"I don't know."

"Cad't have friggidd' sprouted legs add left."

Sam pops his collar. "Stranger things have--"

"Dod't say it."

:::

"Are you taking off your coat?"

"This is good exercise. We should do this bore oftedd."

"Dean?"

Sam catches him on his way down.

:::

Sam picks the lock while Dean leans beside him against the peeling cabin wall. Rain crashes on the overhang.

"There." Sam feels for a light switch but finds none. He scans the musty air with his flashlight. "All clear. C'mere."

:::

"Cas, if you get this call me." Sam puts down his phone and snuggles closer to Dean on the thick carpet. Polyester drapes are all the covers he could find.

Dean coughs out a string of explosions and presses his face into Sam's chest.

"Shh." Sam rubs up and down his back and pulls the curtains higher.

:::

It sounds like a baseball whizzing past his ear. "Cas?"

"I got your message."

Sam flicks on his flashlight.

"You're not clothed. Is this Us Time?"

"What? No, no we had to get undressed because all our stuff's soaked."

"TSSH! DSSHSH!"

"Dean's sick. Can you help me warm him up?"

His ears pop like a plane's pressurizing around him. Then they're all on a beach, Dean curled up on a pink-and-orange-striped blanket, Sam cuddling him, Cas standing close. The sun beats down. They're still naked.

"Uh." Sam squints against the glare. "Where are we?"

"Cuba." Castiel looks out to sea.

"Why?"

"It's warmer here."

Dean blinks muzzily up at Sam, his nose glowing red under the blue sky. "Wh..." He shivers and squirms closer.

Sam thumbs his shoulder blade, relishing the thick heat of the sun. Goosebumps stand out on the chilly expanse of skin. "Soak it up, man."

:::

"I was here when that tree was planted."

Sam looks over his shoulder down the beach, then back at Castiel over Dean's hair. "Hmmh."

"She was young. She wanted to feel the power of creation."

Dean snuffles in his sleep and rolls toward the angel. Cas rests a palm on his forehead. Dean sighs and relaxes into stillness.

"She never told anyone what she had done."

:::

Shoulder to shoulder to shoulder on the blanket, they sip mojitos and watch the sun go down in a copper colored sky.

"Cas," Dean croaks, "I like your style."

[swann_ee_song]

*snickers* Your witty title is awesomeness. And so are Dean's sneezes. And the cuddly goodness. And of course Cas's meddling.

[Foxfire]

Although I'm a Sam-girl, I loooove everything you write. And you have certainly the hottest sneeze spelling

[Raining Strawberry]

Aaahh! Still enjoying this thread very much, despite still being a Sammy girl. I'm still on season 4, but read Weekend at Bobby's anyway... aww, poor Dean... (gaah, I love pukiness... *cough*) I absolutely love Sam and Dean all huddled up together in the freezing cold shack, and I agee with Dean... love Cas' style.

PS- "The glare could eat through metal." Sheer brilliance.

also, "You're not clothed. Is this Us Time?" I nearly died.

[Lady Blessington]

*snickers* Your witty title is awesomeness. And so are Dean's sneezes. And the cuddly goodness. And of course Cas's meddling.

I'm such a sucker for cuddly goodness lately. Oh slash, how you have shown me the way, LOL. Thank you so much!

Although I'm a Sam-girl, I loooove everything you write. And you have certainly the hottest sneeze spelling

Yeah right! Thank you so much, and thanks for checking this out even though it's not your Winchester of choice. That's awesome.

Aaahh! Still enjoying this thread very much, despite still being a Sammy girl. I'm still on season 4, but read Weekend at Bobby's anyway... aww, poor Dean... (gaah, I love pukiness... *cough*) I absolutely love Sam and Dean all huddled up together in the freezing cold shack, and I agee with Dean... love Cas' style.

PS- "The glare could eat through metal." Sheer brilliance.

also, "You're not clothed. Is this Us Time?" I nearly died.

You're a Sam girl but you spoiled yourself for Dean fic? What's wrong with you, LOL! I'm honoured. Thanks!

