I have the Cheese!

[squealofapproval]

I amaze you with the fact this is the 100th post this thread has so I can take the cheese. I have the cheese.

[NoV]

I build a cheese factory, and flood the market with cheap cheese! Now I have the cheese!

[VividBubbles!]

I inspect your factory and find out that the reason your cheese is so cheap is because you're using illegal cheese-making processes. Your cheese factory is shut down and you are fined millions of dollars and the cheese. For my great work exposing your criminal activities, the goverment rewards me with the cheese.

Now I have the cheese!

[Chanel_no5]

I ask politely "may I hold the cheese?" and since you're so surprised at my nice approach, you just hand it over without thinking, at which point I make a run for it. Now I have the cheese!!

[Merc_With_A_Mouth_69]

I trade you 4 bottles of Chhinkni for the cheese. I now have the cheese!

[SneezyRae]

You are so distracted by the amazing sneezing fit I have because of the chhinkni that you drop the cheese. I steal it and run. Now I have the cheese

[Snufaleeze]

While your distracted with this! ->

I take the cheese!

Now I have the cheese and an awesome duck army!

[Paul]

I attract the ducks into my garage with a duck call (which is in my band room). I return your ducks (in exchange for the cheese) because I am a nice person.

Now I have the cheese.

[NoV]

Sadly I intercept the ducks and spend several years training them to steal the freshest, most delicious cheese known to humanity. I then command them to march upon your fortress and attack! In the confusion, you are pecked by the largest of the warrior ducks and drop the cheese! It rolls from your hands and into my waiting grasp - and now I have the cheese!

[Sophie<3]

I'm friends with Gregory House and ask him to help me design a genius plan to get the cheese. Our operarion involves a donkey and Justin Bieber (both serving as a distraction) as well as Wilson as a reliable partner-in-crime. Our secret weapon are Chase'd puppy eyes. In the end, thanks to my doctor friend, I have the cheese!

[squealofapproval]

Thanks to my Doctor friend, we whiz by in the Tardis and take the cheese. Now I have the cheese, and it's halfway across space-time.

[Paul]

You feel guilty for taking Sophie's cheese on her birthday. I lie and say I'll return it for you. Now I have the cheese!

[Snufaleeze]

I catch you lieing to her and get it on film then take you to court. Since you have no evidence to prove me wrong I win the cheese and they make you give Awko $10,000 for lieing to her (your welcome, Awko).

Now I have the cheese!

[gryffin]

I am your lawyer. Now I have the cheese.

[Emily]

I am the judge and I sentence you to a lifetime of potato farming and request payment in that roll of cheese. Now I have the cheese.

[Scandinavius]

I use my connections with high government officials to have the cheese seized and moved to a classified secure location. I have the cheese.

[VividBubbles!]

I am a super secret Russian spy who was raised from birth for the very specific task of tracking down the cheese, capturing it, and bringing it back to Russia. I find you at your supposedly "secure" location and release knockout gas throughout the air vents. While everyone is asleep I sneak in and steal the cheese before hopping on a plane back to Russia!

Now I have the cheese!

[Chanel_no5]

I am Vladimir Putin.

I have the cheese.

[Emily]

America is doing what it does best and invades Russia. I am in charge of retrieving the stolen artifact.

Now I have the cheese.

[Sophie<3]

I'm friends with Obama's daughter. She helps me to the cheese, which her dad kept in a supposedly secure place. Now I have the cheese.

[gryffin]

I am Obama's daughter. You thought you had the cheese.

[Kiwifruit]

I AM the cheese. I start a Cheeses' Rights campaign and we are formally given the vote and equal pay, as well as declared owners of our own bodies! I am in charge of myself! I own me! Therefore - I have the cheese!

[TheCakeIsAlive]

Having lived on a remote mountain ridge for the last few years, I am blissfully unaware of the Cheeses' Rights campaign. I return to civilisation, see the cheese and grab it. Now I have the cheese!

[Sophie<3]

I am Obama's daughter.

Can we just take a moment to appreciate that a 29-year-old male actually typed the words "I am Obama's daughter"?! I love this game!

Also... as TheCakeIsALie is enjoying the perks of having returned to civilization (movies, friends, fast food...), I take the cheese from her, which isn't very hard, because she is completely overwhelmed by the gas prices and many other things that have changed ever since she went into exile. Then, I proceed to take the cheese to South America with me, where they have never heard of the Cheese's Rights Campaign. Now, I have the cheese.

[Scandinavius]

I pay some former guerilla soldiers in South America to steal the cheese and deliver it to me, then I get on a ship to cruise about in the Pacific Ocean. Now I have the cheese.