[RSB]

Just started looking at these supernatural drabbles--I'm not too familiar with the series but reading all of these makes me want to see it! Thanks for posting so much on here! All the characters are so intriguing, I can't decide which one I like best. And the cuddles! Love love love the cuddles.

[Lady Blessington]

Just started looking at these supernatural drabbles--I'm not too familiar with the series but reading all of these makes me want to see it! Thanks for posting so much on here! All the characters are so intriguing, I can't decide which one I like best. And the cuddles! Love love love the cuddles.

I think bi-bro girls probably have it best. There's so much to love! It's awesome to me that you read these without having seen a lot of the show. Thank you muchly!

There's not a huge amount of sneezing in this next one, but I thought I'd post it anyway, so, yes.

Mr. Sensitive

Prompt: To cuddle or not to cuddle, that is the question. Dean has the flu and his skin is all painful/sensitive, but he's freezing and Sam is so freaking warm...

Sam wakes in the night to a distinctive lack of cuddles. He spreads his arms across the bed and does not encounter Dean.

With a click of the bathroom lights he finds him. "There you are."

"Ngh." Perched naked on the edge of the tub, Dean flinches and slaps a hand over his eyes. "Bad."

"Sorry, sorry." Sam flips the switch and dips them in darkness. "Stomach bugging you?"

"Shh."

"Sorry." Sam shuffles forward and finds Dean's forehead with his palm. "Ouch."

Dean twitches away. "Agh. You can say that again."

"Headache back?" Leaning out into the bedroom, Sam peers at the clock radio. "You're due for some more meds." He hears a chattery inhale. "Dean?"

"Ain't exactly Hawaii in here, is it?"

"Nope." Sam feels for the first aid kit on the back of the toilet and digs out the right shape of pill bottle. "Better make it three this time. I'll get the crackers." He walks into the lamp, but finds the sleeve of crackers on the bedside table without knocking over the glass of water.

"What's the verdict?" He listens to Dean crunching softly in the dark. "Back to bed?"

Dean sighs. "I dunno."

"Seems like you've got a chill. If we don't warm you up, you could really spike."

"I guess."

"Or I could stay out here with you." Sam fumbles for one of Dean's warm shoulders.

"Ow! Stop it."

"'Ow'?"

"'Ow.' Everything hurts." There's a hollow sound like the jockeying of two smooth surfaces, then a smash. "Damn it."

"Uh. Don't move. I'm getting the lights... now." Sam brings them up and takes in the wreckage of Dean's water glass, a glittering wash all across the floor. "OK. OK. C'mere." He takes the sick man's hands and steadies him around the shards to the safety of the carpet. "There." He soothes back the damp hair from Dean's bunched up forehead, kisses the brows squiggled over slitted eyes. "So..."

"Door Number Two. Back to bed."

Sam settles Dean on the mattress, then kills the bathroom fluorescents. He stretches out carefully beside Dean and squeezes his fingers.

"No touching."

"Huh?" Sam withdraws his hand. "Sorry." He pulls up the covers, but Dean spasms and paws them off.

"Whoa, what?"

"Just stay there and don't move." The mattress jitters. Teeth clack. "Crap."

"You OK?"

"Listen. I'm gonna touch you, but you can't touch me. I'm serious. Feels like my skin got worked over with friggin' sandpaper."

"Oh. Oh, I... man, I'm sorry. Is that why you were--it really is. Ugh, I suck. So why are you--"

"'Cause I'm cold, and you're warm." The husky voice is right in Sam's ear, on a puff of sour breath. A thigh inches up against Sam's, an arm draping over his waist. One nipple pokes into Sam's ribs.

"This is kinda hot."

"There is no chance."

"Aw, babe."

"No touching!"

"I get it, I'm good. I promise." Sam lies perfectly still. "Man, that's a bad flu."

"Be fine." The leg slides over Sam's. A feverish belly presses against his side. The arm contracts into a hug.

"You need anything?"

"Just this." Dean sneezes into his shoulder. "And maybe a tissue."

"Ew," Sam snorts, passing some over. "Have two."

Dean blows his nose, wriggles closer and sighs a full-body sigh. "Hhhmmm."

The next time Sam wakes up, it's to an abundance of Dean. He nuzzles the warm hair and whispers a hand to the small of his back. There's no sign of protest.

[Foxfire]

You are trying to kill me, arent't you ? I loove this! It's so sweet and cuddly and... I don't have words.

Actually, I have one: MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jamison Leigh]

^ Foxfire. I concur. She likes torturing people. This is why I love her.

<3

[RSB]

"I get it, I'm good. I promise." Sam lies perfectly still. "Man, that's a bad flu."

"Be fine." The leg slides over Sam's. A feverish belly presses against his side. The arm contracts into a hug.

Awwwwww. A feverish belly sounds so cute and warm and nice!

[27jj]

Hey look, I’m posting at a normal time! This one is seriously so full of goodness. I love how Sam wakes up because there are no cuddles:) And Dean munching on crackers in the dark. And Sam calling Dean babe. And Dean sneezing against Sam’s shoulder. And all of it. Ooh and I second RSB, looove the feverish belly

[telltale]

Cuddlesssss! I love this one EVEN MORE than usual. Which is saying something!

[Lady Blessington]

You are trying to kill me, arent't you ? I loove this! It's so sweet and cuddly and... I don't have words.

Actually, I have one: MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Heeee! OK. Thanks for all the exclamation marks! Love me some of that.

^ Foxfire. I concur. She likes torturing people. This is why I love her.

<3

Well that's just...

"I get it, I'm good. I promise." Sam lies perfectly still. "Man, that's a bad flu."

"Be fine." The leg slides over Sam's. A feverish belly presses against his side. The arm contracts into a hug.

Awwwwww. A feverish belly sounds so cute and warm and nice!

Your icon cracked me up. It's awesome to me that you took the time to let me know you liked this! Thank you so much!

Hey look, I’m posting at a normal time! This one is seriously so full of goodness. I love how Sam wakes up because there are no cuddles:) And Dean munching on crackers in the dark. And Sam calling Dean babe. And Dean sneezing against Sam’s shoulder. And all of it. Ooh and I second RSB, looove the feverish belly

Theory 2 was that you were a North American vampire. I'm glad we have this sorted out, heheh.

You picked out favourite parts! You rock. Thank you so much!

Cuddlesssss! I love this one EVEN MORE than usual. Which is saying something!

Thank you muchly!

A Nose Knows

Prompt: Another one of those curse prompts =) Dean gets cursed to sneeze every time Sam lies. Dean thinks he must be getting sick, but Sam is the one to make the connection (because he knows he’s lying) and he eventually starts telling the truth. The season (and whatever Sam’s lying about) is up to you, or it can totally be a made up situation. I can see this more gen, but I’m also ok with slash. Then I convinced her sneezekink!Sam would be an OK alternative.

A/N: Big yay for twirlycurls on LJ, who beta'd this all speedily and warmly.

SPOILER WARNING: 6.07

:::

"What was it like in the box?"

Sam shrugs. "Fine."

"HETCHCCHCH!"

"Mmh." He watches Dean's pink nostrils quiver. "Bless you."

"Fine?"

"Fine. It's over. Doesn't matter."

"AGH-KHXHXHSH!"

"Ohh, hello." Extending his legs under the picnic table, he crosses his ankles around one of Dean's.

"Hey. Focus." Dean digs up a napkin and trumpets into it.

"Mixed messages." Sam watches him stuff the napkin away and admires the redness of his nose as he gives a tiny, winded sniff.

"Sam." Dean's hair ruffles in the chilly breeze. "I showed you mine, man. I know you're not so much with the overabundance of feelings right now, but when we get your soul back, you're gonna have a lot of crap to get through. Our little caring and sharing sessions? They weren't for nothing. I don't understand it, but they helped."

Sam calls up his dimples and lowers his voice. "But we could fuck."

Dean looks at him in that new way he has, so Sam knows it was the wrong thing to say.

"Just kidding."

"UH-KFFGSHKH-huh!"

Sam swallows. "You getting a cold?"

"Damnit. Let's just go."

:::

"Who's Alice?"

"Friend of Gwen's."

"XXHKHTCHOOO! Ahhh." He snuffles. "You sly dog."

"Wait, what... is she on IM?"

"Wants to see you when you're in town. What town was that again?"

"PIttsburgh."

"HEXXSHSH-ih!"

Sam blinks.

"I mean Buffalo."

"Hih-DGTGDTCHCH!"

"I mean... San Francisco."

"Mind like a steel trap." Dean abandons the laptop and pads to the bathroom for tissues. "Was she good?" he calls. "Should I tell her what you're wearing?"

"I'd rather just sit here and watch you sneeze."

Dean flops back down, nose scrubbed clean and pink. "Too bad. Looks like the moment's passed."

:::

"I could really go for some turnips."

"You--HITCHCHCH! You hate turnips."

"Can't find it on the menu. Too bad."

"AKH-THFDJISHSH! Since when?"

"Since Samuel."

"KHKHXDTCH!"

"He gave me a new love for root vegetables in general."

"HESHSHSHSH!"

Sam rubs his mouth. "You wanna get out of here?"

"Sam, it's breakfast." Dean's eyebrows are scrunched above his napkin mask.

"I'm not hungry."

"HAH-KHKHSHSHSH!"

:::

Dean smells like soap and shampoo, all warm with his damp porcupine hair. Sam climbs into his bed and drapes an arm around him.

"Huh?" Dean rolls and peers at him in the lamplight.

"This OK?" Sam thumbs the small of his back.

A long pause. "Yeah."

"You've got a pretty bad cold."

"HH-IDSHSH-uh!"

"Mmm." Sam's hand wanders to Dean's ass. "Thanksgiving's in May."

"HRRR-IKKHSHSHSH! What?"

"Oh, fuck." Sam twines both arms around him and grinds in.

"Angh." Dean nips his ear.

"Mars is full of flowers."

"GG-ISHSHSH!"

"I own twenty-seven..."

"Hah..."

"...twenty-seven pairs..."

"EHHhh..."

"...twenty-seven pairs of jump ropes."

"HIH-BLGKTCHCHCH-DZISHOOO!"

Sam kisses Dean's nose and rocks into his hip.

"What the hell are you talking about," Dean pants, twisting away for a tissue. "Is that what the kids are doing for dirty talk these days?"

"Yes."

"AHHH-HSIGXXHXHXHSHSHGT!"

:::

"Sam."

"Yeah?"

"We from Lawrence?"

Sam drags his eyes away from the beautifully flushed nose. "Does one of us have a concussion?"

"Answer the question."

"Yeah."

Dean nods. "Was hell fine?"

"Fine enough."

"HXRSH-uh!" Dean sniffles. "Hmm."

"What?"

"Check me out. I'm a human lie detector."

"Oh, you noticed that."

"Look. I'm not gonna force you to talk about it. That would be like, rape. But I know it wasn't fine. So anytime you feel like spillin', anything at all, just... I'm around."

Sam shifts closer to Dean on the hood of the car. "I can think of a better way to spend the afternoon."

"Sam, I'm serious."

"God, do you ever love brussels sprouts..."

"EH-HIGGTXSHOOOO!"

"...and ingrown toenails..."

"KKGTCHCHCH! This is the least sexy foreplay ever."

"...and witches."

"HAH... HEH-XXITCHCHCHGKGKH! Unnh, c'mere."

[Foxfire]

Gaaaaaahhh! This prompt is awesome and your fill is even more so!

It's so great when Sam recognizes That he can make Dean sneeze - best curse ever!!!!

And then end - just yum!

[Alice]

This one is definitely one of my favorites! I Love how you write the boys. Im a Sam girl at heart but I do love a sneezy sneezy Dean!

[27jj]

Theory 2 was that you were a North American vampire. I'm glad we have this sorted out, heheh.

I laughed so hard.

Gosh. You just write such freaking hot stuff. I never want it to stop.

Also, I forgot to say that I LOVE this image:

Dean's hair ruffles in the chilly breeze.

[Guest hiddensecret]

I absolutely LOVE everything you write. I am always so excited when I see that you've posted something! I really like the last one even though Dean isn't really sick. I especially like when Sam asks Dean if he has a cold and then comments that Dean has a really bad cold. And, by the way, I don't know why, but you have totally turned me on to Dean/Sam! LOVE IT!!!! I could probably quote something from each of your fics I always love certain lines and find myself reading them over and over--but I don't know how to do that. New here. I'll figure it all out eventually. Thanks for all your great writing....

[Raining Strawberry]

Amazing job, yet again. Poor, sensitive Dean... sick with every possible flu symptom... but oh so attractive. I was really happy that at the end he didn't mind Sam cuddling with him.

Despite the season 6 spoilers, I chanced "A Nose Knows", and I'm glad that I did. Gaaaah, Winchester lie detectors are an amazing invention. Like, fangirl-melting, freakishly sexy amazing inventions. Yay.

[Lady Blessington]

Gaaaaaahhh! This prompt is awesome and your fill is even more so!

It's so great when Sam recognizes That he can make Dean sneeze - best curse ever!!!!

And then end - just yum!

Isn't it a hot curse? Who comes up with something like that?? Somebody awesome, is who.

Thank you so much!

This one is definitely one of my favorites! I Love how you write the boys. Im a Sam girl at heart but I do love a sneezy sneezy Dean!

Sam is such a honey. I don't know why he does so much more for me on the giving end of comfort than on the receiving end, but he does.

I love that you read this even though it was a Dean fic. Thank you so much!

Theory 2 was that you were a North American vampire. I'm glad we have this sorted out, heheh.

I laughed so hard.

Gosh. You just write such freaking hot stuff. I never want it to stop.

Also, I forgot to say that I LOVE this image:

Dean's hair ruffles in the chilly breeze.

Thank you! "Ruffles" was totally "wavers" until twirlycurls took a look. Good on her.

I'm a little bit addicted to your writing too.

I absolutely LOVE everything you write. I am always so excited when I see that you've posted something! I really like the last one even though Dean isn't really sick. I especially like when Sam asks Dean if he has a cold and then comments that Dean has a really bad cold. And, by the way, I don't know why, but you have totally turned me on to Dean/Sam! LOVE IT!!!! I could probably quote something from each of your fics I always love certain lines and find myself reading them over and over--but I don't know how to do that. New here. I'll figure it all out eventually. Thanks for all your great writing....

Aw, man! Thank you so much. You made me smile like a goon. Thanks for venturing into slashy territory, and I love that you said this was good "even though" Dean wasn't sick, because that's how I feel about fic too, LOL, like if Dean's not sick in it, that's a handicap. I love it when they talk about Dean being sick too, like acknowledging it out loud. I don't know why it's good, but it always is.

Amazing job, yet again. Poor, sensitive Dean... sick with every possible flu symptom... but oh so attractive. I was really happy that at the end he didn't mind Sam cuddling with him.

Despite the season 6 spoilers, I chanced "A Nose Knows", and I'm glad that I did. Gaaaah, Winchester lie detectors are an amazing invention. Like, fangirl-melting, freakishly sexy amazing inventions. Yay.

You braved spoilers to read this? I stand flattered. Also I love that your emoticon is called "sillybounce." I may need to adopt this.

Thank you so much!

Catch and Release

Prompt: Dean hates sneezing in front of people (including his brother), because it embarrasses him. Only, he's coming down with a horribly sneezy cold...so he does his best to try and not sneeze, but really, who is he kidding?

A/N: Mad mad props to twirlycurls, the fastest beta in the west, whose patience in the face of technical difficulties is nothing short of dazzling.

"Uh... hhH-HUH-BPFCHKJST! Uhhhh." Dean snuffles and ducks away from Sam in the bright, breezy parking lot.

"Whoa. Bless you."

"Hnh," Dean grunts. Sam can see his arm working against his face, the hair on the back of his head rippling in the wind like an untended lawn.

"Ugh. I hope this guy cracks fast. I'm starving."

"Isn't that my line?" Dean starts toward the high rise, twists to make sure Sam's following. There's a flush to his cheeks, but it might just be the wind.

"Man. The things some people put on their balconies." Sam juts his chin toward a mass of bicycle tires dangling from a railing.

Dean snorts. "Never know when you're gonna need a... hHHH..." Sam turns just in time to catch the alarm in his eyes before Dean puts his back to him. "Hah-KTSCHSHZZHZHT! ITZHHCHCH-ih!"

"What's with you?"

"Didn't you know I was allergic to bike tires?" He sniffles hard.

"You need a tissue or something?"

"No." Dean won't meet his eyes when he turns around. His nose is going red. Sam thinks it's kind of cute.

---

"HH-HH-hhhhh. EH-HHH... hhhhhhhhh."

"You got a cold?"

"IHHHH... uhhhhgkh."

"What's with all the sneezing?"

Dean takes the napkin dispenser off the table and stalks toward the men's room. When the explosions hit, they're loud enough Sam can hear them anyway.

---

"You don't like sneezing in front of people."

Dean freezes in the passenger seat, a napkin halfway to his pink nostrils. He snuffles and lowers the paper.

"Or blowing your nose."

He's bright red against the bare trees.

"I've seen you spit out food you didn't like. You'll pee anywhere you think you won't get arrested for it. I don't get it, dude. What's the big deal? You have a cold. It's not like you can help it."

Dean swipes at his upper lip with two fingers. "Yahtzee."

---

He lets Sam cuddle up behind him in bed, skin bunching into goosebumps as the sheets shift. Sam tuts, kisses his neck and spreads a careful palm over his forehead. "You're hot."

"Thought you liked that about bee."

"And you sound like shit."

Dean coughs. "But I could do a super-creepy voice over for a cartood bad guy."

Sam nuzzles his ear. "I guess, if he's half-dead."

"The best wudds always are." Sniffling, he stiffens in Sam's hands. His chest balloons out with a jagged, desperate inhale.

"Sneeze," Sam murmurs, and kisses the tiny bare spot at the crown of his head. "I dare you."

"AH-AGHK-HHH..."

"Mmm, I like that." He nudges his nipples into Dean's back. "C'mon. Hang loose like the bike tires."

"HEH-HHHH..."

"Ohh, your abs are so hard right now. Check it out."

"IH-HHHHH..."

Sam strokes his belly. "Just let it go."

"Hat-TZZHZHCHCHCHH-hoo! HEH-XXGGHZT!"

"Yay!" Sam sneaks over Dean's shoulder and kisses a warm nostril. "Two. You get bonus points."

Dean scrabbles for tissues and blows his nose hard and fast, like he's riding the momentum.

Sam presses his lips to Dean's biceps. "That was hot."

"You are wudd kigky sudd of a bitch."

"And you should not talk anymore until I can listen without wincing." He ruffles Dean's hair. "I'll make you one of those knockout lemon drinks. We can toast your victory."

Dean rolls over and looks at Sam. His tired eyes sparkle.

"Anytime, Rudolph."

Exhalations

Prompt: Okay, I've been trying to think of a good prompt to post on here in forever, and I finally have an idea. So, my favorite thing about sneezes are the build-up. If we could have a fic (even a little one!) with Dean (and Sneezekink!Sam) where it takes him FOREVER to get his sneezes out, and he just sits there for like an entire minute going "HAH...heh...EH-" kind of thing. With a twitchy nose and watery/squinty eyes. And his sentences keep getting interrupted and everything. And Sam's just like JESUS CHRIST STOP IT I'M GONNA COME IN MY PANTS. Oh god, I would love you forever.

A/N: I re-read the prompt after I'd finished this and had a facepalm moment of, I missed the interrupted talking, so I think we're gonna need another fill on this one. But also here's this! Thank you thank you to twirlycurls, aka Speedy McSpeederton amongst betas, who caught herself some glitches and loved me up gooood about the rest.

Soon it'll be too cold to do this, at least here in Minnesota. They'll have to pay for a room, or make their way back down south. Florida. They could sleep in the car year-round in Florida. Sam watches a long, slow breath curl up toward the dark ceiling. Gators, Disney rides. He's surprised there aren't more hauntings down there. Maybe there are. They should really check.

"Hhh..."

Sam goes still. He looks to the space above the front seat.

"Hhhh." Vapors rush up and disperse. It's a flood of air from Dean's lungs. Is he in pain? His arm... Sam's halfway to sitting when he hears a wet sniffle, and freezes.

"HhhHH..."

Sam lowers himself stealthily to the seat, touches his mouth as blood rushes to his groin.

"Eh-HH..."

Dean's trying to be quiet. That's for Sam, because he thinks Sam's asleep. Sam lets the breath drag along the back of his throat, just hard enough to sound like he's deep in dreamland.

He waits.

Finally there's an exhale, strangled by a swallow. Sam watches the mist push up, sees the gap where the swallow broke up the flow.

"HH-ahh..."

Now there's some voice, a hint of exasperation. Sam flashes on Dean dropping their clean laundry bag in the mud last month. His palm finds his crotch and massages.

"G-gahhh..."

It's not that different from a noise Sam heard him make once taking a step on a hurt leg. He pinches a nipple through his shirt.

"Rr-HHH..."

Sam takes a silent, calming breath in through his nose. He smells the leather of the car, the plaster of Dean's cast, the mud drying on their boots, the french-fry scent from the stained paper bag on the floor under the driver's seat.

"HH-HH..."

His lungs are full, like Dean's. Muffled by the glass, he can hear the river outside trickling through the quiet.

"IGH-EHHH..."

Sam's wrist slips under the elastic waistband of his shorts. His other hand knuckles his lips. He holds his breath.

"Hhhhhhhh." It's shaky this time, a desperate puff of air that stretches out into a long, thin stream. It plumes up white and tumbles out across the ceiling.

Sam stops all movement. Cheeks flushed, he knits his brows.

"HHH-HHH-HADGZHZHTT-TCHCH-shoo!"

There's a damp snuffle, then a murmur. "Sab?"

Blushing, Sam sighs explosively and peeks up over the seat back. He gazes down at Dean, at his bound-up arm and his other arm, fingers pressed to a flushed nose. Dean's eyes glitter in the moonlight, breath collecting in little clouds between the fogged windows.

"Sorry."

"For waking me up?" Sam dips into the greasy bag and stretches a clean napkin down to Dean's swollen nose. "Or for not waking me up? 'Cause if you're gonna have a sneezing fit, I expect an invitation."

Dean's eyes crinkle in pleasure. His thumb finds the pulse point in Sam's wrist as he blows. "You're weird," he coughs out as Sam dabs him clean. He sniffles. "Is it me or is it cold?"

"Human blanket, coming up." Sam shimmies over the padding, shifts the broken arm out of the way and settles himself carefully onto Dean. "Better?" He kisses his temple, his warm nose. A tremor runs through the length of his body. "You OK?"

"Yeah." Dean turns his head, gasps and sneezes an enormous sneeze. "AHT-TZISHSHSH-uh!"

Sam groans, absorbing the chain of muscle contractions. He grinds into Dean and nuzzles his neck. "Gnhh. Me too."

Dean winks and squeezes Sam's ass. "Hhhh..."

Sam whimpers and rocks against him. His lips find Dean's hairline, his flaring nostrils.

"HEH-hhh..."

He presses every available inch of himself to Dean.

"KHA-XXTCHCCHHOOOO! HEH-HIXXTSHGK-ih! Hah... hah... HA-DDZHZHHSHSHSHT!"

Twitching with aftershocks, Sam listens to the river, to Dean's steady, congested breathing, to the heartbeat under his ear. His legs are twined around one of Dean's, jammed into the driver's footspace. Half-hearted moonlight glows through the condensation. "You're my favorite," he says, and Dean pats his hip. He peers sleepily at the underside of Dean's chin. "Sorry you're sick."

Dean kisses his forehead. "There are perks."

[Foxfire]

I must be dead and in heaven... These are so awesome! I lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove these!

[telltale]

I just want to squish embarrassed!Dean. SO CUTE.

It makes me so happy every time I see you've updated this thread, I can't even say.

[27jj]

Gah they're just so freaking hot!! I've been distracted by them for like an hour now.